Yeeeeahh… this is a re-upload because something went wrong with the structure first time around and I wanted to add more to it. I needed a break from Pokemon so here you go! Characters may be a little OOC but I thought it was appropriate for this kind of story, and don't forget to review, I would greatly appreciate it!
Daria couldn't get the dark and distressing image out of her head. Seeing her friend sink into her grave like that. And there was nothing she could do to prevent it. Despite her literal and realistic look on life, she partially wanted to believe in resurrection. But not the zombieque version that she had seen in Sick Sad World's "Look Who's Coming Back for Brains". Just to have her back the way she remembered before…
"Hm, I go away for a few days and I find you in a depressive furrow. Issues we haven't explored, yet?" she could almost heard her say. If only…
"Hey, Daria…" a soft voice broke her thoughts. She jumped out of her daze, recalling where she was. Sitting in a bar, surrounded by people in black, all huddled together like a murder of enormous crows. Daria herself was wearing her normal combat boots, pair of jeans and a black t-shirt. She never liked dresses… neither did Jane…
"…Someone's birthday?" she asked in her steady tone. Trent, the source of the voice was standing next to her. He, himself was wearing a tux, but his shaggy hair and unkempt beard juxtaposed his smart exterior. His normally tired but soft-natured eyes were dull with grief. He put a hand on hers.
"How've you been since…? Janie…?"
"Top of the world, ma." The girl slumped on the counter of the bar, folding her arms on the wooden surface. Trent sighed and rubbed her back in an attempt at comfort. She slowly looked around, seeing that the room was crammed with both students and the faculty of Lawndale High. She really didn't want to be around any of them… except for Trent… it was very comforting to have him here with her.
"Listen, Daria… I need to go for a short while. Jesse needs help moving his band equipment for our next gig. Will you be ok here?" his raspy voice broke into her thoughts again. Daria looked at him.
"Sure…" she answered reluctantly, lying through her teeth.
"Ok… of you need me, give me a call and I'll be back as quick as I can." and with that, he sauntered off, not looking at anyone and keeping his head down.
Daria sank back into her own thoughts… all these people… they wouldn't understand. They just wouldn't… they didn't know what Jane meant to her… to them, she was just a "friend" or a "student". That's it. They seriously wouldn't see what she meant to Daria. Someone who she could tell anything that she felt like she couldn't say to anyone else. Jane knew things that no one else did. She kept her secrets and private thoughts, never revealing them. Nobody understood her better than Jane did. And nobody ever will. How could they? Most of them would lose their heads if they weren't attached! Couldn't this be someone else's funeral and not hers?
"Wishing for the impossible again." Daria muttered out loud "You're losing your marbles, darling." Since Jane… well, 'went' this was a more common occurrence.
"Hey, Daria!" a high pitched voice squeaked, forcing her back into reality again, much to her annoyance. She turned to see Kevin and Brittany standing there. Kevin had his shoulder pads under his tux. For god's sake… And Brittany had… dyed her hair black? Daria briefly thought back to the last time Brittany did that at one of Mystik Spiral's gigs.
"Is it Halloween?" She grumbled, not in the mood.
"No, it's Jane's-" Kevin (by some miracle) notice the flames behind Daria's irises as he wisely shut his mouth. But Brittany spoke up.
"Gee, you need to lighten up, Daria. Here." She handed the brunette a bottle of beer. Daria blinked, trying hard to keep her poker face straight.
"I don't drink."
"Oh come on, it will make you feel better!"
"No I-I-"
"Just one!" Brittany's squeaky pitch was getting on her nerves. Daria thought for a moment. Either take the beer or have to deal with that stupid tone for another few minutes…
Daria growled as she relented, taking the bottle.
"Will you leave me alone now?!"
"Sheesh, cheer up, Daria!" Daria grimaced at Kevin's response. What was there to cheer up about?
The brunette sighed as she took a long swig from the bottle…
Sometime later, Quinn –dressed in a slim halter neck with her hair in a side pigtail- appeared from the crowd. She had been having the worst day! First the rain ruined her hair, then she had to sit through the service which drove her insane from boredom and none of the fashion club or her followers were at this gathering! How could this get worse!? The only company she had was ugh… Daria. Oh yeah, that's who she was looking for!
"Hey, everyone, has anyone seen Daria? The buffet just went out and there's her favourite pizza, not that I like that stuff, ugh, they cause pimples… anyway where is-?"
A slurred yet familiar voice answered her question.
"Ah-and I saaaid 'Have you-hic- ever heard her break wind?'"
Several voices of laughter were then heard.
"You did!? How did she react?!" Jodie's voice could easily be heard.
"Oh, she was sooo piisssed!"
Quinn pushed through the crowd and saw a fairly… strange sight.
Daria was sitting on the same stool with her back leaning against the counter, legs crossed, and arms behind her head, which was tilted up towards the ceiling with her eyes shut. A stupid smile plastered on her face.
'…Ok, who is this?' Quinn thought 'Because it ain't Daria.'
"Hey, Quinn!" Kevin called over, "Come join us!" Several people joined in, Quinn notice Daria picking up another beer and taking along drink from it. She then saw several empty bottles, drained of their content, scattered all over the place. Quinn blinked but complied in walking over.
Daria, swaying a little, noticed Quinn and –taking her younger sister and pretty much everyone by total surprise- grabbed her by the arm, yanking her over, pulling her close.
"Heeey, little sissss!" she slurred, "Whaaat's up?"
Quinn, just as startled by this gesture as everyone else, pulled away, grimacing.
"Ew, your breath reeks! What's wrong with you?!" She squeals, throwing her arms down.
"Oooh, nothing! Just-just having a chaaat!" Daria answered, hiccoughing a little.
"But, Daria, I thought you… wait… Daria, are you drunk?"
Daria just snorted in response and took a long drink of beer, ignoring the question.
"Well," Brittany butted in, twirling her raven black hair, "She was sort of crabby so I suggested that she had a beer and well…" she shrugged a little, "It's not a big deal."
"No big deal?! Daria!" Quinn grabbed her sibling by the arm, pulling her off of the stool. Daria yelped and struggled to regain her balance, "Why are you doing this?! Don't you have any respect?!"
"What?" Daria blinked innocently, "Whatchu meeeean?"
"What do I mean?! Uck! I mean how you're getting drunk off of your ass during a funeral! Do you not care about Jane, Daria?! I mean, you're being so disrespectful!"
Everyone went quiet as Quinn said this, and as Daria's facial expression suddenly changed. From a fairly happy and content look, to one of absolute hurt and anger.
"Respect?" she hissed, her left eyebrow twitching under her glasses.
"Respect! You're here drinking and telling these stories about Jane when she's dead! Honestly, Daria, I knew you hated people but-"
"RESPECT?!" Daria screamed, slamming her beer onto the counter and swiping Quinn away violently. Everyone around, students and staff turned their heads at her outburst.
"RESPECT?! YOU THINK I'M HAPPY ABOUT THIS?! THAT JANE IS GONE AND I WILL NEVER SEE HER AGAIN?! YOU HONESTLY THINK I WOULDN'T GIVE A SHIT AND ACTUALLY BE HAPPY?!" FOR FUCK SAKE, QUINN! YOU OF ALL PEOPLE SHOULDN'T TALK TO ME ABOUT RESPECT!"
Quinn, frightened by her older sister's shouting, cowered back, small tears trickling down her face.
"Daria…?"
"NO! YOU NEVER WANTED TO TALK TO JANE, LET ALONG RESPECT HER! AND I AM NOT TALKING ABOUT YOURE PETTY QUESTIONS AND GRIPES I MEAN AN ACTUAL FACE-TO-FACE CONVERSATION WITH HER! I KNEW HER BETTER THAN YOU! ALL OF YOU!" Daria leant forward, directing her rage onto the crowd.
"Daria! We're all grieving for Jane, not just you! We cared about her-!" Jodie tried to argue, grabbing Daria's hand.
"OH, SHUT UP, JODIE!" Daria retaliated, karate-chopping Jodie's hand from her arm "DON'T LECTURE ME WITH YOUR STATISTICS AND YOUR GENERIC STATEMENTS OF CONFRONTATION! DON'T GO ON AT ME ABOUT THAT SHIT!" Screaming like this was causing her throat to feel like it was rubbing on sand paper and foaming at the mouth.
Jodie's face turned pale and she covered her face, Mack wrapped his thick arms around her, glaring at Daria, but he was also startled by her outburst.
Brittany spoke up "B-but- I talked to Jane…"
"WHEN YOU HAD A PROBLEM THAT A FUCKING FIVE YEAR OLD WOULD FIGURE OUT! FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, BRITTANY, HOW STUPID CAN A CHEERLEADER BE?!" Brittany, upon hearing this, burst into high pitched and squeaky tears. Typical.
"Hey, back off, man! No one talks to my babe like that, she's smarter than all of the other cheerleaders!" Kevin stepped forward, shoving Daria by the chest, knocking her backwards.
"OH SO THAT'S WHY THEY ALL WAVE AROUND A C WHEN THEY GET ONE! YOU'RE NO BETTER, QUARTER BACK!"
"Wait-?"
"What's two plus two?!"
"Uh-!"
"I REST MY CASE!" Daria lunged forward in a stumbled manner, but it was still enough to send Kevin jumping back. There was now a ten meter radius of space surrounding the still wound up and enraged Daria. Who wasn't finished.
"Huh, seems she's gone from 'feisty' to being outright savage…" A stupid nasally voice caught her attention.
"Who do we have here?!" Daria directed her rage onto Upchuck, "The world famous 'Ladies' Man'?! THE CLOSEST YOU EVER GOT TO A WOMAN, WAS YOUR OWN MOTHER!"
"Hey, hey I never said anything about Jane, why am I-"
"You found her attractive, did you?!"
"Well, yes-"
"SO WHY DON'T YOU JUST GO AND JUMP INTO THAT GRAVE AS WELL?! I'LL BE HONOURED TO BE THE ONE TO BURY YOU SIX FEET UNDER! HONOURED!"
Most students had backed off, exactly the reaction Daria wanted. She growled several obscure words at them as she sat back onto the stool, taking another beer and opening it. No-one said anything. Until…
"Uh… Daria?" The girl gritted her teeth at Mr O'Neill's voice as the teacher approached, being pushed, quite harshly by Mrs Li. A lot of the faculty were now close by, but, like the kids, most of them looked intimidated.
"What I think your friends are trying to say is that… we all cared about Jane and it pains us all greatly that she is gone from our lives… we feel just as bad as you do! But-"
"As bad as me?"
"Yes! That's what I'm trying to say!"
"AS BAD AS ME?!"
"Uh-"
Daria grabbed the beer from the counter, throwing down the last of it before turning back to Mr O'Neill.
"Oh… yeah… yeah you have me there, yep, m-hm, yep, you're right, completely right, yeah- NO! NO YOU FUCKING DON'T!" She shrieked, glaring at everyone with daggers.
"NONE OF YOU UNDERSTAND WHAT I'M GOING THROUGH! NONE OF YOU!"
"Now, see here Miss Morgendorffer!" Mrs. Li suddenly intervened as O'Neill seemed to burst into tears along with Jodie and Brittany, "We've all lost someone who we loved but that gives you no excuse for this kind of anti-social behaviour! I can deal with you sulking around, shunning people but to outright-!"
"FINE!" Daria screamed, throwing her fist onto the counter "Who has lost someone close to them!?" Several hands went up.
"Fine! How many of you lost someone who you could tell anything too?! Who you trusted more than anyone else?! Who would listen to all of your secrets, desires and hopes?! No matter how stupid or unrealistic?! Who loved you no matter what?! Who you felt like you couldn't live without?! Who, when they are gone, leave such a huge void in you, you think it will never be filled and you will always be left with it?! Who told you that life is worth living when you admit to wanting to kill yourself MORE THAN ONCE?! How many, HOW MANY OF YOU HAVE LOST ANYONE LIKE THIS!? GIVE ME ONE PERSON AND I'LL TAKE EVERYTHING BACK!"
Daria looked around. Nothing. They were all staring at her with a mix of sympathy, fright, and rather disturbed emotions. Most were staring at their feet or at the ceiling.
"I THOUGHT SO! YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT I'M GOING THROUGH! NOT! ONE! OF YOU!"
She turned to the students, "YOU MORONS LOST A CLASSMATE!"
She then turned to the teachers, "AND YOU BASTARDS LOST A STUDENT! YOU ALL LOST A PERSON! A BODY! SOMEONE YOU JUST SEE EVERY DAY IN SCHOOL BUT BARELY AKNOWLEDGE! I LOST… I…" her voice trailed as hot tears began to river down her face and slumped in her posture, with one arm wrapped around her torso. "I lost… I lost my best friend… I lost my soulmate…"
Everyone was silent. Awestruck. Many didn't know what to think. They just stared at her. The whole room was silent. Daria sighed shakily as she tried to stand up, but needed the counter for support. But just as she got onto her feet, a horrible churning sound erupted from her stomach and she gagged, putting a hand to her hand.
"Hey, everyone I just- WHAT?!" Trent's pitch rose at the sight of Daria, on her hands and knees and vomiting, rather violently, on the floor. He shot over, putting his arm around her waist and stroking her back.
"What the hell happened?!" he demanded to the crowd. Everyone spluttered as they tried to explain, but his attention was broken as Daria groaned and rolled onto her back. She was now pale, shaking, and still sobbing.
"Shhh…" Trent shushed, dragging her onto her feet, "Come on." He put his arm around her and –shooting a glare at the crowd- half led, half carried Daria towards the door of the bar. Nobody said anything. What could they say?
"I'm really sorry, Daria, I shouldn't have left. I could have done something…"
"N-No… I didn't mean…"
"Don't be sorry. It's not your fault. They should have left you alone."
"I-I can't…"
"Shh, it's going to be ok." Trent kept dabbing her forehead with a wet towel. They were now in the Tank, with Daria leant against the wall, Trent was crouched in front of her and still had a firm hold of her. Trent had locked them both in the van, he knew that Daria would appreciate the privacy. And there was no chance of anyone coming in to upset her any further. They of all people should have known not to provoke her like that, he found it better to leave her alone until she decided to come around on her own terms.
"I don't… It won't…"
"I understand, Daria… I do."
"NO!" Daria's shout made him jump, but she felt too sick to continue. "N-No… you don't…" She leant against the wall, rubbing her head with her right hand, groaning at the thumping pain, "…Nobody does."
Trent sighed and shut his eyes, putting his head back. "…Ok… ok." He pulled her closer to him and stroked her hair, choosing his words carefully, "…Daria, I'll never know how you feel… but… "
She kept silent.
"….Janie wouldn't want you to be like this… You know that, right?"
Still silence.
"Daria…?" Trent sighed at her lack of a response and went to turn away.
"It's just…" She suddenly spoke up "Since she's been gone… Some days I don't know if I'm wrong or right… to feel like this…"
"Your mind is playing tricks on you. It will happen. But it will stop… with time."
"Just… having no-one to talk to about my problems… or give me advice… I mean, there are days when I don't even trust myself to say anything to anyone. Because…" she sighed heavily "…that would happen."
"It's killing me to see you this way."
"I miss our talks… our little talks… when I would tell her everything. All of my insecurities and desires, all these things I could never tell anyone else. The fact that… no matter what I said, she wouldn't laugh or make fun of me. And I would do the same for her…"
"I know." Trent said, bluntly. "…I sometimes overheard you two. You know… I have to say, I've never seen Janie happier than when she was with you."
"…She was?"
"Yeah… she loved your little talks. She wouldn't tell me anything but she always seemed content afterwards. And whatever made Jane happy, meant I was happy."
Daria crossed her legs, grabbing onto a bucket which she held in front of her. Couldn't be too careful.
"I want them back. Our little talks. But… no one will listen. Not after what I just did…"
"From what you told me, they don't sound like it. Just assuming that Jane was just as important to them as she was to you. That isn't right, they're all the same."
"But… you aren't." Daria looked him in the eye, "I mean… you're listening to me."
"Of course I am. I love you, Daria." He smiled and flicked her dishevelled hair out of her face, "Don't listen to a word they say. Their screams all sound the same. I doubt they would understand, even if they did listen."
"…I love you too, Trent." Daria leant into him as she said this. Feeling, for the first time in at least two weeks, comfortable and at ease.
After a few moments, Trent gently pulled away, putting his hand under her chin to lift her head.
"She meant so much to you. And you meant so much to her. She loved you! And… I just want you to know that I will be here. At all times. If you need me for anything, just call and I'll be there. Always. And… I don't care how long it takes. However long it takes for you to fully recover from this. And that's a promise."
Daria stared at his serious, yet still kind expression. Knowing this was genuine. All she could give him was a small nod in understanding.
"So." He smirked, "How was that 'little talk'? Did it help?"
She let out a small gasp and threw her arms around Trent, slightly surprising him but after a few moments –despite her stinking of beer and vomit- closed his arms around her tightly. And as he did, he heard her whisper:
"…That's all I really wanted…"