The most beautiful part of writing this fic: when I first typed "Sealand", Word told me it was misspelled. When I looked it up on Word's handy-dandy dictionary, it didn't list it as the country. Looks like even Word doesn't acknowledge the poor kid as a country. XD

Also, I apologize in advance for calling the characters by their country names. I'm such a backwater kid that I don't know anyone's names but Alfred (GO USA!), Arthur, Ludwig, Matthew, and Honda. And I just know Japan's because he's a car here in America. I apologize for the accents in this fic as well- although I can assure you they're authentic, since half of my family speak with these accents. Yeah, I grew up in a hicktown. Ya'll got a problem with that?

So! Happy Independence Day to all you Americans!

*posts story, then runs outside to light fireworks like a crazy pyromaniac*

Happy Birthday, Dad!

July 4th, at a special, anonymously planned UN meeting….

"What's wrong with you now, Britain? Have a bad day with France or Sealand?"

Europe's worst chef irritably looked up at Germany who, as always, tried to be the only rational one during UN meetings such as this one. The meeting hadn't started yet on account of some countries being late. It was odd, this particular meeting, because no one knew who had sent out the email to gather. Britain, of course, knew for sure.

The culprit had to be that despicable America, wanting to gloat about his independence to the world. It was July 4th, the day that forever burned itself into Britain's mind as his greatest failure.

Britain moaned and dropped his head on the table. "Don't wanna talk about it."

Germany shrugged and immediately turned to yell at Italy for hitting on Belgium again. However, the blonde was totally ignoring them both, engaged in a rousing conversation about waffles and pancakes with Canada.

But there was one thing Britain found confusing about this day: if America had called everyone to gloat, why wasn't he present? It wasn't like him at all to stay out of the way, especially when it concerned him.

Britain rolled his eyes. The idiot had probably blown himself up with a stray firework or something. The idiot.

As more countries filed in, the noise in the room increased to the usual ear-splitting octave. Still no America. Britain narrowed his eyes at the door. America was waiting for the meeting to start. Then, he'd burst in with that obnoxious laugh of his and starting annoying them all with a stupid monologue recounting how heroic he had been on the day in 1776.

"Declaration of Independence- what a stupid name for a stupid parchment. And stupid John Hancock! My eyesight was not so bad that I couldn't see the little bugger's name…."

Germany suddenly blew a shrill whistle, getting everyone's attention. Once the room had quieted a considerable amount (Greece could still be heard snoring and Korea was still going off about having the rights to own Kitty-Chan or something like with China and Japan), he started the roll.

Still no America.

"Albania?"

"Present!"

Here it comes…. The big oaf in all his stupid glory-

"America?"

Silence.

Germany looked up in confusion, scanning the faces around the table. He finally narrowed his eyes on the man sitting beside Belgium. "America, answer."

Canada groaned. "I'm Canada," he angrily burst in a near whisper.

A nervous whisper picked up in the room. Korea finally shut up about Kitty-Chan and shouted, "America! You here?"

Cuba snorted from his seat beside Canada. "Well, I don't miss the burro feo."

"That wasn't nice!" Spain said with a start. He shook his head and sat back in his seat.

Britain furrowed his bushy eyebrows. Why wasn't he bursting in? Where is he?

All of a sudden, there was a screeching sound of someone slamming on their brakes outside. Britain rushed to the window to see what the commotion was about.

A rusty Ford pick-up truck zoomed into view. America frantically jumped out, not bothering to care that he had just blocked in Italy's bright red Ferrari, and starting racing towards the building. "He's late?" Britain burst in surprise.

Seconds later, America, with his hair still messy and dress shirt wrinkled, burst in. "What's the global crisis!" he shouted, grabbing Britain and shaking him by the shoulders. "Are we under attack by those white aliens again! Did China finally decide to take over the world by putting us all into debt!"

"Calm down!" Britain chided, pulling America off of him. "Nothing's wrong!"

America blinked. "Wh-whut?"

He straightened his glasses and looked out over the crowd of countries. "There's… nothing wrong? Then why the heck did I get an urgent wake-up call from Maryland demanding that I go to the UN meeting?"

"Maryland?" Lithuania asked, confused.

"Ah, my kid. She lives next to my capitol," he explained, reaching for his wallet to pull out a picture. He suddenly caught himself, smacking himself in the forehead. "It's the fourth, isn't it!"

"In our time zone, it's the fifth!" China proudly shouted from the back. He was promptly ignored.

America let out an embarrassed, nervous laugh. "Oooooh, crap, I know what's going on. Everybody, down!"

As soon as he said it, the lights went out and the shades dropped down on every window. A proud, boisterous laugh was heard.

"Oh, Texas," America groaned, somewhere near Britain's ear. "I should've known the kids would pull something today!"

"Goooooood mornin' Earth! I'll bet ya'll've been wonderin' why today's meeting was so hastily arranged!"

"Today is Daddy's birthday and we've planned a big surprise for not only him, but all of you too!"

This time, they could hear America smack his forehead to ground. "California…."

"After the meetin' and the special show, we'll be servin' fried fixins downstairs in the banquet hall. Louisiana and Mississippi will take ya'll's orders."

"West Virginia."

The lights flicked back on. On the other side of the room stood fifty children, a very large caribou and several surfboards and wrapped boxes of presents. America, his face bright red, jumped up first. "Guys! I told you, no big celebrations! I thought we were going to spend my birthday over at Virginia's place shooting off fireworks?" After a moment, he slid over to Tennessee and asked, "The barbecue's still on, right?"

"Wouldn't miss it for the world, Dad," the dark haired boy replied with a thumbs up.

A brown-haired teenager, the eldest among the children, cleared her throat and stepped out in front the mass of siblings. "As Texas and California have already told you all, we have gathered here to celebrate our father's birthday," she addressed the stunned countries. "My name is Virginia, and I've been elected by my siblings to plan and host today's party. Since our father is relatively good friends with most of you (and we decided to invite all you other guys to show that we Americans really aren't all that bad), we thought there would be no greater idea than to have his birthday than here at the UN."

A dark skinned toddler with a pink hibiscus behind her ear wobbled over to America. "Happy Birthday, Daddy!"

Every woman (and Italy) present in the room gushed. America smirked and took Hawaii up in his arms. "Gosh, guys," he laughed. "I'm barely 400, but you're making me feel so old!"

"You're not old," a tall, gangly boy in the back sighed. He suddenly grinned mischievously. "Uncle Britain and Uncle Japan are!"

"I-I am not old, Pennsylvania!" Britain gaped. But America only laughed and gave his son a high-five. Pennsylvania winked at the stuttering Brit. "The old-style churches you built over in my place tell us differently."

"Well, you're father was born in 1607! Before I built those churches!" Britain argued, sending even the other countries into fits of giggles.

Japan only shrugged, not caring if they knew he was old or not. He certainly didn't see why Britain made such a big fuss over his age, anyway.

After a few more friendly jabs at the children's favorite Uncle and a round of singing Happy Birthday to America, the states led the countries down stairs where Louisiana and Mississippi had enlisted France's help with the cooking. Virginia and the Carolina brothers supervised the younger kids while the Dakotas, Nevada, Utah, and Montana seated everyone. Alaska had toddled over to Russia, his previous father. Virginia serenely smiled when Russia sat him up on his lap and scratched his pet caribou's head.

Everything was going perfectly. Cuba sat at the far end of the dining table between Switzerland and Canada- Virginia hoped they could keep him in a sensible mood during the party. France doted on and praised Louisiana's cooking skills all night, and Italy, France, and New York were already discussing this year's biggest fashion show. California and Poland (despite the many attempts from Oregon and Washington to keep the two apart) were destroying each other's precious few brain cells.

"Wait- Uncle Britain!"

Britain paused on his way to his seat. Delaware rushed up to him and took his arm. "You get to sit up at the top of the table with Dad," he said, pulling him back.

"What? Why?"

"Because you deserve it," Virginia said with a grin. She pulled out his chair for him, right beside a surprised America. Virginia hugged them both. "You're family, even today- and especially back in 1776. You were more like a father than a brother to Dad, you know? And at some point, every child has to grow up."

America cocked an eyebrow up at his daughter. "What are you asking for, Virginia?"

She blushed. "W-well, Dad, actually…."

Texas rushed up to America and fell on his knees. "Please, Dad!"

"I already told you, Texas, no! If you try to build another ranch on Mexico's land, I'll get in big trouble with my boss!"

"Come on, you can reason with Obama!"

"No, Texas. And besides, one more year until election time again, and we have no idea if Bush is going to make a come back…."

Britain shook his head whilst they argued. Here he had thought America was the worst parent in the world. But… looking around, every one of his children were bright and unique. They each were brimming over with energy and personality- especially little Hawaii who toddled over to every adult in the room, demanding they pick her up and carry her over to where she wanted to be, all the while wearing a carefree smile.

Seeing them almost erased the regret for this day so many years ago. What was he thinking, trying to keep someone as free-spirited as America tied down to British rule? From the very start he had known America would leave him to pursue his own dreams and ambitions.

Suddenly, Virginia hugged Britain again. "I wasn't just saying that for Texas, Uncle Britain."

He smiled and patted her arm. "I know. How about you sit down and eat with us? Maybe then we can set off a firework or two outside."

Suddenly, America and the states went deathly silent. Then, with one simultaneous, wide grin, they bellowed, "WHOOOOO! FIREWORKS!"

Technically, Delaware was the first state and the true eldest among America's fifty states. However, since a lot of the hullabaloo happened in Virginia first, I decided to make her the eldest.

Quick history time for anyone out of the states: Alaska used to be a territory of Russia's until 1950 when America bought it from them. Louisiana and Mississippi were occupied by the French until the Louisiana purchase (which relinquished almost half of our country from the French to America). New Mexico, Arizona, Hawaii, and Alaska were the last four states to be admitted into the United states, and thus they are they youngest. The Carolinas (North and South) are brothers in allusion towards the Wright Brothers, who first invented the plane.

And if you want to know anymore, there's a lovely thing called Google….

Happy Independence Day!