Title: Femme Fatale
Author: Jmaria
Rating: PG-13 for language and drinking
Disclaimer: not mine, Joss and JK own all
Spoilers: Set five years after book seven, and a year after season seven
Summary: She's sick and tired of the way Harry's been treating her, and needs a little spice in her life. She turns to one of her old school mates for a little spell to make him see her in a different light . . . only it kinda backfires.
A/N: You can totally blame my film/lit class for this little doozy, cause I basically worked it out all in my head while watching Double Indemnity (although, it isn't anything like that movie) Hope you all like!
Femme Fatale
Least Unlikely Bombshell
The sun set on 12 Grimmauld Place just like any other day, except that it wasn't just any old day. She was rather distressed, to put it politely. To put it not so politely, she was completely and totally irritated by that stupid wanker, Harry Potter. He was just - gah! She couldn't even say it.
If it had been the first time, well then she'd be her typical self and blow it off, but no. It was the umpteenth time that he'd blown her off, and it was their anniversary. Two years of solid commitment to each other, two bleedin' years of hand holding, and kissing and well, what she thought of as love. Cause, she did love that stupid, pea brained - man. No, he was an idiotic little boy, who barely noticed his girlfriend wasn't even speaking to him. Two days, she hadn't said a word to him, and he hadn't even noticed.
And that was the shit-kicker. He was too wrapped up in work to even notice that the girl he'd been with for two years wasn't speaking to him.
"Han, you in here?" He called.
She'd been standing at the kitchen counter, overseeing the dinner she'd planned for weeks. She watched as the butter melted in the pan. It was exactly like the dinner they'd had on their first actual date. Breakfast. She'd been working late, and so had he. They bumped into each other on their respective ways home, and when her stomach growled, he asked her to breakfast. They'd stopped at a little Muggle diner and ordered eggs, bacon, wheat toast, and hot chocolate. A week later, he'd asked her out again. But today, she ignored him.
"That was Luna in the fire. She, Neville, and Ron stumbled on a lead in a case. I - I'm headed out."
"Of course."
He pecked her on the cheek and disappeared with a very annoying pop. She brushed an angry tear from her eye before whispering the ending charm on the pan. Snatching up her jacket, she grabbed a pinch of Floo Powder. Tossing it into the kitchen fireplace, she yelled "Madame Patil's Potion Shop", and stuck her head in.
"Madame Patil's Potion Shop, home of the finest Witches beauty potions -" The dark-eyed woman said in an accent that was about as realistic as a frog doing the Polka.
"Hullo Parvati, is it a good time to talk?"
"Hannah!" She squealed. "Of course. It's my slow day, why don't you come on in?"
"Thanks."
Within moments, Hannah was in the heavily draped showroom of Parvati's Cosmetic Potion Shop. Parvati had never been one of Hannah's close friends. She'd been a Gryffindor, and Hannah had been a Hufflepuff in school. But now, five years after the defeat of Lord Voldemort, and the war that they had all taken part in, things like that didn't seem to matter as much. The fact that she'd managed to snag the overly reclusive Harry Potter was just a bonus.
"What he do now?"
"Who?"
"Harry, of course. Ginny was in here a few days ago, telling me and Lavender all about the big anniversary you'd had planned." Parvati sighed. "Today was your anniversary."
Ginny was a lovely girl, and Hannah had no major qualms with her. Except that she was a huge reminder of why Hannah couldn't seem to hold Harry's attention. That and the fact that the girl was her boyfriend's ex and still one of his close friends didn't help much.
"Ginny would know. She spends more time with him than I do. Perhaps if I were a bouncy, happy red-head, I could keep -" By now tears were streaking down her face. "My boyfriend interested in me!" She sobbed, dropping down onto one of the overstuffed velvet chairs.
"Oh, Han, he wasn't that idiotic, was he?"
"He left to go work on a case - before we even had dinner!" She cried, brushing tears from her cheeks. "I need a spell, Parvati."
"I'm not giving you a spell to ruin that perfectly beautiful head of blonde hair, Hannah Abbot, so get that thought out of your mind. You know Harry doesn't fancy Ginny because of her red hair, and you haven't the coloring to pull it off." Parvati sighed.
"No, Harry fancies her cause she went out with Malfoy not three months ago and hasn't stopped yet." Hannah snorted. "Sides, I don't want red hair, and I'm not quite sure I want stupid Harry Potter anymore either."
"Han, don't say such things like that! You know Harry loves you -"
"No, I'm not quite sure I do." She whispered. "He spends his time wrapped up in work and spends more time with Ginny, Luna, and Hermione than he does with me. He's the one who asked me to move in with him. But he's never there, for all I know he could be sleeping with one of them."
"First off, Ginny's with Draco, Neville and Luna just got married, and Hermione and Ron are expecting their first any day now!" Parvati sighed again. "We told you - Lavender, Susan, Padma, and I - that no girl's been able to accept Harry before you. Merlin, he's never even kept a girlfriend as long as you two have been together. Luna lasted a month, Hermione a week, and Ginny three weeks. The four of us lasted only three weeks combined, and Cho - well that one was doomed before it even started."
"Yeah, well I'm starting to think they noticed the same distance he put between us like he probably put between them, and were smart enough to not put up with it."
"Hannah. . ."
"So I need a spell." Hannah sighed.
"I work in cheap cosmetic spells, Hannah, not -"
"I need a spell to make me - be more than plain old pigtailed Hannah Abbot, the nice sweet Hufflepuff, and I'm going out. If Harry can't get over his old crushes or flings and notice me, I'm sure someone else will."
"Are you thinking of cheating on Harry?" Parvati asked tentatively.
"Maybe I am." Hannah said softly.
Parvati's heart broke just a little. Hannah had seemed so right for Harry, so very accepting of all that had happened to him. She never pushed at him like the rest of them had. But she could also understand why Hannah was so frustrated. Harry kept to himself, and kept a lot of what happened in his life private just that - private. There wasn't a doubt in her mind that Harry loved Hannah, but there also wasn't a doubt in her mind that Hannah couldn't feel it coming from him. Because only Hannah's uncertainty would drive her to take such drastic steps.
"There's a spell," Parvati said slowly. "An emboldening spell, with cosmetic features. It'll take you out of your ordinary shoes, and for twenty-four hours, make you even more extraordinary." She scribbled down the incantation on a piece of pink parchment. She then reached below the counter and pulled out a small pouch. "Mix these with cool water then well, say the incantation and gulp it down. Then, meet me at this club."
"A Muggle club?"
"Lavender and I always go there. Meet us at seven, outside the club."
"Thanks Parvati."
Parvati hugged her good-bye and waited ten minutes before she grabbed a pinch of Floo powder and called out Susan, Padma, and Lavender's homes.
"We've got a problem, girls and his name is Harry bleedin' Potter." She sighed.
Hannah got ready to leave at six thirty that night. She quickly did the charm and felt an instant change ripple through her. Her normally straight dark blonde hair curled up in vibrant golden ringlets that came just below her jaw. Her blue eyes sparkled with dark golden eye shadow and her eyelashes were elongated. Her cheeks wore golden pink blush that made her pale skin seem to glow, and her skin was slightly tanned. Her lips were painted a sultry color that she would never even have dared to wear before now. Her clothing were altered as well. She wore a dark golden top, cropped short and with a plunging neckline, and a dangerously short skirt of dark beige leather. Ridiculously high heals of the same material covered her feet. Then she apparated to the club.
She quickly found Parvati, Padma, Lavender and Susan dressed similarly and waiting in line to get into the club. Parvati waved her over.
"Hannah?" Susan cried, embracing her old friend. "I - wow."
"You look absolutely ravishing, Han!" Lavender squealed. "She's a knockout!"
"You get to keep the clothes, in case you were wondering, Han." Parvati told her. "They stay after the spell ends, but the rest vanishes just like normal cosmetic spells."
"Good to know. Although, it'd be mighty interesting finding yourself stark naked on the streets of London." Hannah grinned.
"Hannah!" Susan gasped.
"What are we waiting for?" Hannah asked.
"For the club to open," Padma replied.
"Boring," Hannah sighed.
When they finally got it, they were sent drinks by the half dozen by various men in the club. When the music finally started, Hannah was on the floor for every song, dancing the night away. It was around ten thirty when she bumped into a tall man, and as she was not completely clear headed or able to walk in her shoes at that point, she fell into him.
"You ok?"
"Well, I'm getting better." She looked up into the man's face and grinned, "Much better."
"Well, glad to hear it."
"Care for a drink? Least I can do." She smiled.
He had dark hair, and an American accent. He was strong, and tall, and had a dashing smile. But he only had one eye. And that made him dangerous and sexy.
"Sure, why not?"
"I'm Hannah Abbot." She grinned.
"Xander Harris. Nice to meet you, Hannah."
They spent the next two hours dancing, talking, and drinking. And when her friends were ready to go, Hannah was nowhere to be found.
"She was with a dark haired man -" Susan said, "But I don't see her now."
"Maybe Harry found her in this crush." Lavender replied hopefully.
"No, Harry didn't find her because he's right behind you," Parvati cried. "Where were you, Potter?"
"Trying to find this stupid place. Where's Hannah?" He demanded.
"Well, it's like this. . ." Parvati started.
Hannah stumbled into the room with Xander, prepared to sleep with a man who wasn't important to her. But every time she kissed him, her mind screamed It's not Harry! She pulled away from him, tears in her eyes.
"I - I can't." She whispered.
"I figured as much." He replied.
"Then why did you - you wanted me, though. I could tell." Hannah cried. "And I thought I wanted to - but I'm with someone. And you - well, you sort of reminded me of him."
"You sort of reminded me of my girlfriend." He whispered.
"What? You have a girlfriend! What a horrible -" Hannah stopped herself, realizing she'd nearly done the very same thing.
"Anya - my girlfriend - she died a few months back. But I get the feeling that your guy isn't - so why with the barhopping and flirting with strangers?"
"Harry, my boyfriend, has been distant lately, and I think he doesn't love me anymore." She sobbed, "I'm not like his old girlfriends, not pretty or clever, or fiery enough for him to even remember that today was our anniversary. I - just wanted to - I don't know, maybe try to be outrageous, for just once." She sighed. "I tried to forget about him, but all night I wished he was with me."
"Have you tried to talk to him? Cause, sometimes guys can be boneheads."
"He's always too busy."
"If you really love him, and if he really loves you, he can never be too busy."
"I -"
"C'mon, I'll drive you home." Xander said softly.
Hannah slipped into 12 Grimmauld Place early the next morning, her clubbing clothes still on, and the cosmetic charms still in place. She tiptoed into the main room, tossing her bag on the sofa. As her handbag hit the sofa, a pained groan answered. She was shocked to see Harry bolt upright off the sofa.
"Harry? What in the blazes are you doing there?" He bounded over the sofa and grabbed her by the shoulders.
"What the blazes am I doing? Do you know how worried I've been? I -" He stopped, looking down at her outfit. "Hannah, I was at the club last night." He whispered. "I know you left with another man, Hannah." His voice was painfully tight.
"You were at the club? Why?"
"Why? Parvati tracks me down and says my girlfriend's so upset with me that she's gonna do something rash, and if I want to save my relationship I better haul ass over to this Muggle club. So I run, only to find out I'm too late, my girl's already left with a guy who's smart enough to -" He stopped, blinking back tears of anger, "Did you sleep with him, Hannah?"
"No! No, I didn't. We talked. He - he lost his girlfriend, and I couldn't stop thinking about you." She whispered. "We need to talk Harry, because you - you forgot that I'm important. I never forgot how - two days Harry! Two days, I didn't say a word to you, and you didn't even notice, Harry! I'm not Ginny, or any of the other girls. I'm just plain Hannah. . . " She took a deep breath and looked up into his eyes. "You forgot one of the best days of my life, and went to work."
"I didn't forget, Hannah."
"No, because Parvati told you!" she cried.
"I knew you had a dinner planned."
"Then why did you rush off? If you knew I had plans for tonight, why did you leave?"
"Because I needed to pick up this." He drew a small package from his pocket, and quickly dropped to his knees. "I rushed out to pick up this. I was going to ask you to marry me, Hannah. After the big dinner you had planned. Luna was holding it for me. Ron would have blabbed, and well, I wanted to surprise you. But you were already gone, and well, I - Parvati got hold of me, and told me." Harry gently pulled her hand to his heart. "I can't bear to lose the best thing that's ever happened to me. Please give me - don't tell me that I've screwed it all up. I love you. Marry me, Hannah?"
"Harry - I - yes." She burst into tears, pulling him up. "You big stupid wanker, I was so afraid you didn't love me anymore, because I'm not fiery, or beautiful enough."
"You the most wonderful thing that's ever happened to me." He murmured, kissing her.
Xander pulled back into his parking space just as Willow and Buffy were coming out of the flat they shared with Dawn and himself.
"Hey, Xan, you disappeared on us last night." Buffy grinned, "So, have fun?"
"I met a girl who reminded me of Anya." He said, catching the worried looks from his two closest friends. "But she wasn't Anya, and I wasn't her Harry, and we talked, she cried and I drove her home."
"Xander, that's kinda sweet." Buffy smiled.
"Kinda like a white knight, protecting an innocent girl and making sure she got home safe."
"'Sides, I'm not sure I'm ready to move on to one night stands." He frowned, "And Hey! no stupid -"
"Xan, don't fight it. You are the Champion Heart Mender. It's a gift." Willow giggled.
"Great."
"Into every generation, a Heart Mender is born -" Buffy quipped.
"He alone can mend a heart in a single bound.." Willow followed.
"Isn't that Superman?" He asked.
"Shush, we're giving you a shtick."
As the sun rose on 12 Grimmauld Place, it's inhabitants were just going to bed. And Hannah didn't have to worry about her clothes disappearing when the spell ended, because they were already balled in a corner.
A/N: So, what do you think?