My first English fic. It's a translation from one of my fics in Spanish. I did it alone sooo be kind.
Hope you like it and forgive my grammar mistakes.
Disclaimer: I don't own Castle or its characters.
Lonely hours
Oh, sweet love, what have we done? We've broken down again.
The first shot passed through his throat like it had small thorns that hurt him immediately. He tried to cough twice to take away the burning sensation but the next shot was already poured. Beckett looked at him with a mixture of doubt and grief before putting the drink to her lips and swallowed in one whack the amber liquid that had the same effect on her throat.
Pathetic. Two successful adults, which could've had a fulfilling life and a prosperous marriage, drinking to fall into the disgraceful effects of the alcohol instead of dealing with their problems.
It was really pathetic their way to avoid the extremely important and sensitive subject that, at that moment, defined their relationship. And that subject wasn't LokSat.
Rick concluded that their lives were a real mess. Beyond their professional life, they were a mess.
Where all the streets are over run with lies that never end.
How much longer could they handle that situation? How much longer should they have to hide their relationship from the world just because they don't have the courage to join forces to close the chapter?
Trying not to make a big deal about it, Rick drank again getting used to the thorns of the alcohol on his throat. Beckett refilled the glasses almost immediately.
"To protect you", he had said. And he knew that phrase very well. It was the phrase that had been repeated in the last 7 years, and despite the problems it had caused to them, was still there. And probably, will be forever.
They'll tie us down and lift us up for everyone to see.
After a couple of drinks later, in silence, standing face to face, they decided to take the bottle and the glasses to the couch, where they sat as close as they could. Castle wrapped his arm around her shoulder and pulled her to his chest, drinking from the glass again. The alcohol had already started to show its effect on them. Their thoughts had been displaced to focus on the warmth of their bodies pressed up against each other.
Weakness and strength. Together. Alone. And yet so vulnerable.
Revealing all our darkest truths we've tried so hard to keep.
Beckett poured the next round, no hurry, and drank hers without even realizing that swallow didn't hurt anymore. She wasn't sure how strong the drink she was pouring was but could swear that she had seen an 80 somewhere on the bottle.
She didn't care. A few shots more and she knew she would forget which had taken her to that situation in the first place: knowing that everything she thought it was her fault, were just the repercussions of the actions of someone else.
Of Castle.
But she didn't blame him, because she knew his intentions were pure and was him who always protected her.
From herself.
When all the lights are out we'll have to face this world alone.
It wasn't the first time she drank to forget the darkness that consumed her inside. Only this time was different.
This time, she wasn't alone.
She was sharing the darkness with the man she loved more than anything and who, in that moment, was with her in her weak moment. In solemn silence. What better company than the man that knew all her secrets? Castle was the only person who knew her from head to toe and understood her perhaps unhealthy obsession with protecting the people she loved.
With no one there to hold our hand our bodies turn to stone.
A new bottle was open and not long after, the glasses were filled to continue the mission they had: to forget.
It was just the two of them on their own. And they needed to stay strong.
There's monsters deep inside of us. They're killing us to breathe.
She put her feet up on the couch and cuddled against Castle's chest a little bit more, trying to get closer, finding a perhaps false feeling of peace. She knew, when she woke up in the morning –besides the hungover– she would be afraid again and her senses would be alert.
And watch them take a hold of us and kill us while we sleep.
I was Kate who took the initiative to put the glass down. She removed Rick's glass from his lips and left it next to hers on the coffee table, returning to her cozy and snug position on Castle's arms.
Despite all the alcohol they drank, none of them felt tired. Actually, the need of kissing led to a battle of lips and tongues that let them panting almost instantly.
They weren't going to let the ups and downs destroy them. They weren't going to let their guard down against LokSat or against themselves.
They may break my heart this time, but my body will survive.
Both shirts disappeared in a matter of seconds and they kissed again as their hands traveled up and down their bodies in a desperate attempt of trying to hold onto something real. Something that wouldn't let them plunge into the mist and emptiness of fighting their demons.
Kate ran her hands down his bare chest, looking into his eyes with a mixture of lust and love, unzipping her bra with a skilled move.
Oh, sweet lover, can you see me, washing away all our sins?
And, as he had done years ago, brought his lips to that scar that was always with her, just in the valley between her breasts –the scar that reminded her not to stop fighting– and deposited a warm kiss there. She felt herself shudder and arched her back looking for greater contact.
He held her hips and drew her close to him. His lips locked with hers again. Not impressed with the synchronization which they did that dance.
In our darkest lonely hours, we learn to forget and forgive.
Inspired by the alcohol and guided by the softness of their skin, they realized that could work better together than being under the punishment of separation. Kate knew that no matter how hard she tried, she would never feel complete if he wasn't by her side.
And Castle knew that he would just never stop believing in their relationship. In what they had and which has taken so much work to build.
Because, despite all the ways that there would have been, every single one led to the same place: to each other.
I will love you, again and again.
The song is "Lonely Hours" by Mallory Knox.
God, please, I wanna know what you think about this!