Minutes ticked by slowly in Colonel Mustang's office, and Edward was bored. And hungry. The blonde sighed and looked up at the clock to see how long until Roy went on his lunch break. He still had twenty minutes.

After another ten minutes, Ed sighed again and looked up. Everyone was still doing their paperwork, but Roy seemed to be almost done.

"Roy?" Ed asked his boyfriend. "Roooy?"

"Wait a minute Edward." Roy said. "I'm almost done."

Two minutes later, Ed asked again: "Roooooyyyy?" He drew the word out and made a cute puppy face, but Roy didn't even look up. The man just held up a finger to tell him to wait.

Ed consented to wait for five more minutes, then he whined: "Rooyyy!"

Mustang sighed through his nose, then continued with his work. Ed pouted and then got an idea. He made the cute face again and curled up. Ed put one hand protectively on his stomach and quietly, in a voice that sounded close to tears, said: "Roy... I'm pregnant."

Havoc, Falman, and Breada all snapped their pens in surprise, poor Feury fainted and Roy went stock-still. Riza was the only one who continued working, although she did raise an eyebrow and shake her head.

Roy set his pen down and stood up. He quietly crossed the room to sit beside Ed on the couch and pulled his blonde uke into a hug. "I'm sorry I did this to you!" he whispered. "I know we never agreed to have a baby, but since we're going to have on now, I want you to know that I'm going to be right here for you, ok? I'll do everything I can for you and our child."

Minus Hawkeye and Feury, the subordinates all began yelling at Roy at once.

"You knocked him up?!"

"The legal age is sixteen, idiot! How will everyone react when they find out you got a fifteen year old pregnant?!"

"Sir, I find your actions highly irresponsible."

The colonel bit his lip and held Ed a little tighter. "I didn't mean to, but I'm going to take full resposibility for my actions." he told them.

Ed face-palmed and sighed. "Roy..."

"What's wrong? Do you feel sick?" Roy asked. He mistook the hand over the boy's face to be there in pain; he didn't realize it was exasperation.

"... I'm a boy. I can't get pregnant. I just wanted attention and a sandwich." Edward said.

Roy's jaw almost hit the top of the blonde's head, then the man said: "You're... not pregnant?"

"No, I'm not! I'm hungry!"

Mustang stood back up and picked his coat up. He slung it on and looked at everyone in the office. "I'm going to go get Ed lunch. I'll be back."

Ed frowned and straightened up. Had Roy looked... disappointed?... when Ed told him there was no baby? The blonde just shoved his thoughts to the back of his mind and eagerly awaited his sandwich.