Heyyyyyyy guys! This is gunna be either really dark to you or really deep... hell maybe both? I don't know if you peepz will be able to relate to any of the emotions on here, but either way I hope you enjoy~ The lyrics to 'Given Up' by Linkin Park are in bold, I do not own those in any way shape or form. I used the lyrics to help explain the emotions. The regular fonted words however, are my creation~ Without further a-do~~~ Enjoy~
Wake in a sweat again
Another day's been laid to waste
In my disgrace
My life was lived in darkness, all my life. There had always been a light though, but in later years, that light has begun to flicker. Resent days, that light has started going out, for hours at a time.
Stuck in my head again
Feels like I'll never leave this place
There's no escape
Now, I am in darkness again. The cold stone floor and walls the only familiar things that bring me comfort. They are walls that protect me. Protecting me from the pain others can bring. Pain, that has come again and again. Pain, of which I just can't take.
I'm my own worst enemy
It always happens. Like the gofer that takes its' first steps outside, wondering if his shadow is waiting. My shadow, is my life. My shadow, is the darkness and the light. It will never leave me, the source is always the same, though the form will always change.
I've given up
I'm sick of feeling
Is there nothing you can say
Take this all away
I'm suffocating
Tell me what the fuck is wrong
With me
What is the point of coming out, when I know my shadow is there. Just waiting, watching. Why? Why even bother. I know what is waiting for me, I know that it is my own fault, yet why do I keep doing this? Why do I keep letting myself get hurt? Why can't I just have a break. Even here, inside these walls of my frozen heart, the ice burns. It spreads, freezing my body like fire, though it only burns me with ice. Cold, hard, lifeless , ice.
I don't know what to take
Thought I was focused but I'm scared
I'm not prepared
I hyperventilate
Looking for help somehow somewhere
And no one cares
I don't mean to be like this…. I have picked myself up so many times. More times than I can remember… But I always get knocked down. Harder than the last time. It is hard to stand on broken legs. It is hard to be strong with a crippled spine. It is hard to move on with a shattered soul.
I'm my own worst enemy
Why am I so weak?
I've given up
I'm sick of feeling
Is there nothing you can say
Take this all away
I'm suffocating
Tell me what the fuck is wrong
With me
Everyday my walls seem to shrink around me. Pressing down like a fate I cannot change. A slow one. A painful one. Where I see the problem but I have no solution.
Goddddddd!
Put me out of my misery
Put me out of my misery
Put me out of my
Put me out of my fucking misery
What horrible actions in another life could I have done to deserve the horror I have gotten in this life? What unforgivable sin have I committed? Maybe the pain isn't my punishment, but living is. Being too weak to just end the pain. I guess there is a solution after all, death. Sad thing is, it isn't the solution I want. I am not strong enough for that. I'm too weak.
I've given up
I'm sick of feeling
Is there nothing you can say
Take this all away
I'm suffocating
Tell me what the fuck is wrong
With me
I just want this to be over! I just want someone to tell me it isn't me! That I am going to be okay! I just want someone to make me feel safe, protected, loved… Feelings I have never felt before. I never felt safe. Or loved. Or protected. I never felt wanted, or needed, or even liked. All I have felt was the emptiness inside me. Emptiness that is spreading. I don't know how to stop it! I don't know what to do… I just want someone to help me.