A/N: Made some updates to the 1st and 2nd chapters on 10/21/2014.
Further and further the dark tunnels went, snaking around and twisting back on themselves. Pipes and cables lined the walls and ceiling, and the sound of dripping water was omnipresent. These weren't mere sewers, but a sprawling labyrinth of catacombs. Here, there was a multitude of places to hide, if one so desired. But that wouldn't save Envy from the horrible fate he ran from.
No matter how far he ran, no matter where he hid, Mustang would find him and Dear God the burning! He'd had the vitreous humor of his eyeballs boiled off, his tongue reduced to ash, and to top it all off, his body was flammable. If he'd been a skilled fighter, he might've been able to last, but he wasn't even a fighter to begin with: he was a spy and an assassin. Unfortunately as of late, he'd been forced into increasingly ill-suited roles. Maybe Mustang would've spared him if he'd explained that he was merely following orders. But no, he'd had to gloat about killing Maes Hughes. Now it was too late to realize his mistakes. Mustang had killed Lust without an ounce of pity, and she hadn't been needlessly malicious like Envy was. He needed to find Father, and fast. Father could help him, could save him. The fire-spewing worm didn't stand a chance against—
Wait a second… What was that green flash? More importantly, when did he appear a hundred feet above the ground on a sunny day?
Louise simply stared with half-lidded eyes when the summoning spell simply failed to work the first two tries. It was odd that she hadn't made an explosion already, but part of her was glad she hadn't botched the ritual that badly. But if she didn't succeed in this, then she'd have to leave the school and her family's sight forever. She would—
Someone tittered.
That was it! She wasn't going to just sit down and be the laughing stock of the school. Screaming obscenities and blasphemies and prayers alike inside her head, she spoke the words of power she devised herself.
Oh mighty pentacle blah blah I summon from my heart blah blah mighty familiar blah blah some other stuff blah blah and by Brimr this will work or so help me I will raze the mighty civilizations of Halkegenia unto dust!
She'd show them, she'd show them all! And no one would ever make fun of—The explosion was nothing less than breathtaking. Literally, as in people couldn't breathe with the smoke blocking their airways. Louise, somehow, was not inconvenienced in the slightest. For a moment, she thought she could hear some kind of whistling noise, and then a tremendous thump. The ground actually shook in that instant. Walking closer to the source of the thump, she could make out a figure. When the smoke cleared momentarily, the rest of her classmates still hacking and coughing, her hopes were realized… and dashed.
She'd summoned a commoner (unconscious, obviously), and not just any commoner, but some kind of jester or acrobat, judging by his clothes. The long-haired youth was lying in a small crater that conformed to his body shape. Had Louise been paying more attention, she would've noticed that the depth of the depression indicated an amount of force that would've killed any human being who'd fallen from the height required to make it, but the youth was unharmed. Either he was incredibly resistant to damage, or he weighed a lot more than he looked. But none of this occurred to Louise.
Inevitably, the jeers began. Some mocked her familiar's bizarre appearance (even she had to admit that his dreadlocks were reminiscent of certain potted plants or weeds) and others accused her of faking the ritual, while Kirche, her nemesis, was one of the few who acknowledged that she'd actually been able to summon something. A subtle distinction, and one that Louise ignored when she accused Kirche of whatever she could think of at the moment, whether it be using magic to fake her bust size or sleeping around with anything on legs whether they be two or four. The specifics didn't matter.
Louise was interrupted, however, we she heard a groan coming from the formerly unconscious youth. She glanced back to see him sit up, dully looking around in confusion. He rubbed his eyes and said some strange words that she didn't understand, and then sighed and shrugged in what appeared to be relief before falling back into a heap. That only elicited more jeers about language barriers.
"Ms. Valliere, it's time to perform the binding spell," Professor Colbert cut in.
"But Professor," Louise cried indignantly. "I've never heard of anyone summoning a carnie before!"
"Be that as it may, he is still your familiar, and for tradition's sake, you are obligated to bind him to yourself."
Louise sighed and nodded her head meekly. She walked over to the familiar-to-be and nudged him with her foot. He twitched and said something clipped, but otherwise didn't react. So she bent over and forcibly yelled in his face.
"Get up!"
Envy yelped and rose to full height like a wooden plank on a hinge. He rubbed his ears and glared at her, saying something in his language that was obviously not polite, only to be interrupted when his lips locked with hers. Louise pulled back.
"Be glad for that, it's not every day a commoner kisses a noble," she muttered under her breath.
The youth stood ramrod straight, eyes wide open in shock. He glanced down at his hand, and then brought it up to his face, feeling his lips with his fingers. Louise huffed through her nose. Envy glared at her and was about to say something before he started yelping in pain, tripping and falling flat on his bottom.
"Oh stop whining, you big baby," said Louise callously. "That's just the familiar runes branding onto you. It will all be over soon."
His skin started turning a light shade of red, as though he'd been lying in hot water. His back arched once, twice, and then he went limp, breathing heavily. A set of unique runes had branded themselves into the back of his left hand. Professor Colbert raised an eyebrow and walked over to Envy, kneeling down and placing his hand on the new familiar's arm.
"Those runes, may I see them?"
Envy looked up at Colbert, the pupils of his violet eyes narrowed to vertical slits. Rather than receiving an answer, Colbert immediately doubled over in pain, clutching his stomach where Envy had backhanded it.
"Familiar!" Louise screeched in anger.
She pointed her wand at the still-collapsed Envy, and quite predictably, whatever spell she tried to cast instead caused a small explosion.
"What am I going to do with you?" Louise mused aloud.
Envy just stared at her sardonically from his position on the pile of straw that Louise has intended as her familiar's "bed." He wasn't in any position leave, as after his little "demonstration," Louise had clapped his wrists and ankles in irons and dragged his unconscious body up to her room. With assistance from the school's servants, of course, as the boy weighed a couple hundred pounds for reasons no one could discern. As she began to berate him (uselessly, as he couldn't understand a word she was saying), he just sniggered at her. She growled at him and pulled out her wand.
"Argh! Be quiet!"
Yet again, her attempt at a simple silencing spell went horribly awry, filling the room with smoke and debris. Louise sighed and began wiping the soot from her robes.
"You know, if you're trying to beat me, it's not very effective. Your alchemy skills need a bit of work." He gave another snigger.
Louise's eyes widened.
"I understood that!"
"Well, whaddaya know? So can I." There was a beat. "How is that even possible?"
"Magic, of course! Were you raised in a cave?" Louise huffed in annoyance.
"Magic?" Envy laughed, and then glared at her. "Do you think I was born yesterday? There's no such thing as magic. I don't know what weirdo branch of alchemy you practice, but it definitely ain't magic."
"Alchemy? You mean like turning lead into gold?"
That made Envy giggled at her ignorance.
"Something like that," Envy said offhandedly, before rising up.
"Now if you'll excuse me," he said, stretching his limbs and snapping his bonds like twigs, "I have somewhere to be." He turned and walked out the door, leaving Louise sputtering.
"Wait! You can't just leave! You're my familiar, my servant!"
Envy ignored her. He had no interest in dealing with lunatics who believed in medieval witchcraft and demonology.
On his wall through the halls, looking for an exit to this labyrinthine mess of a place, he passed a brunette girl swooning over a blonde poofter in one room and a brunette boy swooning over a redheaded vixen in another. He paid them little mind, but his photographic memory recorded what of their appearances and conversations he briefly witnessed.
Envy managed to make his way outside into some sort of courtyard before he noticed that his surroundings began shifting in height. He looked down to see himself floating off the ground, and the blond-haired poofter standing a few yards behind him, waving a wand. There were a couple other spectators, including the pinkette who harassed him and the redheaded vixen, but none of them interested him. Envy sighed and drew upon his Philosopher's Stone. His weight began increasingly rapidly.
Meanwhile, Guiche de Gramont suddenly began to feel his willpower draining more than before. Sweat began trickling down his brow and his breathing became heavy and labored.
"Jeez Louise, how much does your familiar weigh? He feels like a ton!" the boy wheezed.
Guiche tried to maintain his hold on the green-haired youth, but quickly found himself collapsing in a heap.
Freed of the levitation, Envy landed back on the ground, leaving deep footprints, and kept walking.
Louise just stared at her vanishing familiar. All her hopes and dreams had been ruined. Not only had she summoned a common, but she was so incompetent that he just walked out on her. All she could do now was… Louise fell to her knees, and began to cry. A few moments later, however, she was jolted over her sorrow by that cocky and disrespectful voice.
"What are you so sad about?"
Louise opened her eyes, blinking away tears and she glanced to see her familiar standing before her rather than leaving. Rather than joy, however, Louise began to feel… heated. She glared at the green-haired boy.
"Weren't you just leaving?" she replied haughtily.
Envy just shrugged and plastered his face with an obvious fake smile.
"Well, I was, but then I noticed that I don't recognize any of the constellations and there are two moons in the sky," he said, counting his fingers as he listed the differences. "So you've managed to drag me millions of light years away from where I was supposed to be. Ignoring how any of this is possible, you've left me with nowhere to go and no way to get home."
His eyes narrowed, and then he roughly grabbed her shirt and hauled to her feet, holding her a few inches above the ground.
"Send me back, now!" he yelled.
"Gladly," Louise yelled in return. "But such a spell doesn't exist! So I guess we're both out of luck! Now put me down, you jerk!"
Envy complied, dropping her, and Louise turned her back on him, huffing. He sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. He was alone, trapped on a faraway alien world, with no way of getting back home and only this spell-throwing brat for company.
But he had at least escaped from... from what? Had he been running from something? There was something important, just in the back of his mind, but he couldn't remember what it was. But as the seconds passed, those thoughts quickly faded.
What was he thinking about? Oh right! How was he supposed to function with such limitation?
Then a new thought occurred to Envy, and an insidious look spread across his face.
"If I stay here and become your familiar," he began, "What can you provide me in return?"
Louise turned to him, glaring.
"For your information, I am Louise Françoise Le Blanc de La Vallière, daughter of His Grace the Duke of La Vallière. As rich and beautiful as I am, you should be glad to be of any service to me."
The gears in Envy's mind began turning with this new information. He was now in a privileged position of trust to the daughter of a wealthy and influential nobleman. Outwardly, he smiled and took a bow.
"A pleasure to meet you, Miss Vallière. I am Envy the Jealous, at your service," he finished with false sincerity, offering his hand.
Louise stared at the outstretched limb in confusion, but quickly regained her composure and gave him her own hand. Envy kissed it (while trying not gag), as was customary.
"I'm glad to see you understand the proper way to treat nobility," she said, not suspecting anything strange about his sudden change in demeanor.
"And I'm sure we'll get along just fine young Miss," Envy replied, grinning wickedly.
Back in Louise's quarters as she prepared for bedtime, Envy raised his eyebrows.
"Why are you undressing in front of me?"
Louise glanced at him.
"I'm getting ready for bed, of course."
"That doesn't answer my question. Aren't you embarrassed to be naked in front of me?"
"You're my familiar. Undressing in front of you is like undressing in front of the family dog."
At that point, Envy couldn't restrain himself. He grabbed Louise by the arm. She flinched in confusion.
"You're hurting me," she said, squirming in his iron grip.
"Let me make this clear," he began. "I am not your pet. I am not your slave. I am working with you only because I choose to, and I can leave you at any time I wish. If you want me to work with you, you will treat me with respect, understand?"
Louise looked away, but Envy grabbed her chin with his other hand and forced her to make eye contact.
"Do you understand?" he asked.
"Yes. Please let me go," she replied.
He complied. She turned away and finished dressing into her nightgown. She'd have one of the academy servants take the laundry. Louise wasn't stupid. Envy was utterly unscathed by her trademark explosions, snapped iron chains like they were twigs, and shrugged off a levitation spell somehow. She didn't know how a mere commoner could accomplish such things, but he'd made it clear he wasn't going to let her walk all over him. She couldn't help but wonder if there was more to the oddly-dressed boy than she first thought. At least, he didn't show up under a detect magic spell, so she assumed he was merely a commoner—though in her heart of hearts she suspected this was most certainly not the case. As much as she wished to deny it... she was genuinely afraid of him.
Envy, on the other hand, was thinking about what a self-entitled bitch she was. He had little direct experience with medieval societies, but he had a great deal of historical information. This land was different from what he knew, what with the anachronisms like running water and widespread education for the nobility, but Louise's two-minute crash course in her society didn't tell him much that he didn't already know: the nobility were arrogant twats who oppressed the peasants and waged wars over pointless problems. The only difference was that the nobility here used so-called "magic" as their excuse to rule rather than divine right—though that wasn't to say they didn't use that flimsy justification as well, but as far as the magocrats were concerned the two were synonymous.
Envy slumped down into the pile of hay that Louise had planned to be her familiar's bed. He curled into a ball, not unlike a lizard or a dog, and slowly drifted into a pleasant sleep, full of dreams of glory and conquest. With his silver tongue and knowledge of alchemy, he'd conquer this world with ease. All the stupid humans would kneel before him, and with their chins in the dirt, they'd look up and cheer, "Who in all the heavens is mightier than Emperor Envy!"
It never occurred to him that he was repeating history. After all, he could no longer remember his Father's face.