Title: I renew my soul with a sip from your moon cup…
Author: kira
Rating: OT
Words: 7240
Characters: Soma, Agni
Summary: A new beginning and a deep and lasting devotion…
Warnings: None
Author's notes: Title comes from the fact that the Hindu god, Agni, drinks copious amounts of soma. Soma, by the way, is not only a plant, but an intoxicant made from the soma plant as well as a god; he has many aspects and forms. He later on became the god of the moon, and as soma is drunk, he grows smaller and smaller until there's nothing left. He also makes more, so that he grows larger and larger; this is the phases of the moon where explained. Later on with the rise of the Brahmins, Soma's waxing and waning was due to a curse put on him by his father-in-law for neglecting his other wives. They were all sisters. Lord Yama is the god of death, Lady Manasa and her brother, Lord Vasuki, are snake gods. Manasa is worshipped in Bengali, Assam, Jharkand, and Orissa in June, July and August when snakes are most active. She is said to protect people from snake bites and infectious diseases.
Author's notes 2: I won at Kurohedonism with this fic.
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"Come, Agni," Soma said as he led him through the palace. "My room is this way. We'll get you all cleaned up and are you hungry? You're my servant and I probably shouldn't care… but your caste is higher than mine," he added uncertainly as he paused to look back to see if the man, once known as Chanda Das, was still following. "It wouldn't be right to make you stay in the servants' quarters," he mused, "Perhaps my grandfather will know what to do…" Soma smiled, before turning, and continuing on his way.
Agni nodded as he trailed along behind him. Darkness had fallen by the time they had reached the palace and he was grateful the hallways were relatively empty. At the moment, Agni was too exhausted, mentally and physically, to be bothered answering questions. This brief taste of freedom, after being locked up for so long, had him also dreading going back to prison where he would be executed after they felt he had suffered enough for his crimes again. While the few servants they did encounter barely paid any attention to them, the fear that his presence would get back to the rajah or one of his advisors had him on edge. Still, Agni was determined to enjoy this respite and see it as a gift from the gods he had forsaken.
They had been walking for several minutes, although it might as well have been an eternity to Agni, when they stopped in front of a large ornate doorway on the second floor. Soma pushed the doors open, and stepping inside, he said, "This is my room, Agni." He looked over his shoulder, expecting to see his new servant right behind him, but was surprised when he saw the man still standing in the hallway. "Come're, Agni!"
The sound of the prince's voice spurred him into action. Agni entered; his eyes wide as he took in the spacious expanse of gleaming white marble and luxurious furnishings and silks in the glittering glow of the lamplight. A faint smile tugged at his lips when he realized that this room alone made his former home look like a hovel despite his father's excesses and fondness of the finer things in life. Agni's smile broadened into a grin. There, in the middle of the biggest bed he had ever seen, sat the prince in a sea of pale blue silks.
"You like it?" Soma shyly asked.
Agni nodded.
The young prince smiled. "I don't know what to do with you…" he trailed off helplessly, heaving a soft sigh, when it suddenly hit him. "I know! You can stay here with me tonight and in the morning we'll find you rooms of your own. I don't know if it would be okay if you slept in the servants' quarters…"
"I would be honored to stay here tonight, my prince." Agni brought his hands together, giving the prince a slight bow.
"Good! Then it's settled! We'll ask my grandfather over breakfast what to do." Soma got up off his bed, and walking to a set of heavy wooden doors opposite the ones they had entered the room through, he pushed them open and stepped outside. "Come, Agni!"
Agni dutifully followed him again, even though he longed to get some sleep.
"The stars are really pretty tonight," Soma said as he looked up into the night sky. "And my namesake, the moon, is so full."
Agni, following his gaze, agreed.
"I like to look at the stars before I go to sleep," Soma said.
Agni sighed sadly. "I couldn't even see the sun from my cell, let alone the stars. Thank you, my prince…"
"You're welcome." Turning to him, Soma repeated what he had said when he had "rescued" him, "That you, Chanda Das, is dead… This you, Agni, are reborn with a new life." He smiled shyly and Agni returned it. "I think tomorrow when we wake up; you'll teach me how to fight, okay?"
"If that is what you desire, my prince," Agni replied, although he doubted he would be able to anything more than go back to jail in the morning. If that was the case, he prayed his execution would soon follow. Agni wondered if the gods had decided not to forsake him after all, despite his lack of respect for them. Then the thought that he may actually be dead hit him. If this is paradise, then I will gladly spend an eternity here with you…
"Soma Asman Kadar, are you mad?"
They turned at the sound of the voice.
"Grandfather!" Soma stepped forward to greet him. "I didn't know you were awake." He motioned for Agni to step forward. "This is my new servant, Agni. He's going to teach me how to fight."
Soma's grandfather, Prince Basant, stood there, shaking his head in disbelief. Heaving a heavy sigh, he said with a patience he did not feel, "Soma, that man is a known criminal."
"He is not! He is Agni and he is going to be my personal servant and teach me how to fight, Grandfather!" the sixteen year old prince said defiantly.
"Soma!"
"No!"
"Soma, listen to me. That man is Chanda Das, a known criminal," the old man repeated.
"Please," Agni quietly interrupted before Soma could reply, "I will go now." He placed his hands together and gave the sixteen year old a slight bow. "Thank you, Prince Soma, for this gift of freedom."
"Agni!" Soma whined.
"No, my prince, it is as your grandfather says. I cannot stay here; I must pay for my crimes."
"See? Even this man knows the depths of your foolishness, Soma."
"But, Grandfather!"
"But nothing! He must go!"
"No!" Soma looked away and back. "Please, Grandfather…" he pleaded.
"Prince Soma, listen to your grandfather, you know very well that I cannot stay here."
"Who's to know if you did? A few gossiping servants?" he replied. "My father could care less about what I bring home. A tiger cub, a new horse, a scorpion, a cobra, a pretty woman… it is all the same to him. All he has eyes for is my mother and she's not even the senior rani!" his voice broke on the last syllable, all the hurt he had been bottling up, threatening to break lose.
"He spends his time with her, Soma, because your mother makes him feel young again," Basant said softly. He felt bad for his grandson, the innocent victim in a power play between his daughter and the senior rani. In order to keep her own son, Debden, as the maharajah's heir, the senior rani had spread lies and rumors about Soma which resulted in his semi-ostracism from his family. Everyday the old man prayed his grandson would never learn the truth. Especially the fact that his mother did nothing to defend him, nor did she do anything to possibly put Soma in Debden's place as their father's heir.
"What about Sita? Or is she too young and that makes him feel too old?" Soma said tartly.
"She's only a concubine, Soma, and a low-caste one at that. So any sons she may give him are nothing."
"Well, I am the son of the junior rani and I am nothing!" Soma said bitterly as his eyes welled up with tears.
"Soma, you are much more than 'nothing,'" his grandfather soothed.
"You are my god…" Agni said softly. He had been pretending not to hear their exchange, but something in the prince's plaintive tones got to him. His own father had also been more concerned with luxuries and the pleasures of the flesh. He had neglected his family, as well as things of a spiritual nature, and that had shaped Agni into a self absorbed and self indulgent adult. It would be so easy for the young prince to end up as badly as he had if left unchecked. Since there was so much goodness he could see in Soma just from listening to him talk on their way here that Agni felt the gods were telling him to guide the young man away from that sort of lifestyle.
"What did you say, Das?"
"Nothing, Prince…?"
"Basant. You may address me as Prince Basant."
Agni nodded.
Basant regarded him appraisingly. "Are you sure you said nothing?"
Agni licked his lips, his mouth suddenly feeling dry as he feared he may have overstepped his bounds. He looked from one prince to the other as they both silently waited for his reply, when it him. He had absolutely nothing to lose. Taking a deep breath, and letting it out slowly, he said, "He is my god…"
"It has been said that you have turned away from the gods, Das," Basant pointed out.
"That is true, your highness, but your grandson has the light of Krishna in him."
"Flattery will get you nowhere, Das."
"I know. But I also know that I have nothing left to lose, except my life and that is already forfeit."
Basant laughed. "Well said, Das." He turned to his grandson. "Soma, he may stay as long he proves trustworthy or your father gets wind of him being here. He is also your responsibility. Since his caste is higher than ours, I'm not so sure about the wisdom of declaring him your servant, my boy."
Soma cast a quick glance at Agni, before nodding at his grandfather.
"That said, you are to see to it he is properly fed and clothed." Turning his attention to Agni, he added, "And, Das, I expect you to behave as the man you should have been and one worthy to serve the gods."
"Prince Basant, you have my word, not that it means much, that I shall be your grandson's most loyal and humble servant." Agni brought his hands together and gave him a slight bow.
Basant sighed. "You are Brahmin, you cannot be a servant."
"But I can do penance for my bad behavior."
"Indeed…" Basant looked over at his grandson. "Don't look so happy, Soma. This…" He waved his hand at Agni. "This man, Das, no Agni, is a bigger responsibility than Shu-shu will ever be. Treat him kindly and he may serve you well."
"Yes, Grandfather."
"Now go see to his needs. We shall talk while you are gone."
"Yes, Grandfather..." Casting an uncertain look at his grandfather and Agni, Soma left.
The two men regarded each other warily while they waited for the sixteen year old to get out of earshot.
"Das… no, Agni, do not think for a moment anyone here will forget who or what you are." I, for one, will be watching you carefully…
Agni nodded.
"It is only out of consideration for your caste that I am allowing this." Basant caught and held Agni's gaze. "For I am trusting you with a treasure more precious than gold."
"I understand that and I promise you, Prince Basant, that I will do everything in my power to guard that treasure for you. I am willing to give my life for him; that is how much I feel blessed in his presence. And, your highness…"
"Yes?"
"I will also do my best to steer him away from the excesses that plagued my former life and help shape him into the man I should have been."
Basant laughed. "Good luck with that! As you can see he can be quite willful."
Agni gave him a slight smile. "I can be as well, my prince."
Basant snorted in amusement, before turning suddenly serious. "If anything were to happen to him…" I will kill you…
"Understood."
They talked quietly amongst themselves for several minutes as Basant spelled out the conditions for Agni's stay. Soma returned a few minutes later, several servants in tow. They brought with them some food, clean clothes, and some water for Agni to wash up in. A drink of lassi and a bowl of rice later, Agni's exhaustion caught up to him and he longed for sleep as he changed into a clean kurta and salwar. Closing his eyes, he fell asleep on his feet.
"You look tired, Agni," Soma said, jolting him awake. "Why don't you go lie down in my bed and sleep?"
Agni blinked owlishly at him. "Your bed?"
"Yes. I'll go sleep with my grandfather if you want to be alone, or I can stay here if you like."
Fighting to stay awake, Agni simply nodded.
"Then I shall stay here, Grandfather, with Agni," the prince said as he gently guided him towards his bed. "Good night, Agni. I will see you in the morning for breakfast."
Agni fell into it, mumbling his thanks as he closed his eyes once more. He tried to remain awake; but now that Basant had left, Soma began to prattle on about his life in the palace. His voice proved to be soothing and it was not long before Agni drifted off to sleep. Feeling safe and comfortable, he slept well into the morning. He was sleeping so soundly that when Soma leaned over him and gently shook him, he never responded. So the prince shook him again.
This time, Agni felt it and he slowly surfaced from his dream. Eyes fluttering open, he took in the smiling countenance looming above him and he felt afraid. Without even being aware of what he was doing, Agni reached up and grabbed the prince by the throat. He put just enough pressure on it to leave no doubt as to what his intention was.
They stared at each other for several long, tense minutes, before Agni realized where he was and just who he had by the throat. He slowly released his grip. "I am so sorry, my prince, I forgot where I was…" His look of fear was mirrored by Soma's own.
The prince fingered his throat. "Agni…" he breathed. "Why…?"
"I am so sorry, my prince…" he repeated over and over again like a mantra.
Soma swallowed. "Did they hurt you…?"
Agni closed his eyes, the horrors of his prison stay coming back to him. He nodded.
"I am so sorry…" Soma echoed his sentiments. "No one will hurt you here," he said softly.
Agni nodded again.
"Come, let's forget this ever happened." Soma smiled.
Frowning, Agni said, "My prince…?"
"It would be better that way, Agni…" Smiling, Soma changed the subject, "Anyway, let's go have breakfast. Grandfather had them make you something special. I hope you don't mind more rice and mushy vegetables." Soma made a face. "He always makes me eat that nonsense whenever I've been sick."
"I don't mind at all. Anything would be good."
Soma grinned. "Then let's go!" He stepped back so Agni could get up out of bed. He waited patiently while Agni splashed some cool water on his face, before they headed towards the doors leading to the balcony. Once there, Agni followed Soma over to a table, set in the English manner, which sat beneath some colorful fabrics strung up as a makeshift canopy.
"Namaste, Prince Basant," Agni said as he gave him the traditional greeting.
"Namaste, Agni." Basant returned the greeting in kind.
They sat there, talking amongst themselves as servants poured their tea while they waited for their breakfast to arrive. Or rather Soma did all the talking. He chatted mostly about his life in the palace, as well as repeating various bits of gossip he had overheard. A few minutes later, several more servants arrived, bearing their breakfast on large trays. Agni noted with some interest that the last woman to arrive caused Soma's face to light up.
"Namaste, Meena," he said with a smile.
"Namaste, Prince Soma," she replied.
"Agni, that's Meena," Soma said as he briefly looked over in his direction.
"Namaste, Meena."
"Namaste, Agni," she said, before greeting Basant.
Agni found things got rather amusing from that point onwards. Meena had moved to stand at Basant's left. While she spent her time waiting on the elder Bengali prince, the younger did his best to vie for her attention. Plus Agni had the feeling she was not as happy to be in Soma's presence as he was in hers.
"Agni, did you sleep well last night?" Basant asked. He sipped his tea, savoring the rich, spicy taste of the chai.
"Very well, thank you, your highness. I feel as though I have died, and having repented my sins in hell, I am now in heaven… Or perhaps this is all a dream and when I wake up-"
"You are awake, Agni," Soma asserted as he reluctantly tore his attention away from Meena, his irritation at that bleeding through his tone, "And very much alive! Lord Yama decreed your soul was to be reborn and it was!"
Agni nodded.
Soma took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "Anyway, after breakfast, I want you to teach me how to fight, Agni."
"If that is what you desire, my prince, so shall it be." Agni said, although he did not really feel up to sparring with the prince.
"Good! Then after that we'll have lunch and then go riding or maybe we can go back into town or…I don't know. What should we do, Meena?"
"Whatever you feel like doing, Prince Soma."
Soma beamed at her. "Grandfather…?"
"Yes, my boy?"
"It's alright if Agni really teaches me how to fight, yes…?"
Basant nodded. "Yes, Soma. But if you get hurt, be a man about it." Basant reached for his tea and drank it as he looked pointedly over in Meena's direction, before returning his attention to his grandson.
"Yes, Grandfather…"
They lingered over breakfast, working out the details of their day. Soma decided that instead of sparring, they would roam the gardens so that Agni could get an idea of where he would now be living. Little by little Soma's attention was drawn to Meena again.
Agni watched as Soma half flirted, half chatted with her. The woman dutifully kept up her end of the conversation, although Agni got the distinct impression she was wishing she was elsewhere. Despite her coolness towards the prince and the smiles that never seemed to reach her eyes, she was a beautiful woman and he could understand why Soma was attracted to her. Then he realized this was the woman the prince had been going on about last nigh. Meena was the serving girl, who had looked after him all his life while she waited for him to grow up and be a man. Agni shifted his attention to Soma, mentally shaking his head, he could see the woman had no interest in him at all, yet the sixteen year old was oblivious to it.
"Agni?" Soma said, pulling him from his thoughts.
"Yes, my prince?"
"Have finished your breakfast? I want to go show you something."
"I believe so," Agni replied, although he had barely touched his food.
"Good! Then let's go!" Soma grabbed a few chapatti, wrapping them up in a napkin. Getting up to leave, he tucked the bundle in his sash.
After saying good bye to Soma's grandfather, the prince took Agni to see the peacock garden. The garden, a relic from a distant age, was slowly beginning to go back to the forest it probably once was. It was full of trees and overgrown flower beds; Soma's father having little interest in it. As they walked along, Soma chatted away, never noticing if Agni replied or not.
"Shu-shu!" Soma called out a few times before a small grey mongoose appeared. "This is my little Shu-shu, Agni. She doesn't like Meena very much… Do you, Shu-shu?' He picked her up. "This is Agni, Shu-shu. He's going to teach me how to fight one of these days. I think once he's settled in a bit more." He shyly looked Agni in the eye, looking for confirmation.
Agni nodded. "And I will also look after you, my prince, and attend to your needs, which I can do now."
"And…?" Soma looked at him, his expression hopeful.
"And I will be your friend too, if that is what you desire, my prince." Even though they barely knew each other, Agni had the feeling that in previous lifetime, they had been good friends, hence his offer.
"Really…?" The prince smiled shyly at him, afraid to believe Agni's offer was genuine. To cover up his discomfiture, Soma crouched so that he could put Shu-shu down on the ground. "Bye, Shu-shu…" he said softly as she scampered off. He stood up to watch her go, before turning back to Agni.
"Yes. Whatever you desire, so shall it be, my prince." Agni returned his smile, although it pained him to realize how lonely and afraid Soma was to accept his offer of friendship. He wondered if the prince had been hurt by those merely pretending to be friends for their own gain.
"Come!" Happy, Soma took his new friend by the hand and ran. "I want to show you something!"
"What?"
"My special place…" the prince said as they slowed to a walk. "I always come here when I want to be alone," he added, a hint of sadness tingeing his voice.
They walked towards an old stone pavilion. It was shrouded in jasmine and shaded by a stand of trees. It looked like the perfect hiding place and Agni could easily imagine the prince hiding there as small child. And yet, there was something about it that also suggested the perfect spot for a lover's tryst.
"It looks like the perfect place to be alone with one's thoughts," Agni said as they entered the pavilion.
Soma nodded as he sat down on a stone bench.
"Ever come here with a girl?" Agni sat on the open window sill.
Soma sheepishly laughed. "No… Meena is always too busy to come here with me."
Agni laughed.
"What's so funny about that?" the prince sullenly asked.
"Nothing… but think about it." Agni grinned.
Soma regarded him with a puzzled frown.
"You wanted to bring a girl here, no?"
"Yeah…?"
"Who did you bring here?"
"You…"
"And?" Agni chuckled at Soma's expression when he figured it out.
"You're not a girl," Soma said ruefully as he laughed.
"Exactly."
The prince sighed. "Maybe you'll help me…?"
"I suppose I could suck you off if you really want me too," Agni teased, his mock-serious expression softening into a grin. He hoped to steer the conversation away from Meena as he did not wish to disabuse the prince of his illusions of love concerning her.
Soma rolled his eyes. "That's not what I meant, Agni."
They laughed.
"I was hoping you'd help me find a way for me to be alone with Meena here…" the prince trailed off softly.
"I don't know, my prince. I don't think you can force someone to love you…"
"Meena loves me!" Soma asserted.
Agni nodded in reply. He looked around the pavilion as they lapsed into silence. Agni thought it appeared to have been built by the previous maharajah, if not the one before him, judging by its appearance. "It's a lovely place, my prince," Agni said, hoping things would not get awkward between them. "I wouldn't mind being alone with my thoughts here."
Soma nodded as he took the bundle of chapattis from his sash. Opening it he began to crumble them on the ground. Finished, he clapped his hands and out of nowhere a peacock appeared. He was followed by several peahens and their chicks, the peafowl calling mournfully at each other.
Trying to lighten the prince's melancholy mood, Agni asked about his family.
"Well, my brother Debden's wife is supposed to have her baby any time now from what I've heard… I wonder if she'll give him another son. He's got five now and three daughters, so another son would be welcome. My other brother, Krishna's wife had twin daughters last month. And Baladeva's wife is barren, but he loves her so much, that he's refused to get another wife or even take a concubine." Soma prattled on about his brothers.
"What about you? When's your wedding?"
"My parents never found the time to get me a wife, Agni," Soma said sadly. "And what about you? Is there a wife mourning your absence?"
"No… she died before I could marry and by then my father was on his way to 'enlightenment,'" Agni said sarcastically. "So he never found me someone else, despite my mother's pleas for him to do so. Then I just went down the wrong path and wound in jail, waiting for my execution."
"Oh…"
"Yeah…" Agni shrugged. "Besides, I had no use for a wife, since I could get whatever pleasure I needed from a brothel and thanks to my father I had plenty of money to buy it."
Soma nodded.
"Anyway that was my life such as it was. So what about yours? You never finished telling me about it."
"Well, there's nothing much to tell. I have a few sisters still here who haven't been married off yet because they're too young." He sighed and at Agni's questioning look he added, "I wonder if my sister Shanta is happy with her new husband. She promised to write to me, but I haven't heard anything and she's been gone a year now."
"She's probably too busy being a good wife and mother, my prince, to worry about writing and a life she's left behind."
"But I miss her…"
"I know." Agni tried to lighten the mood again. "Maybe she's living the life of a maharani with a fine son and another on the way."
Soma laughed. "Like Anjali! She's my brother, Debden's, senior wife. She likes to boss the others around and the only one who stands up to her, is his favorite concubine, Lalita!" Soma laughed again.
Agni was happy his sour mood had passed.
"Lalita was a former nautch girl, so of course all his wives hate her," the prince said, repeating family gossip. "Lalita's half-caste, so she has nothing to lose, and since the senior rani hates Anjali, she encourages her. I think it's because she was a maharani in a previous life and the senior rani can see it."
Agni laughed. "You're probably right, my prince."
Soma grinned.
They lapsed into silence again. It was a bit less awkward than the previous one and it was broken by the sounds of the peahens and their chicks. Soma felt compelled to break it and he began to tell Agni about Meena.
"She sounds like she took very good care of you when you were younger."
"That's because she loves me!"
Agni nodded. "But you know she's just a servant."
"She's more than just a servant! She loves me and took care of me and taught me things like an older sister and umm…"
"Perhaps your family will find you a wife soon. I think you are ready for the responsibilities of being a good husband. For all you know, they are searching far and wide to find the perfect wife for you," Agni added hopefully.
"Maybe…" Soma did not sound convinced.
"Well, there's always a pretty servant to warm your bed if you're lonely."
"I'm not lonely!"
"I never said you were, my prince."
Soma, somewhat mollified, nodded.
"One day you'll have someone and then I'll be lonely," Agni said, a tiny smile twitching his lips upward.
"I would feel bad if you were lonely, Agni," Soma said shyly.
"Yeah…?" Agni replied. He was deeply touched by the prince's statement.
Soma nodded. "It is not fun being lonely…"
"No, it is not."
"Yeah…"
"But as long as we're friends, we won't be lonely, my prince."
Soma smiled. "Nope…"
"You know, I never really had any friends. I was too busy being an idiot and throwing my life away to have any…"
"You're not an idiot, Agni!"
"Thank you, but I was… What about you? I bet you have lots of friends."
"No…" Soma said sadly. "I have none… except for Meena."
"She's very special to you," Agni said. He was amazed at how deftly Soma returned the conversation back to Meena.
"Yeah… I love her, Agni…" Soma said shyly.
"I know… But isn't she too old for you?"
"No… She's been waiting for me to grow up."
"I see…"
"Yeah?" Soma's expression turned hopeful.
Agni nodded. "My prince, even if she was waiting for you, her caste is lower than ours, which would make her nothing more than a favorite concubine."
"I know…" Soma said sadly.
"So keep your heart open for a wife as well. My mother once told me, 'a happy wife is a happy household…'" Must be why she took a young lover after my father abandoned us… And Kama always did make her very happy…
"I know… my mother is very happy with my father even if he's very old…" Soma sighed. "I just wish they'd pay more attention to me."
"As your friend, I will pay attention to you, my prince, if that is what you desire."
"I do…" the prince said softly.
"Then so shall it be."
They smiled as a companionable silence settled between them again.
"What was that?" Agni asked when a faint rustling caught his attention. He looked out the pavilion's open widow, but saw nothing. He stood and looked again, but still saw nothing, except the overgrown vegetation that surrounded the place.
Soma got up and stood next to him, staring out the window as well. "That's my grandfather's personal servant, Biju. He's always watching over me, but he thinks I don't know that he does." Soma frowned. "I'm sorry; I guess my grandfather doesn't trust you…" He looked at Agni.
"He has every right not to trust me. I could physically harm you like I did this morning," Agni said as Soma fingered his throat. "But I won't, I swear it, my prince!" I cannot believe how easily you forgave that offence…
"Okay…" Soma lowered his hand.
"Or I could abuse you like I did the boys in the brothels…" Agni gently cupped Soma's cheek.
The prince's eyes went wide.
"But that would only hasten my death, and if I was lucky it would be a quick and painless one," Agni said sadly as he let his hand fall to his side. "Maybe I'm really dead… And this is hell; stuck in a secluded garden with a beautiful boy I cannot touch and should not touch, without any way to leave…" He became lost in his thoughts.
"You wouldn't simply leave… me…?" Why does everyone want to leave me? Am I that horrible a person they cannot remain by my side for long…?
"Hunh?" Agni frowned at the prince.
"Leave me…" Soma said, trying to keep the panic out of his voice. As much as his grandfather had tried to shelter him from the realities of the palace politics, Soma knew that his family did not care much for him, but had no idea as to why. He was every inch the dutiful son and loving brother, and yet, no one beyond his grandfather ever expressed any genuine affection for him. So he saw Agni as not only a sparring partner, but a way to have a friend and someone who might possibly care about him. Please don't leave me… I hate having no friends or anyone I can count on to be there for me, except Meena and my grandfather… Please, even if all you do is lie to me about being my friend, stay…
"I cannot leave here… I'm dead and in hell."
"But…?"
"I'm dead, my prince. I would have to die in order to be reborn, no? But before my soul can move on, I need to spend time in hell to pay for my sins."
Soma nodded; his expression sad. "But you're not dead," he insisted.
"How can I not be?" Agni cried, his eyes welling up with tears.
"Because if you're dead, then so am I…" Soma said plaintively. "And I don't want to be dead…" No one, except Grandfather and Meena, would mourn my death…
Taking a deep breath, and letting it out slowly, Agni said softly as he gripped Soma by the shoulders, "I'm sorry…" He let go of the prince.
Soma wiped away his tears. "It would be so easy to die…" Especially when it hurts so much to live…
"But so much harder to live."
"Yeah…" Soma set his hand down on the window still. He was about to hop up onto it when something tickled the back of his hand. He nearly moved it, thinking it was an insect, when they heard a soft hiss. "Agni…" he whispered, his whole body paralyzed with fear.
"Don't move."
"Please, Agni… Please don't leave me," he whispered.
"I won't." Agni sent up a little prayer to the Lady Manasa asking her to watch over the prince and keep him safe from a bite as the cobra slithered up his arm in a most uncobra-like fashion.
"Agni…"
"Sssh…"
"I don't want to die…"
"You won't if you remain still. Let the cobra think you are a tree."
"I'm afraid…" It took everything Soma had to remain still. His heart was beating so fast he could feel it. He gripped the window still tightly to keep his arm from trembling. Closing his eyes, he did his best to slow his breathing, before panic set in which he knew would get him bitten. "Agni…"
"Don't be. The snake charmers in the market place handle them all the time and they don't die. I also remember seeing one kiss the head of a cobra."
"Yeah…?" Soma swallowed nervously. He was afraid to look at his arm and afraid not to.
Agni kept his attention divided between the snake and Soma. If the boy passed out from fright, there was a very real danger he would get bitten, before he hit the floor. "You'll be fine, just keep still…" Agni said, slowly bringing his right hand up, when all of a sudden it moved as if possessed. Stunned, he could not believe he was plucking the snake from the prince's arm, and flinging it out of the window like it was nothing. It was as if the goddess, Lady Manasa, was assisting him in the matter of one of her wayward children.
They stared at each other uncomprendingly, before Soma burst into tears and threw himself at Agni. He whispered, "You saved me, Agni!" as he clung tightly to him as he trembled. "Your hand is blessed by the gods…" Soma said as he pulled away from him, awed. He took Agni's hand, kissing its palm. "Thank you…" he said, choking back a sob as leaned into him.
The elder Bengali tentatively put his arms around the prince. "It's alright… you're safe and that's what's important."
Biju entered the pavilion. "Prince Soma!"
"Yes?" Soma pulled away from Agni.
"Are you alright?"
"Yes… Biju… He saved me from a cobra…" Soma, feeling a bit lightheaded, swayed slightly. He felt his strength returning when Agni reached out to steady him
"I saw that… and I was afraid… Forgive me, Prince Soma…"
"It's alright…" Soma said. "I was afraid too…"
Biju nodded. "Come; let's leave here, before the Lady sends more of her children here to harm you."
"Yes…" Soma allowed himself to be led away by his grandfather's servant. "Come, Agni…"
Agni nodded and followed after them. He still could not understand how or why he was able to do what he did, but accepted it as a blessing from the gods. "Prince Soma, I think we should light some incense and leave a small offering to the goddess so that she will watch over you and keep her children away from you."
"Yes… You will help me, Agni." Soma reached for his hand. Stroking the palm, he added, "Biju, this hand…"
"It's a gift from the gods!" Biju asserted.
"Yes…"
"Come, my prince, let's go…" Agni started to walk away. Since Soma never let go of his hand, he walked along beside him, while Biju trailed along behind them. He wished the prince would let go of him as it was starting to make him feel uncomfortable. The temptation to take advantage of the situation was strong; a beautiful boy that hero-worshipped him, a place where he knew they could be alone, sharing the prince's bed even if it had only been for one night, and with the way Soma was looking at him and the fears he was expressing, Agni had the feeling that was about to become a permanent sleeping arrangement. Looking over at Soma, Agni was not sure if he really wanted that. Perhaps this too is a test from the gods… But how to resist his charms without hurting him…? Or causing problems for him should I show weakness and give into my desire for a beautiful boy…? Agni mentally sighed and wondered not for the first time if he was truly dead and in a hell of his own making as he listened silently to the conversation the prince was having with his grandfather's servant.
By the time they reached the palace, Soma had worked himself up into a state of hysteria. The flurry of activity surrounding them left Agni feeling uneasy. Soma refused to leave his side, drawing unwanted attention to the former criminal. He was afraid of what would happen if it was discovered who he was, especially since the story the prince was telling was so outlandish as to be unbelievable and Agni was there to witness it firsthand.
Just when things were becoming so unbearable Agni wanted to flee the palace, Basant arrived. He calmly took over, directing the servants so that peace suddenly reigned and they were able to go upstairs to Soma's room. Basant summoned his personal physician, who prescribed a sleeping draught to calm his grandson's nerves. Once things had settled down and Agni was finally able to leave Soma's side, he walked out onto the balcony to speak with Basant.
"Your highness?"
Basant turned to face him. "Tell me again what happened."
"We went to some pavilion in the place Prince Soma called 'the peacock garden.' I guess it was because of flock of peafowl there… Anyway, we just talked and somehow the conversation led to me wondering out loud if I were dead or not. And we talked of other things, but the Lady Manasa decided to test us…" Agni paused to collect his thoughts. "She sent one of her children to us. I swear that cobra appeared out of nowhere…"
"Perhaps it was her brother, Lord Vasuki, who sent the snake instead."
"It's possible, your highness. Whichever god sent the snake sent it there for a reason. And what is even stranger is how the snake came to be there. He would have had to climb up the stone wall of the pavilion. It would have been much easier for the snake to have climbed in through the same lattice work that the peachicks did. And who ever heard of a cobra climbing things?" Agni looked away and back. "Honestly, if I hadn't been there, I would think the prince was making up the story…." he trailed off, frowning. "Your highness, how was I able to grasp that snake as firmly as I did without it biting your grandson…?"
"I do not know, perhaps it was just a vision that shared by the two of you?"
Agni shook his head. "Your servant, Biju, also saw it."
Basant looked surprised. "Biju saw it?"
"Yes… He was just as afraid as we all were." I think I was the most afraid of all…
"Indeed. You held a great treasure in your hands."
"I know…"
"Perhaps, Lord Vasuki and his sister sent the snake as a test, not only for you, but for me as well. I'm not sure if I believe this fantastic tale of yours and yet…"
"Your highness, if I were going to harm him, I would have simply let the snake bite Prince Soma."
Basant took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "True enough."
"And my hand…" Agni stared at his right hand. "It moved as if it had a life of its own. When I made the decision to save him, it all happened so fast. I still can't believe I was able grasp it and throw it as far as I could out the window…" He shook his head at the memory.
"But?"
"But when I looked out, there was no snake slithering away in the grass. Before you ask, where it landed, or should have landed, the grass was tampered down, no doubt by the prince as he told me it was a favorite haunt of his, so I should have seen it. Biju was easily seen."
Basant nodded. "I will make an offering thanking Lady Manasa for keeping you both safe."
"Thank you, your highness." Agni held up his hand. "If this is truly a gift from the gods, then I will dedicate it solely to your grandson's service as a gesture of thanks to the gods for sending him to me."
"No, thank you, Agni…" Basant turned at the sound of a faint cough. "What is it, Biju?"
"The prince wants Agni…"
"Very well… Come."
Agni followed Basant back inside. The room had been darkened, but it was full of servants anxiously wondering if the young prince was truly alright and if not, what would happen to them if he were to die. None wanted to face Basant's wrath should the worst happen. They walked over to his grandson's bed.
Meena leaned over and said, "Prince Soma, Agni is here now." She stood up, and stepped back to give them room to approach.
Soma lay in his bed, one arm draped across his eyes. He desperately wanted to go to sleep, but fear of another snake appearing out of nowhere kept him awake. "Agni…" he said softly.
"Yes, my prince?"
"Stay…"
"If that is what you desire, my prince, so shall it be…" Agni looked over at Basant, who nodded. He stood there, waiting patiently to see if Soma had anything else to say.
"Soma, you rest now, I'll be back to check on you later," his grandfather said, ushering everyone out except Agni.
Soma made a soft noncommittal noise in reply to his grandfather as he left.
"I'm still here, my prince."
"Sleepwithme…" the prince said, slurring his words together.
"If that is what you desire."
"Yes…" Soma rolled onto his side, facing Agni, and looking up at him bleary-eyed.
Agni briefly hesitated, before crawling into bed. He lay on his side, facing Soma. He could see in the dim light of the room that the prince had relaxed a bit.
"Agni…?"
"I'm here, my prince."
"'fraid…"
"There is nothing to fear, my prince, I shall watch over you," Agni said softly.
Soma slowly moved over to him as the sleeping draught finally started working. He reached out and gently grasped Agni's right hand. "Thankyou…" he murmured.
Agni sighed softly. He lay there, listening to Soma's breathing even out as sleep finally claimed him. Thanking the gods for this opportunity to turn his life around, Agni felt a deep sense of humility at this most precious gift. He looked over at the young prince, pleased he was no longer looking so drawn. Sleep well, my prince…