Title: Gift Wrappers
Genre: Humor
Characters: Kakashi/Iruka
Rating: PG
Summary: Unwrapping gifts can be quite troublesome when Iruka's around...or not.:)
Comments: Kishimoto's, not mine.

rrrrriiiiipppp...

"What the...Kakashi! What in kami-sama's name are you doing!" cried a distraught looking Iruka as he tried grabbing the gift from Kakashi's hands.

"Er, unwrapping my gift?" replied the bemused jounin, all the while keeping a strong hold over the gift as the chuunin kept attempting to snatch it away from him.

"Ehem..Iruka, it's a gift for me you know...from Kurenai and Asuma...and, er, I would appreciate it if you...aaagghh! The fuck is wrong with you Iruka!" snarled Kakashi when Iruka managed to "liberate" the gift from his iron-grasp.

Said chuunin was now hugging the gift to his chest, pouting heavily and glaring daggers at the supposedly genius ninja. "Why did you have to tear up the gift wrapper! How can you mangle something that looks so nice! We might have been able to use it again for our own gifts, then we wouldn't have to buy all those expensive stuff at the stationery shop..." rambled Iruka as he tried piecing together the shredded gift wrapper covering Kakashi's gift.

Kakashi, needless to say, was utterly floored by Iruka's logic. Please, please not this again...Counting slowly to ten and taking a deep breath, he decided to risk using one of his dreaded ninja techniques, one which was (in)famous even beyond the borders of Konoha --- lying.

He could only hope that he wouldn't run into any problems in the near future. Lying per se was easy. Lying to Iruka, however, was another story. The man had a built-in bullshit detector that always went ping within 10 yards of spouted-nonsense. Sometimes, having a shinobi teacher as a lover can be quite a handful.

"Ruka, they say that you need to tear the gift wrapper when you open your gifts, otherwise you won't be getting any more gifts for that year," Kakashi stated calmly, all the while crossing his fingers and praying to the names of all the gods ever invoked by mankind for Iruka to believe his little li...ehem, spurt of creativity just this once.

"I've never heard anybody say that. Are you trying to bullshit me again?"

"No, it's true", answered the jounin placatingly, and trying to think of a hundred moves ahead of the chuunin. Kakashi was nothing but a genius in strategy after all. "They say that tearing the wrapper apart merely shows your happiness for having received the gift, and your enthusiasm is measured by the energy you put into tearing the wrapping." Trying to look all honest and serious while looking straight into the chuunin's semi-disbelieving eyes was beginning to strain the resources of the Sharingan user. Time to change tactics...

"And don't you think it's unfair if we use other people's wrappers to cover our gifts? They'll probably notice, and then they'll think badly of us, recycling used gift wrappers when we can more than afford to buy new ones..." Lying itself won't probably work on the chuunin. But lying with a dash of guilt-tripping might prove otherwise.

Though looking a little mollified, Iruka was still adamant. "But we're not going to use them for the same people, Kashi."

Aha! A softer tone this time. Just a little more push...

"Look, it's your choice whether you want to believe it or not, but this gift is mine, and I do want to receive more gifts this Christmas." Shifting his stare from Iruka's eyes to the wall behind the chuunin, Kakashi tried to look both exasperated and tired at the same time. "If you wanted the gift wrapper so badly, you could have told me before I started unwrapping my gift." Kakashi stared forlornly at his gift, looking like a puppy that had been kicked by a loving master.

"Ahh..I'm sorry Kashi," said Iruka as he started to feel a little guilty for his behavior, and covering the distance between the two of them with a few steps, he shyly handed over the now-abused gift (and gift wrapper) to the jounin.

"Here's your gift back," murmured Iruka, whose signature blush was threatening to spread over his face as he recognized the absurdity of his actions. He was, truth to be told, somewhat ashamed of himself, acting like one of his students and taking the stuff of other people. He wondered if his students were beginning to rub off him...

"It's ok, Ruru," replied the Jounin, whose strategic genius and talent in perverting any situation involving Iruka was beginning to form very naughty plans involving the hapless chuunin and unwrapping certain, er, gifts.

"After all, I have yet to unwrap the best gift I've received this year," growled Kakashi as he proceeded to hastily "unwrap" Iruka from his clothing.

"What th..Kakashi!"

owari

A/N: Somebody did mention to me that I have to tear the gift wrappers if I want to receive more gifts. Dunno if it's true though. But I do have a friend who recycles gift wrappers...hehe.