Christmas Crisis
Disclaimer: I don't own pokemon or anything related to it, the song "Blue Danube", or practically anything else but this story itself.
May and Max walked up to their father gleefully. He had a surprise for them; after all, it was Christmas in only two days.
"Hey dad!" She said smiling, but her father's expression caused her to frown.
"May, Max, I need to tell you something," His gaze shifted toward their mother who ran from the scene, crying. Max and May's eyes widened. Something big was up, and they knew it. Before he could begin, they started with a turbulent wave of questions.
"I'M NOT YOUR REAL SON!"
"THERE AREN'T GOING TO BE ANY PRESENTS!"
"YOU AND MOM ARE GETTING DIVORCED!"
"NO PRESENTS?"
"MOM HAS AN ILLNESS!"
"PRESENTS!"
"GRANDMA'S DEAD?" All went silent after that. Norman coughed but continued.
"Erm… no. This doesn't have to do anything about death. Or grandmas, or illnesses," He chuckled. "This has to do about Christmas."
"Wahhhh!" May cried, "No presents!" Norman coughed again. They didn't know of the horrible truth that was to come, and frankly, to them, it was BAD news.
"…Dad?" Max peeped.
"Kids… Santa's not real." The kids laughed it off, thinking it was a joke.
"Yeah sure, just like the tooth fairy," Max joked.
"Yeah, or the boogey-man!" May added, laughing.
"Um, May? The boogey-man is fake…" Max said, sweatdropping.
"WHAT? NO WAY!" May screamed. Norman sighed.
"Kids… I am Santa."
"NNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"
---
"May, where are we going?" Max asked as she forcefully tied combusken's harness.
"Some place called the "North Pole". Or as mom likes to call it, "Santa's house!" She said gleefully.
"Where… is that?" Max questioned once more.
"Well, if we keep going north, we'll find Candy Land. It's this place with a bunch of candy canes."
"I thought that meant we were in the North Pole," Max argued, his glasses shimmering.
"Max, think about it! Candy canes, Candy Land, CANDY?" He stared at her as she positioned herself in the sleigh.
"May, this isn't going to work… Why'd you bring me anyway?" He demanded. She turned to him while holding the reins.
"Don't you want to see if you're on the good list?"
"Well, yes but—That doesn't have to do—"
"Hold this." She tossed him a rein, as she made sure her stuff was packed.
"Combusken…" Combusken said, uncertain.
"Of course it's safe!" May retorted. "Now then," She said, grabbing the straps. "What are we supposed to say? Oh yeah! Go!" She commanded, but combusken stared at her in confusion. "Take off!" She tried. "Yip-yip?" Max shook his head in hopelessness. "Mush?" She squeaked. Combusken shrugged but heaved the sled Northward. "I did it!" May announced in triumph.
"May! We're not getting anywhere!" Max squabbled. Combusken's feet slipped under the snow, occasionally melting the ice. Before Max and May knew it, Combusken was standing in a puddle of warm water, exhausted.
"Who knew?" She asked, getting out of the sled. She walked over to the mortified pokemon and praised it for its efforts.
"This is just great!" Max said, throwing his arms in defeat. May shot up.
"I have an idea!"
"What? You're gonna pull the sled?" He smirked.
"Of course not! Wait here with combusken," She ordered, trotting away. Max sighed and snuggled in his jacket.
"Will May hurry up?" He asked impatiently. He looked around in boredom, spotting May's supplies. "Wonder what's in here…" Dipping his hand into the bag, he fished for something useful. "A book!" Flipping through the pages, he found that it was a Christmas book, including pictures and all.
"May won't know," He murmured to himself, turning a page and reading aloud. "Santa Claus lives in New York, as the richest man in the world." Max reread that page. "New York! I thought it was the North Pole! Maybe the North Pole is a city in New York? I understand now. Wait a minute—Richest man in the world? He's 1600 years old and has elves working for him! How does he make money? And I thought Willy Wonka was the richest, he has oompa-loompas…" Max said in disappointment. "The North Pole is at the top of the world, also known as the Arctic. Well that seems logical. Arcticuno, Arctic," He said in realization.
"Max!" May shouted while holding her pokeballs. "What are you doing with my Christmas book? Put it down!" She shouted, humiliated her brother found out how she knew these things.
"Hey May, Santa must be real! It says so! But what about dad…?" He asked in astonishment. His dad was his role model AND a liar?
"Well duh." May remarked. "Anyone with a brain knows that. Who else brings us Christmas presents at 12am?" Max pondered over it.
"Yeah. But what about his enslavement of the elves? That mustn't be good…" Max thought, continually reading.
"Max, Max, Max…" May responded hopelessly. "The elves aren't enslaved, they just make toys for a living. I mean, they like making toys, and where else would they live? Munchkins these days are outcasts," Max stared at her.
"And oompa-loompas?"
"Enslaved."
"So what's the plan?" Max asked.
"Come on out, everyone!" May shouted, tossing her pokeballs into the air. Squirtle, combusken, bulbasaur, skitty, beautifly, and munchlax stood, occasionally throwing a snowball at combusken. "I need you guys to help us get to the North Pole to see Santa," She replied after seeing their confused faces. After the onslaught of voices ceased, she tied their harnesses and bridles in order. Clasping the ropes, she sat down in the sleigh and handed Max a few reins.
"Mush!" They said together, and the pokemon were able to forcibly run a good amount of distance.
"May?" Max asked.
"Yeah?" She looked at him.
"I thought Santa's stantler and rapidash fly over Hoenn."
"Actually, it's all magic," She answered.
"That's not the point. How are we supposed to go oversea if our pokemon don't know how to fly?" He asked, narrowing his eyes suspiciously.
"We'll walk the rest of the way!" He exhaled in despair, all the while staring at the view.
---
"What are those screaming sounds?" May asked, hearing voices appear and disappear all of a sudden.
"You think it's the Doppler effect?" Max asked, looking behind. May shifted her gaze to him in confusion. "You know… redshift and blueshift?" She continued staring. "Astronomy…?" He tried again. She shook her head. "Forget it," He sighed, looking under the sleigh. His eyes widened after hearing another scream dissipate. May looked over, concerned.
"What's the matter?"
"You don't want to know," He said, shuddering. May peered over the sled and grew blue as she slowly made her way back. "Um, guys?" She asked to her pokemon while tilting over the sled. "You mind not… crashing into people?" She asked. They grunted in consent. The screams died away eventually, and they came to an abrupt stop, causing May to almost fly forward.
"Good thing I was wearing my seatbelt. Hey, what was that?" She asked, sitting up. It was none other than Drew standing before them, holding his hand up. He turned to face May.
"May? What the Hell are you doing?" He asked, glancing at the pokemon in front of him, cautiously.
"Don't swear!" She warned, watchful of Max.
"Okay… why are you forcing your pokemon to drag you around?" He asked in exasperation.
"For your information," She started, "We're going to the North Pole." Drew would've burst out laughing if he was that type of guy. Fortunately he wasn't.
"The North Pole? You're kidding."
"We're not!" Max retorted. "We're gonna find Santa Claus and prove to Dad that he's real!"
"So you're forcing your pokemon take you to the North Pole against their wills?" He asked again.
"Of course not! Am I?" Her pokemon replied by groaning. "See?" She yelled.
"Just what I'd expect from an amateur coordinator," He mumbled. "Oh, and kid? Santa's not real," He said in response to Max. Max looked up at him fearfully and May blocked her brother's view.
"Of course he is! You wanna come with us and see?" She asked.
"Not on your life. I'll be training, instead of wasting my time," He answered, sauntering away.
"That's right, keep walkin'!" May shouted after him. "We'll show him! Mush!" She ordered. Her pokemon grumbled but reluctantly agreed and they were off.
---
"Hey May, how much farther?" Max asked.
"Uh…" They passed a sign reading 'Hoenn - 10 Miles', and she answered. "We're almost there. Remember, watch out for candy canes!" A burst of snow stopped her pokemon and she looked about in fear. "What's happening?" She demanded.
"I think we're in a blizzard!" Max said, his voice growing faint.
"Just great!" May mumbled as the wind tore at her voice. Combusken and munchlax fainted, causing them to go at a much slower pace. "We could've used Drew's pokemon if he came!" The wind slapped them this way and that, and they could only hope they were going the right way.
"May!" Max called, hoarsely.
"What?" She asked, unfazed.
"What about Mom and Dad?" He replied, shivering as the snow made its way to his bare body.
"What about them?" She responded.
"Won't they be worried?" Max inquired as the harsh winds had them going in another direction.
"Of course not! We'd be lucky if they even thought about us. I mean, Santa gives us presents, but what do they do?" She asked. Max understood that she was still holding a grudge.
"Shouldn't we stop?" He shrieked after the snow had worsened. May's response wasn't even heard. Max sat back, waiting for the storm to end, hoping his sister had at least enough sense of direction and intellect.
---
The driving snow subsided, and the area before May and Max was visible.
"May?" Max asked, concerned.
"What…?" She asked, picking herself up from her snooze. After finding that she lost her voice, she resorted to sleeping.
"You were sleeping?" He shouted in irritation.
"No, napping," She corrected.
"It's the same thing!"
"Nu-uh."
"Ya-huh."
"Nu-uh!"
"Ya-huh!"
"Guys!" A voice called. They stopped and looked for the owner. A white haired, heavy, short man came bounding their way.
"Santa Claus! We must be in the North Pole!" May said gleefully. Max stared in awe as the figure started huffing.
"Santa…? Is that you…?" Max asked. The figure chuckled and pulled off his scarf.
"Nu-uh."
"ASH!" They shouted in puzzlement.
"Hey guys," he responded.
"Aren't you supposed to be in Pallet with your Mom?" Max asked.
"Yeah but I got this job offer. I'm supposed to be Hoenn's Santa Claus," He replied, shaking the white snow from his head. He glimpsed at May's tired pokemon. "Uhh… what are you doing?"
"We're going to the North Pole," May answered.
"To find Santa!" Max added.
"Really? Why?" Ash asked.
"Dad said he's not real…" Max rejoined in sadness. "And he said it like he meant it." Ash ogled in awe.
"C'mon guys, you know Santa's real. Cheer up; be happy, it's almost Christmas Eve! If you don't buy at The Christmas Shop, you can shut up and leave!" He sang.
"…What?" His friends asked in unison.
"I have to sing it to customers, it's our Christmas motto."
"Hahahahaha! On the contrary, twerp!" A voice laughed. "Prepare for trouble, we're gonna get pikachu," Jessie started.
"Make it double, it's a Christmas come true!" James popped in.
"To protect the world from devastation," Jessie continued.
"To spread Christmas cheer to every nation!" James added.
"To denounce the evils of truth and love!"
"To extend our reach to the stars above!"
"Jessie."
"Jaaames," James emphasized.
"Team Rocket blasts off at the speed of light!"
"Please don't use pikachu, we're afraid of heights!" James shouted. Jessie whacked him in the head with a paper fan for butchering the motto.
"Meeeeooowthhh, that's right!" Meowth flipped on stage.
"You guys again?" May sighed.
"Dat's wite, twoip. And we're here to swipe pikachu!"
"That's new," Ash muttered sarcastically.
"Merry Christmas!" James said gleefully, handing Ash a present while looking for pikachu. He spotted him handing out fliers to baby pokemon.
"A ha!" Jessie said in triumph, following James as Ash opened his present.
"It's… a heavy ball?" He asked, holding the large ball up. Its tip had a small flame that was traveling steadily down the wick.
"Ash! That's a BOMB!" Max shouted, running into Ash.
"Oof!" Ash grunted, as the bomb flew out of his hands and towards Team Rocket.
"Wah!" James shouted as he caught the bomb, though only inches away from grasping pikachu. He tossed it to Jessie.
"Ahh!" She shouted, tossing it back. Blue Danube started to play. James caught it and threw it at a different angle, while Jessie leaped to grab it. She landed gracefully, while tossing it again. Meowth caught it just as elegantly, throwing it downward as Jessie caught it and was headed James's way. She was about to throw it, smiling, but fortunately for Ash, pikachu, May, and Max, it blew up, along with the song coming to an abrupt finish.
"AAHHHH!" The trio shouted. "We're blasting off again!" They disappeared over the horizon and Ash gazed in a trance.
"I'll never forget you, guys. Merry Christmas."
"Ughh…" Max groaned, picking himself up.
"So…" May started. "Pikachu's safe."
"Yep. He's supposed to be an elf," Ash answered, turning from his previous position. "Now then, you guys going to the North Pole or what?"
"Of course!" May said.
"Well, I can tell you it isn't far from here. Just keep going north," He pointed northward. "Uhh… or maybe it's this way," He pointed in the opposite direction. "Or…"
"We got it, Ash!" Max said, annoyed.
"Oh good. So it's right?"
"No!" Max shouted, finding the sun. He spotted it sinking over the horizon. "If the sun sets in the west, North must be that way," He pointed to the left.
"Do you want to come?" May asked, as the scene dramatically darkened.
"I can't…" Ash answered in a courageous voice. "Me and pikachu must protect the shop from strangers. We wish you luck on your journey though."
"Pi…" Pikachu answered, walking up to May. He handed her free samples of pokemon food, which she reluctantly didn't eat.
"Thank you, Ash." She said, her eyes sparkling. He smiled and shook her hand as she walked back, her outline disappearing from sight. She sat up in the sleigh, and with a faint grin, mushed away, Max alongside her.
---
"What was that all about?" He demanded.
"I dunno, dramatic moments call for dramatic endings," She answered.
"Hardly dramatic," Max argued. "Well, Ash said we're almost there… but who can trust Ash? He has no sense of direction whatsoever."
"Maybe so, but I have this feeling…"
"Oh really?" Max asked.
"Yeah, this emptiness in my gut…" Her stomach bellowed and she turned red. "Guess I don't! I'm starving!" She informed, looking for her bag. She had fed the pokemon their scraps and was out of food. "Crap." Looking at the small can of pokefood, she shrugged and popped the lid.
"May… you're seriously not going to—never mind…" He mumbled as she started gobbling up the food.
"This tastes worse than what Ash cooks!" She shouted, scraping the insides of the can for remains.
"And you're still eating it because…?"
"I'm hungry!"
---
Max, leaning on an elbow, stared in boredom. His head shot up when they flew by a red and white blur. Max glimpsed at the object, but before he knew it, it blended with the winter scene. Turning back, he gasped.
"May!" Max shouted, looking for his sister who had all of a sudden disappeared.
"…What now?" She asked, rising from her laying position. Max's glasses glimmered.
"Let me guess. You were sleeping this whole time and you let the pokemon keep going without any direction?" May yawned.
"Not exactly… I was napping." Max sighed. His sister could be so dense sometimes… what was he thinking? She was dense all the time!
"Anyway, look ahead!" A hook similar to the curved object he had seen before glistened in the sunlight. May gasped.
"A giant candy cane! We must be in Candy Land!" The two watched as the large hooked sweets blurred by, occasionally flashing when the sunlight made contact. As the sleigh continued its directionless way, they felt a skid, and a swerve.
"Whoa!" Max shouted, thrusting the reins back. He looked at the pokemon, clattered atop each other in a large mess.
"What happened?" May asked, shifting her eyes to the pokemon. "Ahh!" Max looked below at the trembling sled.
"May, I-I think we're on ice…" He informed, eyes widening.
"Well, that's good to hear. Must mean we're near the North Pole." A crackle was heard, and a shiver raced down May's spine.
"And it's cracking," Max finished.
"WHAT?" May shrieked in fear, looking over the sleigh once more. Indeed, the ice below them was separating. "Crap." She looked toward Max and he stared back.
"What?" He demanded.
"You're the genius! How're we supposed to get out of this?"
"I'm only eight, how would I know?" May glared and he sighed.
"Okay… call back the pokemon." Without hesitation, May retrieved her pokemon.
"Now… Run!" Max shouted, tumbling over the sled. May sat in shock, but quickly leapt over the rim, following suit. The ice was starting to break, and the sled was starting to slip through.
"My Christmas Book!" May called, stupidly grabbing the large book from her nearby bag.
"May!" Max shouted in alarm. He never knew his sister could be that stupid. Looking around, he spotted a pokeball and hoped it was bulbasaur. "Go!" He ordered, a little excited. Unfortunately, it was beautifly, and he groaned. Instead of searching for bulbasaur's pokeball, an idea came to him and he skidded to the bank.
"Wahh!" May shouted as she tripped. The ice cracked beneath her and broke through.
"String shot on May, NOW!" Before she fell into the icy water, a sticky string engulfed her entire body and stiffly, pulled her ashore. May blinked in confusion, while looking down at her now white plastered body.
"Good thinking beautifly!" She complemented. Max huffed in annoyance. "Max, do something to help get this stuff off of me!" He glared, but had another idea.
"Try a silverwind," He suggested carelessly, forgetting about May's safety. The bug complied and flapped its wings harshly. May shut her eyes tightly as the wind tore at her exterior, cutting through the glue-like substance. Before she knew it, she fell to the ground, free and unharmed.
"Good job, beautifly!" She cooed, caressing the butterfly's head.
"Beautifluuuoy!" It replied, thankful.
"Your welcome," Max muttered.
"At least I still have my Christmas Book. This book cost me my entire allowance!"
"May, you don't get an allowance!" Max argued. "And that was a Christmas present!"
"Yeah but that's opinion-based, now isn't it?" She disagreed.
"NO!"
"Let's see…" May scanned the area; oblivious that practically everything looked the same. "I think we're near Santa's house. Take out the pokenav," She advised.
"We didn't bring the pokenav…" Max grumbled.
"That's right!" She slapped a hand to her forehead. "I brought it with me!" Fishing her pockets, she found the small portable device.
"You took my pokenav?" He asked, concerned for its safety, and frankly, May wasn't one to take care of things.
"Well, you see, technically it's mine. You only use it 'cause I don't feel like finding where we are, myself. Besides…" She started slyly, "I know what happened to the other one…"
"Huh?" He choked.
"You of all people should know…" She continued, flipping the device open.
"W-what are you talking about?" Max stuttered nervously.
"Ughh… You can't even remember?" Max's eyes were wide and his heart was pumping. If she knew, why hadn't she started killing him now? He gave no response. "Munchlax ate it!" Max facefell in confusion.
"What are you talking about!" He shouted.
"I know you must've fed munchlax the other one, this one has a different label!" She scolded.
"May, that makes no sense. Why would you—" He was interrupted by May's gasp and expression.
"What…?" She stood still, mouth agape, tears forming at the edges of her lids. He grabbed the navigator in his haste, and scanned the small screen. His pupils dilated as well. "We're—At Santa's house…" He mumbled, unsure. If Santa was where they were standing, where was the house, the elves, the smell of industry and cookies? It all led to the same reasoning. "Santa isn't real." Max's head dropped, and May's tears dotted the snow.
"But… My book…" She practically fell to the ground, flipping through the pages for evidence. Max snatched it from the snow and looked at the cover. He slapped his forehead in stupidity.
"May, you moron… Haven't you even READ the title?"
"Of course!" She retorted, glaring at him. Max sighed. "What? I even remember the name! The Unbelievable Tales of Christmas; a Fiction Novel!"
"Do you even UNDERSTAND the title?" He asked angrily, looking at their surroundings.
"Yeah! It's a Christmas story!"
"A FICTION story," He corrected.
"Oh yeah. Um, what's fiction mean again?" She asked, sweatdropping.
"Fake, May. Fake."
"I thought that was nonfiction!" She countered.
"No May, no. We've traveled miles to get to the North Pole, are now considered murderers because of that little "accident" earlier, passed friends and foes, forced your pokemon against their wills, and almost fell into the frigid waters of the Arctic, just to find out Santa Claus isn't real. That really is sad."
"Ho ho whoa!" May contradicted. "Then who gives is presents at night?"
"Mom and Dad."
"Who eats the Christmas cookies that late?"
"Mom and Dad."
"Who stuffs their fat selves down the chimney to break into people's houses?"
"Mom and—Wait, people don't do that!"
"Impossible," May murmured, unbelieving. "Mom and Dad do that all in one night… before 12, Christmas cookies and all…" She looked down in despair. "And now we're stuck in the North Pole for who knows how long!"
"And delibirds only live in the South Pole…" Max informed.
"HOW ARE WE SUPPOSED TO GET OUT OF HERE?" She cried to the sky, hoping this was some sort of mistake.
"Well, let's go, we're wasting time," Max ordered, walking along the snowy hills.
"Wait! We're just gonna walk?" She demanded.
"No May, we're gonna fly." She looked at him bewildered. "Of course we're going to walk! C'mon!" She reluctantly agreed, and the two trudged onward, to find home, wherever that was. They knew they couldn't possibly make it, with no food or water. The North Pole was only even found on the pokenav because it started on the very northern tip of Hoenn. May coughed.
"We're not going to make it," She sniveled.
"Stop being pessimistic."
"We're NEVER going to make it!" She cried. Max groaned, now he would have to listen to May complain. The snow had already worsened, and Max had to continuously scrape the snow from his glasses. He stopped, abruptly.
"Look!" Max gasped, pointing towards a faint gray outline from afar. May squinted and made out the large factory type building.
"Hurry!" Max shouted, trotting through the deep snow, careful not to trip on any ice.
"I'm coming!" She answered hoarsely, following suit. The wind looked as if it were defending the terrain they were about to pass on, and stood as a barrier against them. Max fell to his knees in the snow, and May hurried to his side. Unfortunately, the cold caused her to become delirious, and she fell to the hard cold ground at once.
---
"Mmm… Huh?" Max rose from his position and yawned. His eyes examined their surroundings, for the last thing he remembered was blacking out. "May?"
"Hm?" She asked, from the other end of the sleigh. Max's eyes widened after May had harnessed combusken to the sled and held the straps.
"What are you doing?"
"Tying combusken to the sled."
"Why?" He emphasized.
"We're going to the North Pole!" She reminded, sitting beside him.
"Déjà vu?" Max questioned.
"What?" May asked, handing him the straps.
"May! This is stupid… Even if we do get to the North Pole, what if Santa's not there?" He asked.
"Why wouldn't he be?"
"Because," Max started, "He isn't real."
"You believe Dad too? Max, Max, Max…" She sighed, shaking her head. Max stood and slipped out of the sled.
"Maybe I do! I think this whole thing is ridiculous!" He shouted, heading home.
"Wait! You can't just leave me here! I need somebody to come with me! Do you WANT to end up on the naughty list? Max… Max? MAX!" And with that, their Christmas dilemma ended, May still hoping for Max to change his mind. When he didn't, she sighed sadly and continued on her own.
---
"Santa… Oh Santa, where are you?" May asked, trudging through the snow. "SANTA!" She started getting impatient. Scanning the terrain, only hills of snow were visible. The wind started to quicken, and the snow fell heavily. "It can't be… Santa WASN'T REAL? NOOOOOOO!"
---
"Wahh!" May shouted, awaking from her winter slumber. "A dream… It was only a dream…" She laughed it off, rising. "Wait a minute… WHERE AM I?" She shouted after discovering the room she occupied wasn't anything like her real room.
"Ho ho whoa, you're awake, May!" A hefty man called. "Don't be upset, Christmas is only a day away!" May stared at him, almost fainting. Before her stood a large, red-coated man, with a white beard and red hat. She withdrew from her shock with a random comment.
"Ha, wait till I tell Max!" She laughed it off. This would be a Christmas mystery no one would ever imagine. Remember, if you're ever lost in the North Pole, just turn that last corner where the ice disappears, and keep in mind, you've encountered the Twilight Zone.