AN: Hello everyone :) Don't worry, I'll try to Keep this short so you can go on with the story, or you simply skip this part n.n''
As you might notice, seeing my other Fanfictions, I'm not a Cartoons and Comics Person. Actually I used to be an only Manga and Anime type, but that was before I decided to re-watch Teen Titans and then it went to Young Justice and I have to admit I definitely don't regret having watched it. Especially the first season was great :) That started everything here and I am happy to have finally crossed the border and threaded the new grounds, called Cartoons and Comics. So, here I am, nice to meet you all :) I hope that my lack of knowledge doesn't bother you. I really did a lot of Research, but I unfortunately can't catch up with years worth of reading within a few weeks. Therefore, this fanfiction will be kind if AU. Some characters might even seem OOC. Please feel free to tell me so. I'm always open for constructive criticism. I won't bite your heads off ;3 Another thing that I want to apologize for beforehand is the fact that there are some slip ups concerning the language. I'm no native Speaker ^-^; but I do try my best. So, well, I won't stall any more. The first and foremost thing I wish you to have while reading this Story is to enjoy it. That's the actual meaning behind it all ;) have fun.
For further Information please PM me or visit my page that has to be cleaned up. 's so chaotic... C:
PS: If you are honestly not interested in the OC skip until the first pagebreak. It's your loss though if you don't really grasp the concept of her n.n''
Disclaimer: I don't own anything, besides my OC and the plot
What is suicide?
It was an unusually hot and humid summer night. The air was thick and almost threateningly suffocating. The sun had just bid the surface farewell, only to be quickly replaced by a beautifully glowing moon, its luminescence illuminating the world beneath it and immersing the scenery in mysterious but beauteous silver light. It seemed as if all colour had been sucked out of the world and yet the atmosphere was filled with everything but discomfort. Instead it was rather quite tranquil.
Countless stars adorned heaven's tent and delighted it with their sole presence. A breathtaking play was taking place upon the endless blue canvas called sky. One after another they flared up, briefly lighting the area around them, before fading back to their former brightness. It seemed like an ever changing spectacle, one was more than appealed to watch.
It was especially in these kinds of nights, that she was drawn to the outside. Any kind of building felt too small, too-... crushing, simply too restricting. She just couldn't stand that kind of cornered feeling. She loved freedom. She loved the soft wind caressing her bare skin and tousling her hair and she loved sitting somewhere isolated, watching the indescribably mesmerizing nature. She had never been a city-girl. She could never imagine living far off from any kind of forest or field. Taking a walk through the usually green places always gave her a slight comfort, like a strong hand, holding her down to earth when she was about to lose her footing. She was afraid, that if she were to lose this crutch, she would also lose herself - lose the only thing that kept her sane; from falling apart at worst.
In front of others, she kept up that cheerful and collected facade. She was the strong girl in so many aspects: Always smiling, always happy, strong-willed and always nice. However, that was just that, a facade. Had it not been for her regular strolls, her mask would have long since been ripped off of her face, making everyone aware of her actually vulnerable self. It had not always been that way and she could still clearly remember the days she used to spend in her room without even bothering to spare the outside world with just one glance like it had been only a day ago. Weeks had passed, she reminded herself. Weeks. And she still found herself in front of 'that grave' every time she went for a walk, even if she didn't aim for it. She actually never had a destination when she went out to get some fresh air. Nonetheless, her wanderings always led her back to that one place and that was where she was now. She was crouched in front of a tombstone, her fingertips gingerly tracing the engraved words.
Serenety Aura
A loving daughter
An irreplaceable sister
A unique friend
and free soul
May she rest in peace
A lump formed inside her throat, once again leaving her with a drowning and at the same time unbearable hot sensation. It felt like someone had forced her under a steaming sea of water. Her heart began to race and her whole body was trembling. She had to swallow more than once to keep herself from suffocating. Her sight was blurred by her watering eyes, soon threatening to flow over. She blinked once, then twice. By the time she finally suppressed the urge to cry, she had lost count. She couldn't be weak. No, she just wasn't allowed to. Someone had to stay strong for her parents. Someone had to be the supporting pillar of the instable, if not already crumbling, house.
She swiftly took back her hand as if the stone was on fire. It was the final resting place of her only sister. She had always taken her for granted and now that she was gone, she couldn't help but notice the big gaping hole inside her heart. Before, she would never have admitted that her sister had taken such a big place in her heart, not even to herself. The more shocking came her death - The moment she had lost the ground beneath her feet; the moment someone had taken her beautiful and ignorant picture of life and ripped it into many little shreds. No matter how much they had argued and no matter how much they had gotten onto each other's nerves, they had always been inseparable; The best example for the 'opposites attract' kind of relationship. It was like a part of her had died with the older girl and was now buried together under a deep heap of earth - buried beneath a place that was never supposed to be opened again.
She was gone. Gone for good and so was her former self. The person she saw in her reflection these days was someone she didn't know anymore - a stranger - and yet every time she laid her gaze upon a mirror, she felt an indescribably powerful rage bubbling up in her stomach. Those indifferent eyes looking back at her, made her seethe with anger - if not more. How could she be heartless enough to treat someone's-, her sister's death, like it was a daily occurrence?! It didn't bother her at all; at least, she looked like she honestly wasn't disturbed by the fact, that she had so much blood on her hands, at all.
A maniac smile pulled on her lips, as her nails mercilessly dug into the tender flesh of her palms. Yes, it was her fault - her fault alone that the person lying under her feet was no more. Had she not been that difficult on purpose, perhaps this would never have happened. She had only been joking around, never meaning for something like this to happen. She had driven her sister to her own death and she wasn't going to deny it. Oh no. She was brutally aware of her part in this and was going to take full responsibility for her actions. Having been left with two mourning parents, she was the only one who could possibly stop them from shattering into many little pieces. If that were to happen, there was no way for her to put them back together.
However, with each passing day, she could practically see the end approaching. She was tired and there was no energy left to keep on mending the crumbling pieces of her family back together. They were simply growing apart. She had lost that kind of special connection she once had with her parents. It felt like they weren't really looking at her-, at their daughter anymore. She was the reason their beloved child had died, her murderer. It was more than understandable that they would distance themselves from her and she respected their decision to give her space. It wasn't like the freedom was not appreciated. The sudden change of demeanor had just felt like being-… thrown away, like a broken toy. Usually they would have never allowed her to leave home at night, but now... they didn't even utter a simple goodbye when she went out the door. It stung. Every time she spoke to her parents, only to see that their eyes were filled with fear and anger, she couldn't help but feel betrayed, like someone had pierced her back with a dagger over and over again. She couldn't do this anymore. Suicide had crossed her mind many times by now, but she was too much of a coward to go through with it and she didn't deserve to be freed from her agony anyways. Who was she to complain? At least she still had parents. She knew that she could always be worse off. Little did she know just how quickly things would start spiraling downwards.
She heaved a sigh and forced herself to stand up, her head hung low. This was not the reason she had come here, but she also knew that she couldn't possibly stop her mind from wandering off at the sight of her grave. It would have made her a hypocrite, not that she wasn't one already and even if she wasn't, after this day, or night to be precise, she would surely be more than worthy of carrying that title. The thought of her former life motto made her scoff. Do as you would be done? Yeah right, and what kind of dream world had she been living in? There was no way she could do that anymore and no way she would do so willingly. She had always put the greatest effort into treating everyone in the gentlest way. Not even once had she let her mood come in the way of it, but just like she had done with her sister, everyone had taken it for granted. She had a lot of friends, but none of them being close. None of them had wanted to keep her closer than an arm length, metaphorically. She had always been the second choice; the sweet girl who wouldn't even dare to hurt a fly; the one they could rely on to be there when they needed her the most and trust to never get angry at them for not doing the same. It hurt so much, knowing that she would probably never have someone close enough to call a sibling and yet she bore with the harrowing truth and obediently played the cheerful and encouraging friend. However, it would all be over soon. She had already taken her first step towards a new life.
She would leave this very night.
Carefully, she took one step after another away from the place she had been standing in front of, scared that if she went to fast, she would disturb the resting souls. It was time. She had to go now, or she would never be able to find the courage again. She threw one last glance at the name carved on the big stone and then swiftly turned around, gritting her teeth. This would be the last time she came to visit her sister. It was a silent goodbye, different than the last one. She could still hear her wrenching scream echoing inside her head. It was shrill and sickening. A shudder shook her entire body. She had to stop thinking about it! It was in the past now and there was nothing she could change. It was final. She was dead.
Her feet felt like lead, getting even heavier and heavier with every step. Her gut was doing uncomfortable flip-flops, causing her to feel queasy and goose bumps to appear all over her skin. Something was wrong, so very wrong; something in the back of her mind told her to head home no matter how ridicules it sounded - told her to get it together. She couldn't just up and leave without a single notice. It would be more than against her morals. It would be a downright contradiction with her being itself, but on the other hand she was virtually petrified of the thought of having to face them again. She didn't want to be the reason of their anguish... She took a deep breath. At least, she didn't want to see their sorrowful faces and know that it was no one else but her, who had taken away their last bit of sanity. She would be nothing less than the people she despised the most: people who would selfishly force themselves into the center of attention without giving a second thought to those they hurt in the process. No, she refused to stoop that low. She would go back and explain herself to her parents. She didn't want them to think that she hated them; that they were the only reason she decided to leave. On the contrary, she loved them unconditionally. They were the ones to give her her life, to raise her to the person she was now and give her a future. Those deeds were invaluable and no matter what, she would never be able to come even close to repaying them. It was true that the gap between her and them had already grown too large for her to return to them and they didn't acknowledge her as their daughter anymore, but she would never hurt them, if she could help it - and that she could.
With an annoyed glare, she stared down at the shoulder bag lazily pressing against her upper leg. She had everything packed, ready to go off on her quest to start a new life. It was the right decision, was it not? NO! Gosh, no! She couldn't start doubting herself now. She had made a choice and would not go back on her word.
A defeated sigh escaped her lips as she finally exited the graveyard, taking the shortest route towards the place she had called home for years. It wasn't far away. Actually, she only had to scale down the hill that she had halfway been on. Perhaps this was the reason she always ended up in front of her sister's tombstone. Perhaps...
Her thoughts trailed off at the sight that was presenting itself in front of her. Lights. Many dazzling blue lights filled her vision. She tensed. This wasn't a good sign. Those lights were never a good sign and they were right in front of the entrance to the apartment complex she used to live in. Without thinking, she frantically pushed through the gaping crowd of people. How so many people had got there in the first place was a mystery to her. It was one o' clock in the morning for god's sake! Shouldn't they be, like, asleep?
Pushing aside the snarky remarks, that were obviously caused by her scattered state of mind, she dashed up the stairs that lead to her parent's apartment. She kept on denying the possibility of them being the root of this uproar. They couldn't be. There was no reason for the police to pay her parents a visit in the middle of the night, unless-. A shiver ran down her spine. She didn't even want to finish the thought. It-, it would ruin everything. It would mean the end of a world that, she dare say, she enjoyed living in. If that happened, she would lose the last thing that kept her from giving up; that kept her from going insane!
Soundlessly, she climbed up the last few stairs, eventually coming face to face with the door she had passed so many times before. Only this time she didn't feel so eager to do so. It was open. She licked her lips in anticipation, her mouth running dry at the sight. A heavy dread weightened down on her stomach, making it almost painful to breathe. So this was it. She couldn't continue with the lies, when the truth was presenting itself right in front of her like this. They were in her former home and that she could not deny. She swallowed hard against the will of her own body and blinked once... twice, before heading inside. Immediately the air temperature dropped to a degree that was more than suffocating. Something was off. It didn't feel like the place she had known so well at all, but no matter how many times she scanned the area around her, she couldn't find anything different about it. Everything was in place. For what seemed like an eternity, she simply stood there and stared into space, a train of thoughts running through her mind in a head splitting pace.
Suddenly, the voices of men resonated from her right, breaking her concentration. She narrowed her eyes and in one motion she was standing in front of the kitchen.
No.
Her breath got caught in her throat as her gaze fell upon the scene before her eyes.
No!
Uncontrollable shaking took over her entire body. She felt hot and cold at the same time.
NO!
All of a sudden her vision went red. Everything was red, red, RED! This couldn't be happening! This-, this wasn't supposed to happen! This had to be a dream!
The urge to hit something rushed through her body, almost sending her over the edge. Her muscles twitched, ready to strike anything that came in their way. Rage. It was pure rage flowing through her veins and slowly causing her to lose control.
No...
She forced her tense muscles to relax again and released a breath she didn't know she was holding. She wasn't one to vent her spleen on somebody. She never showed her anger and more so not in front of innocent people. Those policemen had nothing to do with her situation. They hadn't even noticed her yet.
She. Was not. An angry. Person.
Fully convinced by her own words, she really did calm down, the boiling wrath inside her slowly dissipating, but at the same time realization dawned on her. It felt like a hard blow to her gut, leaving her winded.
They were dead.
She let out a shaky breath. It took everything out of her to just focus her gaze on the two blood soaked corpses on the ground. They were pale, almost looking like they would turn into dust at the simplest touch. The eyes stared into thin air, already glassy.
No.
She could feel herself on the brink to hyperventilating again, but at this point she didn't even care anymore. All she wanted was to disappear. She wished that she had never existed in the first place. They would have been better off without her. She wasn't worth living. This wouldn't even have happened if she hadn't existed. Her presence was unwelcomed. She had to leave and that she did.
Ignoring the fact that the men littered across the apartment would most likely notice her as soon as she stopped being discreet with her movements, she sprinted out, back to where she had been before all of this had occurred. She needed fresh air to sort out her mind only that this time she had shouting men hot on her tail, their voices dull and drowned out by her own deafening thoughts. To her it sounded like they weren't speaking her language anymore. She couldn't understand a thing, even if she wanted to. What did they want from her? She had nothing, nothing at all. She was but a simple girl. A simple orphaned girl... A hiccup escaped her lips.
They were dead.
They were dead, they were dead, theyweredead!
She shook her head repeatedly, her hands pressed against her ears and eyes clenched shut. She didn't want to hear it. She didn't want to see those cruel pictures popping up in her mind anymore! Couldn't all of this just be a dream? A really, really bad dream?
She turned a corner, running into a circle of narrow pathways. Knowing the place like the back of her hands, she ducked into one that was leading to many different places. That way, the police wouldn't be able to get her by car.
This was the longest she had ever run. Her whole body was on fire. Even her eyes burned awfully. She wouldn't be able to hold on much longer. Thinking quickly, she led her predators into a cornfield, losing them inside the high maize plants. She didn't have time for this. She wanted to be alone! She didn't want anyone near her when she was in this kind of state. She was supposed to be strong, to be the supporting pillar. Now she was falling apart herself. She could literally feel someone tearing her apart from the insides, ripping out big pieces without replacing them. It felt horrible. A major headache was on its way and she felt like throwing up, which wouldn't be very graceful inside a field with people searching for her. She had to get away first. But where to? In the end, she ended up on a tree inside a forest. They wouldn't find her that quickly here.
Sighing in fatigue, she leaned against the trunk and put her bag in front of her. This was all happening too fast. Her head hadn't even caught up with what was the present. It all felt so surreal, but then again... She shook her head. It didn't matter anymore, now did it? They were all gone - gone and never to return again. She didn't even have the chance to say goodbye, to say she cared; to say thank you and... I love you.
She felt her heart aching for the little gestures of her family - those smiles, filled with love, those simple pats on her head or shoulder, the way her mother and sister would carefully tug at her hair to braid it, the way her father would hold her hands to warm them up when she was cold, those hugs they gave her when she felt discouraged... All those little things, she would never experience them again. Never. She could still feel their touches lingering on her skin. It felt like being on fire.
Quiet sobs racked her body as tears ran down her face. She was the only one that was left. Everyone she cared for had died, died in front of her very eyes. She pulled up her legs, laying her head on the top and holding them in place with her arms securely wrapped around them. Her bag pressed into her stomach. She was all alone now. She could do as she wished, but somehow she felt lost instead of grateful, lost and confused. What was she supposed to do now? Without her family she was nothing, nothing but an empty shell...
She didn't know how long she had sat there in total silence, before she uncurled herself and rummaged the satchel, a sorrowful expression distorting her face. If they were gone, she had no reason to stay anymore. She may be acting rash and wrongheaded right now and on a whim, but she didn't have it in her anymore to stop herself from doing something most would deem very stupid and cowardly.
Finally finding what she was looking for, she pulled out two little boxes: Painkillers and sleeping pills. She didn't hesitate once, as she emptied the contents. One by one she popped out the pills from their packaging, letting them fall onto her shaking hands.
Would it be painful?
She closed her hands around the medications as the last one made its way onto her palm.
Would... Would someone miss her? Notice that she was gone?
Swiftly, she got a bottle of juice from her bag, determined to do what she was planning to.
Probably not.
She forced as many as possible into her mouth, the bitter taste causing her to gag.
She hadn't told her parents goodbye this night.
The bottle easily found its way to her blue lips, ruthlessly being tilted upwards by freezing hands.
She wouldn't say goodbye to anyone...
She coughed. Many little pills were going down her oesophagus. It felt disgusting, downright nasty.
She would die... alone, just like always... alone, misunderstood, ignored...
Suddenly, her leg slipped and she toppled from the branch she was sitting on. Everything was going in slow motion. Would this be the end? Truly the end? Somehow she didn't feel as confident anymore, but ultimately it didn't matter. The only certain thing in life is death and that she would welcome with open arms, even if not the way she had planned to. It was her only escape from this wretched world.
'I won't say goodbye.'
Closing her eyes, she patiently awaited the impact of the ground.
'This is my way of saying I quit fucking world. Go to hell for all I care.'
Then everything was gone. Her vision instantly turned black, as a sickening crunch echoed through the empty woods. The last thing that could be heard was a last heart-wrenching sob.
It was just a usual day in Dick Grayson's life. He had gone to school in the morning, hung out with his friends after and then went on patrol in Gotham with Bruce. Nothing noteworthy had happened. Nothing out of the ordinary, not even the slightest slip up, but it was especially on these kinds of days that something went wrong. It didn't have to be bad, per se. Nonetheless, he preferred to be on the safer side. After all, he wasn't Robin for nothing. The whole night he had been extra alert of his surroundings, double checking each alleyway and much to his dislike, his precautions had been verified when Bruce had received a sudden call from Alfred, informing him of a disturbance of the atmosphere. Something, or rather someone had forced their way into this world. This wasn't the first time they dealt with time-travelers or dimension-hoppers, but usually those kinds of persons had left their reality voluntarily to wreck havoc across another world, or simply take it over like all of the stereotype villains. However, what he found instead caused his insides to twist with nausea and agony.
Cowering between trashcans was a young girl. She looked horribly beaten. Nevertheless, the first thing he noticed was how black her hair was. It wasn't like his own dark shade, but deeper, almost like a black hole, threatening to pull the nearest thing inside, may it be object or living being. It was messy and lifelessly splayed across her body, effectively hiding most of it. She looked so alone, so disturbingly broken. He didn't think twice before skillfully stepping forward, not a single sound resonating. He was scared that the slightest noise would startle the girl. She was shaking like a leaf in the wind. He could literally feel the fear and pain radiating from her. This kind of feeling... It was indescribable, but he knew it just too well: The utter emptiness after having experienced a great loss, the sorrow and wrath. No one could fake those kinds of feelings. He out of all people should know that, for he himself had gone through the same agony.
As slowly and gentle as possible, he crouched down and put a reassuring hand on her shoulder. He could feel her whole body tense up immediately, as she jerked away, only causing her to crash into the next bin. An almost inaudible wince escaped her lips, but being who he was, he noticed. His expression softened. She looked like a little scared cat, crawling away from him like that.
"Don't worry. I won't hurt ya."
His voice was smooth and calm, trying to soothe the girl enough for him to get her without having to force her to hold still. He didn't want her to unnecessarily hurt herself. She was still a civilian, even if not from around here, he was supposed to protect civilians. Bruce wouldn't approve if he let that girl die on his watch, not that he would. Thinking of Bruce, where was he? He should have been here by now, with him missing for so long, or was the Batman losing his touch? A cackle echoed through the alleyway.
Robin, once again, scanned his surroundings, before his gaze fell upon something that caused his throat to close up. His eyes widened at the sight, but they quickly reverted back to their original size. Still, he was left slightly stumped. So empty. He gulped. He had never seen such empty eyes. It was like all life had been sucked out of them, only leaving behind a shallow shell. They were blue, he noted. Just like his', but at the same time they weren't. Instead of a curious and playful glint sparkling inside a warm pool of blue, something in those swirls of icy shades caused shivers to crawl down ones back in an horribly uncomfortable way.
Shaking the thoughts out of his head he, once again, tried to approach the girl, his movements careful and deliberately foreseeable. He could see her pressing herself further into the metal behind her, a bag securely pressed to her upper body.
"It's fine." He stated, his hand finally finding its place on her shoulder once again. She still hadn't calmed, but she seemed willing enough to let him get near. Now that he could see her close up, he noticed how awfully pale she was and all those little cuts littered across her skin. What had happened before she had left her reality? Did someone attack her? Had been the victim of someone that wanted to test a new technology? A lab rat?
His thoughts were interrupted as he felt an all too familiar glare boring into the back of his head. A certain bat had finally found its way to his partner's location and was now standing right behind him, his eyes narrowing at the redundant person present. Robin turned to meet his mentor's glare, his hand squeezing the girl's shoulder in comfort. He knew 'The Batman' could be quite the intimidating man and his stern voice didn't help the cause. On the contrary, it made some his enemies shrink away at the sheer sound of it. Unfortunately, it had the same effect on other people. He felt weak and freezing fingers grasping his still outstretched arm, trembling with what could have been bleakness or agitation. They were searching for some sort of security - any kind of security. That sure did only confirm his statement, but at least the girl trusted him to protect her now.
"She needs medical attention." His countenance was serious, daring the taller man to object. Even if he did, he wouldn't accept a no anyways. He had his ways to get what he wanted. Alfred, for example, would never decline his wishes, at least as long as they wouldn't harm him or the bat. However, his musings were proven to be of no purpose as he suddenly saw a shadow passing him and delicately picking the girl up, her hands easily peeled off him with almost no effort. The boy wonder could only gape in disbelief. It wasn't often that the 'Dark Knight' would show such-, such - he couldn't find the right word - instinctive feelings? The muscular man was careful, as she thrashed relentlessly, which wasn't much of a problem to the broadly built man. Her hands barely formed fists, but she still found the strength to hit him repeatedly. However, the force behind those was comparable to a fly simply landing on an elephant's head - meaning, none at all. The only thing she achieved was tiring herself out to the point that she passed out from exhaustion. That was when the tall man decided to move, her body almost as limp as a corpse.
Robin followed without a comment, really wanting to leave the place they were in behind. The Batmobile was never far away, thus shortening the time they had to spend on getting to it. As soon as he sat down on the passenger seat, Bruce cautiously placed the sleeping girl onto his lap. His hands instinctively wrapped themselves around the frail frame, one supporting the head and preventing it from taking further damage, the other lifting up the legs, making room for the Bat to drive.
Of course, there was still the possibility of the girl not being on their side, but with her sleeping so soundly in his arms, he just couldn't believe that she was anything but good. He could actually feel her breathing against him, her breath irregular and too ragged. She was having trouble getting air. It could indicate a damaged lung or wind pipe. Her skin felt cold to the touch, almost freezing and her lips were almost as blue as her eyes. This was never a good sign. That was highly likely the result of blood loss. May it be internal or outward, though he was sure of the former, considering the lack of the crimson liquid on the girl.
Robin couldn't resist stroking the long black mane, that was adoring the girl's head. They were smooth, devoid of any knots despite the messy state they were in. Something about her was intriguing. Was it the fact that she shared some attributes with him? Or that kind of agony, both of them had experienced. He couldn't tell. All he knew was that she had caught his interest. She was an enigma and he loved solving problems. It was a perfect fit.
Too soon, they pulled into a familiar place. The Batcave. So Bruce had decided to let Alfred check up the girl first instead of throwing her into a bunch of meta-humans that would probably scare her even more than she already was. It was the best choice he could have made, even if that meant having a risk of their identities being found. They could still just send her back to her world, which they had to do anyways because of the disruption her presence caused, as soon as she knew too much, but – he looked down at the curled up bundle in his arms - he didn't just want to send her back to a place that did this to her. No matter what she did, no one deserved such torture.
Before he could process it, someone had taken the weight off his lap.
"Get Alfred." A low voice resonated in an ordering tone.
"If you wanted me out of the cave, you could've just told me so." Robin knew better than to disobey a Batman, whose patience was wearing thin. Within the blink of the eye he was gone, hurrying over to the Wayne Mansion. He knew that Bruce had long since contacted the butler slash family friend. How could he not, with some stranger entering the Batcave.
It didn't take that long to find who he was looking for. Alfred was always there when he needed him and always knew just what to do. The man was already carrying change of clothes- were those his trackies and Bruce's shirt? - And a tray with what he assumed was chicken soup over to one of the the entrances to the Batcave.
"Alfred!" He jogged over to him, taking big strides. "We found the cause of it. You gotta take a look!"
"I have already been informed of the current situation Master Dick. I will do the best I can to help her, but you mustn't get your hopes up, from what Master Bruce has told me the chances of her survival nearly non-existent." His voice was as calm as it always was, successfully steadying the jumpy boy, but at the same time causing him to stiffen up. She was going to die? That was impossible! She didn't look that bad! He bit down on his lower lip, slightly chewing on it. Her death would be anything but fair! How old was she anyways? She didn't seem that much older than him! Maybe around Wally's age. Oh god. He had to refrain from wincing as the possibility of his best friend's death crossed his mind. Too young! They were still way too young! Both, Wally and that girl. He couldn't just stand by and watch as she slowly passed away when he was able to something about it, even if, in the end, it wasn't enough. He would know that he had at least tried. 'You gotta stay traught Robin. You're not being yourself.'
"Now why don't you get changed and help yourself to a cup of hot chocolate? You certainly look exhausted. Master Bruce and I will take care of everything." Alfred was smiling down at him, patiently waiting for a response. He could see that the man knew that he wasn't going to listen to him.
"You know me Al. You can't keep me away from a mission." He grinned mischievously, craning his neck slightly to look up at the taller man. "I'm just that awesome."
Dick could practically see the other sigh and shaking his head at his antics to hack the system only to get into the Batcave uninvited. No one, except for maybe the Bat himself could stop him from doing so.
"Master Bruce is momentarily testing the girl's blood." Before he could even finish the sentence, the younger boy had already sprinted away, only just yelling back a 'Thanks Alfred, you're the best!'.
If Batman was checking the girl's blood levels, he should be able to easily sneak in without being noticed. He should be occupied with the tests.
Silently, he went through the entrance behind the old grandfather's clock and skillfully slipped into the shadows. He could perfectly see the person he was looking for from where he was hiding. She was awake and listlessly staring into space. Her limp body was tied to the examination bed he knew so well from all those times he had to sit on it. Next to it was her shoulder bag that she had held onto like a lifeline. What could possibly be in there to make her this protective over it? His hands itched with anticipation as curiosity sparked inside of him. Maybe she had something that would identify her in it. He inched closer and to the lighted area, but jerked away as soon as he could hear his mentor approaching.
"She has had a high overdose of soporific and analgesic. Her body has yet to start discomposing it. The probability of the medication slowly shutting off her senses one by one is high. She has bruises across her back, a fractured rib and arm. Apparently, it was not third party negligence." The deep voice echoed through the cave, leaving behind a bitter taste inside a certain eavesdropper's mouth. His whole posture froze in place. He knew exactly what all of that meant and it sure made him feel sick to the stomach. It was hard to picture this little girl lying there so lifelessly committing something as gruesome as that, something inexcusable and unretractable, something most knew as... suicide. He caught his breath. She had wanted to die. She had chosen death over life. What kind of life must she have been leading to cause her to fall so far. Had no one been there to catch her and help her up again? Was there no one who at least told her not to give up? Had she been all alone when she had made her decision? - When she lost the ground beneath her feet? He didn't even dare to imagine how he would have turned out, had Batman not been there to steady his feet and show him a path he hadn't been aware of he could take: The path of a Hero - A hero, that prevented bad thing from happening; that saved and helped innocent people; a hero that would be there when one needed him...
"You have done everything humanly possible to help her Sir. All we can do now is hope that she is a warrior by nature. It is up to her whether she will overcome this hard time, or chooses to live a life as a hollow shell." Alfred was standing right in front of the girl, the clothes and food he had brought with him neatly placed on the table beside him. He was eyeing her with a sad expression, his hands already working to unclasp the straps she had been tied to the bed with utmost care. "I will make sure that she will stay alive long enough for her to make the choice herself."
"Just what would I do without you Alfred." Dick could hear the younger man let out a sigh of relief. The Bat put all of his faith and trust into their one and only butler. If there was someone that they could trust it was good ol' Alfred. The thought of him taking care of things here put his mind at ease as well. If he couldn't do it, no one could. With that in mind he slipped further back to the exit, only stopping to shoot one last glance at the scene. Bruce was gone and the older man was gently washing the dirt off the girl's skin. She was even paler than he had first assumed. Her skin was sheet white and he could see old scars running all over it. They didn't look like clean cut and somehow, in a weird way, it relieved him. They hadn't been caused by any kind of blade.
Shaking his head, he eventually headed to his room. He had been awake for too long. He really should catch some shut eye, or he would end up with a major headache, which would be everything but whelming.
School was horrible. Totally and downright cruelly boring! The night had passed in a blur. He couldn't even remember when he had gone to sleep, but this was disastrous! - heavy on the dis. Yeah, he knew he was being melodramatic, but really, he was other wisely occupied, for example with that certain cause of dimension disruption obliviously chilling in the Batcave. After a good night's sleep he had the time to sort out his mind and you wouldn't believe how many questions had suddenly popped up! Sure, he probably wouldn't get a single word out of her, but that was more the reason to get her back on her feet and anyways, he couldn't keep on calling her 'the girl'.
It felt like an eternity until the bell finally rang, announcing the end of the school day - at least his school day. He couldn't wait for Alfred to pick him up! There was a slight bounce in his step as he headed for the gates. He could see Artemis also leaving the school grounds from the corner from his eye. She was most likely going to see the team. He himself had taken a day off. It was too early to tell them about her. She wasn't strong enough to handle any more excitement yet. As soon as he deemed her ready to handle Kid Mouth, he would tell the others about her. God, he had to stop thinking that far. What if she had to be sent back, or worse, she didn't make it? Dick growled in frustration. Why did it all have to be so complicated? Why wasn't life just... you know? Easy?
"Good afternoon, Master Dick. Did you have an enjoyable day at school?" The always reliable man was standing beside an opened door, waiting for him to enter.
"Nothing is more enjoyable than the thought of going home. No, scratch that."He smiled in a lopsided way as he entered the vehicle. "Nothing is more enjoyable than the cookies you make."
"Why thank you, Young Master. What do I owe these kind words?" The man closed the door and went to the driver's seat. "Perhaps you wish to pay a certain someone a visit?"
He knew. Of course he knew. He had expected nothing less from Alfred. A content smile tugged on his lips, his head comfortably leaning into the soft cushion of the seat. "You know it Al."
"I have prepared noodle soup, if you wish to have lunch with her. However, she has slipped into a state of catatonia." The engine started. "You need not be impatient with her Master Dick." His voice was dead serious. This made the teen look up. The serene man was rarely this sober and when he was it usually was something you didn't take on the light shoulder. Dick simply nodded and smiled cheerfully like he always did. The whole ride back to the mansion was filled with energetic chatter from his side. He was simply excited to finally see the girl and try all his theories on her. She was still new and unknown. It wouldn't take too long for his eagerness to die down. That didn't mean his curiosity would! He would still want to find out who caused all of this misery and bring them to justice.
When Alfred had told him that the girl was caught in a state of catatonia, he hadn't given it a second thought, but now that he was here, right next to her, he couldn't help but feel disturbed by the sheer look in her eyes. She seemed so dead, just like the first time he had caught her gaze, only this time, she didn't show any signs of being alive despite the obvious fact that she was breathing. 'Okay Rob. You can't back out now. Stay whelmed.'
Clad in his Robin outfit, he plopped himself down on the bed, his feet loosely swaying back and forth."Hey."'Couldn't have thought of anything lamer, Rob.' He inwardly groaned at his idiocy. "I'm Robin. It's nice to meet ya." She didn't even blink at his introduction, let alone breathe differently! It was as if she didn't see him at all.
"You know, Agent A made some soup just for you. He's an awesome cook. You should try it." Again his comment fell onto deaf ears, leaving him to wonder if she was even awake. Tentatively, he leaned over, closely examining her. He had to admit that behind all those bruises, scars and bandages was a quite normal girl. She seemed like the go-with-the-flow type: unnoticeable and quiet - Those who usually don't get into this kind of situations, because they never risk being a target. Robin gently pushed away a strand of her pitch black hair from her face. He wondered what these eyes would look like if life was sparkling in them. They would surely have been captivating.
"Just what did you do to end up like this?" He leaned back into his original position, his legs taking on their former occupation. "To be honest, I don't really know how I am supposed to have lunch with you, when you're not even moving. It's not like I can force feed you-" He glanced at the bowl of soup sitting on the table. "Perhaps I could."
Almost overcautiously, he propped her into a sitting position, using her pillow as support, though it wasn't needed. She stayed exactly in the position he moved her into, just like a doll one played with. Now that he could see her clearly, he noticed that, besides washing her and changing her clothes, Alfred had also taken the opportunity to comb her hair. It reached down to the bed and instead of being wavy like he had remembered from the day before, it was straight. He could totally imagine Kid Flash being his usual dorky self around her. A chuckle escaped his lips at the image of his best friend hitting on her and getting nothing but a blank stare. However, - he pulled the soup Alfred had prepared for her onto his lap - he could see how much she needed someone to tell her she wasn't unwanted. He led a spoon full of food to the girl's lips. "Now say ahhh~"
It was just meant to be a joke, but to his surprise the girl did obey and he could easily feed her. He couldn't help but laugh. "Ya know, I can already feel that this is going to be a great friendship."
The bowl was soon emptied and Dick had put it back on the table. Now that wasn't as hard as he expected it to be. It seemed like the girl was more than willing to recover and that was definitely good news. With a bit of patience and persistence she was going to be back to full health in no time. Maybe, he could tell Wally after all. Bruce wouldn't be happy about it, but something told him that it was the right thing to do. Yet... Nah, he will tell him next week or something.
Nothing much had changed over the last week only that Robin had been taken out of the team for a while - not like it hadn't happened before - and the fact that he had finally gotten Bats to approve of his idea to tell Wally about the girl. Yes, he was still calling her 'the girl', as she had yet to utter a word, but they were making progress. At least he liked to believe they did. She had gone from liquid food to cookies and buns! He had actually sneaked in some of Alfred's cookies to see if they would do the wonder of shaking her out of her catatonia. Yeah, it was sorta desperate, but hey, he could still hope. He had never been on the patient side, no matter how much Batman had tried to drill it into him. He was chipper, as Alfred liked to say, and could never sit still. Yet, he had made it a daily activity to go down to the Batcave and talk to the girl. He honestly told her about anything that came to his mind: About how much he wanted his best bud to finally meet her; about some of his missions with the Bat; about some of Gotham's villains; about the team and how they came to be, even about the time when he just donned the cape of Robin for the first time. Of course he left out the unpleasant parts. He didn't expect her to say anything, really, and he, as a matter of fact, appreciated her silence. It felt nice having someone to simply listen to him. He didn't need the comfort of words. What he needed was someone he could pour his thoughts onto, without having to worry about how much it would change their opinion on him. She wouldn't look at him with disgust or pity. She would just sit there and listen and that was how he preferred it to be. That didn't mean he wanted her to stay mute and in a stupor! She deserved it to be free of anything that caged her inside her own mind, hence the decision to get his best bud. Wally was more of a people's man than him. He would know how to entice a girl to speak. Sure, Dick knew that the redhead was a hopeless flirt, but Wally always had the best interest in mind. He would never willingly hurt someone. Especially not a girl. Yet, something was just really annoying him to no end. How can a SPEEDSTER be so freaking LATE?! He should have been here an hour ago! Where the heck was that idiot?!
Robin was getting antsy, pacing around the cave. He couldn't believe it. This was the last time he trusted his friend with being punctual! Really now, how hard could it be to come in time only once?!He groaned in frustration, but his fuming was interrupted by an arm slung around his shoulders out of nowhere. "'sup? Missed me already? I am touched."
It was none other than Kid Dork casually leaning against his smaller friend and grinning in his usual bright way. "Sorry for being late, but you know how life is."
"Dude, it's been over an hour!" Robin shoved the ginger off his back, giving him a renowned bat-glare. "What exactly have you been doing?"
"Well, you know-," The taller boy nervously backed away, his hands up in a defensive manner. "This and that and-," His eyes darted around the cave, searching for a distraction as Batman's protégé effectively cornered him, waiting for an answer he knew he didn't have. Suddenly his gaze landed on a certain someone. He would totally have to thank her later for saving him from his best pal. "Is that the girl you've been talking 'bout Rob?" He dashed over to the medical bed as fast as he could, momentarily disappearing from eyesight.
"Duh, do you see any other girl around here?"All anger seemingly forgotten, Robin moved to his friends side, who was taking in the girl's appearance.
"Dude, why didn't you tell me she was such chick?!" Wally's hands gently picked up some strands of her long hair and let them slide through his fingers. "I mean look at this hair! And those eyes! If I didn't know any better, I would've totally thought she was related to you."
"Wally." Dick hissed warningly, his posture rigid.
"I know, I know. 'm sorry Rob." He turned to look at his friend. The dark blue eyes tainted by pain. In one motion, he had his arm back on those too-small shoulders, offering a sort of comfort to the younger boy. Robin appreciated the gesture, leaning into the half-hug. No matter how much of an idiot everyone thought the redhead was, he was actually an absolute genius concerning interpersonal relations - If he wanted to be, that is.
"Is she wearing Batman's shirt and you pants?"
Way to ruin the mood KF.
"No, she's wearing Alfred's clothes." He stared at his friend in disbelief, sarcasm dripping from his every word. "Of course she's wearing Batman's shirt and my pants! What did you expect? It to be the other way around? Fat chance, Kid Dork." Once again he pushed the extra weight off his back, jumping onto the bed himself. The girl was sitting in the same position that she always was in.
"Chillax dude. It was just a question." Kid Flash ducked down, while continuing to talk, having found something interesting. "Is that her bag?"
He was holding up the black satchel that Robin had seen the girl with on the first day. Batman had told him to leave it alone, so he didn't pay it any further attention, but now that it was put into light once more, he couldn't help but wonder what might be inside.
"Yep, it's her's."
Just as they were about to open the zipper, the unexpected happened. A hand shot out, stopping the two from preceding their plans. It was more than obvious that it had been neither of them. They trailed back from the hand over to the arms then to the owner, still not believing what had happened. Silence settled down on the little group of three.
"I thought you said she didn't move." Wally's voice eventually resonated, sounding slightly nervous.
"She didn't." The answer was simple and to the point. She didn't move, at least not up until now.
Gosh, he felt like such a moron, not thinking of that bag earlier. It would have made things so much easier. She would have-
A sudden shift on the bed pulled the black haired teen out of his thoughts. He looked up, just to meet those mesmerizing eyes. Only then did he realize something. There was always a reason as to why Batman would refuse to take the easy way to get answers. This was no difference. The pain once again resurfacing from those pools of blue were reason enough to let it be. They should leave her belongings alone.
"Don't worry beautiful. You can trust us."
Robin could see his friend carefully putting the mentioned bag onto the girl's lap, one of his hands finding its way onto her's, grasping it in a soothing manner. "We won't do anything you don't want to happen."
Her gaze shifted, fixing onto radiating green orbs. Her lips were pressed into a thin line and her hands were tightly gripping the fabric beneath them. She wasn't speaking, but he could practically hear her voicing her hesitancy. It was all in her body language.
"It's perfectly fine if you don't want us to have a look."Wally once again assured. With one last pat on her hand, he leaned back up to stand straight. "I'm Kid Flash by the way. Nice to finally meet ya."
She responded by loosening her grip on the satchel, her head turning to look at the other boy present in the cave, then back to the one who had just introduced himself and at last down to her bag. The movements were slow, leaving enough time to watch her expression changing to a lax one. Her shoulders sagged, leaving the boys to wonder what was going through her mind. Was she thinking about what had happened before she had been brought into the Batcave? Or was she simply contemplating whether to communicate with them or not? Either way, she was more active than she had been a week ago, doing as much as moving. That was an achievement.
A genuine smile crept onto Dick's face. She was getting better and that at an exhilarating pace. Her progress was going along exceptionally well, as if something here was making her fight as hard as she could. Alfred had been right about her being a born fighter. He should have known, the man was never wrong.
Uncertain fingers brushing against his lower arm pulled him out of his musings. A shiver ran down his spine. The touch left behind a burning sensation, even though her skin was cold enough for him to feel it through his suit. He looked up at the girl. She was looking at him through half lidded eyes that were begging for sleep. Of course. He had to fight the urge to slap his hand over his forehead. All this excitement had drained her of her energy. Still, he could also see a glint of determination sparkling in them. She wanted them to stay. She wanted to interact with them more. She wanted to show them that she wasn't defeated yet. However, Bruce would have his head, if he were to exhaust the girl to the point where she was back to square one. Thus he would have to leave for the day.
Robin grabbed his friend, who had been simply observing the girl's every movement, by the elbow and gestured to the exit. Luckily, the redhead understood what he wanted and went to ruffle the girl's hair in a brotherly way. He could swear he heard her purr.
"Gotta go now. It was nice talking to you. See ya next time and take care of little birdie boy here for me, will ya? I bet he's been fretting over you since the second he caught sight of you, judging by the fact that all he's been talking 'bout with me is you, so you better not let him down. Get better ASAP, understood?" After a pause he added. "Oh, and I got you these. I hope they fit you." From out of his backpack he pulled out a few new articles of clothing. "I didn't really know your size, but I'm sure they'll fit you just fine." He placed them onto the table beside the bed. Flash PJ's, a Batman hoodie and black leggings.
"Seriously KF?" Robin sniggered at his friend's choice. "You're unbelievable."
It was a good idea to tell KF about her. He didn't regret it the least. Seeing how his sole presence had caused the girl to snap out of her stupor was more than proof of that. He would have to invite him to visit more often, now that he knew how much he affected her and well, wasn't simply having his best friend around reason enough?
"So she's the reason you haven't been with the team lately? I'm glad you're finally growing into a man." Wally laughed and slapped his friend on the back, causing the boy to drop the remote that had been on his hand a second ago with a shriek. "It's about time you finally found interest in something else than computers. I thought you were never going to hit puberty!" His lips pulled into a lopsided grin. "And I must admit, you're taste is not half as bad, though she's a little on the plain side."
Retrieving the lost item, Dick proceeded to change channels on the TV, pointedly avoiding the ginger's gaze. "I don't know what you are talking about Wals." He wasn't taking care of the girl only because she was, well, a girl! He would have done exactly the same if it had been a boy, or... would he?
"You can deny it only for so long, but that won't change the fact that you," Wally shifted him around, so that he was facing him instead if the TV and poked his chest. "Richard 'Dick' John Grayson are so totally growing up!"His good natured laughter echoed through the room.
"You're delusional KF." Robin shoved him off the bed, the freckled boy landing on the floor with a thud.
He and Wally had gone to his room after they had left the cave. He had him stay over for one night, because simply sending him home after he had just arrived would be more than rude and honestly, it had been way too long ago since he last spent some quality time with his best friend. The team was robbing him off too much of his precious time that he could, otherwisely, spend with pulling pranks or hanging out with Wals - or sneaking Al's cookies. A mischievous grin adored his facial features. He was lucky that being under Batman's wing gave him so much more freedom than the others. He couldn't imagine the League letting it slip if someone else than him took a break from being with the Young Justice. For that he was glad, but that didn't change the fact that he still had a random dimension-travelling girl in his 'basement', whose life apparently had been willingly ended by - he had to swallow hard - herself... The thought of suicide really bothered him. It was something he didn't quite grasp the concept of -didn't understand- and it drove him crazy. Why? Just why would someone give up something as special as life itself? He couldn't see himself leaving everything behind he had here no matter what happened. He was too much of an optimist to even start understanding her decision one bit. Yet, he wanted to understand. He wanted to understand so badly.
"A penny for your thoughts?"
The sudden question pulled Dick out of his musings. Wally was eying him with a worried countenance, his eyebrows furrowed. Urgh, Usually, he wasn't this obvious about his thoughts. If Wally noticed that he wasn't paying attention, it meant he was really far gone. Not good. Not good at all. Bats had already warned him to pull himself together while being on patrol, otherwise he would reclaim the responsibility over the girl. That was not what he wanted. He could take care of a mission himself! And he was going to prove Bruce that he was old enough to take on long term missions, even if it meant actually using the girl as a tool here... He shook his head. His best friend was waiting for his reply and he shouldn't let him wonder for too long. Turning off the TV, he faced the other.
"Wally." His expression was somber. He wasn't going to lie to the only person he trusted as much as he trusted his family. He could see him stiffen up at the serious tone he had used. "What do you think about suicide?"
The instance the question left his mouth, he felt two strong hands pinning him onto his bed, his back pressed against the mattress. Wally was leaning over him, his emerald green eyes piercing right through him. Pure horror was tainting the redhead's usually cheerful face.
"Don't tell me that you have been thinking about that!"
Dick could hear fear and anger dripping from his every word. On the one hand, it felt reassuring that someone cared so much about him, - to the point they would react like this for only mentioning it - but on the other hand, he was scared seeing Wally out of all people this desperate and petrified. The hands that were pressing him into the bed were trembling - trembling! Wally didn't tremble! Wally vibrated and that only out of excitement. Was it really that frightening of a thought? He-, he really would only like to know what one must be feeling, when they think that the only way out was to let everything go. It must be cruel. Would it be inhumane to ask the girl about it? He had next to no knowledge about this kind of topic. Batman never deemed it necessary to teach him about these kinds of things. Obviously that didn't stop his interest from growing since the arrival of their female charge.
"Dick!" Wally's panic filled voice jerked him back into the reality.
"Calm down KF. I'm only asking out of curiosity. You know me. I would never even consider that kind of thing. It's just..." He let his gaze fall to the side, not being able to look into those bright green eyes.
"Just what, Rob?! You can't ask this kind of question and expect me to think nothing of it! I'm-, I'm your best friend, damn it. I've known you since Uncle Barry found the Batcave years ago. You can tell me everything. You know that, right?" His voice almost broke at the end of the sentence. It was barely a whisper.
The grip on his shoulders loosened until it was completely gone. Wally slumped onto the empty space next to him, staring at the ceiling. The minutes ticked by in complete silence. That the tension in the air was as thick as butter was the understatement of the year.
"I think that it's the last thing that should be on the mind of someone-, anyone. Suicide, I mean. It's not pretty. When you reach that point where you start fantasizing about it, you know you're pretty messed up - probably too far into shit already to-." Wally shook his head."I sincerely hope that you will never have to experience it. That kind of feeling." The red-haired boy heaved a deep sigh, turning his back on his friend.
"Wals." Dick sat up, his face was pulled into a frown.
He didn't get an answer.
"Walls!" He leaned over the stiff body, trying to get a glimpse of the speedster's face. However, as soon as he so much as brushed his friend's skin, the boy flinched. When there was one thing Dick learned today, it was that he should never talk about suicide in front of anyone. It seems to be a very touchy subject. Especially for Wally.
Gently, he put a comforting hand on his shoulder, just like he had done that night with the girl. With slow and careful movements he stroked over the arm repeatedly. Eventually the boy relaxed into the soothing gesture.
"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have brought it up. I should have known better than to talk about it. Let's just grab some of Alfie's scones, yeah? I bet he finished them by now."
"Sounds good to me. You think he also made some dinner? I'm starving here." Although it wasn't as cheery as before, Wally had a grin back on his face and that was what mattered. Anything else didn't fit the animated boy. At least that was Dick's opinion.
"You're always starving KF." With a chuckle Robin leapt off the bed in a flip, perfectly landing on his feet."Let's get to the kitchen."
"Show off." Wally followed suit and passed him in a flash.
"Admit it. You know how awesome I am."
AN: I hope you liked it. It is kind of depressing and unexplained in some parts, but I promise to elaborate on important things later. And I warn you, the gloomy undertone won't completely disappear. I got a lot of my inspiration for this story on the game "The Cat Lady" (awesome game btw. You gotta watch it. Cry has it on his Youtube Channel :)) and "Life is strange" (same as mentioned before).
Anyways, my next ANs won't be this Long ;) hopefully. See you next time :D
PS: Next chapter most likely won't be this Long. I do kind of have the tendency to Long first chapters ^-^''
Bluebelle 3