So this is how I wish that the "Don't Panic pt. 2" sweat lodge scene would have gone down. I know it may be a little bit unrealistic as a reunion for Eclare, but ANYTHING is better than that gross "I love you" scene. Is anyone else as irritated by that scene as I was? Okay, like how long have she and Jake been together? They're together because of physical attraction and physical attraction alone. And Jake didn't even actually say he loved Clare, Eli said it for him. Eli and Clare never even actually said "I love you" to each other, although it was kind of always implied. Just… ugh. If anyone one would like to share their view on this, feel free to put it in a review or PM me. :)

Okay, ranting done. On with the story!

Disclaimer: I don't own Degrassi. If I did, said rants about this scene would not have needed to happen because the scene would have gone way differently.

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"He loves you, Clare," Eli murmured.

Clare looked at him, her lips parted in shock.

She regained her senses, looking to Jake for affirmation of this claim.

He just beamed at her, happily. She couldn't help but be reminded of a cute little puppy that sits in one of those display windows of a pet shop to attract customers.

Clare smiled softly back at him. "I…" She murmured, then looked back to her first love, who seemed to be waiting as expectantly as Jake for a reply. Except Eli's expression wasn't that of a happy puppy in a pet shop window.

He looked defeated, his face crestfallen.

Clare bit her lip, realizing the full ridiculousness of this situation.

The first boy she ever fell in love with, sitting across from her, telling her that her new boyfriend loved her.

"This is all too crazy," Clare finally muttered, letting out a nervous laugh.

Jake's face fell; obviously, that was not quite the response he had wanted.

Clare noticed Jake's expression change as he suddenly turned his attention to the ground.

She looked at Eli, and saw that he was doing much of the same thing as Jake. Is the ground so interesting? She thought, irritated.

"Eli?" She said softly. He looked up, offering a sad smile. "Can you leave Jake and I alone for a second?"

"Uh…" Eli quickly looked between the couple, not quite sure what was about to transpire. "Yeah, sure." He said, hesitantly standing up and wiping his hands on his skinny jeans.

"I'll just be…" Eli trailed off, pointing to the entrance of the sweat lodge.

Clare nodded, smiling. Jake didn't look up.

After Eli left, a silence fell over.

Not a comfortable one.

"Jake?" Clare finally murmured.

He looked up at the ceiling of the lodge, avoiding Clare's gaze. "You still love him, don't you?" He asked bitterly, flicking his hand toward the entrance.

Clare bit her lip. "I'm so sorry, Jake. I didn't mean—"

"Yeah, Clare. I know." He sighed deeply, looking down again.

The silence fell over them again, Clare growing more and more anxious.

"I knew, too, you know? That you still loved him." Jake muttered, mostly to himself. "What an idiot I am."

"Jake," Clare said, reaching out to him. "You are not an idiot." She said, her voice full of empathy for this boy she cared so much for.

It just wasn't enough.

"Don't," He said, his voice strained. "Don't make this any harder."

He exhaled loudly, collecting himself.

"I still want to be your friend, Clare. We've known each other too long to lose that." He finally murmured, his voice softer than it had been.

She smiled at him happily. "You do?"

He looked at her, his usual friendly smile back on his face. "Yeah."

She nodded. "Good. That's good."

"Clare, I do love you. Which is why, just like Eli said for himself before, I want you to be happy," He ran a hand through his shaggy hair, still clearly frustrated by the sudden turn of events. "And once again, like he said about me, if he makes you happy, then…" He trailed off shrugging, unable to complete his sentiment.

"Thank you, Jake," She smiled, hesitantly reaching to touch his hand. He glanced at her smiling then swiftly pulled her in for a hug.

Clare laughed. He pulled away, gazing into her eyes. She knew what he wanted, and she felt it only fair, considering, that she grant him one little thing.

He leaned in slowly, as her breathing got ragged. She would never not be attracted to Jake Martin, but she knew now that attraction wasn't everything.

His lips pressed softly to hers, and a pang of sadness hit her. She would miss this. She would miss his smell, his soft voice, his snarky sense of humor, his sweet, boyfriend-ly ways, and how uncomplicated he was. She would even kind of miss the thrill of sneaking behind their parents back.

But, he wasn't Eli.

He pulled away, leaning his forehead against hers, and smiling. "Thank you," He whispered, his sweet breath fanning her face.

She pulled away. "Jake… I do love you," She said.

"I know," He smiled sadly. "Just not the same way as him."

Clare nodded, frowning, before getting up from where she sat and walking toward the exit. She reached for the flaps, turning back to look back at Jake one more time.

At what she was letting go of.

He smiled, almost encouragingly, or as encouragingly as he could muster given the circumstances.

She smiled back before turning to the door.

To what she would be gaining.

What she had no intention of letting go of. Not again.

This is not the end! This will be a two-parter. Maybe more, depending on how satisfied I feel with the second part.