This was going to be multi-chaptered but I felt that it took away from the whole feeling.
The run on sentences are done on purpose.
This is probably best read while listening to "Dayvan Cowboy" by Boards of Canada.
and no I don't really own anything CSI:MIAMI related.
----
And that's when you saw him. He was walking down the hall and he turned to look at you and your eyes connected and time stopped. Everything froze; there was no one around you anymore, nothing moved. Your breath caught in your throat and your heart no longer beat. You stood there, looking at him, and he looking at you, eye contact never wavering. Neither of you blinked, neither of you breathed, neither of you moved a muscle. It was just you and Eric now, and after what seemed to be forever, you felt yourself put a foot in front of the other. And then Eric did the same and within a few seconds you could feel his breath on your face and the heat emanating from his body. You were so close, you could see every pore, every single speck of detail in his eyes, everything.
It was all there, he was all there. Eric was okay, and this was all real, and yes he'd been shot in the head, and yes he'd nearly died, but he was here now, he was okay. He was alive and he was smiling and he was standing half an inch away from you. And instinctively you moved closer and so did he and it was slow and tantalizing and it seemed to take forever. And then your lips finally met and all caution was thrown to the wind and time sped up and you were no longer taking slow steps but you were both kissing each other like you'd been long lost lovers, separated for years.
In an instant you realized that this was everything. This was euphoria. This was heaven. This was purgatory and hell and the universe and strawberry fields and perfect white beaches and the Amazon Rainforest and Angel Falls and the top of Mount Everest and the bottom of the ocean and the stars and the moon and every planet, every being and every single fucking thing you could ever want to see. And you could feel the warm wetness of tears spilling down your face and the feeling of Eric's own mixing with yours. Your hands found their way to his face, and you were tilting your head, trying to get even closer to Eric. You opened your mouth and suddenly it was as if you were both trying to become one another. It was no longer Eric and Ryan, you were both one person. You couldn't tell where your fingers ended and his began. You couldn't tell if that was his hair or yours or if his hands were on you or yours on him. You couldn't tell anymore because you'd crossed any line, boundary, anything that could possibly mark whatever this was and whatever came before it.
You started to sob, and Eric pulled back, and you buried your face into his chest and he wrapped his arms around you and held you close. Eric was safety. Eric was warmth. Eric was everything and right now you felt so lucky that you had to cry, because nothing else could possibly atone for what this was.
And then time started again, and you realized that you weren't alone, and that maybe a dozen or so people had just seen you, but right now you couldn't care any less, and you don't think Eric could've either because he was crying into your hair, and you were crying into his chest and this was all just so emotional that you wanted to escape.
'lets go' you said to him. And he loosened his grip around you enough to be able to look at your face and said
"okay" and so you walked out of that door, you never once broke contact, even if it was one hand laying in another, it was always there.
You don't remember getting into your car, and you definitely don't remember any of the drive. You don't remember any of the people walking down the street, or how many steps it took to get upstairs, or who even opened your door. Your OCD had been long forgotten as you both threw your clothes to the floor and your kicked off your shoes and the second you were inside your house with him your lips had connected with a desperation so fierce that it fused you together.
You don't remember what shirt you were wearing an hour ago, and you definitely don't remember where you'd discarded of it, but right now you have Eric with his arm over your chest and your both sweaty and gross and the room reeks of sex and the sun is starting to set and you know that this is perfect. You guess that people will never know the definition of perfect until they've lived this. They will never know what life is until they've had this, whatever it is.
Eric stirs a bit and you look over at him and he catches your eyes and smiles warmly, and you know its contagious because you're smiling back and he's opening his mouth to say something and when you hear those three words time stops again and for just a few minutes, everything in the world is right again. There is no hate; there is no poverty, no killing, and no violence. There is no bloodshed, there are no natural disasters, there is just you and Eric and everything in the world is good.
The last few rays of sun are peeking through the glass window of your small apartment and you wonder if everyone in the world felt like this, would there really be anything bad?
'What are you thinking about?' Eric asks, his eyes are still shut and his face is still buried in the crook of your neck. You look down at him and you smile and you put a hand on his cheek and kiss his temple and you don't really answer that question but you know he knows what you're thinking.
'Come sleep' he says, and you still have your head on his temple and you smile against it and he can feel it and you can feel him smile against your neck, and you say okay but you can't really tell if you said it or whispered it.
And you lay down and he moves a bit so that his chin is resting on the top of your head and his arm is around your midsection and you have one around his and your face is in his chest and you have at least eight covers over the both of you and you feel warm and safe and perfect.
And you fall asleep and you hope you never have to wake up again because this is all you're every going to need.