Disclaimer: All characters violently abused in this piece of fiction belong to Kousuke Fujishima, author of Oh My Goddess and/or his publishers Kodansha(Japan) and Dark Horse Comics.

Translator's notes: This story has been translated from its original language (Russian) by me, Asterdw, so if something sounds awkward or downright wrong - it's all my fault.

Warning: This fanfic may contain mild violence, (not really so) bad language and, possibly, some adult themes in the future (shoujo ai). There will be a separate warning and a rating change in case the aforementioned themes will be included.

Enjoy!

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Ah! My Island!

Chapter 1

"How dare you! … Too weak… Should have… Nooo!" The fusion of voices, loud rumble and flashes of light. I closed my eyes tight and tried to cover my ears... And woke up. I immediately wished I hadn't, though, because at that very moment I was swept away by an avalanche of pain. Just about every cell of my body hurt, as if I had endured a full program in a washing machine, and spent some quality time in the tumble dryer on top of that. So I made an effort to remain still and keep my eyes shut, and just fully concentrated on that pain. It was odd, because I wasn't supposed to feel it at all. Those of my kind regenerate in our sleep, and do it relatively quickly. I couldn't recall the system failing us like this, not unless it was severely damaged. But this was equally unlikely, as after the last incident the intrusion security was enhanced significantly, and I knew this from having contributed a lot to those modifications myself. So the problem was in me, and so now I only had to rely on myself for healing. First, I completely blocked signals from the pain receptors. This had an inconvenient side effect of preventing me from feeling anything at all, but it still was a good start. The recovery itself was relatively straightforward: some control over my body to accelerate natural regeneration, some magic to patch up everything else, some patience for the processes to go as they should have and lots and lots of willpower to control all of the above. About a half an hour in that state and I was guaranteed to spend the next 24 hours in near-comatose hibernation, as all my powers had been drained dry. And the last thing I felt before collapsing into that blissful dreamless sleep was a rather strong shove and someone's resentful grumbling.

My next awakening was somewhat better than the previous one, ignoring the fact that sleeping on solid ground did wonders in giving me a backache and I was dying to take a bath. I opened my eyes and nearly let out a scream after realizing where exactly I was. I found myself stretched outon a sandy beach with a lush tropical forest behind me and no one, literally, not a living soul, anywhere in sight. A detailed self-examination didn't serve to lift my spirits – I was clearly having a bad hair day, my dress was torn to shreds and my arms and legs were covered in fresh scars and scratches. I tried sending a probe request to Yggdrasil, but was left without any response. An attempt to restore my clothes also ended in a failure, but I did manage to untangle my hair. This could only mean that I had retained the powers directly related to my body and nothing else. Just perfect. Having failed to find anything better to do, I decided to go swimming. I quickly discarded the rags that were once had been proudly referred to as my battle suit and strolled down to the sea. Salty waves embraced me gently, washing away sand and dirt. I had once heard somewhere that cleanliness is next to godliness and whatever it meant, there seemed to be a grain of truth in it, since I could literally feel my body's recovery accelerating and all that was left to do was to float on my back and observe the scars disappearing in front of my eyes. It wasn't long before I spotted a huge coastal rock, cutting deep into the sea. I dived and swam towards the said rock, amused by the schools of vividly colored tropical fishes hurrying away from me, and rejoicing at my remaining ability to breathe underwater. And when I emerged from the water I had a surprise waiting for me. There was a silhouette of a person sitting on the rock with its feet submerged in water but, blinded by the bright rays of the sun, I couldn't make out the face.

"Are you done showing off, Little Mermaid?"

And then I realized that my troubles were only just beginning.

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"So do you know where we are and what happened?" I had climbed out of the water and was now sitting next to Mara, drying my hair. Last ten minutes were wasted on her passionate declamations, which I wasn't paying attention to. At all.
"You betcha! Of course I do!" My former friend was barefoot, but still completely enveloped in her cape despite the heat.
"Well..?" I was beginning to lose patience.
"And why the hell should I tell you?" She grinned.

The desire to blast her with my most powerful lightning strike was overwhelming, but the sky didn't split itself to my calling and instead of the shining bolt Mara was hit by a small electric discharge which couldn't even tickle someone.

"Is this all you can do, oh mighty queen of thunder?" She roared with laughter.

I grabbed her by the collar, but lost my balance and we both tumbled into the water. Now was my turn to chuckle, since it soon became obvious that during her relatively long life Mara had never bothered to learn how to swim and she was now floundering about in the water, trying to stay on the surface and spewing out impressively elaborate curses.

"Urd, get me out of here! Help me get to the bloody shore!" She got entangled in her own cape and was now clearly panicking.
"And what will I get in return?" I knew I could catch her at any moment, but I wouldn't be myself if I lost such a great chance to use the situation to my advantage.
"You… you demon!" Mara blurted out, but immediately changed her mind. "All right, I'll tell you where we are, just help me!"

I immediately grabbed her and only a minute later we were both lying on the beach. However, it was long before Mara stopped spitting out water and cursing all those who had created it with such a revolting taste.

"Well...?" I stared into her eyes impatiently.
"You really don't remember anything? Nothing at all?" Her voice actually sounded curious rather than mocking.
"Last thing I recall was falling asleep in my own bed on the 1st of July." I decided to be frank.
"She did a great job at blasting you then…" My former friend murmured almost inaudibly.
"Maaaara…"

"Yeah, yeah, I'm trying to start telling you." She inhaled deeply. "I don't actually know how all this mess began, since I wasn't there, but you had a huge row with Hild-sama, you attacked her with your lightning bolts, and then she completely lost it: shut you off from Yggdrasil and chucked you out to this island. We should be somewhere around New Zealand, if I'm not mistaken."
"Wait, and how did you get here then?"
"Hild-sama's orders, of course. She couldn't leave her precious daughter alone here, now could she?" Mara said, smirking. "So I was sent to keep an eye on you. You know, in case local savages get the wrong idea from you flaunting your naked body like that…"

I glanced over my body with unconcealed pride and realized that the loss of the dress was really nothing to mourn. But she was right; I couldn't walk around the island like this all the time.

"If you don't like what you see, make me some clothes – you know I can't do it myself now."

Mara closed her eyes and stretched out her hand, summoning her powers, but nothing happened. I also noticed that the sleeve of her shirt was torn and revealed a large scar. Now it was clear why she was muffled in her cape like that.

"Mara, how did you get here?" I sincerely hoped that my voice did not betray my anxiety.
"Right…" She sighed and looked away." I also took a thrashing, but don't ask me why. "

I lifted the cape and got treated to a grim view: through the tears in the fabric of her shirt I could see numerous scratches and wounds on her arms and shoulders, some barely visible but some still bleeding. Mara was so much better at harming than healing.

"Need help?" I tried to touch the most dangerous-looking wound, but Mara jerked away.
"Keep your divine interventions to yourself, thank you very much." She snapped.

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TBC. As soon as the translatorstops being lazy.