A/N Hellooo! So this is just a little something I conjured up and finally found the nerve to publish. Be gentle it's my first time!

*Disclaimer-As you know Twilight-ness isn't mine. If it was I would be couped up with Edward in on Isle Esme*

I sighed to myself. I lay soft to where her remained hard. I'm smooth where he is calloused. His worker's hand's skim over my hips, making me tremble. The hands circle around my thighs, exploring my calves and dancing around my toes. Resting in between my legs, nothing but scraps of fabric between us. His fingers dance over my lips tracing its outlines. I breathe deep and I know he's teasing. I bite his thumb lightly and he slaps my thigh. He likes to play but doesn't like to be played.

"Please, Can I touch?" I mumble out. I reach up my hands and he stops me, trapping my hands above my head with one hand, teasing my stomach with the other.

"No, you know why. Ta…" I interrupt him.

"She doesn't matter. If she loved you she wouldn't hurt you. If you loved her you wouldn't be resting in between my thighs, if you loved her you wouldn't need me" I said as strong as I could. "Please" I wasn't above begging.

"No" but he presses his body flush against mine.

We are so close our hearts are one. Our blood is in sync. My legs fall open wider and he moans at the closer contact the wetness. I am his waterfall in the desert. He rolls on to his back, bringing me with him. He sits up as my legs wrapped around him. We are locked together like a Chinese finger trap. I couldn't let him go. Staring into his eyes like this, his resolve is breaking.

"Tell me" he says so quietly, "Tell me what makes you better then her. How do I know you won't hurt me?" he trails off.

"I'm here" I whisper in his ear before biting it lightly.

"It isn't enough"

"But it should be Edward!" I push away from him.

Practically jumping off the bed, I start to pace the room. I'm heated from his gaze, I'm heated from his words but I'm cold from the abrupt loss of contact. I needed to think. I needed to tell him. I needed him to know. All we did was show, we never told. I grabbed his t-shirt off the bed and slipped it on. He slid to the edge of the bed and watched me as I slowly paced.

"It just isn't that simple Isabella" he sighed.

I looked out the window at the city lights of Seattle from the top floor of the Marriot. It was beautiful. But if we loved in the open this view would be a weekend trip not a secret rendezvous.

"It should be simple" he came up behind me and snaked his arms around my waist. "Just because she made it difficult…" our eyes locked in the reflection "I love you" I say firmly.

He lets me go as I turn to embrace him. He's the one pacing now.

"She makes me better" he gives a sad smile.

I scoff. "Your perfect the way you are" I state.

He stops the incessant pacing. He turns to face me and stands in the middle of the room. I step towards him and meet him in the middle.

"I don't want to lead you on"

"I want to follow"

"I can't do this anymore Isabella" he sighs.

But he looks into my eyes. His words doesn't match his eyes. It is all in the eyes. And all I see there is undying, unyielding love. I didn't need to be a mind reader, or clairvoyant or some sort of emotion feeler to figure out what is all in the depths of his emerald ocean. He loves me.

"Yes. Just say it" I say softly touching his cheek as he leans into my touch.

"Promise me" he says as he intertwines our fingers.

"I don't promise, I just love.

Suddenly it was kisses so sweet and a love so deep and wonderful and perfect. But I was not lost on me as t-shirts were removed and scraps of lace and silk were gone. When it was just skin to skin I knew that he still had not said the words I have been waiting three months to hear. The words that lay on the front of his brain and the tip of his tongue. Why won't he speak them out loud?

He's still thinking of her while he is with me. He probably thinks of me while he is deep in her. Is that all that I am? Is that all that I can be? I try to enjoy his mouth on my flushed skin, but I can't do it. The pressure is building but not for the right type of release. I don't want to just be something just loving and easy. I don't want to be just a place holder for when she decides that he is truly perfect.

He pauses at my entrance, a look uncertainty passes across his face.

"Your thinking about her?" I say trying to fight back tears.

"She's good for me" he says.

"She's pretty for you" you mean.

"Your beautiful"

"She has so much to offer" he says with a smirk playing on his face. I wish I was in on the joke.

"I can just give you me" I say trying to push him off me.

"Silly Isabella, don't you know that's all I need" he pushes in me.

And just like that he is mine.

If you read, love you. If you review, love you. Hope it was bearable...