Announcement: I also have a Tumblr for writing fanfiction now. If you want updates, questions, chat with me, request promps or oneshots, and get updates on new projects first, please check it out! It's Pessimistic Punctuation Or Pessimisticpunctuation . tumblr . com (remove spaces)
Author's Notes: Hello all! Welcome to my new story, I hope you all find it well. It is 100% an original story-line that will not follow the games at all. sorry this is AU! This is not my main story but I have a few chapters already prepared so I can update this at least monthly. I hope you enjoy this and I hope you like my version of Hawke! There will be characters in this story as well from the games, and I will also be giving you all trigger warnings. This is a dark and mature story that will have sensitive scenes and triggering moments. I will do my best not to glorify or overfill the story with trauma, but this is just as much about Fenris' story as Hawke's and I want to write this realistically, at least his battling with his abuse and life as a slave etc.
~Start Chapter 1~ Trigger Warnings: Child abuse, abuse, minor gore, mention of injuries and whipping, substance abuse mentions, blood mention
A mess, that's what she was. From the moment of her birth she was told she was cursed. Cursed to outlive her family, cursed to abusive relationships, cursed to the confines of her ancestry. Hiding behind a haze to avoid the world.
She was addicted to mess, to danger, to pain. Or so she had begun telling herself. It was easier that way to explain away the grief and traumatic moments as merely her fate.
A long ago steeled heart pushed her forward through a series of bad choices and life long regrets. There wasn't a moment she didn't remember hearing of her cursed upbringing. She was alone in the end, it was easier.
She was told she could have been beautiful, if only she acted like a lady. If only she didn't bear the curse of magic.
Scoffing at such thoughts, bony fingers pulled at the cigarette betwixt her fingers. It did her no good to dwell on her past, she moved here to escape it for a reason. Leave it behind to burn into dust.
At least she wasn't some sort of meth head or other form of addled drug addict. Despite her poor choices, she had never gone down that road. The one thing she'd never break down and do.
That, and blood magic.
Scuffed black boots clicked, the cigarette butt falling to the cement, it's embers sparking around the butt like fire works.
One of the boots pressed down on it sufficiently putting it out. As much of a mess as she was, she was never interested in accidentally starting a fire, winter or not.
"Aria what are you doing? Get the fuck inside before the bouncer decides it's full." a tall blond stick of a thing proclaimed in pure annoyance. Her tanned skin glowed under the streetlamps, beads of sweat reflecting the light.
"Fuck me I can't even finish a cigarette in peace anymore." Aria sighed, hands pushing the box into the back on her worn and torn jeans.
"Then fucking quit, don't be such a bitch because you still carry such a juvenile and disgusting habit." her blood red lips sneered as she pulled Aria's arm.
"You smoke pot all day, you can't quit cigarettes and fucking act all high and mighty, I saw you snort that adderall off that guy's chest last weekend for fuck's sake."
"Oh don't even start, sometimes you need a fucking pick me up," equally red nails bit into Aria's arm in annoyance, "Fucking move."
With a soft shove Aria was enshrouded with the heavy stench of booze, body spray, and sweat. The darkness illuminated with flashing lights, music thundering to the point she couldn't hear her friends complaints anymore.
~Break~
The night went on, in a pleasantly drunk high, Aria danced grinding up against whoever was closest. Fingers gripped at her flesh, sweat dripped all over her skin. As she looked out into the darkness she saw the shape of a lithe but lean man. What caught her gaze was the bright white hair illuminating under the blacklights. The marks on his faces reminding her of the rave scene, glowing blue.
Everything was a blur as she squinted, the man rubbing against her forgotten. She felt too hot as his gaze fell on her.
His eyes were so cold, she couldn't tell the shape, but the gaze, she could feel it searing her skin. What caught her was the ethereal glow of his ocean green eyes.
Everything felt slowed as he turned to face her and all she could do was slowly push through the mass of people to trace the marks on his skin.
As she neared to see the strange dark contours of what he was wearing, a hand gripped her shoulder. A pain seared her skin, goosebumps prickling.
Her friends mouth moved silently. Blinking hard she tried to make sense of what was being said before she couldn't remember anymore.
~Break~
Slowly her eyes fluttered against her pale cheeks, her body shifting slightly under the blankets. She felt a sweltering heat come from her shoulder, but she couldn't be bothered to deal with it over her pounding head. Whether it was from her vision or hangover she'd never know.
She tilted her blue eyes and scanned her upturned room with a scowl. Shit, she must have been beyond wasted last night.
She eased herself into a sitting position and winced again at the pounding pain that ebbed in and out, like a waning moon. With a flick of her wrist she pulled a bottle and glass of water off her kitchen counter with ease. They landed smoothly in her hands as she pulled a sweaty hand through her oily hair, scratching her scalp lightly as she went.
She took a swig of water, relishing it's cool effect on her dry throat. Next she tilted her head back, popping two pain killers and lifted herself to a stand. She pushed through her dirty clothing, and tripped over a pair of heels as she reached her bathroom door. Entering she took note of the mess her long black hair was. Her sapphire blue eyes glowed eerily back at her, her pale and sickly skin making her look sunken in. Her eyes had dark circles, and where her skin wasn't a pale white, it was red and blotchy.
She mussed with her fringe a bit, before deciding a shower was worth the risk of making her headache worse.
As she washed last night's filth away, she also washed away the remnants of her vision. It had all felt so real in the moment.
She always hated having the sight.
~Break~
Aria puffed out a short breath and sighed deeply as she realized she was out of dish soap and would need to leave the warmth of her apartment and brave the sleet and snow that had been coming down all day.
She wasn't really invested in it, in fact it was probably one of the more irritating things on her agenda. As she was debating whether she could use her shampoo to wash her dirtied cups, her cell phone rang from her bedside and she bolted, tripping again over the same blanket, and lunged onto her bed, pulling the thin phone into her hands.
"Hello?" She greeted, trying to move her fringe out of her eyes where it had fallen.
"Ms. Hawke?" The voice spoke over the phone as Aria internally swore inside her head.
"Speaking." She sighed as she pushed the phone into the crick of her neck and sat up fully.
"We had an incident at the Arcanum." the distressed voice spoke up causing Aria to curse out loud this time.
"Are you kidding me?" She whispered to herself as she pressed the pads of her fingers to the bridge of her nose.
"I'm not m'am, the Archmage has requested your assistance." the voice, she had finally recognized, belonged to one of the local APD, or Arcanum Police Department. She had met him once before, his name was Miles if she remember correctly, Officer Miles.
"I'll be there in twenty, is there anything I should know?" She sounded irritated now, shit that wasn't going to win her any points within the APD. She was already hated enough by them.
"An acolyte there attempted to enter the fade on his own, it's a mess m'am." he sounded like a good 'ol boy, doing god's work. She could almost hear his zealous rant on his reasons for joining the APD.
Aria didn't much care for them. It was an attempt to remove the oppression of mages hundreds of years ago. For the most part it worked, but internal bigotry still existed in excess.
The Arcanum was now a school for mages. It also usually housed important governing mages for each province. This particular one was also the home of the Archmage and his council. Each province had their own Arcanum, which oversaw all mage laws as well as worked with the local APD to ensure that non-mages and mages alike could co-exist happily.
There had once been a bloody war within one of the first provinces that allowed mages freedom from what had once been known as the circle. Only, they abused non-mages instead. Taking slaves and committing horrible acts. It was a dark time in their history.
It had taken a long time and had become nothing more than faded history. But Aria knew it well, she had read a lot about the Province once known as Tervinter. It was the same home she lived in now, having moved from a province farther south.
This province was now known as Arcadia. It was where the head Arcanum was located, a place only the best and brightest mages were sent. She had been sent to work there after her own graduation four years ago.
While all the provinces had their own governments and cities, the mages were all a part of the same collective Arcanum, which helped keep people from abusing their powers or abilities as easily ever again. Hold those with power to a higher and different standard and all that.
What a load of bull.
Aria Hawke was what you would consider the equivalent of an APD officer, but for the Archmage. She had been given the position three years ago after she had handled an acolyte that had made a deal with a demon and had taken over the fourth floor of the Arcanum. The Archmage was so impressed she was promoted from security to an actual officer, which was saying something considering her age.
Her official title was Magus, she was a member of the official police force of the Archmage. She was basically a glorified clean-up crew. Which meant her job was LITERALLY to piss off the APD. She hated having to save face for the bumbling buffoons that would sooner shoot her than anything else.
Locking her apartment door, she adjusted the staff on her hip, taking care to keep her gun holster free just in case.
She quickly ducked into her underground entering her small black sedan and started it up, her breath fogging against the windshield as she turned the key.
'I fucking hate winter...' she groaned to herself as her engine started up and she pushed the stick into gear and slowly drove out of her parkade.
~Break~
It was more than just an incident. It seemed that the Acolyte had not only tried to make a deal with a demon, but had wanted to use blood magic to bind the demon under his control. What a stupid idiot. Blood magic was dangerous and wherever this kid had gotten the spell, it was from somewhere even more deadly.
The room was coated in the blood of at least four other acolytes the mage had sacrificed to start the ritual. However, it seemed the spell was half finished as the room was coated in lyrium, magic, and blood. Shit, what the hell had he summoned?
She noted the ravaged corpse of what she assumed was the student, before she turned to track down the dangerous entity that had been summoned.
"Put in a complete lockdown, call the APD's Templar Unit now." She ordered the APD officer who had trailed in after her, holding a hand to their mouth in an attempt to keep their lunch down.
"Yes ma'am."
Aria took a moment to center herself and her magic, and slowly found the tether of fel magic. a
She followed it through the eerie quiet halls. There wasn't anymore blood, to which she was thankful, but something didn't sit right.
Why wasn't the demon trying to kill her or anyone else?
She felt the pull of the demon and the fade as she found the doors to the altar room open. She slowly walked in, her staff snapping open and elongating from the bottom. The first thing she noticed was the darkness encapsulating the room, and the candles lining each pew, as well as the entirety of the altar.
As she approached it she felt the doors to the room slam shut and she quickly summoned a fireball into her hand as she stood at the ready. A soft cackle lept through the room and caused a shiver to coarse up Aria's spine.
"Oh little mage, you have no idea do you...once a blood ritual is started, it must be finished. However, I refuse to be the one bound..." It hissed as she could hear the wet bloodied lips of the monster twist as it spoke.
"You can try." Aria spoke resolutely. She had faced more than her fair share of demons at this point. This one didn't scare her.
"Poor little Mage, no idea where I have come from. Did you know the fade is not ruled by time, nor the rules of your reality?" It spoke, a cackle trailing it's words. Another wet sound snapped Aria back to her searching of the creature.
Whatever it was she wasn't so sure it was a demon anymore.
"Show yourself." She spoke as she sent out a rush of magic, the room illuminating bright suddenly as the candles raged with fire.
"Such a powerful little mageling...so tasty..." she heard its voice right against the shell of her left ear and she pivoted, her staff coming out with a blast of light.
The creature shrieked as it pulled back, slinking towards the altar, a glare in its beady black eyes. Aria smirked and walked towards the altar, intent to finish this so she could go back home and relax on her only day off.
"Silly mageling, you all think yourself so powerful, so above everyone else...you always fail to notice through your egotistical ideals that you've been sufficiently trapped!" it chirped.
Aria realized much too late she had stepped through the circle of a powerful ritual. She noticed the thin line of blood brighten up and glow a horrible deep maroon as a barrier erected effectively trapping her with the creature.
She suppressed a growl as she twisted her head around to view the creature fully. It had small black eyes with no whites. The body was long, almost feminine looking, but when you looked closely the back was too long, the spine too spiked, and the chest was flat. The creatures skin was a deep ebony, fading in spots to a smokey grey.
It's lips dripped dark maroon blood as it's overly wide smile opened, showing an array of deepset pointed teeth. It reminded her way too much of a shark, it's nose almost slopped in a similar manner with small slits.
"I can look more like you, if that would set you at ease." It laughed, a dark purple tongue slipping out to taste the dripping blood on it's chin.
"I am perfectly fine with you as you are demon." She spoke, conjuring another bout of light in hopes to send this shadow creature back to where it came from.
"The ritual must be completed girl, and I refuse for it to be me." It advanced faster than anything she had ever fought before, and so she tripped on the altar causing herself, and all the candles, to tumble to the ground igniting the velvet curtains hanging around the altar.
Aria let out a scream as a red hot pain spiked up her arm where the fire had started to lick at her sweater. She quickly cast a water spell and struggled to her feet, using her staff as leverage. Her arm was now wet and stinking of singed flesh causing her stomach to curdle.
The monster was cackling now, it's nose pressing against hers as it's eyes stared deeply into her deep blue ones. It started chanting, its long claw-like fingers digging into her flesh. She could feel her skin starting to tear as she tried to pull away, her head locked where it was against the monsters.
"You will take my place, once the ritual is started it can never be undone. However, that little mageling is dead, so into the fade we shall go, the next ritual attempted, you shall take my place." It laughed as she realized throughout its chanting they had entered the fade.
'Shit' Aria thought as she broke away from the monster, feeling her arms burn in protest as rivers of blood started to bleed into her grey sweater. She had to do something fast.
As the last bit of the room faded from view, she quickly cast out her magic hoping to open a portal before the last of her home disappeared from her grasping fingertips.
'Please...' she thought hopelessly as her mind became fuzzy in the fade, and the monsters horrible grin tilting in ecstasy.
~Break~
Aria awoke to the feeling of a beating sun, and a bustling city. Sitting up with a groan she noticed her skin was flushed and overheated. Pulling her grey sweater off, leaving her in her dark grey tank top, she relished the cool breeze that licked at her sweaty skin.
Looking around she noticed people wandering around, some with large pointed ears, other's with long intricate robes, covered in golds, silvers, and precious gems.
"What in the..." she whispered to herself as she grabbed her staff, strapping it to her side once again.
The people walking through the cobbled roads gave her strange looks, and sometimes think glares, as she passed them. She was in awe at where she was and couldn't quite put her finger on it, but it was all drastically familiar.
"Ahh Serah!" A voice spoke starling Aria from her inspection of her surroundings.
"Ser...ah?" She whispered to herself, no one called anyone THAT anymore.
"How can I help a fine mage such as yourself?" He spoke, eying the staff she was holding.
"No help necessary, I am fine..." She waved off as she turned to walk away, "Wait!" She shouted suddenly, "Can you tell me where I am?" She asked hoping she could find the local airport and get home.
"Why yes Serah! You are in the grand Tervinter Imperium!" her blood ran cold at that and she almost thought he was joking.
"Oh...the...date?" She inquired, not wanting to admit her possible displacement in time.
"It is currently the ninth age of Thedas!" the merchant exclaimed once more.
Yeah that caused her blood to run cold as ice. Fuck. She wasn't even CLOSE to being born. Shit.
"I must admit, I am a touch lost...do you know if there are any embassies?" She inquired quietly, hoping to not sound to out of place.
"There is the senate...they may be able to help a mage such as yourself! Assuming you have coin..." he trailed off, rubbing his throat with his large tanned hand.
"Would you mind helping me find it?"
"Why yes Serah!" The merchant was much to pleased to oblige.
Shit, he was probably going to expect coin and Aria had none to speak of.
~Break~
She was shown to a large decorated white marble building, covered in gorgeous tapestry. Steeling herself she took a breath and turned to the merchant promising repayment once she had settled her affairs here.
Hoping she could anyways.
The man smiled happily and let her know where to find him and went on his way. From how she was being treated for being a mage, she assumed this was when the circle had taken over and had created their own Senate.
"Can I help you?" An accented voice spoke as she entered the grandiose hall. The girl had chin length dark black hair, and a narrow face. Her sharp eyes held cold ice blue eyes that ghosted over Aria's body in disdain.
"I am looking for the Tervinter Imperium Senate, I am a mage finding myself lost and in need of assistance." She bowed, hoping to appear unassuming. The woman before her regarded her coldly as she moved towards her, her thin orchid coloured silks brushing the marble floor.
Her mouth curved into a grin as she came to stand before Aria, taking note of her shambled appearance and strange clothing. She clucked her tongue in amusement and her gaze finishing raking over her form to rest on her face.
"As uncouth as you appear, you are most definitely a mage." Her lips pursed in a thin line as she opened her mouth to say something more, but was halted by the large double doors at the end of the entry hall swinging open.
"Hadriana, what is taking you so long?" A deep pitch startled both mages to turn and regard a much older Mage with greying ear length hair. To his left was a white haired elf wearing dark spiked black armor.
Aria's intake of breath seemed to catch his ears because he turned to her with a glare, before coolly standing at the ready beside the elder mage.
She recognized him from her vision at the club. Those markings were unmistakable.
"Danarius!" Hadriana gasped as she bowed long and low before flitting to his side, "This mage is in need of assistance from the Senate." She laughed, her voice ringing cruelty.
Aria didn't miss the slight flinch of the white haired man's eyes at all.
"Is she now?" He placed a hand on his bearded chin and his grin swept wide and clean as he shifted his gaze between herself and the white haired man behind him. It seemed she was a butt of some sort of joke.
"Interested?" He boasted, stepping away from the man in question as he noticed her curious gaze.
"No." Aria crisply spoke, wanting to leave the heavy blanket of danger that had settled over the room.
"He is a work of art, truly. An elf is largely useless, no better than a slave. But I've discovered a way to make him useful for mages." His perfectly kept pearly whites glistened in the golden light of the room and Aria felt the hairs on the back of her neck stand on end.
"How lovely for him." She dryly remarked, her anger starting to bubble at the mention of slaves. Elves didn't exist in her time, she was more than startled to find them in fact. Wherever they had gone in her time, she could hardly blame them seeing the treatment of them as less than human.
"Yes, well, shall we?" He swept his arm out as he looked at the man expectantly. He bowed and moved to shadow Danarius as he escorted Aria into the main atrium.
Aria avoided his arm as he offered it, instead walking in front of him, wanting to avoid being near the unsettling elf.
As she entered she noticed a few of the Magister's still hanging around the room, a meeting long done.
"What is your name?" Danarius inquired as he swept in beside her, his own silk robes stirring a small amount of noise in the quiet room.
"Aria Hawke." She spoke smoothy, regarding the other Magisters as they stared down at her from their angled seats along the far wall.
"Does she have any holdings in Tervinter?" The youngest man there inquired.
Aria faltered, shit. She didn't have anything in this time. Swallowing thickly she attempted to form some sort of words to gloss over the lack of coin and titles.
"I-well...I am not from the Tervinter Imperium, but I have heard mages are free of the circle here." She lied without missing a beat.
"Curious..." The sandy blond haired man whispered as he came around his seat to inspect her, "It is clear you are not from low stock looking at the care your body has had, however no title and no coin means we cannot help you." and like that she was doused in cold water.
"Of course..." She whispered as she moved to leave, her face burning in rage and embarrassment. She missed the flicker of eyes the white haired elf threw her as she stalked out. Hadriana's laughter playing backdrop to her defeat.
It was clear no one expected her to gain any help, she was no more than a mere amusement to the Magisters here.
As she entered the main hall again, she noticed the shriek of a young girl as the crack of a whip snapped through the air.
Rushing forward Aria found a young elf girl, no older than 14, with her clothing torn off of her upper body, her back covered in deep bloody whip marks.
"What the fuck?!" Aria screamed as she rushed forward, stalling the whip with her magic, a glare set on her face.
"And who are you." The angry looking middle-aged man growled, his dark hair covering one deep brown eye, the other stared deeply into her own before he pulled the whip from her magic and stepped away from the elf.
"I am Aria Hawke, the one stopping you from this blatant display of abuse." She all but growled, her eyes matching his own.
"Who are you to tell me what I can and cannot do with my property." He summoned a fireball and Aria stood her ground, stifling the flinch that wanted to break free.
"Aria Hawke, like I said. I refuse to stand here and accept your treatment of this child." She stepped in front of the young elf and glared defiantly at the magister before her.
"Well well well..." Danarius clapped as he walked forward, stepping between the two seething mages.
"Andrian is correct, you have insulted and challenged a magister, if you wish to take claim to this slave, you must win in a magical duel-"
"Then I challenge." Aria ground out, not missing a beat. She knew she was in over her head. It would do her better to blend in and lay low.
But she was a child. Aria couldn't stand to bear the thought of leaving her.
~Break~
And that was how she found herself in her particular brand of a mess. She wasn't quite sure what possessed her to challenge him, much less enter into a fight to the proverbial death. But she had done it and there was no going back.
So here she was, startled from the literally two second fight, staring down at the impaled form of what used to be one of the more important Magisters of Tervinter.
Shit.
That wasn't supposed to happen, but the mage before her was cocky and didn't think she was anything more than another plaything.
That had been his downfall, but it wasn't meant to be his death.
"Well well well." Danarius clapped again as he came to stand beside her, laughter dancing in his eyes.
"I didn't mean..." Aria slowly spoke, her words feeling heavy on her tongue. She had never taken a life before. She assumed he'd have blocked, taken her even a little seriously. She took him at his title assuming him to be strong, how wrong she was.
"Of course you did, now you gain his title and house, smart little mage aren't you" He laughed as he walked past her, his white haired elf and what she assumed was his apprentice trailing after him. It was as if she had planned this to everyone else.
She locked gazes with the white haired elf from her dreams and she all but lost her breath. He turned away, the look on his face giving nothing as he disappeared out the double doors.
~End of Chapter 1~Author's Notes: Here is chapter one! I hope you guys liked it! R&R This is def going to be a porny story. Lots of fluff and angst as well.
Announcement: I also have a Tumblr for writing fanfiction now. If you want updates, questions, chat with me, request promps or oneshots, and get updates on new projects first, please check it out! It's Pessimistic Punctuation Or Pessimisticpunctuation . tumblr . com (remove spaces)