A police car snailed its way across the cracked open dark road. Its silent red and blue lights splashed its color over the old tattered apartment buildings that grew all over the place like weeds and the dark abyssal alleyways that God knows what's lurks at the end. And despite the full moon clearly hanging over the beautiful starry night sky, it looked as if none of their light could reach Zootopia's darkest corner. It was the near broken street lights that shined anything at all.
Nick Wilde, a red fox that donned a formal police uniform, cracked open a sizzling bottle of soda, leaned back into his comfy black chair, and laid his tired legs up front. He took a small sip then sighed in relief as he savored the refreshness that washed over him.
"Nick, seriously. How many times have I told you to NOT put your dirty feet in front?" a stern voice scolded.
That angry voice always kicked a smile at the fox's face. "Well, if you count the first crime being today… then one."
Judy Hopps, another fellow officer, wished nothing more than to murder the damn fox with her vicious violet glare. However, the rules of the road kept her glare focused on the road in front of her. "Nick, I'm telling you: stop fooling around. We gotta stay vigilant around these parts."
"Me? Fooling around?" he answered with mock hurt. "I am a proud officer of the ZPD! I take the responsibility of protecting Zootopia's citizens VERY seriously, Officer Carrots."
"Then try explaining to me why you're wearing sunglasses in the middle of the night?"
He lifted his sunglasses at her so his emerald eye could give her a crafty smirk. "Because it makes me look cool. And I know you love it, Cottontail."
Cottontail couldn't hide her pretty obvious blush from the playful fox. However, in no time flat, he found himself blushing too when he realized he drank in too much of her beauty.
God did he love her. The old Nick would've found her tall ears annoying, her gray fur just a tad bit too gray for him to look at it, and her stubborn never-give-up gaze also annoyingly annoying. Now though, her tall ears were just too cute for him NOT to give an occasional nibble, her gray fur still not a likable color for him but its softness factor pretty much made him addicted to it, and her annoyingly annoying stubborn never-give-up gaze made him love the small bunny even more.
Okay, so he admittedly admit to his self that he has feelings for the fluffball, more than the "besttest of best friends" of how she liked to describe them. It's straight up love. He finally realized that long ago after many conflicting battles between his heart and brain. But a fox can't just straight up admit that kind of love to a bunny. Interspecies may be legal, but not exactly common. Not to mention frowned upon by some idiots of this city who can't get a grip and move on. First, he needs to find the perfect moment to tell her. But also first, they're supposed to solve a case given to them by Chief to…um… uh… there's this thing… or something… what were they supposed to do again?
"Hey Carrots, not that I forgot or anything, but what did Chief want us to do again? I was kind of napping halfway through his oh-so-interesting yelling so-"
"You FORGOT?" she said, nearly slamming the breaks.
Nick raised a defensive paw. "I didn't forget. I slept through it. There's a difference."
Judy groaned in agony as she pinched her pink wittle nose. Nick smiled again. She's really cute when she gets angry at him.
"People filed reports of a monster seen here in the city."
Soda nearly exploded out of Nick's nose as he struggled to contain his laugh. "Really, Carrots? A monster? Are you sure it's not some lame story told by paranoid mothers to their kids to keep them running off at night?"
But he did have to admit. Relaxing with his favorite bunny during the beautiful night in such a beautiful place searching for a made-up monster is always better than boring meter duty.
She jabbed a case file at his ribs. "You wouldn't joke around so much if you saw this."
Might as well as amuse himself with this monster. Nick opened the file and went through various photos. "You know what's funny?"
Judy kept her eyes on the road. "What?"
"That every chance someone has evidence of a monster, it's always taken with the crappiest camera to ever exist," he chuckled and closed the file. "I mean, why does every single dang picture have to be blurry? What's wrong with taking a video, or at least, a selfie with the thing?"
"So you do admit it exists!"
"Ok. Ok. I do. I was wrong to think that there wasn't something running around these parts."
Ha ha! He admits he's wrong! Another tally point for Officer Hopps!
"I do find a shaved monkey running around in a black sweater to be a little weird," he later finished, loving the frustration that pinched her entire face together.
The fox smiled triumphantly, and prepared to reward himself with another savory sip of his soda. But as soon as it reached his lips, Judy slammed the breaks without a single warning to her oblivious partner. The drink that the fox once drank and loved, came gushing out of its can and splattered his fur with soon-to-be-sticky liquid.
"Real mature…" he muttered, flinging some off his soaked arm.
She heard none of it. She was too busy bolting out the car door and heading straight for the suspiciously suspicious dark alley.
"Hey, Carrots, where you going!" Nick called after her, rushing out and did his best to follow.
She jumped in his direction, but even when running backwards, the bunny's still fast as hell. "I've spotted it, Nick! And there's no way I'm letting it get away!" she cheered and focused everything into the chase.
"Dammit, not again," he seethes. In those rare moments of the fox's life, his usual cool, calm demeanor completely shattered and revealed full blown worry. When he became enrolled in the force, he soon found Carrots can be a little too devoted to the job sometimes, and by little he means hugely devoted. And all the time it nearly gives him a heart attack as he's paralyzed into watching her run into danger's source without a moment's hesitation. And all the time adrenaline-mixed fear pushes him to run after as a million questions raced through his head. What if I find her dead on the ground, bloodied and ripped apart like the fragile carrot she is? Was the question that screamed the loudest.
Thankfully, by the time he reached the alley's end, he found her unharmed, but really REALLY pissed. Not the kind of pissed that he enjoys seeing. It was far beyond that. It's the kind of pissed that sends shivers down your spine and your inner coward begs for you to run.
"Um, did you-"
"Quiet!" she roared with an upheaved palm. From each buzzing bug that passed, her big ears twitched to any sound emitted. Ranging from Nick's heavy breathing that became a white ghost in the cold air to the occasional static of the lamp light overhead.
"Oh, biscuits! I lost it!" Judy wasn't one to cuss, another trait Nick came to love. Dammit was translated to biscuits. Oh my shit was translated to cheese and crackers, probs his favorite one. And the famed go fuck yourself was hilariously turned into go shove a carrot up your donkey.
It was moments like this in the job Nick had to calm her down, despite how much fun it was seeing her stomp the ground like crazy.
"If Chief hears about this…"
Nick easily silenced her worrying with ruffle to the head. "If Chief hears about this then we'll tell him this whole case is full of cheese and crackers."
"But-"
"Now, c'mere!"
Guard down, the small bunny was magically swooped from the ground and embraced by the large fox's strong hold. She freaked out and continually kicked the air with such fury that it'd probably knock some of the fox's teeth out if he held her the other way around.
"Nick, let me down!"
"When I feel like it," he nibbled into her ear.
Not laughing felt impossible. No. Is impossible when the fox began to playfully tug those fluffy ears of hers. Then when his sharp black claws tackled her extremely ticklish armpits, she completely lost it, laughing up such a storm that pretty much everyone in this dark sorry neighborhood could hear.
But Nick couldn't care the slightest. He loved having the sweet nectar of her joy fill his ears, the fluffiness of those ears of hers as he nibbled both at the same time, and the wonderful softness of her fur as he nuzzled it without remorse.
Then, the moment when he pulled her ears back enough that they were looking at the bright sky together, laughing and smiling all the way, a strange creature gaped an O at them.
Everything became a staring contest. Two pairs of frozen unwavering eyes gazing up at another almost hidden in the darkness.
…
…
…
"Sup," the creature said, raising a greeting hand.
In an instant, Judy wiggled out of Nick's now dead hug and unsheathed her tranquilizer gun. "Officer Hopps of the ZPD! By the order and power of the law, you're coming with us!"
Well, that escalated quickly.
"Whoa there, calm yoself," it spoke calmly. "And can you make that speech any dramatically longer than it had to be? Oh, and cool shades, bro." It finished that last sentence smiling honestly at the fox.
The voice was… female as far as Nick could tell. Young too. Like whoever owns it was barely out of her teen years.
"Ma'am, I will shoot!" She had a clear shot through the fire escape's open rails. "So I suggest you get down, now!"
Nick leaned his arm over her head. "Better do as she says. Fluff here can be a real-"
Judy stomped his foot.
"Ow!"
"Ok, if it means it's gonna stop you abusing your boyfriend."
A bunny has never looked so menacing with a gun before. "He is not my boyfriend!"
Nick blushed, hid his face, and giggled like an innocent school boy.
As expected, Judy's ears easily caught it and she elbowed him. "Shut up!"
The figure dropped from the darkness and into the dim light, but its back was turned on them. Judy's seriousness grew even more serious as she trained her gun further in line for the creature. Nick's grew too, a bit anyways. He's just curious to see what the fuss was all about and not go all guns blazing.
Very pain snakingly slow, it turned.
Now, being who he is, Nick knows every single kind of animal to be expected in Zootopia. He's made questionably-legal deals with all of them. Why? Because he's the goddamn Nick Wilde, that's why. But… but this THING was something he never encountered before.
He's seen furless animals before, but never as naked as the thing in front of him. Not a single patch on it, revealing brown skin that shivered in the merciless cold. It also wore shoes, a rare sight to see in the city, a black T-shirt that had MLG etched onto it, and ripped blue jeans stained with the grime of days running across this dingy neighborhood. Oh, as it turns out, the thing did actually have fur, but in the form of long black strings that only grew over its head that veiled over dark brown orbs that anyone would perceive black at first look.
"Hands up!"
Because that always works.
It made another slow attempt, releasing its hands pockets. But the fox caught a glimmer in its eye.
Out of nowhere, it pulled out a futuristic-looking orange gun, the sudden shock blowing across their faces. "Would you look at that; I have a gun too. Well, a Nerf gun to be exacto." It pulled a long handle attached to the back of the gun, and aimed its plastic foam dart. "It'll still hurt like hell, though. I know because I shot myself a few times. It'd be probably best if you don't edge me into shooting one of you."
"Ma'am, if you would kindly-"
"Nah, surrendering sounds too main stream. Besides, I've never 1v1ed a bunny before. Do you think it'll be fun?"
Nick rolled his eyes and glared. "And I thought I was a smooth talker. Listen, just make things easy for us and surrender. It's passed little Cottontail's bedtime and I kind have to tuck her in. She gets grumpy in the morning without her beauty sleep."
The standoff never wavered. "Sorry, fox man. I've been running around these parts while freaks like you chase me like I'm Bigfoot for days now. I'm having a bit of a trust issue, and if you ask me, now's not really a good time for me to be on the History Channel's stupid creature documentary."
Judy was never one to make the first move with the gun no matter the danger. "Please. I don't want to have to hurt you. You're confused and becoming a misunderstood threat to the city. I'm just going to take you in back at the station and I'll have the whole thing sorted out for you."
"What's with this I, I'm, and I'll stuff, partner? Planning to take all the credit and get that raise?" Nick joked, successfully lightening the mood.
The creature lowered its gun, convinced, and Judy relinquished her focus.
Another successful mission the satisfied fox thought. I didn't get hurt. Carrots didn't get hurt. We're going to get that raise. And not a single-
"Sounds good," it said. "But tell me… do you bleed?"
Unsure, she answered with a simple "No."
It had its gun back on them faster than they could react. "You will…"
The weak pop was the loudest explosion ever in existence. The bullet of plastic foam spiraled and tore through the air as it made its way for the bunny gripped tightly in fear's hold.
Instinct kicked in and the world was put on hold. Nick dove right in front of her, taking the full force of the powerful blast square on his chest. The bullet bounced off and he roared in agony, then slumped to the ground, and in Judy's eyes, dead at her feet.
His fallen sunglasses echoed in her ears.
"No!" she cried through broken tears and fired the tranquilizer. The dart pierced through the creature's shoulder.
The drug immediately kicked in and wobbled the creature into a drunken dance. Falling to its knees, it whispered its final words. "Nailed it..." before face slamming the ground.
Judy wasted no time to kneel before her fallen comrade. Having no idea what to do as her hands stuttered around him, it felt as though the entire world was coming down on her, crushing her feeble body in unbearable weight. "No, this can't be happening…" she whimpered.
Out of all the missions they did as partners, none of them ended with one of them dying just like that in an instant. What happened to arresting the bad guy then going out together for some donuts?
"…Judy…"
Judy carefully took his failing hand with her own, as if any moment she could break it. "I'm here, Nick! Please… please don't die on me! Just hold on! I'll call for help and-"
Dying light flickered in his eyes and he coughed for her to stop. "It's too late, Carrots… heh heh. Who would've thought that one bullet would end the great and handsome Nick Wilde?"
She didn't laugh. Not this time.
"But I have to tell you something before I go. I never had the courage to tell you. But seeing how this'll be the last chance I'll get, please, do me a favor and listen?"
Judy saw no trickery in his dimming gaze. She nodded in understanding, but her heart refused to accept reality.
"The first time we met, I had this… feeling inside of me, but you know how me and Mr. Feelings get along, right?" He went in for another laugh, but a sickly cough punched it back down. "Anyways, I shoved it down in whatever dark corner my mind still has, but the more I spent with you as an awesome cop… it grew until I couldn't keep it in my head." With a hand gently lifting her face from his watery chest, Nick smiled her favorite smile. The kind where it always made her feel like he committed no crimes at all, but in truth, he was waiting for her to find out what sinister prank he had in store for her.
"Officer Carrots… I… I've always felt…"
At this point, Judy returned to dumping her tears in his already soaked chest. If he's really picking a situation like this to really reveal those well-hidden feelings of his, then this really is-
"I've always felt like your breath stank too much like carrots."
That one sentence knocked her head back up. At first, she stared wide-eyed, but then, a predatory scowl.
He smirked, that damn annoying smirk of his. "Gotcha," was all he had to say before she exploded into fury.
Unrelenting, but amusing to watch, Judy beat her tiny little paws into his chest. He laughed.
"C'mon, admit I got you!"
"I thought you were dead!"
"And it was hilaaarious."
Her breathing became violent and uncontrollable. "Go shove a carrot up your donkey you…you… you DORK!"
"Dork, huh? I like that name."
"Oh yeah?" she huffed loudly and shoved some distance between them. "Then how about I call you a-"
"And I don't think I wanna know-" Nick interrupted, jumping back up and silencing her mouth with a claw. "But I do wanna know what exactly we are dealing with here." He pointed at the figure slumped on the ground, snoozing.
Judy regained her composure and joined staring at the strange wonder snoring in front of them. They turned their heads at each other, waiting for the other to make the first move.
Like a total gentlemen, Nick laid out his arms. "You first."
She punched him in the gut. He oofed in pain. For someone so small, she can really drive a hard punch! Let's not forget rude. She grabbed his shirt before he could even take a breather after the attack, and she dragged him and his complaints towards the fallen body.
Once the duo reached it, and as professionals in the job, they had no idea what to do.
Nick gently kicked its ribs and got a loud snore in response. He looked over at Judy, but she could only shrug. Then an interesting apparel caught his eye. He never noticed until now, but a black backpack was strapped onto its back. He removed the bag.
"What are you doing?" Judy asked.
He didn't answer. Instead, he assured her with a simple wink. However, there's a problem. Each pulling clip on each zipper was cuffed together to another by small three-digit number locks. Impossible to open without the combination. No matter. A predator's claws were made for ripping things apart.
But as soon as Judy saw his plan, she immediately shouted, "Stop! Don't do that!"
"Why shouldn't I? I'm only examining evidence."
"Because those are an innocent citizen's belongings, not a criminal's. The ZPD can't just ruin their possessions like that. We may be the law, but we're no way above it."
"Not a criminal, eh? Last time I checked, it tried to shoot you. And I, being the lovable, brave hero, came to your rescue."
"And did you die?"
"No, of course not." Then he rubbed his sore chest. "Still hurt, though."
She stepped up and swiped the bag away. "Then we bring its stuff with us, unharmed."
Nick wanted to continue the argument with something snappy, but her fierce glare shut his mouth.
"And if you say anything that even REMOTELY triggers me…" She picked up the creature's gun, searched for the bullet, dropped it in through the fire hole, pulled the handle, and aimed. "… I'll fire this baby up your donkey."
The fox shifted his gaze, the threat taking effect. "Dumb bunny…" he muttered.
"You know I heard that! Now, help me get this thing in the car."
Freezing cold water slapped the human awake, and she awoke to staring at the ceiling's bright yellow light that stung her eyes like an angry wasp. She moved her right hand. It was a little groggy, but what's important is that it could move. She tried moving her left hand, but instead of movement, she got the musical jingle of chains shifting.
Oh great, am I really hand cuffed? College definitely isn't going to accept me back in now.
As her vision took its sweet time to gather in her blurred eyes, she assessed her surroundings. A cute little book shelf where numerable books were neatly stacked to her right. Multiple photos of many different mammals posing happily for the picture to her left. A nice big wooden table in front.
And sitting behind it, a very large buffalo on steroids glared her down. It wore a similar police uniform from the other animals earlier except with just one button unbuttoned. It did nothing but stare as if waiting for her to make the first move. Might as well get things over with. Those sharp horns of his really made her head spin faster than it needs to be.
"Sup," she said, raising a flimsy right.
"Good, you're awake." The voice was gruffly male. "My name is Chief Bogo of the ZPD, and for the night, I will be your interrogator. Rest assured, no harm will come to you. Cooperate and this will be settled quickly."
Who was she to argue against a flippin buffalo chief of some weird police force? She nodded. "Ok, whatever, buffalo guy. Not like I had anything else better to do."
Chief Bogo set his glasses in place, preapred a thin white piece of paper in front of him, and clicked open a pen. "All right, first question: were you apprehended by two officers of mine?"
"Officers?"
With a black hoof, he guided her eyes to a fox and a bunny standing professionally near the desk. The bunny refused to look at her and continue staring at the wall, but the sly fox waved and twinkled his fingers at her.
"Yeah."
He wrote that down. "What were you doing in the alley at this hour?"
A mischievous grin broke through. "I was trying to hide out in someplace as dark as a basement so I could wait for Half-Life 3 to be officially confirmed like everyone else on Twitch."
Chief Bogo started a little hesitant to write that down, and Nick and Judy stared at her confusingly.
This should be fun.
"What species are you? Never seen any of your kind here."
"I'm what is known as a… human. I think here, I'm about as rare as a shiny Pokémon. I'm also 25% Italian and 75% Asian… or Pacific Islander? Hey, are Filipinos considered Asians or Pacific Islanders? I could never really tell. My mom says one thing and my dad says the other."
The strangeness of this conversation would only grow.
"And who are your parents?"
She shrugged. "Oops, sorry. I just forgot. I like to do that sometimes. But if Goku and Saitama were to have a kid, that kid would probably most definitely be me."
His temper rose with his handwriting, "When were you born?"
"March 21."
Finally, a sensible answer.
"What year?"
"The Year of Luigi."
The scribbling stopped. "Say again, what year?"
"The Year of Luigi, Mr. Sir."
"And when was that?"
"It's today, actually. As much as it was yesterday, and so will it be tomorrow. Because the Year of Luigi never ends…'
Judy huffed, then muttered to her partner. "She's weird."
She meant it too. Not a single trace of sense made home in her statements. This suspect is flat out crazy. Maybe it was a mistake to bring her in?
"Where do you live?"
"In South Park on the Kanye West side of Gotham City. Can't miss it."
Bogo slammed his fist on the table and the papers nearly flew. He's pretty much boiling at this point. Patience burned in the raging fire. "Are you part of any group, gang, and/or organization? And if you are, are any of them criminal so we can arrest that smartass mouth of yours?"
She took delicate minutes to think. "Well, I am part of the Illuminati."
"And who the hell are they?"
"A fake, made-up group generated from nerds so YouTubers can post video theories and conspiracies of their existence to get subscribers. Kind of a smart idea if you ask me."
"Which I DIDN'T. What the hell kind of answers are these?"
"The answering kind."
Nick elbowed and whispered into his partner's ear. "She's good."
When you get an honest-to-God compliment from the crafty fox, he really means it. With each randomly weird word that babbled outta her mouth, she spoke through it with an extremely straight face. It's like no matter how ridiculous or unbelievable her crazy sentences were, they were simple truths being spoken through a person sent from the heavens above. Also, bonus points for tipping Chief off the edge. That's something he can respect.
Unparalleled anger subsided into a groan and a slap on the face. "All right, so it seems I can't help you if you're not willing to help me."
"It seems so, Mr. Sir."
"But AT LEAST give us your name."
Her face brightened. "Sure, fam. Give me some pencil and paper first so I could write it down. Trust me, it'll be easier that way."
The chief obliged and placed the equipment in front of her. She wrote on the paper with her tongue sticking out because her hard-working head had no room for it. Once finished, the chief snatched the paper and read. He showed it back to her, far from amused. "This. Is not. Your name."
-xXx WingKuribo#BayonettaMain#BrokenCharacter xXx
"It totally is. You see, that's my gamer tag when I do some online gaming and pass the salt on to some scrubs."
Chief Bogo headed for the exit, one storm of a headache coming. "Officer Hopps, Wilde… with me. NOW."
"So Mr. Sir, what's the plan?" Nick playfully said, hands in pockets.
The chief massaged his temples and groaned in agony. "You two live in the same apartment now, right?"
They both nodded.
It's only been a recent thing. Fox and bunny, predator and prey, living together in harmony, and by harmony, I mean having the occasional verbal fight over whose job was it now to exterminate the piling tower of dishes, or most of all, who gained mastery over the remote that bestowed absolute power over the TV. Nevertheless, Nick loved it. He got to tickle fight and cuddle with his little carrot more times than he could wish for. It's only thanks to the grateful citizens' donation for the heroes who saved the city. Though Judy did protest, saying the crap about how it's her duty and all, the crafty fox always finds a way to get what he wants.
"Good. Because she's going to be living in with you guys."
Judy seemed a bit less enthusiastic than Nick. "WHAT!?" she screeched. Her ears were pulled back by invisible rage as she scowled at her chief with evil intent. If she had predatory teeth, she'd be snarling with them. "Are you really expecting me to-"
Bogo raised his hands for silence. "I AM and you WILL. That's an order!"
Nick stepped up. "Not that I mind, but mind enlightening to us why we gotta keep this thing in our cozy little home? Sounds dangerous."
"That's why I'm assigning you two to find out. Is she dangerous? Will she pose a threat to the city we're working hard to protect? And most importantly…" He looked through the door's glass. She was picking her nose. "…who exactly is she? My other officers will likely be too rough on her so that's why I need-"
Nick quickly finished for him. "Need your most lovable members of the force to babysit her?"
"Basically. Oh, and for your mission tomorrow, you'll be having a paid day off."
That's like celebrating your birthday twice a year in underwater space! Hardly anyone in this job gets a paid day off! No way will he refuse this offer! "All right. I'm game. Carrots?" He looked over his shoulder for her. She pouted at him, but one famous smirk persuaded her to nod her head with rust in her gears.
"Remember, DON'T let her wander. The ZPD needs to keep a good eye on her."
The duo nodded.
"Ok, let's get you guys started."
All three went back inside the office and uncuffed the human who made no protest. Nick and Judy led her out while Chief Bogo saluted them. As they guided her to the receptionist desk, the fox got a good estimate of the human's height. She stood about a few inches shorter than your average wolf, but still towered a good couple inches over the fox. Not that he cared about height, but wondered how Judy felt. This girl was cool enough for Nick to like her, despite how fun their first encounter went.
Judy didn't even want to look at her.
"Soooooooooooo, what now?" she asked. The three stood around near the circly desk, the awkwardness thick in the air. "Am I going to be left out in the streets again or something?"
Nick chuckled and leaned on Judy's head. "Well, consider it your lucky day! Carrots and I are taking you in in our lovely abode."
Better than sleeping on top a building's roof. "What's the occasion?"
"A wonderful paid day o –oof!" Another quick punch to the gut silenced him. "I mean… because as the ZPD, we can't let a lost… um… what exactly are you again?"
She prepared to answer with something like I'm the goddamn Batman, but Judy mumbled faster. "She's a human… You really like to forget, don't you?"
"Right! We can't let a lost human wander back into the dangers of Zootopia in the late of night. So you're crashing with us until we get the whole thing sorted out. Now wait here, and we'll be back. My partner and I are gonna switch to our casual clothing."
"Yo, wait!" she called for them as the two made their way towards the locker rooms. "Can I least get my stuff back first? There's a lot of things I literally can't afford to lose in there. Like my 3DS and stuff!"
Nick turned and moonwalked. "Don't worry! I've already called Clawhauser to bring in your stuff. He should be here any minute."
They were gone before she could ask who the hell Clawhauser was, or at least, looked like. Moments passed in boredom. Impatient, incessant tappings of her foot echoed off the stadium-like department's walls. She leaned against the table, struggling for her head not to dip to her sleepy downfall. Any minute turned out to be an eternal lag.
Ugh, this is just like history class.
Then a sharp tap to the shoulder spasmed her into defense mode! She whirled around, had both hands in karate chop position, and fearsome fire burned away the drowsiness! "Careful!" she warned. "I've been playing a lot of Street Fighter so I'm prepared to-"
A chubby, cheerful smile doused the fire. "Oh, aren't you a cute little thing!" an obese cheetah cheered leaning on the desk with his elbows. "I just wanna pinch those cheeks of yours and…" It was about that moment he finally noticed her stunned silence. "Oops, sorry! I can be a little clueless sometimes, but is being called cute by another species considered bad to your kind?"
It took a second for her brain to process another thought. Then she smiled. "Nah, fam. In my neighborhood, being called cute is a compliment. So thanks! You're pretty cute too."
He blushed and swiped a grateful paw. "Aaaw, thanks! I'm Clawhauser by the way. You are?"
She took his paw and firmly shook it. There was some sprinkles in there. "Just a girl who references for fun."
Clawhauser didn't seem mad. He actually started to like her more. "Aah, a mysterious type, aren't cha? Well, I've brought your stuff over like Nick asked. Have you met him?"
"The fox man?"
"That's right! What's your thoughts 'bout him?"
"Meh, he's cool in all, but my brain keeps telling me not to trust him, but then again, I'm sort of a rebel so I'll trust him anyways."
Clawhauser exploded with delight. "Sure are nice for trusting a fox right off the bat! How about his partner, the bunny?"
Now that one required some thinking time. The bunny did threatened to shoot her, but it was for her own safety, right? Then there's that time when she actually shot her..."She's… how should I put it… bossy. Especially when it comes between her and her boyfriend."
"So you think they're a good couple too!" Clawhauser cheered triumphantly.
"You too?"
"Yeah, of course. Every day I sit here and I see those two giving each other the googly eyes." He stopped for a moment, then placed a claw under his chin. "Well, I see Nick do it anyways. I'm not sure if Judy feels the same way. But I'm betting my two boxes of breakfast donuts that when Nick finally confesses, there's gonna be a wedding the next month!"
"And I'm betting my bag of Doritos that you're gonna be the best man."
He blushed redder than ever, "Aww, thanks. Hey, while we wait for those two, wanna check out this super fun app on my phone?"
She nodded. "Sure. Better than standing around here doing nothing."
The cheetah cheered his loudest cheer and pulled out his phone. Then, an upbeat song played that nearly compelled her to dance along with it. She bent over the table to get a better look. There, a very pop starry gazelle danced along with a buff tiger… who had the face of a chubby cheetah?
"You're a great dancer… Clawhauser," the female robotic voice said.
"Oh, I'm sorry. Is this a little too weird for you?" Clawhauser said, embarrassed. "If it is, I can show you something else that's-"
"Ayy lmao!" the human suddenly laughed with tears falling. "Is that really you? That's cool, man! Hey, mind if you could get my face in there?"
"So, mind telling me why you hate her so much?" Nick said in his usual attire (tie, green shirt, khakis) as he strolled down the hallway near Judy with an ever knowing smirk across his lips.
Judy, in a pink flannel shirt and plain pants, crossed her arms. "I don't hate her. I just don't like her so much."
The fox shrugged. "Ok then. Mind telling me why you don't like her so much?"
"I was okay with simply bringing her in here and finding out who she is, but then finding out she's a complete nut? Then later finding out I'm supposed to deal with that kind of nut back in our apartment?" Fueld by fury, she sped walk down the hall. "I already get enough headaches from you!"
Nick stopped and prepared to give a witty response. But then thought better of it and continued walking. Later, he found Judy frozen at the spot. Nick waved a paw over her eyes. No response. "Carrots, what's gotten into you?"
A familiar song flicked his ears. He turned for the direction… and gaped.
Clawhauser clapped like crazy for the human who danced nonstop to the beat of the cheetah's phone. Her arms waved. Her hair waved. And her legs sidestepped like no one has ever sidestepped before in the known universe.
Judy was the first to break free. She elbowed Nick awake and smiled at the cheerful human. "Never mind. I think I might be starting to like her…"
"And this," Nick said, opening the door for the human. "Is our lovely home."
Now, the first thing that hit the human was a flat screen TV. It wasn't the biggest TV in the world, but perfect enough for any good games to play on. A plushy, green couch sat in front of the TV with its back turned on a pretty decent looking kitchen. And on opposite walls, two different doors leading to what's probably the other's bedrooms.
Nick led her towards the one bathroom they had where she gratefully washed away the grime of nonstop traveling across the streets. Once she stepped outta the shower, she fetched her last batch of fresh clothes from her bag and exited the bathroom wearing a simple blue T-shirt and black shorts. All the while, Nick waited for her with a pillow and a blanket. He gave the items to her and pointed to the couch.
"Sorry for not having another cozy bed for ya," Nick apologized, scratching the back of his head.
She waved off his apology and gave an assuring smile. "No worries, man. I've slept on the couch plenty of times when I do some overnight gaming. No problem."
Nick returned her smile and headed for bed.
"Yo Nick, wait."
He stopped and turned. The human was on her phone, tapping something in. "Yeah?"
"What's your wifi password?"
"Hand me your phone," he yawned and stretched.
It took a few seconds, but as soon as she got her phone back, she had full bars of internet! Yes! She mentally cheered.
"All right, good night," Nick fare welled and closed his bedroom door.
The human settled to a comfortable positon on the couch where she could stare at the ceiling all night monologuing about her current situation. Usually, when a human finds him/herself in a strange new world ruled by talking animals, they'd go straight for the history desiring to know what there is to know.
However, this human wasn't much of a history person.
Instead of typing in on Zoogle's search box what's Zootopia's history? or some boring crap like that, she put in dank memes. She struggled not laugh too loud. Judy heard it all, unfortunately, as she twisted throughout her bed against the nonstop, hardly-contained giggles. With each picture she scrolled through giggling all the way, she found that they were essentially the same as the ones back home. Just that here the memes had pictures of animals rather than humans. Still, they had their contagious quotes that flew very much around the modern world.
Whatever. She really lost it when she typed in the dankest of memes.
Nick leaned against his bedroom door, smiling triumphantly. Tonight, he got a head start on discovering who this human is. Back then, when she handed him her phone, he got a good look at the name sitting at the top of the screen.
"Andrea…" he whispered. "No matter what… I'm going to get that raise."
Usually, when someone writes about a human in a strange new world, he/she is afraid and confused. For this story, I want my human to be totally weird and be totally cool with interacting with the people of Zootopia. Also, don't be fooled about the easiness of this story so far. There will be dark, depressing moments between Nick and Judy. Then we have Andrea spouting about all kinds of references to make things fun for me.
Zootopia is owned by the all powerful Disney. I claim no ownership of their characters.
Anyways, I hope you guys like this chapter and I hope you review your thoughts on this.