a/n - thank you everyone who reviewed my last Beetlejuice fanfic! i'm not much good at writing things with chapters though, so i'm afraid it's another oneshot ; this one is inspired by lyrics to the Tiger Lillies' song "Bad". lyrics and characters don't belong to me.

I'll wait outside your school
I'll seem so nice, I'll seem so cool
In my expensive car
I promise I'll make you a star

"Bad", The Tiger Lillies

A collective sigh of relief filled the room.
The bell was ringing; finally school was over. The dreary silence of working pupils was replaced with loud voices, clattering furniture and books snapping shut. Clare's gang crowded around the blonde, eagerly waiting instructions and directions to whatever party was happening tonight. Even Prudence and Bertha stood to the edges of the group - not in support of Clare, but hoping to find out where everyone else was going to, who was dating who, whatever gossip they could sink their teeth into.

They almost didn't notice Lydia quietly shutting her bag, filled with the weekend homework, and lifting it ready to slip out the classroom.
"Lydia!" waved Prudence, running over to Lydia's desk, "don't disappear so quickly!"
Now they were sixteen, and Prudence was nearly a head taller than Lydia. The dark haired girl still found it strange to think that Prudence had once been such a tiny little kid. Bertha ran over to join them.
"Aaron's having a house party tonight!" Bertha whispered excitedly.
"Me and Bertha are so there, Aaron's house parties are always crazy! Do you wanna come get coffee with us?"
"Then we can go to my house and get ready! I just got this new eyeshadow and-"

"Sorry," Lydia smiled peacefully.
There was an awkward silence between the three of them. Lydia pushed her chair under her desk before explaining "I already had plans for tonight. Sorry guys. But I bet you'll have lots of fun at Aaron's. Drink one for me!" she winked and walked out the room.

"Hmph…" Bertha sighed.
"What do you think her plans are? They must be important…" Prudence whispered.
"Forget what her plans are, what's more important than a house party like this one?!" Bertha pulled a face. "What's she up to?" She stormed out of the classroom in pursuit of Lydia, Prudence hurrying to follow.

They reached the door of the school. Bertha looked all around the courtyard but didn't see Lydia, until suddenly Prudence pointed to the girl, walking out the gate alone.
"Let's wait and see where she goes…" Prudence pleaded. Bertha nodded and they watched from the entrance.
Lydia turned left at the gate and headed down the street.
"Hey what the…Lydia goes right to go home, why's she going left?"

Unaware that her friends were watching, Lydia tried to walk quickly down the street to avoid suspicion. Parked at the end of the street was a green, convertible car with large headlights. As she walked past it she traced her fingers along the hood. Without a word, she threw her schoolbag into the backseat and opened the door to the passenger seat.

Bertha and Prudence gasped.
"Who is that?" Prudence whispered, "Lydia's never mentioned anyone who owns a green car like that…"
"Nobody our age could afford a car…except maybe Clare," Bertha mumbled.
As Lydia snapped her seatbelt on, Bertha and Prudence tried to get a better picture of the driver - he was at least 30 if not older, wearing a pinstripe suit and a hat preventing the two from seeing his face clearly, with shoulder-length blonde hair falling from underneath it.

Lydia flicked her hair behind her shoulder and gave the man a dazzling smile. He returned it with a sickly grin, and the car sped off down the street.

Bertha and Prudence stood speechless.
Not so speechless was Clare, who had been standing next to them for a few minutes now.
"OH. MY. GAWD!" she screamed, startling the other two. Bertha and Prudence hurried away before Clare could try and question them about the incident; after all, they knew just as little about it as she did.

But at that moment Clare wasn't interested in asking them anything anyway.
Lydia, that freak Lydia Deetz, had just driven away. In an expensive-looking convertible. With an older man. If anyone else other than her dorky friends found out about it, Clare's reputation would take some damage. Lydia Deetz was dating an older man! Measures had to be taken fast…and Clare knew just what to do. She smiled.

---

"Hey doll face," winked Beetlejuice as Lydia slid along the side of Doomie, running her hand over the hood, "just throw your bag in the back." She did, then sat down elegantly, fastened her seatbelt, and flicked her hair behind her.
"Hello yourself, Beej," she said, giving him her most dazzling smile. He grinned widely and slammed his foot down on the pedal, making Doomie zoom off with a yelp.
"Lyds, I think your friends saw us." Her smile faded instantly.
"Damn…" she muttered, looking over the side of Doomie, "I tried to get out quickly but they caught me and invited me to some house party…I'll just have to think of an excuse to tell them on Monday..."
The ghost slipped his arm around her shoulder.
"You're not regretting letting me and Doomie out more often into the real world, are ya Babes?"
She turned back towards him and smiled. "No…but we just need to be more careful…I can't slip up." She snatched his hat off his head playfully and put it on.

"Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice!"

---

Miss Shannon winced at the noise.
Who was knocking on her door on a Friday afternoon!? Didn't these kids just want to go home like everyone else and get drunk and cause trouble or something? She strided over to her door irritably, grumbling under her breath something along the lines of "Should have been an accountant like Father told me" and flung open the door.
"Can I help you, Miss Brewster?" she sighed.
"Oh, Miss Shannon!" Clare exclaimed melodramatically, "I think Lydia's in serious trouble!"
"Miss Deetz in trouble? Whatever is the matter?" Miss Shannon said, slightly surprised that one of her more attentive students would be in trouble.
"Well…I'm trusting you to keep this secret…" Clare hid a wicked smile behind her hands, then looked up imploringly at Miss Shannon. "I just saw Lydia get into a car…with a totally creepy old man! But before I could stop her, he drove off with her! I simply couldn'tbear it if something should, like, happen to her or something."
Miss Shannon looked shocked. "Thank you Clare. I shall call her parents immediately."

As soon as Miss Shannon had shut the door to her office, Clare cackled.

---

"Home sweet home!" squealed Lydia as she stepped inside the Roadhouse.
"Hey, it's not your house, it's mine!" whined Beetlejuice.
"And mine!" Ginger snapped, dangling down from the ceiling.
"C'est le mien!" Jacques grunted in between push-ups.

Ignoring them Lydia skipped into the kitchen, Beetlejuice skulking behind her. Away from the spider and skeleton, Lydia turned to face Beetlejuice, looking worried.
"Beej…who exactly did you see watching us?" The ghost scratched his chin thoughtfully.
"Well there was Bertha and Prudence…and…then as we were leaving I saw some blonde with a fake tan and…oh shit."
Lydia turned paler than usual. "Clare? Clare saw us?"

Before she could panic Beetlejuice threw his arm around Lydia's shoulder and nuzzled his head against her cheek. "Forget about it, babes. Clare can go to hell; if she causes trouble for you, I'll cause trouble for her, know what I mean?" he reassured her, grinning wickedly and wrapping his other arm around her waist. Lydia looked up into his eyes, then looked away moving her head to the side of his face, pretending to be shy. She checked quickly that Jacques and Ginger weren't looking.

Brushing away his greasy hair she gently nibbled on his ear, then whispered "What if she tells my parents?"
"Then run away with me," he laughed.

---

Delia paced the kitchen back and forth, waiting for the front door to open.
"Will you just relax, Delia? I'm sure it's all some big mistake and it wasn't Lydia getting into the car, and Miss Shannon has just got us all worked up for nothing. There's probably some good explanation for the whole thing, and-"
"THEN WHERE IS LYDIA, CHARLES?" screamed Delia, "she hasn't come home! She didn't tell us where she was going, we called Prudence's mother and she wasn't at their house, and she wasn't at Bertha's house either! What if she's been kidnapped? WHAT IF SHE'S-"

"What's all the screaming about?" Lydia said softly.

Her parents snapped their heads around to the kitchen door. Lydia stood calmly with her usual sad smile, holding a striped ball in one hand.
"WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN, YOUNG LADY?" Delia shouted.
"In my room, mother."
"I thought you checked her room, Charles!" Delia snapped at her husband.
"I…uh…I did…" he gulped.
"Is there a problem, mother? Father?" their daughter asked, looking tired.
"Miss Shannon rang us!" Delia said, drawing herself to her full height. "One of the students saw you getting into a car with an older man! Is this true?"
"No, mother," Lydia said sadly, "I came home as quickly as I could. It must have been someone else."
"Good! Because I won't have some paedophile corrupting my little Lydia!" Delia snapped.

Lydia nodded placidly while Delia continued to rant at her husband, then tiptoed up to her room. She shut the door as quietly as she could.
Then she set the striped ball she had been holding down on her bed.

"You can come out now," she whispered.
"Don't wanna," grumbled the ball. Lydia sighed.
"Please, Beej?"
"No."
"Look, Delia didn't mean what she said offensively or anything…"
He morphed back into his normal self. "Oh no, I'm just a creepy old man, a paedophile corrupting her precious little Lydia," he spat, mocking Delia's high pitched voice.

But Lydia just smiled.
"Oh Beej," she sighed, "you are old, you are creepy, and you probably are corrupting me with all the mean pranks we play on people. People just…assume things. They couldn't possibly know we've been friends for years."
He grumbled and turned away. "Even you think I'm old and creepy…"

"I don't care," she said firmly. She grabbed his chin and pulled it towards her, repeating, softly this time, "I don't care".
She kissed him gently.
"Am I bad?" he asked her with a cautious grin.
"Yes," she giggled, kissing him again, "I wouldn't want you to be anything else."