Disclaimer: I do not own DNANGEL or its characters.
Warnings: Suggested Rape, Satoshi angst, Abuse.
oO0Oo
It doesn't matter, as Satoshi lays there sad and broken, scared and alone. It doesn't matter, nothing matters. Nothing. Not the tears on his cheeks, or the blood on his legs. The dull ache of his back, the broken glasses on the floor. How could it matter when he's taken everything away that does?
His Jealous angel is done, spent and tied, asleep in his mind. Satoshi wishes he could have that kind of rest. Where he's only aware of the bathroom sink which is dripping a steady 'Drip. Drip. Drip.' that drives him to the edge of insanity and back. The rhythm he wished he was without. Drip. Drip. Drip. He sobs for no reason other then to see if he can still breath. For some unfair reason, he can, God wont let him die.
He thinks about Daisuke, the cheerful red-head he shares many classes with, the boy he eats lunch with, the boy he wants to hold. He could learn to love him, he's thought this many times. He remembers this like a scar. Sometimes Daisuke hugs him a little too intimate, or whispers something a little too passionate, and he remembers how he could love him. But he also remembers how Daisuke could never understand. Daisuke could never understand him, his life. He's not prepared with his care free smile and loving attitude. He wouldn't understand what its like to be truly sad, truly broken. To lay in the dark scared and alone. To give up hope of rescue, to stop fighting.
Drip. Drip. Drip.
Tell him, Satoshi thinks, tell him what its like to have no innocence. Tell him what its like to be raped again and again until your body has to feeling. How mornings light only exists in your world so you can see the scares someone has left on you. How being beautiful is being regrettable, how being perfect, means being in pain. Explain how it feels when he looks at you, how Krad laughs as he approaches. When you know how it will end. What's it like when you run out of metaphors to justify it, when your backed into a corner you forgot was there. How the blood scream as it exits your veins.
Satoshi wishes he could protect Daisuke from the world. Wishes he could put him in a safe box where the world couldn't hurt him. Daisuke doesn't deserve to be hurt like he is. Daisuke is perfect; the thought of him tainted like this is too much.
Drip. Drip. Drip.
With a groan, he pushes himself up, so he's not quite sitting, but enough to survey the room. Its dark, he turned off the lights. He always turns off the lights. He Doesn't want to see Satoshi. As if direct light will suddenly make it wrong, like its not wrong anyway.
The phone rings, he doesn't want to pick up. But he does, because the ring tone tells him its safe.
Drip. Drip. Drip.
"Hello?" Satoshi asks to fast, in a voice far from his own.
"Hello Sato-kun! You sound awful! You need more sleep? You should try some chicken soup!" Daisuke tells him in one breath.
"I will, thank you Daisuke." Satoshi says, he can almost hear Daisuke beaming over the phone.
"Ok good! Can I walk you to school today?" Satoshi smiles slightly, he's always there for him, even if he doesn't realize it.
"Of course, I'll see you at eight." He whispers, "Good-bye."
"Bye bye." There's a click as the connection ends. Satoshi sighed and hung up. He remembers like a scar, but its not so bad.oO0Oo
A/N: I've been in an Angsty Satoshi mood lately, dont ask me why. I never know... I just felt the need to write Satoshi all 'KRAD'S MEAN TO ME! MY DADDY RAPES ME!' and all that. Oh well. Read and Reveiw.