It is seven at night, right after sunrise. Poison Ivy is in her apartment, watering plants.

"Mommy loves you, you know that? Mommy loves you all. You're the only ones who listen."

She gives one of her plants a kiss.

"Yes, I know I'm never alone with you."

Ivy's eyes widen in disbelief.

"What do you mean we're not alone?"

Suddenly, a window smashes as a crazy clown girl jumps through with a giant mallet raised.

"SNEAK ATTAAAAAAACK!", the clown girl screams.

She madly swings her mallet about, nearly hitting Ivy in the head. Ivy manages to push her back, then vines come up to Ivy's sides, ready to defend her.

"Catch!", the clown girl says, throwing a purple ball at Ivy.

Ivy catches it, but it sprays a green mist in her face. She drops the ball and glares at the clown girl.

"Umm… why aren't ya laughin'?", the clown girl asks.

The vines shoot out toward the clown girl and pin her against a wall.

"Laughing? Are you supposed to be my entertainment for the night?", Ivy asks.

"Nooo. I mean Mistah J gave me that Joker bomb ta kill ya. It's filled with laughin' gas, so why aren't ya laughin'?"

"So, you're saying… Joker. Sent you. To kill me… with poison?"

"Yeah, so?"

"Ahahahahaha! That's a good one. I think I like you, clown girl. It's been too long since I've had a good laugh.", Ivy says, patting the clown girl's head.

"The name's Harley Quinn an' that wasn't even a joke!"

"Are you sure you're not the one he wants dead?", Ivy asks.

Her eyes widen as she stares blankly into the space in front of her. Her eyes become shiny and she starts blinking a lot, only to squeeze her eyes shut, failing to hold back her tears.

"N-no. My Puddin'… he would never—", Harley starts, as her tears now start flooding out of her eyes.

"'Pudding'? 'He?' Don't tell me that you and Joker—"

"What? What are ya gonna say?"

"Harley, you can't be serious…."

"WHY? What's wrong with bein' in love with Mistah J? Everyone always thinks I'm crazy for it. Sometimes I almost believe 'em. Look, Red. If you loved somethin' more than anything else in the world, an' people thought you were crazy fer it, wouldn't ya just wanna take a giant mallet to their face an' smash it in?"

"I… I'm so sorry,", Ivy says as she releases Harley from her vines, "But if he really wants you dead, you can't go back to him! Be reasonable!"

"Wha? No! It can't be over between us! What am I supposed to do with my life now?"

"Harley, your whole life doesn't have to revolve around him."

Harley just blinks at her.

"Well, do you know anything about gardening?"

Harley suddenly looks annoyed.

"Um, okay… what do you usually like to do with your time?"

40 minutes later…

"Harley, are you sure this is a good idea?"

"Hey, ya said you can make me immune ta poisons, right?"

"Yes, but I'm not so sure you should be pushing your immune system to its limits so soon."

"Hey, what's the point of havin' somethin' if ya don't use it?"

"You sure Batman won't be able to just track us down?"

"Of course I'm sure. Ya never had a setup like this before?"

"Well, no. When I'm not gardening, I'm researching organizations that will help restore the environment. When I'm not researching, I'm planning a heist to raise money for those organizations. When I'm not planning a heist—"

"Well, no wonder yer always so grumpy, Red. Ya need ta learn ta take a break an' have some fun!"

"But…"

"Shh. We're live."

"Oh, no."

"Oh, yes. INTRODUCING… HARLEY AN' IVY! DRINKING LITERAL POISON LIVE ON THE DARK WEB!"

"This is a bad idea."

"Yer welcome."

END