Someone Like You
Oneshot/Songfic
Based on the song "Somone Like You" by Adele
By: Burningaugust
A/N: This is my first fanfic/songfic, so please be gentle. I arranged some minor words to accomodate Severus because he's not a woman singing his heart out to a man. Read and rate please. I'd love some feedback. Disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters or lyrics. They all belong to their respective owners. In this case, J.K. Rowling and Adele.
I heard that you're settled down
That you've found a boy
And you're married now
I heard that your dreams came true
I guess he gave you things I didn't give to you
Old friend, why are you so shy?
Ain't like you to hold back or hide from the light
She's getting married now - Lily, that is - to that boy, James Potter. I've nothing left, nothing to fight for. She's made her choice. Actually, she's made that choice so many years ago when she unfriended me and befriended James believing that he changed and became a better person. As I had assumed when I heard about their wedding, I wasn't invited. I wouldn't want to go anyways. It would be too hard to watch her marry the man I truly despise.
She got what she wanted though. A man to love and a man to love her. I could have given her that, love, because I do love her. However, she never has and never will love me. There are just some things she wants that I can't possibly give her, I suppose. But, I don't see how that can even be possible when I'd offer her the world and more.
I hate to turn up out of the blue uninvited
But I couldn't stay away
I couldn't fight it
I had hoped you'd see my face
And that you'd be reminded that for me
It isn't over
I'm just sitting her in my lonely, old house thinking about how Lily who, in just a few hours, will be the new Mrs. Potter. Why am I not doing anything about it? Why am I just sitting here? I may not have been invited, but I have the right to object to her marriage, don't I?
Never mind I'll find someone like you
I wish nothing but the best
For you too
Don't forget me, I begged
I remember you said
Sometimes it lasts in love
But sometimes it hurts instead
Sometimes it lasts in love
But sometimes it hurts instead
I could. I could go to her wedding. Or, I could let her be happy even if it is with Potter. Maybe I could let myself move on after having been so long... No. I can't. I have to, at least, let her know how I feel. I remember when I had attempted to tell he so when we were just fourteen.
"Severus, what is it now?" she asked impatiently.
"Lily, you're my friend right? My best friend? I can tell you anything?" I asked. Would I really have the guts to tell her?
"Of course, Severus! What kind of question is that? We've been best friends since we were ten." She looked at me as if I was an idiot. Maybe I was.
"Lily, there's this girl..." I guess not. I guess I don't have the guts to tell her that "this girl" is her, Lily Evans. Maybe I really am an idiot.
"You never told me you liked anybody. Why are you only telling me this now?"
"I don't know. Can I continue?" I asked, turning to her as she nodded in reply. "There's this girl. I think I might... love her, but she never shows any interest. I don't know what to do. I've felt this way about her since I first met her. It pains me to see her enjoy other people's company rather than my own."
She looked down, staring intently at the ground. Her expression was hard to read. She finally looked up at me, her green eyes just as beautiful as they were yesterday. "Severus, you do know that love is a strong word, don't you?"
"Yes. I know. I do love her. I'm sure of that."
"Does she ever spend a fair amount of time with you? Maybe enough to let you know that you're just friends?" Come to think of it, Lily did that a lot. It wasn't like when we were younger and just starting out at Hogwarts. Back then, she'd spend every moment she could with me. Now that we're older, she tries her best just to squeeze in some time. We're just friends. Nothing more.
"Yeah. I suppose we're just friends." My gaze dropped to the floor, looking down at my shoes and the little smudge on them from when that big seventh year stepped on it.
"Hey, Sev. Look at me." Her hands moved to my chin to lift up my head. Her touch sent chills through my spine. "Maybe it doesn't have to be that way. Maybe if you told her how you felt, things would change. It may be good. It may be bad. Sometimes it lasts in love, but sometimes it hurts instead. Just keep your chin up." She smiled and pulled me into a tight embrace that I couldn't help but return.
You know how the time flies
Only yesterday it was the time of our lives
We were born and raised in a summer haze
Bound by surprise of our glory days
Those long months of summer made going to my parents' home dreadful, but being able to see Lily for a good three months made it all worth it. I'd always be sitting at my window just waiting to see if she was going to come over and do activities that she insisited being crossed off her summer to-do list. Sometimes we'd go to muggle London and get cones of icecream, other times we'd hang out under the old tree by the lake.
About that list, we never really got to finish it. Before the summer after our fifth year, I had inadvertently called her a mudblood. It was a stupid mistake. She cut off all connection with me, refusing to respond to my owls. It was the end of our friendship. The end of our summers and our to-do list. Sometimes I wonder if she still has that old piece of rolled up parchment. I like to think she does.
I had to turn up out of the blue uninvited
I couldn't stay away
I couldn't fight it
I had hoped you'd see my face
And that you'd be reminded
That for me it isn't over
It wasn't long before I found myself standing in back of the crowd watching Lily stand before James. I'm at their wedding ceremony uninvited, but I don't care. I love her, and I'm going to tell her. I would, but I can't.
Just look at her. She's beautiful. Her gown accentuates every detail of her body. Her eyes are glistening in the sunlight. Her smile never leaves her face. She's happy. She's happy that she's marrying James. This may be the happiest day of her life, and I may just ruin it. But I won't. I refuse to bring any unhappiness upon her on this day. I will let her be happy.
I'm about to turn away, but I spot her looking at me. She's still smiling, but this time, I see a single tear drip down her cheek. I know why it's there. It's there because of me. I smile back at her and disapparate before she can see my tears streaming down like waterfalls.
Never mind I'll find someone like you
I wish nothing but the best
For you too
Don't forget me, I begged
I remember you said
Sometimes it lasts in love
But sometimes it hurts instead
Sometimes it lasts in love
But sometimes it hurts instead
She's married to James. She doesn't know how I feel. She never will know. I wouldn't want to get in the way of her happiness. If she's happy, I can try my best to be the same. I've been doing it for quite some time now. It shouldn't be too hard.
Nothing compares
No worries or cares
Regrets and mistakes
They are memories made
Who would have known how bittersweet this would taste
I sit in my lonely, old house thinking about Lily and how she's married now. She's Mrs. James Potter. She always will be. Firewhiskey in hand, I almost fall asleep when I hear someone walk around the kitchen into the living room, dropping the glass. I open my eyes a little wider to see Lily standing in front of me.
"Severus, I -" she says before I cut her off.
"Lily."
"I just wanted to say goodbye for one last time," she said before pulling me into an embrace so tight that I need to tap her shoulder to remind her to loosen up. She's never hugged me like this before. It's a first. And the last. I hug her back before she pulls away and walks away from me, never leaving my gaze. Her eyes are flooded with tears waiting to com down. "Goodbye, Severus. You were my best friend. I love you." She waves goodbye and disapparates. I never knew that a moment like this could taste so bittersweet.
Never mind I'll find someone like you
I wish nothing but the best
For you too
Don't forget me, I begged
I remember you said
Sometimes it lasts in love
But sometimes it hurts instead
Sometimes it lasts in love
But sometimes it hurts instead
That was it. Lily was married. I was still in love with her. Life went on. I just hope that she doesn't forget me. Like she said, sometimes it lasts in love, but sometimes it hurts instead. In this case, it hurt like Hell. It's still hurting, but knowing that she's happy, that's just enough for me.