Disclaimer: I don't own Star Trek, or the song
Not really a songfic but inspired by Never Let Me Down Again by Depeche Mode
When we're on the Enterprise, everything is perfect. I have Spock and he has me. We are brothers, friends, lovers. Yet it always happens the same way. Whenever we're on shore leave some form of primal instinct awakes in me. Memories of my life before I was James T. Kirk, Captain of the USS Enterprise, come flooding back. I can't control it. I always find the bar. I strut in as usual, I know this place. I sit down at the bar next to some pretty girl. I give her a smile as I order the first round.
The first round turns into the second, then the fifth, and eventually I loose count. My brain is fuzzy with the alcohol. Before I know it I have my hands on pretty girl's thighs (I've forgotten her name, they're always the same anyway) and I'm muttering intoxicated nothings into her ear. Her lips will find mine in a drunken kiss that tastes like booze and cheap lipstick.
"Come home with me," I say, and that's the bartender's cue. He grabs the phone as pretty girl is giggling and agreeing. We don't move. We sit there groping each other drunkenly for a while until I feel another pair of hands on me. Strong hands that are pulling me away from the girl and the barstool. I look up to see its Spock. Why is Spock here? I always question, but I always know.
With a small nod to the bartender Spock rests my frame against his and walks me to the door.
"I wanna stay!" I mumble and attempt to push away from my first officer. But he is three times stronger than me when I'm sober; I'm no match for him now. Quickly and efficiently he has me out of the bar and we're on our way home. I argue and complain incoherently the whole way. Spock is silent and stoic.
After quickly undressing me, Spock lays me down in bed. I notice him hesitate for a moment, but then he leans down and softly presses his lips to my forehead. This is when my eyelids groggily close and I fall into another deep and dreamless sleep.
When I wake up the first thing I see is some pain killers and a glass of water. I take them in an attempt to sooth this raging hangover, and if I was lucky enough, the raging guilt. When I sit up I see Spock. He just stands there, beautifully Vulcan, chocolate eyes boring into me. The pain and disappointment in them is enough to break my heart. I open my mouth to apologize for what feels like the hundredth time.
Before I can get the words out, Spock silences me with a fierce and hungry kiss. This kiss is nothing like the kiss at the bar. It tastes not of alcohol, but of Spock. It is so painful and sweet and devoted I want to cry. He slowly breaks the contact of our lips to pull me into a tight embrace.
"Never let me down again," he whispers in my ear. I nod slowly as his lips find mine a second time. This kiss is bittersweet because he knows that I will let him down again. And as much as it kills me, so do I.
A/N
Yep. That's it. My first completed work of fanfiction =D And my first authors note! Thanks for taking the time to read and reviews and concrit would be very very much appreciated!
And thanks to my wifey zombiechild69 for the tips and advice. Love you!