Something hurts in your chest and absentmindedly you rub over the place where your heart beats. The rhythm slows you down periodically and it makes you slow and pause. He towers over you and gives you a worried look that means he cares and you cherish that, memorize it, and hold it close. Sometimes when he turns his back on you, your eyes follow him and you feel lonely. You feel so safe and loved when he's around but your chest aches and you wonder if it would be better if he was gone. You meet a boy with glasses and a dorky backpack with too many straps. He loves you and that's when things begin to change. "Haru-chan!" The stoic boy looks at you and the water flickers around his face. Your toes are dipped in the pool. He sighs and you barely hear it as he moves to the edge your perched on. You stare at him and he stares at you. Eventually he turns away and leans to rest on his back. You give him a sad smile. At least, if nothing else, Haru never truly changes. Slipping around the pool was bound to happen, especially when you haven't slept well in weeks. You don't even say anything as you crash forward, the world tilting at odd angles around you. Someone catches you. You look up to see green eyes and furrowed brows and his mouth is gaping and moving like he's chewing on words but can't actually get them out. "Nagisa-kun! Are you alright?" You turn to look at Rei and your world kind of shatters, somewhere deep and hidden in your mind and the fractures run and spread and your heart is broken. Makoto is holding you and you shake as you stand. You keep your head down as you run away. You're crouching in the bathroom, chewing on your thumb. You don't want to leave, instead maybe if you stay in this cold, tiled room forever you wouldn't have to bother with the clutter and heartache. Makoto finds you and you don't look at him, but you can just tell it's him. He crouches in front of you and you stare at your chewed up nail. "Nagisa?" he sounds as unsure as you feel and you squirm at the guilt that's twisting your insides. You look up. "Mako-chan." you say quietly and then you don't say anything else because your not sure what you could possibly add. Something flickers in your thoughts and it aches deep inside, like pressing against a bruise. You reach your arms up and around his neck, pulling the larger boy towards you. He loses balance and is half on you but you gently press your lips on his before he can say anything. He stills. He holds his breath for the second it takes to pull away and you let out a sigh as something unknots in your chest. It's raw and still aching but the relief you feel is so novel and refreshing that you can't help but smile even as tears gather and drop like raindrops from clouds. When you look at him his face is stunned and he looks like he's trying to work up the nerve to say something but you giggle and slip out from under. You offer him a hand, "C'mon Mako-chan! We're gonna be late!" Rei frets over you, and you drape yourself over him. Your heart feels light and broken and you wind your fingers with his and nuzzle slightly into the crook of his neck. He sighs and flushes but obediently wraps his arms around your slim torso, completing the hug. "I was worried about you." he whispers intimately, in a way that makes the butterflies in your stomach flutter in tandem with your heart. "There's nothing to worry about, Rei-chan." you respond with all honesty.