Disclaimer: I don't own anything, only my ideas( which aren't that good)

Break Up Sex

"I can't believe you two broke up"

I had just told Ron that I and Cho Chang are no longer an item. That's right I, the famous Harry Potter, the-boy-who-killed-you-know-who, Hogwarts most wanted wizard ( according to Witch Weekly, which of course I don't read, ….okay maybe this once in the common room, I mean I was bored and it was just laying there so I was like what the hell and….um…. anyways I digress) I am now Hogwarts most eligible bachelor, but you know its not like I pay attention to that kind of stuff

"Yeah, well… shit happens, you know"

"But you guys were so…… in love" Ron said very sarcastic

"Yeah I know"

"You guys were Romeo and Juliet"

"Yeah and what happen to them"

"They died"

"Exactly my point"

"Okay bad example, Rose and Jack from Titanic"

"Again, what happen to them?"

"Jack died, but not Rose, so it's different"

"Oh so I'm going to die"

Ron looked confused for a couple of minutes before finally giving up

"I mean seriously, you guys were always together, hugging, kissing, whispering stuff to each other, winking, and mate I got to tell you that …… it was extremely nauseating

I just laughed; it was good to be back with my best friends, Ron and Hermione. But wait a minute were is Hermione

"Hey, Ron where is Hermione"

"I don't know, library; maybe, you know she practically lives there"

BANG

"Speak of the Devil"

Hermione made a very un lady like entrance to the great hall. She looked rather flustered and dare I say it, mighty pissed off at someone"

"Bloody wanker" Hermione mumbled as she sat down across from them

"Who's got your knickers all in bunch Hermione" as soon as he said it Ron regretted it.

Hermione gave him her very infamous I'm-gonna-kill-you glare. Now, I'm not much of an exaggerator, but I'm not kidding you that if looks could kill, Hermione glare could've had Ron dead and buried twenty times over, faster than you could say the word quiddith. Just as I was about to order a coffin for Ron Hermione said the most shocking thing

"I'll pretend I didn't hear that" Ron eyes got all big and his mouth was wide open, I would've laughed at him if I weren't making the exact the same face.

"Um, anyways guys what's new" Hermione said trying to break the awkward silence"

"Harry broke up with Cho Chang"

"Oh, Harry I'm really sorry"

"Its okay, I really don't care, besides the break up sex was great" Hermione choked on her food

"WHAT"

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