You stare at him, looking at his emerald eyes as they scan the room, stopping at the clock. You chuckle when you see him groan and turn to you, catching you mid-stare. Heat starts to rise up your neck when you flick your eyes away from him, as casually as you are capable of. Shit, Scorpius, you think to yourself, stop thinking about Albus like that. Nothing could happen. Nothing. He looks at you oddly, clearly noticing the flush in your cheeks, then laughs and squeezes your cheek, winking at you before he goes back to his work. Well, not work. Knowing Al, he'd be doodling splotches with his quill all over his parchment. His touch lingers on your face as you turn away, hoping to hide the hopeful look in your eyes. The next hour passes quickly enough, with you casually ignoring Albus and him trying to get your attention. As soon as you leave the room, he's right in front of you. You're pinned under his hard stare as he glares at you.
"What was that all about, Scorp?"
"What do you mean?"
He rolls his eyes, still mad, but more relaxed. "I mean why were you deliberately ignoring me for the whole lesson? You know I can't stand History of Magic, and you weren't paying me any attention."
You stutter awkwardly before saying, "I was – I was just trying to do my work without being disturbed by you all the time. Honestly, Al, you don't half know how to put someone off in class."
"Like hell were you doing any work, staring out the window like that, but fine. Whatever." He walks off, not looking back and heads straight to the Great Hall.
Running after him, you tug on his sleeve, breathless and flushed but determined not to have Albus pissed at you for long. "Al, sorry. I was a dick. Just got distracted, is all."
"Oh, it's alright, I forgive you. You know I could never stay mad at you for long." He smirks suddenly, saying, "Got distracted, did you? Who've you got your eye on, because I'm pretty sure we were with Hufflepuff in there so Rose wasn't with us…" He winks at you and grabs your hand, dragging you over to the Slytherin table. You pass Rose on the way, and smile awkwardly before Albus starts speaking.
"Hiya, Rose. You know, I think you're free from Scorpy now. Seems to me like he was a bit distracted by someone else in History of Magic today."
"Oh, is that so?" She asks, the signature Rose laugh in her eyes.
You blush bright red and look at the floor. "Albus…" You mutter as you look up to see Albus giggling – God, you loved his giggle – and Rose staring curiously at you, as if she was starting to put pieces together. You grab Albus' hand and pull him over to the table, him laughing all the way. Rose was still looking at you, before she narrows her eyes, shrugs, then leaves the hall.
"Still not quite over my cousin then, mate? Gosh, your cheeks are burning." He giggles again, reaching out to stroke your cheek and you flinch. He drops his hand before turning to face his food. He starts eating and as he does, you study him. His raven black hair is starting to grow longer, curling on his neck. It sits as a heavy mess atop his head and you wanted to stroke your hands through it. Restraining yourself, you look at his face. He's quite tan, with natural rosy cheeks – unlike yours, which are a deathly pale unless you blush, which is always around Albus – and freckles over his nose and on his cheekbones. He has striking green eyes framed by long eyelashes, and quite a small nose. His lips are a light pink, and are perfectly shaped and smooth, making you want to touch your lips to them. You turn away again, and start to eat.
"You know," Albus starts through a mouthful of pie, "I can see you staring at me from the corner of my eye."
You blush an even deeper red as he turns to look at you, before chuckling and swigging his pumpkin juice.
"I – er – I'm not – studying you, I mean – what?"
His gaze fixes you to the spot as he says in a jokey tone, "It's fine, Scor. We all know how heavenly I am to look at."
"Pfft", you say, trying to hide your flush. He grins, revealing his dimples and rests his head on your shoulder for a moment before kissing your cheek. You splutter out some juice.
"Lovely, Scor."
Turning to face him, you say, "What was that for?"
"Your cheeks are so red, it's adorable." He shrugs, after leaving Scorpius stuck on his words.
Albus thinks I'm adorable. Your mind starts to wander again when a slap on the shoulder brings you back. You turn to face Albus, but see that he's looking behind you. You look and see Rose.
"I think we need to talk," She says grimly. Albus winks at you, giving you a thumbs up, before he turns to chat to someone next to him. Rose drags you out of the hall, and finds an empty classroom, taking you with her as she walks inside.
You look at her confusedly, as she sighs and turns to face you.
"Scor, I think Albus was right when he said you've moved on from me. I have to say I'm relieved, for my sake, but are you okay?"
You open your mouth to speak, but close it again, unsure of what to say.
She starts to talk again. "I mean, it's quite obvious. Lily thinks the same thing that I do. So do James and Victoire. Only Al seems to be oblivious. You should tell him."
"Tell him what?" You panic, trying to hide the fact that you know exactly what she means.
"It's obvious. Being gay is fine, Scor. And it's also fine that you like Al. He'll accept you, of course. And James seems to think he might not be straight, well, we all saw him kiss your cheek just then. Go on, Scor, tell him. For me?"
"Um… I don't know – what you're talking about. I don't – I don't like Albus, Rose!" You say quickly, panic building up in your chest. "I'm not gay, for fuck's sake!" You shake your head and start to run out into the corridor, but Rose grabs your robes to stop you.
She rolls her eyes, then sighs, looking at you. Was that… pity in her eyes? "Scor… it's obvious that you love Al, I'm sure you have done for a while now, and, well. Some people reckon he loves you too, whether he knows it yet or not. If you aren't going to tell him, at least admit to me that I'm right."
You look at her determined face. You sigh. "Fine. Yeah… I think I do lo-like Albus. Don't tell him, Rose, though. You can't."
She nods her head and walks out. You follow her and find Albus waiting outside. He looks slightly flushed, but whether her heard anything you don't get to find out, as he just grabs your hand and walks with you to the Slytherin Common.
"So… what was that all about, then? With Rose?" He looks at you, avoiding your eyes before looking down at the floor. You swear you saw his eyes gaze over your lips for a fraction of a second, but tell yourself you imagined it.
"Oh, nothing. She just wanted to – er – see my Charms essay." You hurry out a pathetic excuse before getting out your work. You glance over to your side to see Albus leaning against the sofa with his hands clasped behind his head. He's looking up at the ceiling with a nonchalant but thoughtful look on his face. His eyes are sadder than the usual bright, sparkling jewels you see, but he looks almost content. There are so many contradictions on Albus' face that you give up trying to imagine what this beautiful and ridiculous boy was thinking.
"Al... Are you okay?" You speak with a slightly scared voice, your hands shaking in anticipation.
"Yeah. I'm just thinking some things through." Albus looks over at you and gives you a smile that doesn't quite reach his eyes, then eyes you with a look that makes you utterly curious as to what it means. He yawns. "I'm gonna head up to bed. See you tomorrow, Scorpius." You reach out and hug him goodnight, feeling him tense up slightly before relaxing into it. Albus gets up and walks away and as he does, you swear you see a flush make its way up Albus' neck...
When you wake up the next morning, you realise three things. The first is that you are still leaning on the sofa in the common room. The second is that you are still in your robes from yesterday. The third is that Albus is lying on the sofa and looking at you amusedly. You blush slightly before yawning and leaning your head back again.
"I can't believe you were out here all night. Thinking about the mysterious person from History of Magic yesterday, were you?"
"Er - no. I was just tired, I guess. How come you went up so early?"
"No specific reason. I just, um. Heard something yesterday I deemed interesting and wanted to think it through."
You gasp soundlessly and your eyes widen. Keeping your gaze on the floor, you say quietly, almost breathlessly, "What did you hear?"
"Something about, um. Well, I heard that someone might like me. I dunno for sure, or anything, but I know who and yeah, I was just thinking about it, really." You start to panic. Albus knows. He heard you yesterday and he knows. Albus fucking Potter knows that you are in love with him. Rose, you fucking idiot. No. Scorpius, you idiot.
You look over and see that Albus is sitting beside you, his eyes fixed on the wall in front of him, his body tensed up, and his eyes wide. He looks at you, sadness and affection in his eyes.
"Look, I think I know what you heard yesterday. I - I should have told you before that I was gay and that I like you and I understand that - that now you won't want to be friends with me," Tears are streaming down your face and Albus is looking at you with his mouth slightly open. "I can't help liking you and I know you don't feel that way about me and I know you aren't gay and I know we can't be friends after this and I just regret everything so much, so fucking much!" You put your head in your hands and grasp your hair hard enough for it to hurt, but not causing as much pain as it did for you to talk that to the person you love most.
You feel Albus' soft hands gently take your hands out of your hair, and feel the weight of them as they start to caress your head. You start shaking violently as you cry. Albus puts his arm around you and pushes your head up. You see the tears in his eyes too, clinging on to his long eyelashes as his face moves closer towards yours. You gasp, loudly this time, as his lips touch yours. You pull away and stare at him.
"Shhh," he says, placing a finger on your mouth. "I love you, Scor."
You kiss again, his arms on your waist as he pushes you down onto the floor...
You wake with a start. Did that happen? Did that really happen? You look around, seeing that you are indeed in the common room wearing yesterday's robes, but Albus isn't with you. You must have dreamed all of that, but bloody hell, it felt so real. And amazing. This was not the first dream you had had about Albus, but it was perhaps the most innocent. Your mind sometimes wandered to certain other places in your dreams. You blush again, thinking about last night's dream and walk up to your dorm. Albus lies on his bed, and you resist the urge to walk up to him and place a kiss on his beautiful lips. You change quickly into your pyjamas, wanting to show that you had gone up last night. You get into your bed, realising that it's a Saturday, and so you can probably get away with a few more hours of sleep. Albus won't be up until at least midday, anyhow. You close your eyes and fall into a dreamless sleep.
You wake up when you hear the rustling of sheets in the bed next to yours. You sit up and look over to see Albus, flustered, moving around. When he looks at you his eyes widen and he flushes, swearing under his breath as he moves his sheets into a bundle. You glance down at the sheets and realise what he's so flustered about. You see a tent in his pyjamas and notice him covering them up, his cheeks a brighter red than you've ever seen them.
You giggle at him and he swats you with his pillow. "Hey, Al. There's no need to get so... Um. Weird about it. Morning wood is normal, you know." Having said this, you flush quickly, wondering why Albus was so quick to hide it, he usually didn't care. Screw that, he never cared.
"Shut the fuck up. I might have had some kind of... Dream." He says all this without once looking at you, and a part of you wishes his dream was about you. A bit more explicit than yours, seemingly. He gets up and says, stuttering, "Well - I - I guess I have to - er - go and - um - shower. Yeah, bye." Not looking at you once, Albus hurries out of the dorm, clutching a towel in front of his crotch. Not that anything could hide that, you think, smirking to yourself. You get up and make your way to he showers, seeing that it's already ten and you don't want to miss the last of breakfast. When you get to the shower, you hear the familiar sounds of someone jerking off and seeing that there is only one occupied stall, you realise that it must be Albus.
You hear a soft moan followed by a barely audible half moan, half whisper of "Scorpius..."
Oh my god.
Oh my fucking God.
Albus fucking Potter is jerking off to thoughts of you in the shower.
Before you're heard, you tiptoe out of the showers, and sprint out of the common rooms, making your way down to the Great Hall. You rush over to the Gryffindor table and try and find Rose, but only see Lily.
"Lily! Have you seen Rose? I, well, I need to talk to her about something." Guessing that Rose has already told her about your conversation in that empty classroom, you make urgent eyes at Lily and you see her understanding.
"What happened, Scor?"
Not comfortable discussing her older brother jerking off to you in the shower with Lily (a mere 14-year-old), you ask again where Rose is. Rolling her eyes, Lily says that Rose is in the library. Thanking her, you rush out, almost bumping into a blushing Albus as he stutters an apology. You mutter something about helping Rose with her potions homework, and then run to the library.
You see her in the astronomy section, and then drag her to an empty classroom, being sure to use a silencing charm on it and lock the door.
"What is it, Scor? Did you tell him?"
"Not exactly. Well, I think heard us yesterday. He was being really quiet and weird last night, and then he went to bed early, saying he had to think things through. I had a dream that I told him and he kissed me. In the dream, I mean. And well, I have this feeling that Al might have had a similar dream. I woke up in the common room and when I went up I went back to sleep and, um. Well, when I woke up he was trying to hide something but I saw it before he could. He said he had a dream last night and he had an erection, Rose!"
She wrinkles her nose before motioning for you to go on.
"He said he was going to shower, and I also needed one and didn't want to miss breakfast, so I went there and he was the only one in there and, well. I heard him jerking off. Rose, I think it was to me. He... Well, he - he sort of moaned my name."
Rose looks at you with her eyes wide open. "What did you do next?"
"I just ran for it. I bumped into him on the way to find you, and he was so red. What should I do?" You plead for advice.
"Talk to him. It's the only way, Scor." She gives you an apologetic look before getting rid of the silencing charm, unlocking the door and going outside. You walk out of the classroom, and before you know where you're going you make your way towards the astronomy tower. You sit there for hours, thinking things over im your head. Wishing never to see Albus again. Wishing he was here right now. Wishing he would kiss you. You shake those thoughts away and sigh.
You jolt as you hear footsteps and know in an instant that they're Albus'. "Hey."
You blush and reply. "Hi."
He comes to sit beside you and it reminds you of last night's dream. Only this feels real. Much more real.
"Scor, I think you heard something this morning and I need to talk to you about it."
"I need to talk to you too. About something I think you heard yesterday. Between me and Rose."
You look up and he looks so nervous while he bites his lip before saying with a shy smirk, "Do we have to talk?"
You put a hand on his cheek, caressing his soft skin softly and bring his face towards yours. He closes his eyes and puts a hand on your neck, bring you even closer. You're millimetres away from him now, closer than you've ever been before to this beautiful boy's lips. As your lips meet, you realise it's so much more perfect than anything you've experienced in your secret dreams.
"I had a dream about you last night." Albus says after the kiss.
"What happened?" You smirk before kissing his neck as he talks. You're surprise about how normal all this feels.
"Well. You kissed me and then..." He smirks. "I put my hand on your hips like this," Albus whispers right into your ear as he moves his hands down your chest onto your hips. You sigh against his skin and pull him closer. He kisses you, stronger this time, and moves his hands through your hair: fingers urgent; lips desperate; and a certain other part of his body very passionate. You wrap your arms around him, pulling him so close to your body that you seem to become one person.
You slowly and reluctantly break apart, both grinning with relief and exhilaration, and kiss softly again. Grabbing Albus' hand, you pull him down the stairs and into the Slytherin common room, through the corridor and up to your dorm. You have it to yourselves so you push him down onto his bed, kissing his neck and touching his chest as you say, in a voice that has become somewhat deeper and huskier, "What happened next in his dream of yours?"
