Title: Train Wreck
Rating: T for language
Summary: Until then, he could only continue on towards his own inevitable train wreck. His lies and truths on the same track.
Warnings: none
Disclaimer: I own nothing and no harm is meant.
Beta: None, all mistakes are mine.
A/N: Wrote this like a month or so ago when I first started writing. I guess I just kind of forgot about it, lol.
Fresh tears tracked down Cody's cheeks as he drove through the night.
It was pitch black without a star nor the moon in sight, his only source of light being his headlights while he only companion was the radio which played static for the most part.
Every few miles or so he would pick up bits and pieces of songs but nothing that made any sense or that would allow him to identify the song, not that he'd want to, though.
The purpose of this drive was not to think but to try and clear his head before he completely lost his mind.
The upcoming show was being held in the next town over so he decided to go ahead and drive there as soon as RAW ended that night. Alone.
That seemed to be a recurring theme in his life now a days.
Oh don't get me wrong, he had plenty of people ready and willing to keep him company through the night. He was the locker room resident siren, plush lips made for kissing and sucking, hips cut just right, thighs destined to be wrapped around a thick waist and clear blue eyes that could weaken even a strong man's resolve.
What seemed to be the problem, then?
After each and every encounter, his new lover would carefully extract himself from Cody's arms, dress and leave without so much as a goodbye or thank you for that matter. Leaving him to curl up in a ball and cry himself to sleep, sexually satisfied but emotionally distraught.
It was the way things ran behind the scenes. Unless of course you found a steady partner, whether out of a mutual agreement or a little something more.
It was that something more that Cody longed for.
He sniffled and wiped his nose with his sleeve while he tried to reign in his emotions. The radio was back to static so he turned it off as the only car he'd seen since he started on this lonely stretch of road passed him by. Middle of bum fuck nowhere seemed to be his current location.
He just hoped he didn't break down. Being stranded with no one to call, or at least no one willing to come get him this late and having to spend the night in his truck on the side of the road wasn't exactly on his to do list.
Cody continued to drive taking an exit and making a few more turns before he finally pulled into the hotel parking lot. He got out, grabbed his bags and made his way across the mostly empty lot. By the looks of things he would have the hotel basically to himself for a few days before the rest of the guys arrived.
After receiving his key from the lady at the front desk, he made his way up to his room where he hoped to be able to get a good nights rest.
Easier said then done, though, since his mind was once again back to analyzing his predicament.
The worst part of it all, he thought as he undressed and climbed into bed, forgoing a shower because he was completely exhausted.
The worst part was that his two best friends seemed to be completely clueless to his pain.
Ted was too wrapped up in his own relationship with that high-flyer Evan Bourne, though he doubted it was more than just sex. At least on Evan's part since Cody had seen him and the dark Hardy exiting a few private rooms on more than one occasion.
As for Randy, well Cody was actually kind of glad he didn't seem to notice.
You see, when it all came down to it, Randy was the root of the problem.
He sighed heavily as he thought of Randy and what could never be for the up-tenth time that night.
Cody was terminally in love with the man, yes terminally. Simple hero worship had morphed into a small crush which then blossomed into something much more dangerous. A little something called love. Full blown, unrequited love if you wanted to whole story.
It was a love that eventually caused Cody to cut himself off from others. Excusing himself from nights out because he was too tired or already had plans, when in all reality he was holed up with his comics and video games or out looking for a new nightly companion. Even now was a perfect example of the shame he lived with. Here he was, already in the new town when the show didn't take place for a whole freaking week. Instead of hanging out, getting drunk with the guys, he was alone. Again.
But he wasn't sure how much longer he could stand being around Randy and not being with him. It had even gotten to the point where it physically hurt every time he saw Randy and John together, no matter what they were doing. Talking, working out, eating, kissing, even them just being in each others presence broke off another little piece from his heart. It was all too much and he was starting to wonder if Randy's friendship was worth the heartache.
The tears returned as he buried himself under the covers and willed his mind to shut down. He was fucking exhausted but he just couldn't go to sleep.
His phone starting buzzing around on the side table signaling that he had an incoming call. He let it go to voice mail since he didn't feel like making small talk tonight. It continued for several more seconds before it stopped briefly then started up again. Buzzing itself right of the table where he left it.
He threw the covers off some time later when it became to warm and turned over onto his back staring with puffy red rimmed eyes up at the ceiling. The calls had stopped but a loud beeping told him he had a few voice messages waiting to be checked.
Hiding, he knew was the coward's way out but the alternative was to tell Randy and John how he felt.
Cody cracked a small smile as he entertained the outcome. In his wildest dreams he was invited into a threesome, two incredible older lovers to love and take care of him. Show him a thing or two about life.
However, the nightmares were what kept his mouth closed.
It wasn't like he stood a chance in comparison against Cena or had much in the way to offer Randy. He was a kid and Randy probably wanted a man in his bed.
He sighed and closed his eyes. Eventually the shit would hit the fan and his secret wouldn't be his own anymore.
Until then, he could only continue on towards his own inevitable train wreck. His lies and truths on the same track.