ok, so i read a one shot by "dare to breathe" and was inspired to write this (n my sidekick at 2 in the morning, of course!)

I've seen this pairing and shunned it because i'm a "edward & bella or i'll punch you in the face!" kind of girl...but its always healthy to open ur mind and expand so...

here it is...

damn u Stephenie for dreaming this up before i could!!

I stared at the floor length mirror, studying its pale reflection. The word beautiful failed to encompass all that was she. The smooth, alabaster skin shimmered like sunshine as waves of deep, blond hair cascaded around her delicate face. She did not try to be sexy; the soft pout to her mouth and slight droop of her honey-colored, bedroom eyes did this without effort.

She was tall, with a lean yet curvy frame. The deep purple sundress she wore was striking against her white skin. My eyes slid over the swell of her breast; admired the way the wispy fabric seemed to hug her waist and swell softly at the hip, conforming to the perfect curvature of her body. I lifted my eyes to meet hers. The sadness in them mirrored my own. Like me, they seemed to wonder how this beauty had not been able to hold him the way it had so many others. Of course we knew it wasn't just about beauty, he wasn't that shallow. But still, it was worse to think that even with everything else we had to offer, outside of the physical, it had not been enough.

I looked away, ashamed of the sadness I had allowed to wash over me. The supple fabric of the sundress floated behind me as I made my way to the large, bay window of my room. The picturesque beauty of Denali would have left me breathless, if I'd had any. The sun was high in the pale blue skies, illuminating the deep green forest and rolling hills below.

I smiled to myself, amazed at how insignificant my issues seemed in the face of such beauty. Before I could blink, I was outside; my long limbs sprawled out in the cool, green grass. I fanned my hair out above me and closed my eyes, giggling to myself as I imagined what my sparkling body looked like to the birds I could hear, soaring gracefully above.

"Exquisite." A painfully melodic voice whispered.

I was on my feet before I could think, staring at the most beautiful creature I would ever see. I knew if my heart could beat, its pace would have doubled. He was standing there, smiling that gorgeous, crooked smile. Even for a vampire, his beauty was mesmerizing.

"Ok, ok, enough with the flattery." He joked, waving his hands dismissively.

"Hello, Edward. What brings you here?"

He can't be here to see me.

"Actually, I am." He murmured, as he quickly took a seat by my feet. I stared down at him as he lowered his back into the grass and placed his arms behind his head.

"Join me." he called. I had not choice but to comply. His voice seemed to control the inner workings of my body; like the strings of a puppet master. I sank sinuously to the ground beside him, confused but happy to be sharing this moment.

"You do have a choice, you know." He mused.

"Huh?"

"Nothing…so, how are you?"

I hated when he asked questions he already knew the answers to.

"If I knew the answer I wouldn't be asking." He chuckled lightly.

"So you've lost your gift then, have you?"

"No, its works as well as it always has." I heard the smile in his voice.

"Then you won't mind if I don't bother to answer that ridiculous question." I snapped, turning my head away from him. I swear, sometimes it felt like he got off on torturing me. As if reading my most intimate thoughts wasn't enough, he had to hear me say them. Instantly, he was lying in front of me, his glorious face propped up on his elbow.

"Tanya, please forgive me. I never meant to torture you. It's just that, there are times when your thoughts are not quite clear. Sometimes they all run together and it's hard for me to single them out." He explained, pushing a strand of my hair away from my face with his long fingers. His touch sent a warm vibration throughout my body.

"Sorry." He mumbled, swiftly pulling his hand away.

"Its fine, Edward. You can't help it. I'm sorry for what I said, err, thought. I know your not trying to hurt me."

"Well, I will admit there are some things I hear but would rather you spoke them aloud." He smiled sheepishly. "It's easier to feel the tenor of your emotions if I hear you voice them."

"What are you doing here, Edward?" I sighed heavily. He did not answer. Instead, he rolled onto his back and stared up into the sky. It was beginning to seem like he wasn't going to respond, so I too rolled to my back, fanning my hair out once again. My eyes flickered to his face as a small growl escaped his throat.

"I've…I've been…well…"

"Just spit it out, Edward."

"Well…the truth is, I've…missed you." He breathed, almost too low for me to hear, and that was low. For the first time in a while, I wished I had a beating heart. I longed to feel my pulse accelerate rapidly at his words. Quickly, I beat down the hope that sought to rise within me. I refused to be disappointed they way I had been so many times before.

"Tanya…please." Edward pleaded, sorrow in his beautiful voice.

"Sorry." I whispered.

"No, it's…I'm sorry. You know I…"

"Yes, I know, Edward, but do you really think that makes it hurt any less?" I was getting angry now as I quickly rose to my feet and stalked towards the lush forest. His steps barely made a sound as he followed me. Who did he think he was to keep doing this to me? He couldn't say he didn't know how I felt, or know what seeing him and being with him did to me. Any fool with sight, especially a fool with that of a vampire's could see that I was…in love with him. I trudged along, refusing to turn when his silent footsteps came to a halt.

"Tanya, I had no idea." He breathed, appearing before me as I reached the shade of a giant spruce.

"Ha! Save it Edward." I laughed, un-amused. I really wasn't in the mood for this. I turned swiftly and headed back the way I had come.

"Tanya, listen to me; look at me!" He commanded, once again standing in front of me. His warm hands, warm because our temperatures were the same, rested lightly against either sides of my face. I gasped at his touch as I stared into his eyes.

"I truly did not know your feelings were this…deep. Yes, I knew that they were strong, but usually they were coupled with thoughts of other men you've…had, and well, naturally I assumed your feelings were merely of a…physical nature."

Thought it pained me to do so, I removed his hands from my face and walked around him. At a human pace, I returned to my place in the grass. He hesitated for a moment, and then walked just as slowly as I had and joined me. I was quiet for a while, mulling over some things in my head; deciding whether or not to let my guard down and come clean.

"Please, Tanya."

I looked over into his piercing, butterscotch eyes and knew I had no choice.

"Yes, there is always a choice."

"No, not with you, Edward." I took a deep breath.

"The reason you saw things that way in my mind is because that's what I wanted you to see. I didn't want you to hear the true extent of my feelings for you." I began, staring at two ants in the grass; one following the other every where it went.

"I did this because, if you rejected me…when you rejected me, it wouldn't hurt as bad. I could live with it if you merely thought it to be a "crush", but if you had known the true depth of what I felt, and still chose…well, its no matter now, your choice is made. At least I have some of my dignity left."

I sighed, twisting a blade of grass between my cold fingers. I tossed it in the air and watched as the wind carried it about the yard. I couldn't bring myself to look at him. I didn't' want the pity I knew would be brimming in his eyes.

"Look at me, Tanya." I could not disobey the authority in his voice. I lifted my eyes reluctantly to his. There was no pity there, simply a bright curiosity.

"What?"

"Show me." he breathed.

"Show you what, Edward?" I loved the way his name rolled off my lips; tinged with the faintest of Russian accents, almost lost to me now. His mouth pulled up into a wry smile.

"I like it as well."

"What do you want me to show you, Edward?" I rolled my eyes, but smiled.

"Show me, or tell me, if you prefer, how you truly feel." His voice was pleading, as if there was some underlying reason to his curiosity.

"You know me to well." He mused. He was right about that. I knew him well enough to know that bearing my soul would not give him what he wanted.

"Tanya!" My eyes raced to his, alarmed by the pain in his voice.

"Please." His eyes smoldered under the dark lashes, melting my resolve.

I knew then, that there was no turning back. The flood gates were opening and I knew that from this point on, our relationship would never be the same.

okiday! i hope u liked it! please please R&R. This is supposed to be a one-shot, but depending on how u guys feel about it, i may try and expand it...there has 2 be enough ppl want to read it though, lol...

and don't ask me where i'm going with it, cuz honestly, i have no idea...lol

peace&positiveEnergy