Written for Megyal for the 2016 Winter Fest.


Strange Protocol

"I'm so thirsty right now."

"Oh, I have a water for you and I have a dick." Iruka pursed his lips. "I didn't know if you meant like you're thirsty for water or if you wanted dick so…"

"I'll just stick with the water." They were staring at each other intensely as a muscular arm slid a water bottle across the table at Kakashi. Kakashi felt the creeping sense of uneasy attraction to the face he knew but had forgotten at the same time and he quickly looked away. He decided he was going to try to ignore the young man who had been playing with his strings, flexing tan and smooth arm and smirking with a devious but boyish smile.

"Whatever you want. I mean, need." Kakashi snuck a peek to see Iruka's brows wiggle with that smug grin and he almost burst out into nervous laughter, quickly looking away again and motioning to Iruka for the bill.

"Don't offer if you're not going to give."

Iruka quirked his brow at the response and pouted as that lustrous arm handed him the folding presenter, "then what's the point of teasing?"

First hesitating in his movements to bring out his wallet, Kakashi shrugged and stood while leaving his money and standing.

That sly smirk came back when he glanced over his shoulder to Iruka again and he flinched. "What?"

"Have you ever been teased before by someone my age?" Sliding hands behind his head, Iruka's arms flashed muscle as his work shirt rode up just enough to give Kakashi a flash of smooth back. Time seemed to freeze when Kakashi's eyes caught on the sight of what looked like a dot of birthmark and when Iruka turned, he was met with a trail of dark hair leading to a bellybutton. He couldn't help but blush and look away when he sensed Iruka's grin stretching out even further.

"Yes, I have." He answered distantly with his eyes glued to the storefront and his from of exit. What he didn't mention was that the teasing hadn't been the fun kind. "And that's not your age."

He shook his head and glanced back to Iruka's smoldering eyes before looking away again. "So is there a timeline to any of this? Has Tsunade said anything about when you'll be able to… Get back to normal?"

With a shrug, Iruka slid his hands down from behind his head and into the pocket of his loose pants. A hand went up to absentmindedly rub his nose. "I don't think I'm that much of a priority but protocol asks for complete secrecy before the ceremony. I'd like to be able to take some pictures with Naruto on his big day."

"I think Naruto might be okay with it." Kakashi supplied.

"It wouldn't feel right. I'm his teacher… Well, was. I'll look like one of Konohamaru's friends." Iruka looked up when Kakashi took a step forward, his eyes having to travel more than usual.

"We'll get this sorted out." Kakashi reassured despite the fading pink in his cheeks and Iruka couldn't help but smile softly. "If you want, I want always pull some strings and see if we can get more guards on duty."

The softly smile turned sly and Kakashi watched as the briefly soft face of teenaged Iruka turned into a sulty smirk, pulling rosy lips over full cheeks. "Are you just saying that because you want to use your Hokage powers one last time?"

The response made him chuckle and he couldn't help but stare at the odd figure standing in front of him. How this Iruka was way too strong and the goatee felt strange when he compared this Iruka to the image of a seventeen year old Iruka in his mind.

"This henge is strange." For the first time since he walked in, Iruka's cheeks burned red and he froze when he realized they were in public and Iruka was supposed to be hiding, stammering, "I mean, you look… older since I last saw you. More hair than usual right?"

"I have no idea what you mean, Hokage-sama." Iruka was staring at him intently as Kakashi realized he was winding the situation further. He stopped and nodded quickly, letting his face go lax.

"See you soon," he was quick to walk out with his normal slouch, hoping that Iruka wouldn't mind that he dropped in that night when the diner open and empty.

This henged version of Iruka was too interesting to forget even as he went through extensive meetings and assisted with all of Naruto's fittings, there as always that sexy smile at the back of his mind. It wasn't off putting but it certainly didn't feel natural' almost ethereal as if straight from Icha Icha Paradise.

Now that he thought of it, new-Iruka would fit inside that world perfectly as a new love interest that could sweep in and steal the show.

"Sensei," Naruto jogged him out of his thoughts and he hummed a response, looking to his pupil. He was fidgeting in his seat and looking worse for wear after having spent all day indoors and probably bored out of his mind. "All these meetings and talks are starting to get…"

"Redundant?" Kakashi watched the young man nod.

"Yeah, that's right. Recumbent." Standing with newfound enthusiasm, Naruto grinned at an astonished Kakashi. "Let's go eat!

"Naruto, we still have to approve the banner designs." He supplicated but it was too late; food was on the brain.

"Come on, sensei!" Already halfway out the with a flourish of cloak, Naruto grinned back at the old man. "Let's eat!"

"Let me guess: my treat." Naruto huffed at the statement as they made their way out of the building.

"How nice of you to offer, Kakashi-sensei."

"Ah, is that Iruka-sensei?" Kakashi had to nudge the eager Naruto back into a hushed state but stopped short when his eyes hit the figure Naruto was speaking about.

This was not the new-Iruka he had met earlier that day. It was the old Iruka; not the normal one he had grown up with but the one he had first fell in love with twenty-five years ago. He shivered hard at the gangly, baby-faced teen that he made eye contact with and his heart fluttered. Hair pinned back in a loose pony-tail, Kakashi was looking the teen he remembered going with on many dates that he remembered started off as awkward but became calming and needed.

"Yes," he replied faintly as they were approached by the sweet-faced waiter who gave them a warm smile.

There was little time to understand what was going on then Iruka asked, "table for two?"

"At the bar, this old man needs a drink," was the response from Naruto that Kakashi heard from far away with a hand slapped on his back and they were led to two stools at a corner of the bar that centered the restaurant. After sitting down, Kakashi could only see clear, bright brown eyes and ordered on auto-pilot. The world had fallen away and he finally snapped back when Iruka walked away but his gut was still clenched and his heart was still burning.

"Iruka-sensei looks so young." Naruto mused as he sipped his water. "Is that how he looked when he was a teenager?"

"Yeah," was the wistful reply and Naruto looked over to his mentor thoughtfully.

"Seems a little bit too Fabio." He muttered, wondering how the buff, sleazy Iruka he was looking at could grow into his warm, lovable sensei who brought him to eat ramen at Ichiraku. He noticed how even as he spoke to Kakashi the other man was far off in la la land, giving half-assed responses and sometimes

"Here you go," Iruka set their drinks down in front of them. Naruto turned his body on his stool to look at Iruka thoroughly, frowning.

Hand on his hip, Iruka stared back and slyly asked, "what can I get you?"

Naruto rudely huffed, "what is that nasty fuzz on your face?"

"Hah, at least I have fuzz, old man." The young Iruka quipped immediately and Kakashi blinked back to reality as he realized that Naruto was seeing the version of Iruka he had seen that morning and not the real seventeen year-old Iruka.

Confused, he stared the henge down discreetly as the two bickered and silently wished he still had the Sharingan to decipher what was going on.

"I think you sat too long in the bath, looks like you shrunk." Naruto ground his teeth and growled, unable to respond. Iruka shot him a grin and Naruto's shoulders fell a bit.

"So, will you be able to attend?"

"Attend what?" With a brow raised, Iruka looked thoroughly taken aback.

Naruto stammered, trying to find the words to say but grasping at straws. "My… My… It's the…"

"The ceremony," Kakashi supplied, feeling the a sneaking suspicion crawl up the back of his spine. Studying Iruka carefully, he motioned from himself to Naruto as he spoke, "the passing of the torch from one Hokage to another."

The reaction he got was one he expected but was still surprised at.

"Pfffff," Iruka was chuckling to himself. Noticing the grave face on both Kakashi and Naruto's face he quickly switched to a cough and readjusted himself, cheeks flaring up as he politely added, "that's wonderful. I'm sure everything will go smoothly."

"You didn't answer my question," Naruto said.

It was suddenly very quiet between the three of them as Iruka tried to process what was going on. People bustled passed them and Kakashi supplied to help free the tension, "of course he'll go; it's a big day for everyone. Not everyday the great Naruto becomes Hokage"

"Y… Yeah," Iruka was looking at him now, eyes shining thankfully and Kakashi had to take a deep breath and look away. He saw Naruto nod; still confused but appeased for the moment.

"Go on and give him your order, Naruto. You're holding him up." Kakashi nudged and Naruto jerked back to his menu and they both order, a confused Iruka bringing their order to the kitchen. It was quiet between the two before Naruto stood and left for the bathroom.

With a sigh, Kakashi rubbed a temple. He jolted up at the touch of a hand to his shoulder. The young Iruka stood behind his stool and he turned aboutface. "You're so sly."

No longer there was the sweet smile he had seen before and instead was a cheeky grin and glittering eyes that were mesmerizing. "Was I that transparent?"

"No, you almost fooled me too. I was already trying to figure out how to keep you from finding out the Third was gone." Iruka softened and put his hand on Kakashi's shoulder again, smoothing his thumb in a circle in his navy shirt.

"You weren't going to try and convince me that we were married?" A wink flew Kakashi's way and he flushed automatically under his mask, shifting uncomfortably in his seat.

The rest of the dinner was filled with a stressed out Naruto whispering tensely to him and Kakashi even dropped hints that maybe it was a double for Iruka and that the real was in hiding. His favourite tall tale was the one that Iruka had been kidnapped and this was a spy to infiltrate the leaf.

One would think that this was a great supper and that Kakashi was having a quiet ball at jerking Naruto around but Iruka had other plans. He was saying in a low tone to Naruto, "you know, we've never really had close relations with the mist."

"Enjoy your meal, Hokage-sama?" Was spoken softly against his ear and he visibly shivered, Naruto tensing in preparation to strike. He tried to hide how flustered he was at the blatant flirting.

"Yes, very much," his voice cracked and Naruto was out of his seat, hand on his pocket.

"Good, is there anything else I can get you?"

"I think Naruto is ready to pay for himself this time." Burning at the cheek, Naruto untensed to pull his wallet out of his pocket instead of the shuriken that were probably hidden in there too and hesitantly paid alongside his mentor.

They were on their way out with Naruto in the front and Iruka bringing up the rear when Naruto blurted out, "I think I need to talk to Iruka-sensei for a bit, Kakashi-sensei."

Pretending to be surprised, Kakashi shrugged, "okay."

As he followed Naruto out the door, Iruka grinned at Kakashi one last time. It was a few minutes before a red faced Naruto threw open the door and cried inside to even the patrons of the diner's surprise, "you owe me big-time, Kaka-sensei!"

With a grand whisk, he left the diner and a few patrons began to snicker at the realization of who the entertaining guest was. Stepping out after that abrupt exit, Kakashi came to stand by Iruka who was watching an angry Naruto hop from the nearest rooftop to another. Hands sliding into his pockets, Kakashi watched him go before his eyes drifted to the starry sky. Looking over at the teen next to him, he caught Iruka staring back with curious eyes and wondered how he didn't feel Iruka's eyes on him.

"You have really amazing eyes," the compliment caught Kakashi off guard and he froze, not knowing what to say back suddenly but Iruka continued, "I can barely remember what you looked like with the Sharingan."

"I don't remember you ever having to see it. I usually only used it in battle." He mused, looking away and scratching the back of his head.

With a snap of his fingers, Iruka pointed at him with the darkest of looks, "I've been in battle with you; it was one of the most horrible moments of my life."

"Ahn, yeah, I remember," their eyes didn't look away from each other for what felt like the longest minute before Iruka broke back into a devious grin.

"Hokage-sama,"

"Kakashi," he corrected before he went into shock when the young methodically pressed up against him and slid hands under his shirt.

"Ahn, Kakashi-san," Iruka articulated slowly, emphasizing every syllable of his name and Kakashi shivered hard. "I'm having a little trouble with my ninjutsu. Do you think you could help me?"

Kakashi was trying so hard not to grope back at the teenager grinding on him, glancing around with the worry that someone would see. Brought back by the hands on his chest moving lower, he held back a whine and slid a hand into the back of Iruka's hair for a moment as Iruka whispered huskily, "why don't you take me back to your office and teach me there, Hokage-sama?"

Feeling his blood rush to his cheeks and pants, Kakashi mumbled, "only a bit of ninjutsu; you're already amazing at genjutsu and henges. Although, I do prefer training with someone my age."

With that sexy smirk, Iruka slid their hands together and pulled Kakashi in the direction of the academy. Blinking back the haze of lust, Kakashi had a brief moment of reality and asked, "wait, don't you have to work?"

"I finished over two hours ago," Iruka smirked at the surprised face Kakashi made and said offhandedly, "did you know it takes sloths 42 hours to have sex?"

Eyes wide at what could have been a random statement of a hinting promise, Kakashi's voice cracked as he was tugged through Konoha, "what?"

Iruka grinned back at him with a promising smile and sharp eyes, "are you still thirsty?"


Hope you liked it!