Disclaimer: I do not own The Hunger Games or the cover photo used in this story
It is an unbelievably boring morning today and I find that I don't what to do for the rest of the day. Boredom is a new feeling for me. I've never been bored before because I was always doing something. It was either taking care of Prim, hunting, trading, or starving.
I look outside the window while I sit on the sofa with my feet tucked under me. Outside I can see melted snow everywhere. The winter has just ended – the victory tour ended three weeks ago – and springs is starting. There's still patches of snow everywhere though; on trees, on the streets, on the roofs of the other empty victor houses. Well, hunting is definitely not an option today, knowing the forest floors are wet and slippery.
No one is in my oversized house right now because mother is picking up Prim from school. This is the first day of the school, since winter. I don't have to go to school anymore. Since being a victor, I haven't been able to do a lot of things. I sigh, not knowing what to do.
My mind wanders. Peeta doesn't have to go to school either, so he's always in his house, baking. He's usually alone in there, like I am right now. His family didn't move in with him because they wanted to stay in the bakery and keep an eye on things. They still visit him though, and he does the same to them.
He visits me sometimes too. He brings bread to Haymitch and I. Sometimes he stays longer here though. Prim likes him. She told me he was nice and caring. She told me she was like Gale to her, like her older brother.
I look out at the window again, not knowing what to do. I wonder when Prim and mother is going to get back. She left a few minutes ago. I think they're going to take a while since the Victors village is even farther from the school than the Seam already was. I should've gone with her.
I sigh, then, I hear a faint knock on the door. I rise from the sofa and slowly walk to the door. It can't be my mom and Prim. It's certainly not Haymitch, seeing as when we checked up on him last night, he was passed out on his dirty rug in his living room. It can be Gale, but he has a louder knock than this one.
I open the door slowly. Standing in front of me with a black jacket on is Peeta, holding a small tray with a cover on it in front of him. He gives me a small smile when I open the door.
"I brought cheese buns." He tells me
I open the door wider for him to enter. I take the tray from him as he removes his jacket and hangs it by the door. I wait for him and head to the kitchen. I set the tray down on the counter and open the lid. The cheese buns are still slightly smoking.
"They're fresh out of the oven. I thought you might like something warm since it's still cold." He tells me.
I give him a small smile "Thank you." I take one in my hand and look at it intently. It warms my hand.
"I'm sorry for just dropping in. I should've told you earlier. Did I interrupt you from something?" he asks
I take a bite from the bread. My teeth sink into the warm delicacy smoothly. I rip the piece from the bun with my teeth and chew, the warm cheese taste sweet in my mouth. After I swallow, I look at him and shake my head.
"Not really." I tell him "I was starting to get bored. I've never been bored before."
"Oh." He replies "Where's Prim and your mom?" he asks
"She picked up Prim from school. It's first day of school since winter." I tell him, taking another bite.
"Ah." He nods
It's quite for a while, while I continue eating. Peeta just stands on the other side of the counter, opposite me, tapping his fingers quietly. He looks around as I eat.
"I checked on Haymitch." He tells me
"Is he still passed out on the floor?" I ask him
He shakes his head with a chuckle "No, I found him over the toilet today. I cleaned him up a bit and gave him something to eat and drink, other than alcohol."
I nod as I finish the bun. I lick my thumb and pointing finger to rid of the remaining cheese. Silence consumes us. After a moment, I tell him; "I wish I could paint or bake like you."
He raises an eyebrow "Why?"
I shrug "So I always have something to do." I tell him "I don't like being bored." I add
He grins a little "I can teach you."
"Teach me what?" I ask
He shrugs "I don't know. What do you want to learn? I can teach you how to paint or bake."
I consider it reluctantly. He sees the look on my face and he shrugs. "You said you were bored. Just trying to help."
I narrow my eyes at him as he patiently waits for me to answer. He stares at me with a serious face for what seems like forever until I sigh.
"Fine, teach me how to bake then." I tell him and a hint of a grin appears on his face
"Are you sure you don't want to finish this whole tray first?" he chuckles slightly.
I glare at him half-heartedly. He walks over to the door and grabs his jacket. He opens the door and I go outside behind him. We walk the short distance to his house, three houses away from mine, in silence. I didn't bother getting a jacket since I'm not that cold.
When we reach his house, he steps in front of the door and opens it for me. I walk in and stand by the door way, waiting for him. He hangs his jacket by his door and ushers me to the kitchen. The interior of his house is like mine and any other house in the village, but it feels warmer here and it smells of the ingredients he uses for baking. Right now, it smells like butter and cheese from his latest creations.
He lays his hand on the counter and looks at me "So, what do you want to bake?" he asks
I shrug "I don't really know what you can bake." I tell him
"Why don't we start simple? Let's bake a loaf of bread." He tells me. Before I could answer, he's moving everywhere. Pulling out ingredients from his pantry and rolling pins, bowls, measuring cups, baking sheets, whisks, a mixer and other appliances I don't even know the name of. He snatches two aprons hanging on his pantry door and hands one to me.
After he ties his apron around himself and I put mine on, he claps his hand. "I'm going to teach you how to knead bread first." He tells me "But of course, you need the dough first."
He then proceeds to teach me as he mixes the ingredients in one bowl, pouring and adding things to it. He instructs me as he does this and I watch and listen carefully. After he's done adding the ingredients, he then mixes it until it's formed the soft dough. He rips a chunk off and pours flour onto the counter in front of him. He drops the dough on the floured part and starts kneading it.
He looks up at me as he kneads the dough. "Go on, take some. Add flour to the counter first though. It'll help it to not stick onto the counter."
I pour flour in front of me and reluctantly rip a small chunk of dough from the bowl.
"Don't be afraid Katniss, its' not going to bite you." He chuckles slightly
I slowly knead it between my hands, pressing and putting pressure onto it.
"I'm not sure if I'm doing this right." I tell him
"You're doing fine. Just make sure it's softer and chewy in the end." He tells me as he kneads his own bread.
He continues to tell me things about other bread he bakes. He informs me of things someone can add to a simple loaf of bread to make it tastier or to make it softer. After we're done kneading, he then takes out a tray and put a sheet of baking paper on top of it and put our kneaded dough on it and pop it in the oven. Mine looks more like a blob than a loaf of bread though.
"Let's leave that in there for twenty minutes and wait for the magic to unfold." He tells me with a smile. He really does enjoy baking. "What do you want to bake now?" he asks
I shrug again "Recommend anything?" I ask him
He thinks for a while "I know a pretty easy desert." He tells me and I smile slightly and nod. "Great! I'll take out the ingredients, can you wipe the counter?" he asks as he moves to the pantry and the fridge.
I wipe the flour from the counter and put the used bowls in the sink as he takes out various ingredients and set it onto the counter. He takes out eggs, milk, vanilla, chocolate and other things.
"What are we making?" I ask him
"Cupcakes!" he says "It's really easy to make, plus, we can give some to Prim!"
I smile "She'll like that."
For the next ten minutes, he instructs me on what ingredients to add, depending on which fallow I want my cupcakes to be. I picked chocolate this time because Prim loves chocolate. She first tasted it the day after we came back from the Capitol.
I help Peeta add and mix the ingredients together. I whisk the ingredients together in a bowl while he takes out the loaf of bread we baked earlier. They look great except mine looks a little deformed. We take small pieces and agree that it tastes good. We then resume on our new task. After their all mixed up, he takes out a tray with the cupcake cups on them and butter the sides while I scoop the cupcakes in. We leave it in the oven for thirty minutes.
For the next hour or so, he and I just bake random things that we think off of the top of our heads like cookies or wheat bread. He even showed me how to bake cheese buns. The muffins taste amazing, especially with the frosting he made. We made sure to save some for Prim.
Right now, he and I are waiting for the wheat bread and cookies to bake. I'm licking frosting off of a spoon when he turns to me. By now, our aprons are covered in flour, chocolate, frosting, sugar and other ingredients.
"Want to bake anything else?" he asks as he wipes his floury hands on his apron. I think for a moment of something we can bake. Suddenly, a thought comes to mind. I smile at him. "I do want to bake one more thing." I tell him
"What is it?" he asks
I smile at him "Do you know how to bake… Pita bread?" I ask
He raises an eyebrow, his eyes spark with amusement "Really Katniss?"
I look at him innocently "What? I'm just asking you, Peeta, if you can bake Pita bread."
He rolls his eyes and a laugh erupts from me. It surprises both of us. It's the first true laugh I've made since the games. He looks at me, shocked at first, but then he smiles and laughs along with me. After a while, he answers.
"I do, actually, know how to bake Pita bread." He tells me with a smile
"Well then, I'd like to have Peeta's Pita bread please."
He shakes his head at me "Really original."
After we're done mixing and making the dough, we start kneading. I knit my brows in concentration as I knead.
"I still don't know if I'm kneading this right!" I tell him
He sighs and abandons his dough. He walks over to me and stands beside me.
"Just relax your fingers." He tells me as he takes my hands in his and relaxes my strained fingers. "Use the bottom of your palm to press on the dough and apply little pressure." He tells me.
Suddenly, he moves from beside me and is now standing behind me, my back against his chest. His arms are wrapped around me as he holds my hands in his, helping me knead the dough. My senses suddenly sharpen at our closeness. I can feel his arm muscle slightly flex right next to my arm as he applies pressure onto the dough. I can hear his voice loud and clear next to my ear as he tells me what to do. I can smell the faint smell of the chocolate and flour that I know is on both of us now. I can feel his soft hands on my calloused ones.
"See, it's easy." He tells me as I am pulled back to reality.
I turn to face him and he smiles at me, our faces a mere inch apart. His smile slowly disappears as he notices our closeness. I look into his blue eyes and see that they are hooded. Our hands have stopped moving as we gaze at each other.
After what seems like forever, he opens his mouth to speak, but nothing comes out. Then, slowly, I start to lean in. I don't know what came over me, but I did. I stop. Our lips are so close to each other now that I can feel his chapped lips on mine. I can feel his slow breath on my lips. I look up to his eyes one more time and see him gazing down at me. Suddenly, our lips meet.
I see his eyes close before I close mine and our lips start to move. I don't know how long we kiss, and quite frankly, I don't really care, but the moment ends when suddenly, he pulls away with a gasp. He let's go of my hands and takes a step back.
"I can't do this, Katniss, I'm sorry." He whispers, stepping away from me, eyes glued to the floor.
"Why?" I croak
He looks up at me with sad eyes "Because it's not right."
"What's not right?" I push
"This! This isn't right! I can't just kiss someone who doesn't…" he pauses "…who doesn't love me back."
"You did it before." I tell him quietly
"Because that was when I thought you loved me too!" he exclaims "That was when I actually thought you were actually falling in love with me and wasn't acting." He looks me in the eyes and there is desperation in them "You mean everything to me Katniss. I don't want to lose you over some small kiss. I'd rather that you saw me as a friend than to not want to see me as anything at all. I'd rather be a friend who can make you laugh and smile than be the guy who confessed his love for you and got pushed away because you didn't feel the same way."
I look away from him.
"I'm sorry. I just don't want to get hurt again, knowing you can't love me back." He tells me
"Maybe I do love you, Peeta!" I suddenly snap "Did you ever think of that? Maybe, I'm not acting! Maybe, you are everything to me! Maybe, I can't ever survive without you!" I know I'm doing the wrong thing "Maybe, you're my whole life too! Maybe, just maybe, I love you as much as you love me! Have you ever thought of that, huh, Peeta?"
I am fighting to keep my voice from cracking and my lips from quivering as he stares at me with sad and hurt eyes.
"You know what the sad thing is Katniss?" he asks, his voice laced with bitterness and sadness "I do. I do think of those things. I think if it's possible that maybe you're not just acting, that maybe all you did was real and that maybe, you love me too!" his voice is rising slightly and he is fighting to keep his voice low
"I try so hard to remind myself that it can't be true, because that's just what they are, they're just maybe's and what if's. They will never come true!"
His eyes are shinning with unshed tears and I know I am also on the verge of tears. I try not to, but I can't help but look into his eyes that hold so much emotion. It hurts me to see him like this and it hurts even more knowing I'm causing all of this.
The emotions in his eyes are raw. They are full of despair and hurt and hopelessness and I just want to run to him and hug him but I know I can't. It will only cause him more confusion and hurt.
I want to say something, anything to make him feel better but words have never been my best skill. And I'm not sure any of my words will make him feel better. Although, I do know the words that he so badly wants to hear, but I know, saying it right now will make him think that I'm only saying it to make him feel less miserable and he will hurt even more.
So instead, I say the only thing I know how to say to him; "I'm sorry"
It is barely as whisper, but I know he hears it. His eyes sadden even more and he holds my gaze.
"I'm sorry too." He says softly and turns to leave. I hear his footsteps pound on the stairs and above me and I am left standing in the middle of his kitchen, all happy moments from before gone. I close my eyes.
I did it again. I was selfish and stupid. I didn't consider his feelings, like I always do. I pushed him into a situation none of us wanted to be in. I ruined the one moment both of us were actually happy in. He was trying so hard and I ruined it. I always ruin it. I always ruin it for him. My stupidity got in the way again. And again, my fire was too strong, too harsh for sweet and gentle Peeta to take and now I've set my dandelion on fire. I've set both of us in an inferno.
Hey guys! I hope you guys like this one-shot! This was set after the Victory Tour and before the Quarter Quell. Anyway, again, I hope you liked it! Hope it wasn't rushed or anything.
Please review, favorite or follow this story or me! Tell me if I need to improve some things, tell me a way to make this one-shot better and improve on my writing, or tell me if they were OOC. You can do all that by reviewing!
Again, thank you guys for reading! I appreciate it. To all of my other readers, thanks for the support! I love all of you! Until next time!
-Kayal-thebored