AN I don't own HP or any of the characters! Wolfstar fluffy oneshot.

Sirius was all attitude and sass. He talked back to teachers (except for McGonagall) and, with his satanic pendant (to piss off his parents at first, but then because he got used to the weight) and his many tattoos that were barely covered by the robes, he was the epitome of punk rock.

But he was also shorter and smaller. And Remus usually didn't make a big deal about it-or anything, really-but when they were alone he reminded Sirius of it every chance he got. Sometimes in little ways, like resting his arm on Sirius' head and putting stuff on the top shelf. But sometimes in bigger ways. Which was how Sirius ended up on the edge of the counter top, his legs wrapped around his boyfriend's waist, with his face pressed into a much larger, taller, stronger cardigan.

"Sirius…" But he was in a mood and the world felt a little too loud and the only thing that ever seemed to help things like this was burying his face in Remus' chest. Remus just chuckled and began to run his fingers through his long dark hair.

"People can see us, Siri." But if Sirius Black was one thing he was stubborn and he refused to be discouraged. He pouted and let his hands slip down, tracing Remus' ribs. He wound his way under the taller man's vest and up over his back, tracing scars and smoothing skin until he could get a firm grip on his shoulders. And then he held onto him like a lifeline.

"Pads, I thought you didn't want people-"

"Screw them." Remus laughed, the vibration reverberating out into Sirius' body until it felt like he was laughing too. That, combined with Remus' long, skilled fingers running through his hair was enough to let him relax a bit. Shitty day. He'd had a shitty, shitty day and all he wanted to do was hide in his boyfriend's oversized arms. He knew he could be a drama queen-hell he'd manufactured that reputation on purpose and he lived up to it-but this was not the kind of thing he could brush off and wait until later to get out of his system. Right now he just needed his Moony.

"Padfoot, I know you said you don't care but people are staring and I know that bothers you. Can we go upstairs?" He whined in protest. But Remus was bigger than him so ultimately he knew they would be going upstairs. He didn't have a problem with the idea of going upstairs, or being alone with Remus while the others were at the library, but he didn't like the idea of letting go or of facing an entire common room of staring.

But Remus was not having it. The taller man simply cupped a hand under each of his thighs and lifted him effortlessly. Vaguely, Sirius registered the sight of the stairs going by underneath them but as long as he kept his hold on Remus he didn't care. James was in the room but one look from Remus sent him running. Secretly, Sirius loved when the normally mild mannered nerd got protective or assertive. It made him feel like someone actually cared for once.

"Hey, what's with you today? Is everything okay?" He pulled, refusing to let go of Remus as he was placed on his own bed, and didn't relax until he felt familiar warmth beside him. He just wriggled, nuzzling into the taller's chest. And, suddenly, Sirius felt the mood shift. Gone was the chuckling concern and the amused little quips because now Remus was actually worried about him. Dammit. He whined, low in his throat, sounding almost dog like until Remus kissed his forehead.

"Sirius, you're scaring me slightly. What's wrong?" He whined again. Remus tangled his hand in Sirius' ebony locks and peppered his forehead and temple with kisses but it only helped so much.

"My…" What was he supposed to say? Not his brother, not really, because James was his brother now and the Potters were his family. What did that make him?

"Regulus.. he sent me a letter. I burned it." Remus cooed and smoothed his hair, rocking him a bit side to side in some form of comfort, but it was barely enough to take the edge off.

"Did you read it?" He nodded, shivering when Remus kissed his pulse point. "What did he say?" It took him a solid minute to get enough breath and steadiness to even think of answering. He could tell Remus, right? If there was anyone he shouldn't have any qualms about telling it was Moony but he still hesitated.. part of him wanted to keep up this charade. To do everything he could just to make his family seem not that bad to the other man. But they were that bad.

"It was a suicide note, more or less. He said sorry for a lot of things when we were younger, but none of the right ones. He… asked me to make up for leaving him behind. To join him now." Remus whisked the tears away before they even fell but Sirius just shuddered. "He got the dark mark. Last night. Said I could still come home if I cared about him at all."

"Oh, Pads…" And then Remus was kissing him so fiercely he barely had time to catch his breath before it was ripped away from him. Normally, Sirius was the one who was hungry and rough with PDA and Remus was gentle. It had taken over a year to convince Remus that he wasn't going to hurt the smaller man, even on accident, which was why it took Sirius by such surprise when Remus pressed a bruising kiss to his lips and nearly fought him, as if trying to breathe the life back into him.

"Moony?" And that fragmented little nickname was all it took to halt Remus completely. He stopped, now hovering with his body just inches above Sirius' on the bed, and then collapsed. He hugged Sirius so tightly that the tears smudged into Sirius' hair. Remus was crying. Suddenly, Sirius wanted to throw up and run and scream and do anything but lay there because nothing was supposed to hurt his boyfriend least of all himself.

"I'm sorry, I'll-" But Remus gripped him and pulled him back down onto the bed the second he tried to get up.

"No, no Pads. I just… I care about you. So much. And they aren't your family-we are. I just wanted you to know that it's okay, you didn't do anything wrong, and we love you. I love you."

That… that made Sirius stop. They had talked for hours on end at night in the astronomy tower and that conversation was burned into his memory. Remus, staring at his own scars with such disgust and hatred. Monsters can't love, Sirius. Sirius had cried that night after Remus fell asleep because the implication was there: Remus was so wholeheartedly convinced that he was a monster, that he couldn't love someone without putting them in danger, that he would never allow it to get that far. He was with Sirius because they said it wasn't a real relationship. It was just practice, just friends, just their animagi bonding. But it wasn't love.

"You what?" Remus was suddenly much less confident and there was a flush in his cheeks that screamed of humiliation but… he'd said it. "No, Remus. Tell me what you said." He wasn't kidding anymore either, especially not now. James and Peter and even Lily had all said they loved him sometimes more seriously than others but Remus… Remus was very careful and very intentional with those words.

"I.. love you. Yeah, I love you Sirius. I love you." Fuck he couldn't breathe. The more he said it, the more confident Remus got with it until it was more assertive than Sirius had ever seen him. More than when he was angry, more than when someone made a quip about Sirius' family or a second year's self harm scars. Remus was confident now, and staring him directly in the eyes.

"Sirius Black, I love you. And as much as I wish I could kill every person who ever put that fear in your eyes, I can't. But please, please know you made the right choice. You didn't abandon Regulus, he chose to stay. And they aren't your family. We are. You are loved here, Sirius, I will always love you." Sirius had never felt smaller in his life and he'd never clung to Remus as tightly as he was just now. He felt like the second he loosened his grip it would all disappear. This feeling would disappear.

"I… love you. Moony.." The smile that lit up Remus' face was the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen and he kissed him before it could blind him. It was his turn to be gentle and affectionate. He felt strange saying those words, even after all these years, but the rush of warmth when he did manage to was indescribable. Remus was so happy.

"I can't believe I just said that." But they both just laughed a bit in amazement. Since he was a boy, Sirius had only said those three words to his mother and his brother. The first had always resulted in a torturing curse, the second in a sneer of disgust and betrayal. Those three words meant pain. Nothing but pain. But, now, those words meant receiving the brightest smile he'd ever seen and the privilege of kissing the love of his life.

"Love of your life, huh?" He flushed but Remus just kissed his cheeks with that same smile. When had he become the meek, uncertain one in their relationship?

"Relax, Padfoot. I love you too, remember?"

Thanks for reading! Please please review I'm relatively new to HP fics... should I do more? Especially wolfstar.