Now that we are over as the loving kind,
We'll be dreaming ways to keep the good alive.
Only when we want is not a compromise,
I'd be pouring tears into your drying eyes.

Bella and I had been engaged for roughly a year when she decided to change her mind. Again. To the same man she left me for. She swore that she was sorry and that she still loved me, but how could I believe her? And how could I be mad at her? She was my imprint, my love. I only wanted what was going to make her happy, but I really wanted an excuse to kill the bloodsucker. He always came and took her away from me.

This time, though, I thought I had her for good. She had cried into my shoulder, saying how she wanted a "safe" and "comfortable" life here in Forks, how she would love nothing more than to cook all day for my overeating friends and me. Of course, I couldn't say no. This was the girl of my dreams.

And now, this same girl, my ex-fiancé, calls me everyday and night wanting to see me and talk to me. She says she misses me. She says she needs me now, and that Edward doesn't make her happy in the ways I could.

Friends, lovers or nothing,
There can only be one.
Friends, lovers or nothing,
There'll never be an in-between, so give it up.

But she won't leave him. I am the guy she runs to when she needs sexual tension released, something obviously Edward knows little about. Especially when it comes to her. And little indecisive Bella thinks she can have both of us. She can have her warm, masculine, sexual lover Jacob and then run home to her new fiancé, the cold, sensitive, musically talented Edward. If only she knew how much these little rendezvous weighed on my heart, how much they still attached me to her. Which is why, sometimes, I find it hard to say no to her sweet little voice.

You whisper, "come on over", 'cause you're two drinks in,
But in the morning I will say goodbye again.
Think we'll never fall into the jealous game?
The streets flood with blood of those who felt the same.

She says we can be secret lovers. She says Edward won't find out because he can't read her mind, and she just tells me to stay away from him. Alice can't see any involvement between the two of us. It's perfect. The perfect game. The perfect lie. She almost had me convinced. I tried to ignore the hole in my heart that was growing larger with each visit. How could I keep giving myself up to this girl that clearly was using me. She has no feelings for me anymore; she just enjoys the company, and the sex. And she would get mad when I told her how I felt about her being with Edward. She didn't understand why I couldn't just leave my feelings at the door like she could.

Friends lovers or nothing. We can really only ever be one. Friends lovers or nothing. We'll never be the in-between so give it up.

Had I convinced myself this could work? That I could really make love to the woman I almost married and let her leave back to her new man? Bella was coming over again tonight, and I needed to think of where this was going, and if it needed to be stopped.

Anything other than yes is no,
Anything other than stay is go,
Anything less than 'I love you' is lying.

I watched the sun setting through my window as Bella lay next to me in my bed. I stroked her hair, fighting back tears as I remembered the days when we would do this and she wouldn't leave after. How we would lay in bed all night, her tiny frame enveloped in my arms. She smiled sweetly at me, her soft brown eyes the perfect size. "I love you Bella," I whispered, the pain welling in my chest. I waited, praying, that she would tell me the same. Plucking up the courage, I took a deep breath and sat up, pulling on my jeans. "Do you still love me?" I asked, my back turned to her. I could hear her chewing her bottom lip, her feet rustling the covers uncomfortably. "I...Jacob," she ended, almost condescendingly. As if I could ask such a ridiculous question. But it had to be answered. "Bella Swan, do you still love me the way I still love you?" I was on my feet now, crossing my arms and staring at her harshly. She glanced down. "You're perfect for what I need you to be." "Then you need to leave." I surprised myself at my cold tone, but I had finally said what needed to be said months ago, when she started this affair. "You've been lying to me, and using me, and you make me feel awful. Really, you do. We can't be two things, Bella. I guess you've chosen our relationship. You want to be friends, but right now I'm pretty sure I don't want anything. Please get out of my house." Bella looked honestly shocked. I had never been this assertive with her. Instead, I had been allowing her to torture me with her fake love and emotion. "Fine," she said curtly, gathering her clothes, dressing, and leaving the room without another word. I sighed. She was my imprint, and I would never stop loving her. It took every ounce of my being to stand in the same spot next to my bed and not run to her, embrace her, tell her she was perfect and that if she needed me for this then it was ok. But the wolf inside me, the strong, independent animal, rooted me down. When I heard her loud truck start and back down the drive, I sighed and sat back down on the bed. Bella Swan had just walked out of my life for the last time. And surprisingly, I was OK with that. I pulled on my t-shirt and reassured myself...

We'll never be the in-between so give it up.