A/N: I know I need to be writing my other fics, but seriously, I need support.
Shattered
Undyne was the one that found him.
"Um, Pap," her voice was gruff as always, but softer and distant. "I got him, but there's something seriously wrong..." Panicked buzzing came from the other end of the phone.
Sans wasn't sure what to call the thing he'd been doing. It wasn't weeping or sobbing, because there weren't any tears, despite everything. But his chest ached something fierce, and it was getting harder and harder to breathe. Every few moments, he released quiet sounds of agony and hopelessness. He'd couldn't stop the desperate noises if he tried. Which he had.
Undyne looked at him worriedly from the corner of her eye, trying to keep the phone conversation from reaching his ears. It was a wasted effort, because this tiny corner of Waterfall was silent but for his pained whimpers and her whispered concerns.
He knew exactly how he got to this point, though maybe not how he got to this specific place... It all started with a pacifist run. Like every time before, the little demon became friends with everyone, and he finally hoped, that maybe, this time, there would be no more resets. But again, like every time before, the human turned to neutral runs, killing more and more monsters as they went. Until they killed Papyrus. Again. That was the start of the genocide run.
As Sans lay dying at the end of the most recent genocide run, something in him cracked. It didn't matter what he did. Papyrus would always die. And Sans would never be able to get revenge. His soul began to break more and more as his thoughts circled. Nothing he did would ever amount to anything, and he was just wasting everyone's time. It was best for everyone if he just disappeared and stopped trying to be some kind of hero.
He couldn't save anyone.
"Hey, bonehead," Undyne whispered, kneeling in front of him suddenly. Or maybe he just hadn't noticed when she appeared... Why was she here? Didn't she have betterthings to do? "You're a real jerk, ya know that? Papyrus has been worried sick. And Grillby's been totally upset since you disappeared. We thought... with your health... We thought something real bad happened to you."
He wanted to cry in that moment, but he didn't deserve it. Everything was his fault, and even when he tried to go away, he somehow still caused problems.
"Oh, Sans," she sighed. "Let's get you home." She reached for him. Without even realizing what he was doing, he teleported to the other end of the cavern, and the wounded sounds increased. "Sans?" She was really worried now. The fish monster tugged at her ponytail, an anxious habit she'd never really managed to kick. "I'm just gonna take you home... You're hurt, and we gotta make sure you're okay."
He pushed himself deeper into the corner, burying his face in his knees. He wasn't worth the effort. She should go away and live her life, find the beautiful story she was meant to and have her happy ending. Papyrus should do the same, should get out and see the sun and drive a car and do everything he ever dreamed.
Something fell to the ground in front of him.
He didn't bother moving.
"Aw, come on!" Undyne growled. "It's one of those stupid bars Pap keeps bringing me. It'll make you feel better. You need to eat it!" She waited for less than a second before continuing. "You didn't want me to touch you so I'm not! Just eat the freaking bar, okay?!"
Sans flinched back from her angry voice. He hiccuped and tentatively reached out to grab it. Nothing happened, and he quietly nibbled on the corner of the bar. He didn't know why she wanted him to eat it so badly; he would eat it if only so she could go away and forget him.
"Geez," she huffed, dropping to sit crossed-legged on a rock. Her arms grumpily crossed over her chest. "You really are a piece of work. C'mon, bonehead. Say something! You're creeping me out." He kept his silence. "Augh, this is so messed up. You good? We should head back." He shook his head. "Welp. Too bad!"
She lunged for him, but he teleported across the room again. She growled and tried, over and over to catch him. After a few more unsuccessful attempts, she started throwing spears to see if she could trap him or pin him in place. He continued to dodge.
"AUGHHH! JUST COME HOME ALREADY!" She screamed and lurched forward once last time. He shifted away. Her head slammed against the rock wall and she slumped to the ground.
It didn't hurt really, and she was already pushing herself up when Sans sobbed suddenly and was there. He wrapped his arms around her, filling her with bright blue magic. It warmed her and pushed away her pain, leaving her too awed to move. The tiny cut healed, and other bruises faded. In fact, some of her older injuries started to fix themselves.
Quickly, she pushed him away. She felt better than she had in years, but the drain on his magic made Sans look liable to collapse. Well, even more liable to collapse than he was before...
In fact, he did collapse, dropping straight down with no attempts to catch himself. Undyne barely managed to catch him. She found herself staring at him in shock for several minutes. Tears slid down his cheeks, and the horrible noises had continued. His breathing came fast and hard; he was still panicking over her injury.
"Shh, Sans," she mumbled, shocked and quivering with adrenaline. "I'm okay. You healed me. I'm not hurt." She continued to soothe him until he began to calm. "Sheesh. I didn't know you could do that, bonehead." They rested for a moment. "You're a real mess, huh."
With a sigh, she pulled a small blanket from her bag and wrapped it around him. He tried to struggle, tried to get away, tried to let her be free of him. But she had basically swaddled like a baby, and he had no chance of getting out.
Undyne watched as those wide, helpless eyes turned on her, and realized she had never felt more needed as the Captain of the Royal Guard. This, this was why she did what she did. To keep her fellows monsters safe. Not for the glory, or the battle, or even the money. She wanted to help people, and now...? Now she could protect Sans, help him, and get him back to his usual self.
"C'mon, Sans," she smiled as gently as she could (which wasn't very much and actually looked terrifying). "We're just gonna get you home to your brother." The tiny skeleton stilled at those words and went silent. She frowned, but she lifted him easily and started their journey.
-{[(*)]}-
"Hey!" Undyne shouted, staring up at the dim windows of the house. Sans was sleeping restlessly against her chest. Having started whimpering again after a bit of traveling, he had quickly exhausted himself. "Papyrus! Let us in, will ya?!"
Almost immediately, the front door ripped open and Papyrus pulled Sans to him. The tiny skeleton shifted in distress but didn't wake. They moved inside, and Papyrus directed her to the phone.
"Alphys?" She called, finally having decided who was most important for this situation. "We found Sans... Yeah, he's back at the house in Snowdin. He's fine physically, I think? Yeah I know that's not a lot to go off of! I, just, you haven't seen him, Al..." There was a long pause as Undyne's confidence seem to fade. "It's bad. I think there might be something wrong with his soul..." Alphys chattered anxiously, gathering supplies. The background noise was chaotic on both ends. "I don't know what to do. We need your help."
"I-I'll be there as soon as I c-can," the yellow monster promised; she was stuttering under the stress of the situation, but her voice was strong. "Now where did I p-put that-"
Alphys accidentally hung up the phone.
Undyne smiled slightly, shaking her head. She sobered quickly and hurried back to Papyrus and Sans. The smaller skeleton was still asleep, but he was flushed and uncomfortable. Papyrus was trying everything in the book. Putting a warm washcloth on his head, feeding him magical food, bundling him in more blankets. The younger skeleton looked up at her with a helpless expression.
"Undyne, what is happening to him?" Papyrus pleaded. "Why won't he wake up?"
"I dunno," the fish monster rubbed the back of her neck. "But Alphys will be here soon. She can help."
"Yeah..." The skeleton mumbled unconvincingly. "Yeah." He stroked his brother's skull, vulnerable in his sheer lack of options.
-[]-
Alphys arrived some time later, having worked herself into a frenzy on the way over and dropped her things several times. She knocked timidly and struggled to keep the collection in her arms balanced. Undyne opened the door; her face was drooped in worry. Alphys offered her a weak smile, then carefully entered the skeleton brothers' home.
The supplies were set on a table near a small pet rock, and the tiny yellow monster hesitantly moved towards where a sleeping Papyrus was still cradling his brother. Gently, she removed Sans from his arms and unwrapped him from the blankets.
She took a deep breath, called forward her magic, and summoned the smaller skeleton's soul. Much slower than expected, the tiny gray heart drifted out of his body. A large crack ran through the middle, but smaller cracks littered the edges. The soul was faded from its original white color, with black spots easily showing the drained color.
Alphys gasped loudly, her hands flying to cover her scaly muzzle. She lost control of her magic, and Sans's soul disappeared back into his fluttering ribcage. A sob burst from her throat. She buried her face in hands, trembling.
"Alphys?" Undyne mumbled, staring at where Sans's soul had been. "Alphys, what was that? Why did his soul look like that?" The yellow monster shook her head, unable to even whisper a response. "Alphys, c'mon! It can't be that bad-"
"...Sans?" Papyrus had blearily woken up. He looked over his friends tiredly, then seemed to jolt to life. "Alphys? What has happened? Is my brother okay?"
"Really Alphys, we can fix it, right?!"
"Why won't Sans wake up? Did you find anything?"
"There's gotta be something we can do, right?!"
"Sans is going to be-"
"Sans is Falling Down!" Alphys shouted. She stood up, glaring at them fiercely, then she saw Sans in the corner of her eye and fell down weeping once more. She grabbed the older skeleton's hand, clutching it to her chest as her entire body was wracked by grief.
"Falling... Down?" Papyrus questioned. He glanced at Undyne, seeing her blank expression. "But, we can help him get better, can't we? Alphys, you're amazing! I believe you can-"
"I can't!" Alphys cried. She crumpled a bit further on the floor. "I can't! I can't i can't!" She screeched the words over and over until Undyne dragged Papyrus out of the room.
"Undyne, what is going on? Sans, he's going to be okay, yes? Sans, he has to get better- he has to-"
"Papyrus," Undyne snapped. Her face formed a snarl before fading back into the previous blank stone. "I obviously don't know everything Alphys does, but I know enough. Monsters are made of magic, but we're held together by the positive feelings in our souls. When a monster starts to spend too much time around negative feelings or influences, it makes them very sick and picks away at their very being.
"Eventually, it reaches a point where the monster's soul can't bear it anymore. It starts to shatter apart, and they fall down into a deep sleep. Their soul will finally break apart on its own, taking the monster's body with it. There is no way to bring a monster back after they've Fallen Down," Undyne finished gravely.
"No," Papyrus shook his head, backing away until he bumped into the counter. "No, there has to be some solution-" Suddenly, his face lit up. "He hasn't Fallen Down yet! Alphys said he was Falling! So- So if we surround him with positive feelings, we can catch him! We can stop him from-"
"No, Papyrus," Undyne growled. "There's nothing we can do-"
"I don't believe that!" Papyrus yelled. "There's always a way out, a way to fix things! We can save Sans, I know it!"
"Aren't you listening to me?! We don't even know what caused all these negative feelings! He's generating them on his own! Even if every monster in the Underground surrounded him with all the positive feelings in their souls, it would never be enough to stop it!" She screamed. Her arm slashed angrily, forming one of her energy spears. She pointed it at Papyrus threateningly. "You need to listen to me, because if you don't accept this now you're going to hurt yourself when he's gone, and I can't loose both of you!"
"But there has to be-"
"NO!" The Captain of the Royal Guard stormed over to the too-tall sink, opened the cabinet underneath and pulled one of the glass figures Sans had collected from the dump. "You see this? We're going to say this is Sans's soul." Without a moment of hesitation, she rammed the spear through it, sending shards of glass all over the floor. "Once something is broken like that, you can't fix it! You can glue all the pieces together, but it will never be the same! It'll be twisted and ugly and horrible. You can't fix his soul."
"Sans," Papyrus protested, his eye sockets wide and wet. "But... I- Sans... Sans!" The skeleton broke down, slumping against the cabinets and sliding to the floor. His magic swirled around him like a storm; it reacted to his emotions, turbulent and violent. "Sans..."
"I know," Undyne whispered. She moved over and curled up by her best friend. Her arms felt awkward around his large chest piece, but she knew comfort needed to be offered.
The house was silent but for the soft weeping from the lower floor.
-{[(*)]}-
Papyrus shuffled tiredly through his morning routine and slowly made breakfast. Last night had been emotionally draining for everyone, so he offered for the others to stay the night. Undyne and Alphys slept in his room while he crashed on the couch. The couch was short for his tall skeleton body, and he woke up with several uncomfortable 'pops' up his spine.
After he finished cooking, the young monster realized no one else would be up for a while, so he put the food in the oven to keep it warm. He looked around the living room with a gentle frown. He found himself puttering around, tidying things up and returning the house to its usual state. Finally, he came to the familiar sock, covered in sticky notes and glaring up at him from the floor.
Papyrus stared down at the sock with a fragile expression. His lower jaw trembled, and his brow bones twitched. His eyes flooded once again and he slowly sank to his knees in from of the sock. He wrapped his arms around himself, unable to muster the strength to even cry properly.
Slowly, he reached out his hand to pick up the clothing article, but as soon as he touched it, he jumped back like he'd been burned. He hiccuped once, high and quivering. He pushed himself off the ground and stumbled upstairs to his big brother's room.
Sans was under the blankets, his breathing slow and easy. His face was relaxed, and Papyrus could see the creases in his brother's skull from constant, forced smiling. Papyrus hadn't see his brother so peaceful in years, and he wondered when things had started to change.
The younger brother dropped down beside Sans's bed. He ignored the mess that coated the rest of the room, just sat there and trembled. Carefully, like his brother might break, Papyrus gripped the other skeleton's hand. There were no tears, no whimpers or whispers. The room was suffocated by silence...
"Sup, bro," a weak voice breathed. Papyrus's eyes lit suddenly as he looked up sharply from playing with his brother's phalanges.
"You should know what 'sup', brother!" The younger skeleton cried, voice cracking. "You... You..." Sans face quickly firmed, looking the most serious Papyrus had ever seen.
"Pap, what's going on?" The smaller skeleton asked. He winced slightly, trying to push himself up. "Was there a hum-"
"You're Falling," Papyrus whispered. His skull jerked to the side, refusing to watch as Sans fell back to the mattress.
"I am?"
The younger monster looked up to his brother, finding a completely unexpected expression. Instead of being upset or concerned, Sans looked so, so happy. His entire body had somehow relaxed even further, even as joyful tears bubbled up in his eyes. Sans's eyelights were the brightest they had ever been, almost shining with the original brilliance of his soul.
"Sans, I don't understand," Papyrus pleaded. "Weren't you happy? What hurt you like this? We didn't have much, but we've always had each other, and I don't-"
"Oh, Pap," Sans mumbled affectionately. He held one of Papyrus's cheekbones, directing his attention to Sans's serene face. "A monster like me? Heh, we're always meant to struggle. I love you, more than anything, Pap. But..." He sighed gently and gave a heart-breaking smile. "...I'm glad to be going. It's time."
"No!" Papyrus protested, finally starting to cry again. "You're still young! There's still so many ways you can live! You can turn your life around! You can be happy again!"
Sans shook his head slowly. "Sorry, Papyrus. I'll never be happy as long as I'm still alive..." His eyes started to flutter shut, but his younger brother shook him awake again. "Pap, you have to let me go... I'm hurting like this."
"Please, don't leave me alone!" The little brother begged. He clutched at Sans's jacket and hand, trying to hold him closer. Sans's smile faded away. His eye sockets drifted over the room, landing on Undyne in the doorway and Alphys's shadow behind her. He nodded once to them and turned back to his baby bro.
"You'll never be alone, Papyrus. You just gotta remember, some one cares about you."
Papyrus sobbed heavily and buried his face in Sans's sternum as the smaller monster fell asleep.
-{[(*)]}-
Sans woke a few times after that, though he usually remained restfully asleep. The brief times he woke, he awakened in a burst of negative emotions, screaming and crying incoherently. He didn't recognize anyone, instead seeing them as threats. Luckily, his magic was too drained for him to attack them, but the emotional pain was often too much.
Alphys soon retreated back to her lab, hiding away. Undyne stayed, but she often went on walks and jogs. Papyrus stayed in the house, refusing to leave Sans alone.
A few monsters had stopped by to offer their condolences. They brought food or just emotional support. Their presence was what helped the small group of friends keep it together.
-{[(*)]}-
After a good week and a half, Papyrus had run out of things to do around the house. He had cleaned every inch of the abode, outside of Sans's room. He had cooked endless amounts of pasta. He had repainted his battle body. There was nothing to occupy him besides Undyne, and Mettaton on the tv. Even his favorite sexy rectangle didn't keep his attention for long.
He kept wandering up to Sans's room. The older skeleton had started sleeping for longer and longer periods, waking up for less and less time. And Papyrus couldn't help checking up on him, feeling like any minute he would find his big brother faded to dust.
Undyne was on a jog, and Papyrus was actually on his way up to check on Sans again, when someone knocked on the door. Slowly, the skeleton went to it and opened it. At first, he thought the person had left, but then a small cough from below caught his attention. He glanced down, finally seeing a small creature in a striped sweater.
"Oh..." He mumbled. He bent down to the child's level. "Hello, little one! Are you lost- Wait a minute... Are you... A HUMAN?!" He straightened immediately out of surprise; he soon slouched down again, rubbing the back of his skull. "I'm sorry, small human. But I am not currently looking to capture anyone."
The human scowled, glaring up at him. They made several sharp motions with their hands, but Papyrus was far too tired at this point to even hope to make sense of it.
"I apologize. I did not mean to imply that you are not worthy of being captured," Papyrus offered softly. "My brother is just very sick, and I shall not be leaving the house. But my friend Undyne will be here soon, and she can capture you for me!" The human paled at that and quickly scampered away.
-{[(*)]}-
With the new information, Frisk quickly made their way to Waterfall. They bought the notebook from that loony old turtle in the cave, then hurriedly made their way back to Snowdin, writing all the while. When they got back to the skeletons' house, it appeared Undyne hadn't returned.
They knocked once more and shoved the notebook in Papyrus's face.
"My name is Frisk. What's wrong with your brother..." Papyrus read. "Oh, well... Sans is... He is..." The monster whimpered slightly as he finally managed the words; admitting it out loud made it so much more real, even as he had already tried to accept it. "My brother is Falling Down." The human jolted in shock. They quickly pulled their notebook back and started writing again.
[Do you know why?]
"No!" Papyrus frowned, getting misty eyed. "He didn't say anything about it until it was too late, and we don't even know why he was hurting! He's just... He's just going to disappear! Forever! And I'll never see him again and-" The skeleton broke down again, crying into his ungloved phalanges. He refused to wear his battle body right now; he didn't want to damage it, because Sans made it for him and if it was destroyed he'd lose everything he had of his brother-
The human, Frisk, slowly approached and wrapped their arms around him. They consoled him for a moment, then looked around him to see inside. The looked up the stairs to Sans's room.
Was this their fault?
-{[(*)]}-
Although they had planned to reset, come back, apologize, and finally give everyone their happy ending, Frisk found them-self wanting to save Sans instead. But by the time they gathered the determination to pull the comedian back from the Fall, the skeleton had already slipped away. His soul split quietly in the middle of the night, and Papyrus checked in the next morning on a small pile of dust.
The funeral had barely begun when Frisk decided to go back and do it again.
-{[(*)]}-
Frisk hurried through the Ruins, barely talking to anyone, even Toriel. They raced down the hallway to Snowdin, and further down to the bridge before Sans's sentry station. Once more, Sans was not there to greet them. Papyrus wasn't there either.
Each Royal Guard they encountered was solemn and weary, making Frisk worry. Things were changing; they couldn't predict what would happen anymore.
Just as they reached the beginning of the actual town of Snowdin, a horrified screech resounded through the area. It came from the skeleton brothers' house.
Frisk ran through the thick snow, ignoring the worried murmurs of the town's residents. They forced their way through the door and ran up the stairs. They stopped short at the open door to Sans's room.
"Sans!" Papyrus sobbed. "Sans, wake up! Why won't you- Please, you- Wake up!"
Frisk stumbled forward and held out their hand. Summoning all their determination, they let their soul manifest in front of them. With quick movements they pressed both hands to the comedian's chest and channeled their determination into him.
The small skeleton arched suddenly, letting out a feral, animalistic scream. Papyrus jumped back in surprise, then quickly tried to pull Frisk away.
"STOP IT!" He shouted. "STOP! YOU'RE HURTING HIM! WHAT ARE YOU DOING- STOP IT!"
But they refused.
They forced more and more power into Sans's body, yanking back from Falling, little by little. But all too soon, their magic began to overpower the weak skeleton. His magic depleted rapidly, making the small monster howl in agony.
"DON'T!" Papyrus pushed at Frisk. He fired bone attacks at them, which they carefully dodged. "STOP IT! NO MORE! LEAVE HIM ALONE!" With a sudden moment of clarity, the towering skeleton called forward one of his blaster attacks, letting it hit the human at full force. "HAVEN'T YOU DONE ENOUGH?!"
There was a suddenly cracking noise.
Sans's body splintered almost in slow motion, gradually turning to dust and collapsing in on the sheets.
The house was abruptly, terrifyingly silent.
Frisk stared down at their hands, wondering what had gone wrong. A chill went down their spine, and they were afraid to turn around.
A FIERCE ROAR SHOOK THE FOUNDATIONS OF THE HOUSE-
"HOW COULD YOU?!" Papyrus screeched. Every attack he knew demolished the spot where a human had once been standing. A red heart hovered for a moment before shattering and falling to the ground in hundreds of tiny pieces.
-{[(*)]}-
The next reset, Sans was dust before they even arrived at the house.
After that, he was gone before they left the Ruins.
Eventually, the once comedian was gone before they had even fallen.
With each reset, he seemed to fade away earlier and earlier...
-{[(*)]}-
Papyrus swept through his house. Everything was put away neatly. The fridge was filled with containers of spaghetti. His armor (standard for any Royal Guard) had been carefully polished. The paperwork in the office was purposefully organized. Everything on his to-do list had been completed.
So why did he feel like something was missing?
With cautious dedication, Papyrus worked his way through the house once more. He looked over his beautiful kitchen, the empty table, the perfectly clean couch-
He came to a stop beside the television, staring down at the space beside it. His eyes practically burned a hole in the floor. Something was supposed to be there...
But what?
A/N: Hope you enjoyed~
QUESTION OF THE UPDATE: What is your favorite find of hat? I personally love beanies and baseball caps. I really want to get a hat that looks like Dipper Pines.