It was meant to work. That was all I could think about when we drove back to court. The stake was meant to save him. The charm didn't work and now my Dimitri is officially dead. Not dhampir or strigoi, no he was dead. And Lissa was the one that killed him.

My body was numb. Numb from the cold. Numb from my injuries. Numb from the shock. But most of all; numb from the pain of losing my soul mate. I didn't matter if we never said the words to each other I knew that's what we are, were. Even when he was a Strigoi I couldn't kill him. His hair was still the same, his voice still felt like a caress. And the body could be so gentle yet in a seconds notice become a God warrior. You couldn't ask me what my favourite thing about Dimitri was because it was him. Every gorgeous part of his handsome body melted my heart like butterscotch. His soul knew mine and I knew his. Even when he wanted me to become a soulless monster I still loved him. I think he could have killed me and I still would have loved him. It wouldn't have mattered what he was because I would have loved him no matter what.

Now though? Now I was aching from the realisation that it's all over. No more 'I love you'. No more kisses or hugs. Nope, just emptiness. I always had a goal that involved him. First, it was graduation and then I could be with him. Then he turned strigoi and I had the goal of killing him. I know it sounds horrible but I felt like I could say goodbye to him in my own way. Killing him would have felt like I was freeing his soul and the promise that I made to him. The promise that if he became a monster that I would destroy him. I thought I killed him. I didn't and it was a saving grace. I had the hope that we could save him with a stake enchanted by spirit. It didn't work. The stake worked like any other stake and now he is dead. Dead to the world, never to come back again.

The worst part was that I couldn't say goodbye to him. As soon as he was dead I was pulled back, not allowed to go to his body. It was burned like every other body. They treated him like any other strigoi. They were wrong though, he was special. He was Dimitri, which made him much more magical than any other red eyed creature.

It was meant to work.That was all I could think about. It didn't matter that Lissa repeatedly apologised for what she did. It didn't matter because he was dead and there was nothing anyone could do about it. It could have saved hundreds of other dhampir or Moroi from killing other people but in that moment it didn't matter. It didn't matter because it didn't work for Dimitri; the only man I will ever swear to love.

Plenty more fish in the sea.That's what everyone says. Well are there really more fish in the sea when all you can do is compare them to the fish that you had to flush down the toilet? That one has the same eyes, that one has the same length hair, that one has a similar laugh. They all individually had one of my favourite qualities together, but on their own? On their own they were just one characteristic in a random man.

I guess that was the moment that I knew there would only ever be one man for me. I knew if I had one wish it would be for him to come back. It would be for him to return to my arms, even if it was only for one night. All I wanted was myDimitri back. Of course that would have been too much to ask. Rose Hathaway to be happy? Why, she doesn't deserve it. I knew that Dimitri is the reason that has kept me sane over the last couple of years. Sure Lissa was like my sister but she didn't know the true effects that darkness has on me. Dimitri does.

"So glad I caught you Rose." I looked around to find that I was walking around the court, not bothering to look where I was going. Not a normal thing a guardian would do but who cares he was meant to survive. I turn around and find Rhonda in step with me.

"Hello." I say without the usual Rose bravado.

"Come with me. The cards are calling me to find you." She says in a usual mystical way. She latches onto my hand and drags me over to her room. I sit down on one side of the table and she sits on the other, already shuffling the cards. "Split into three." She instructs and I do just that. I place down the eight of clubs, the king of hearts and the 10 of clubs. She stares at the cards with a mix between a frown and a smile.

"What do the cards read this time?" I huff out at my usual crappy responses with these cards.

"Patience Rose. Love with come sooner than you think." That was all she says. That was it. Nothing bad but nothing good either.

"How can I find love if Dimitri's gone?" I ask, tears nearly tipping over my eyes. I blink a couple of times to make them disappear.

"Oh dear child, just wait. Love is a treasured position and who is to say that it should be limited to just one person? I will never say to love two men at the same time but honestly don't hold only one love to a person who can never do the same. Live Rose and you will go far." Her hands cover mine and I feel like she has hypnotised me with her words. "Now go Rose and find a happy place." She shoos me with her hands and I leave the room rather dizzily.

'Love will come sooner than you think'. The words snapped something inside of me. Something that kept my heart locked on the one information that Dimitri still could come back. But I knew he couldn't. He was dead and no one could ever save him. I knew my love for Dimitri would always be strong but I also knew that I couldn't carry on the rest of my life wallowing in my own misery. Dimitri wouldn't want it and neither would I.

I couldn't get over the death of Dimitri back at court. I couldn't even get over in it St. Vladimir's. Hell, there would be no vampire place on earth that would help me get over it and that was why I left. I went to try and find another life. I went to find what Rhonda told me to look for. But more importantly I went to search for the lost parts of myself.

And that was the reason I left court.

Some of you might be thinking that you have seen this before, that's because you have. I have two accounts one for ONE-SHOTS and the other for normal story. So don't think I'm stealing anyone elses' work because I'm not :D Review, REVIEW, REVIEW!

Dreamworldstorymaker :D