Handwriting on the Wall

DISCLAIMER: I don't own FFVII or its characters, just the story idea. If I did own said characters, Vincent would be sleeping in a coffin under my bed. :)


During my unnatural, extended life…I have only ever loved two women. Yes, of course, I have many female friends, most of them made and lost during my times with AVALANCHE, but there had been only two that I've loved with my heart, my soul…my very being.

Just two.

The first…Lucrecia. Even now, today, when I speak her name...it burns. It is as if the word, dragged forth from my innermost being, has the power to wound me. She was a young woman snatched away by time, cruelties of others, and my own black fate.

Perhaps it was my fault she is gone…perhaps not. But whenever I think of her, I bear the blame. I bear the guilt of her pain, as it is my own.

Lucrecia had been the first woman I had ever loved. My own mother died before I was born, and as I was raised by a scientist and became a Turk, women were not often around. But I loved Lucrecia…from the moment ours eyes met I loved her. She completed my soul…bringing the misplaced shards back together once more, making me whole.

I've often thought of how our ill-fated romance started and wondered how I could have been so foolish. A Turk is sworn to protect and to kill, not to love. We are not meant to love our clients, ourselves, anyone, really. Or, at least that's how it was when I was Turk.

Nowadays, in the recent chapter of the Turks, there have been several romances amidst their ranks. Maybe it is their youth…who knows? But I should not have fallen in love with Lucrecia.

I blame myself for her death. I blame myself far too much, as Yuffie says.

Yuffie…it is intriguing how often she is on my mind, in my heart, recently.

As I said: I have only ever loved two women. I thought, as I languished alone in my coffin for thirty years, that I would die without love, and accept my punishment for what happened to Lucrecia. But apparently, that was not my fate. For too soon, light penetrated my darkness and I met the strangest group of people, a group named "AVALANCHE".

And SHE was in the group. Yuffie Kisaragi, a self-proclaimed ninja princess, vanquisher of evil, and collector (thief) of Materia. At first, I paid little attention to the girl…she was young and rash, and I was too old to deal with her. But after the Jenova War and the events of Deepground…something changed. Maybe it occurred after she saved me, or maybe it was long before that, I do not know.

But suddenly the bratty ninja was the light in my life and seemed to chase my demons away, merely with her smile and humor.

And I fell in love.

Not the type of "falling in love" that occurs in pathetic romance movies, or even when I fell in love with Lucrecia. When I fell in love with Lucrecia, I was young and foolish, with no idea what love meant or what could happen. But with Yuffie, I was so much older, more experienced, and a good deal more jaded. While she was ready to rush headlong into nearly anything, I held back and we took everything slowly.

I did not want to corrupt the little ninja. Why should a beautiful, young girl fall for an old ex-Turk whose heart had been broken one time too many? Why would she bind herself to a demon?

Heh. I told her that once. I believe I will always remember the pain of her slap, and the harsh ring of her words as she cursed me for all I was worth, shouting that I was no more a demon then Aerith (a saint, in her eyes) or even herself. I was touched, and realized then Yuffie had already made up her mind.

… I had made up my mind.

Now, I gaze down at my Yuffie every night, every morning…for she is truly mine. With Lucrecia, I did many things wrong but I swore I would do everything right for Yuffie.

Till the day I die, I'll remember how beautiful Yuffie looked, clad in a white Wutaian dress, the very dress her mother wore on her own wedding day. As she walked down the aisle, holding on to her father's arm, her eyes aglow with peace, I realized I could never love anyone so much as she.

I would never love again, except with Yuffie…I would never want another.

Just the other day, I was reading a letter Yuffie sent to me on a recent trip back to her homeland. I wished to go with her, but she convinced me to stay and look after our child…she said we needed some quality time together. Of course, my beloved wrote me every day, and I read over each letter carefully.

And as I was reading over her letter, absently I searched through my old oak desk, pulling out another letter.

This letter was so much older, yellowed with age, and filled with bittersweet memories. It was the last letter Lucrecia ever wrote…a letter written when our love began to test the world around, and in doing so the world tested our love.

Placing the two letters on the desk, I looked them over, a smile part bittersweet, part peace lighting my pale face.

Lucrecia and Yuffie…how different these two women are, and yet I have loved them both with all my heart. Even their letters were different.

Lucrecia's handwriting had always been so very neat and tiny, just like the woman. And her language had always been formal and gentle, the picture of the perfect lady, as I always thought.

One might comment that her letters were just as her life had been: Tidy and formal, yet with gentility written between the lines, and a painful ability for foresight.

Now, Yuffie's letters were as different from Lucrecia's as physically possible. For a princess, her handwriting was sloppy and overdone, with big and small letters, and she had a penchant for dotting her "i"s with smiley faces and hearts. Her language was far less formal, as she used obscure nicknames (After five years of marriage, I still can't get her to stop calling me "Vinny") and…interesting, often misspelled words and slangs.

I suppose it reflected her perfectly: wild, impatient, klutzy, and yet adorable.

Both women were so different and yet I have loved them both. And as I stared down at Lucrecia's letter, I realized something for the first time. The last time she wrote to me, she ended the letter far differently than she normally did.

"I wish you peace, Vincent. And I hope that we both may find something to make us happy."

As I said: A painful ability for foresight. I suppose, looking back, Lucrecia knew what was to come, at least in a way. Therefore, she knew that, while we loved freely and deeply, we were not destined to be together forever, as we had planned.

With a painful smile, I glance at Yuffie's letter and how she signed off.

"Well, My Lord Vampire husband, I better split 'fore dad blows a gasket! Kiss Stinky (her personal nickname for our infant daughter…heh) for me! Love, love, and more Love…Yuffie."

"Well, Lucrecia," I whispered in the dark, as I leaned back in my chair, allowing my eyes to shut. "We were not meant to be, but I suppose it worked out for the best in the end. And we both found "something to make us happy". You have finally returned to the Lifestream and are with your son, and I have found true love and light in the darkness."

I smiled as I thought of Lucrecia, happy and at peace at last, somewhere far above, circling in the ever-present Lifestream.

She was happy, finally, and I was at peace.

No more regret, no more darkness. The sinner has found his redemption, and the princess has found her prince. I suppose the handwriting had been on the wall long ago, but I never noticed.

Now, I read it every day…only it is not the handwriting of the formal lady who had been my first love.

Oh, no. It is the writing of a ninja princess, who had a fondness for shouting, dotting her i's with smiley faces, and turning demons into angels.

My Yuffie.

Author's Note:

Just a short, semi-fluffy thing I wrote after reading a prompt (her handwriting) on Livejournal. Let me know what ya'll think!