I own nothing! It all belongs to the Mouse...although I would definitely love Norrington beneath my Christmas Tree this year...*nudge nudge* Oh fine...
Ways to Drive Commodore James Norrington Insane
1.) Paint out The Dauntless and fill it in with The Black Pearl.
2.) Put pink ribbons in his wig.
3.) Switch his uniform with that of a Marine's.
4.) Give his uniform to either Murtogg or Mullroy.
5.) Call him Commodore Norrykins, and other names of that nature.
6.) When he acts all high and mighty, go up to him and ask, "Does it hurt?" When he asks what on earth you are talking about, say, "The stick up your bum."
7.) Every time he walks by, wrinkle your nose and mutter, "Ew, what's that smell?"
8.) Disable the rudder chain. Enough said.
9.) Scream out, "Look! There's a boy in the water!"
10.) Act like Jack.
11.) Paint his nails and do his make up when he falls asleep at his desk while filling out reports.
12.) Switch everything around on(and in) his desk.
13.) Write CAPTAIN JACK SPARROW WUZ HEER on every available surface.
14.) Hand him a letter stating that Gillette has run away with Groves, and they wish him to be both Maid of Honour and Best Man at the wedding.
15.) Tell him they plan on naming their first child after him.
16.) Continuously make comments about said child, and his two subordinate officers.
17.) Remark on the different shades of red his face is turning, and say you never knew it was possible for a human to successfully do that without their head exploding.
18.) Scatter bottles of rum all over his office.
19.) Ask if his wig has become attached to his head, or if he was born that way.
20.) Wonder why he has to wear high heels when he's already tall, then remark that it does make him look pretty.
21.) Switch his tea with rum when he's not looking, and then watch his expression when he realises what it really is he's knocking back.
22.) Put ink in his coffee.
23.) Take a bit of cloth, and rip it a bit every time he walks, then giggle when he stops.
24.) Ask him if his stockings are too tight, and is that why he always looks like he's in pain.
25.) Switch all his clothes with gowns, and tell him his coats have more fabric in them than what you've replaced them with, so it really shouldn't be much of a difference.