This is just a little one-shot inspired by a line in one of the recent episodes. Hope you like it.
'You'd have to get a girlfriend first'
Mickey had smiled and laughed the comment off, had tried to ignore the stabs of pain he felt inside at the comment, made by someone who didn't even know him. Then he had gone to the pub with them, he hadn't stayed long. An hour in and he had made his excuses and left, Terry watching him leave thoughtfully.
He had been planning on going home and drowning his sorrows, but he ended up in church. The church where he was supposed to get married to the woman that he loved, the woman that he had trusted his heart with, confided his darkest thoughts in. She had betrayed him, had made him look stupid, had treated his heart like a toy. He had chased her through the very church that he was sitting in, asked her why she had done it. The truth was she hadn't trusted him with her problems, had thought him too fragile to handle them.
Mickey fingered the cross around his neck and looked around the church. He had always been strong in his beliefs, had always been faithful. That stopped when Kate died, the cross had been locked away, he had stopped going to church. He had loved Kate, but she hadn't loved him back, looking back he realised that she had toyed with his affections, enjoyed the attention he had given her. He didn't blame her for that, but he blamed her for sleeping with Chandler. Most of all he blamed himself for being naïve, for not listening when his friends told him to give up on her.
The cross had come back out when his Mum had died, when Delaney had taken everything else on him. Mickey had rediscovered and held onto his faith, a few months later he had met Liz. Had refused to even go out for a drink with her for months after that. Then he had let his guard down and had been hurt again.
If anything Mia's betrayal had been even worse. Mickey had been attracted to her instantly, but had been wary. Then Jack had spoken to him, had encouraged him to go for it and he had. He had messed it up first, had spent a night with someone whose name he couldn't even remember now. He had behaved badly, but there had been reasons, it was part of the self destructive path that he had been on for…, he wasn't sure how long. But then he explained to her, told her about Delaney and about Liz. She had promised that she would never hurt him like that, had known how much it would damage him if she hurt him. Yet she had still gone ahead and slept with his boss. She had asked for forgiveness but Mickey couldn't give it.
Carrie had kissed him while he was with Mia, and he had felt something, but there was too much history, too much connecting Carrie to Delaney. It wasn't her fault; she was the only one who couldn't help it.
Mickey stood up and left the church, sitting in his car his phone began to ring. He looked at the caller ID, Jack Meadows. With a slight sigh he hit the accept button and waited for Jack to speak.
"Mickey, are you okay? Terry rang and said I might want to speak to you."
"Yeah Guv, I'm fine."
"Where are you?"
"Church." There was a silence at the other end then Mickey heard a small sigh.
"Look Mickey, go home, I'll meet you there, I need to talk to you." Mickey shook his head, and then smiled, knowing that he had at least one person who cared.
"Yeah, okay. Guv?"
"Yeah Mickey."
"Thanks." Mickey hung up, leaving the reason for his thanks unspoken. There was no need to tell Jack how grateful he was, the DCI already knew, the same as he knew when Mickey needed him, when Mickey was starting to self destruct, and when Mickey was in love. Pulling out of the parking space Mickey stuck the radio on and smiled as he heard the lyrics to the song, they made him realise that he should just stop looking for the perfect person and that he should just take life as it comes.
Maybe who you're looking for is...Somebody in the next carSomebody on the morning trainSomebody in the coffee shopThat you walk right by everydaySomebody that you look at but never really seeSomewhere out thereThere's somebody
The song is 'Somebody' by Mark Wills.