Cookie

by Grayzeek

Can't our heroes experience a rite of passage, just once?

The three of them stood in the tiny kitchenette of Joe's trailer, staring somewhat guiltily at the container in Ryu's hand.

It held one solitary chocolate chip cookie.

"We have to leave it for Joe," Jun said decisively. "We shouldn't have eaten the others without asking him first, anyway."

"I say we share it since he doesn't eat cookies. Besides, he knew we were hungry: if he didn't want us eating them, he would have said something before he left." Ken leaned back on the counter. "After all, he remembered to tell us not to touch his coffee maker!"

"Ken, we should have known not to! They were obviously homemade and Valentine's Day was only two days ago!" Jun argued, her large eyes troubled. "Some girl went to a lot of trouble to make them for him, and you know what that means."

"You mean that baloney about giving a handmade Valentine to the person you're interested in?" Ken snorted. "If she knew Joe well enough to give him a gift then she would know him well enough to know if he was interested in her. And I see no sign of a feminine touch here, do you?" He gestured around at the interior of the trailer.

"Doesn't matter who made them or why they gave them to Joe, or even why he accepted them." Ryu carefully replaced the lid. "I agree with Jun. Majority rules, so he gets the last one."

"Says the man who ate two!"

Ryu drew himself up and looked dismissively at his commander through hooded lids. "That's because I'm twice the man you are," he said with mock contempt.

"Only in tonnage," shot Ken, nimbly avoiding Ryu's half hearted swipe. "But I give in! It's Joe's cookie, even though we all know he won't eat it. Besides, he should be back soon with real food."

"I wonder what he's managed to find? There's nothing open at this hour." Ryu put the transparent container back on the bench where he had found it.

Jun crossed to the wardrobe, opened the door and pushed the few hanging clothes to one side. "Joe's resourceful. He'll find something." She passed a folded deck chair to Ken without looking. "I'm so hungry I would consider cooking!"

"I'm so hungry I would consider eating your cooking!" Ken answered teasingly, passing the chair along to Ryu. Her caustic reply was lost in the clatter of wood against wood and Ken wisely chose not to ask her to repeat it.

"I wish Jinpei hadn't mouthed off at Hakase," Ryu sighed wistfully. "He would have been able to whip something up at the Snack..."

"He was so tired he wouldn't have been able to whip anything up – even if we had more in the fridge than the tomatoes I know have gone yucky by now," Jun muttered, turning with a chair in each hand.

Ken relieved her of the chairs, handing one to Ryu. "Tiredness is no excuse for what he said. He was being a smartarse and Hakase was right in confining him to base for the night to think things over."

"Jinpei would be out like a light by now, Ken. He won't be thinking anything over." Ryu yawned. "If Joe hadn't promised food, I would have stayed the night on base too." The big man turned and stepped down out of the open door followed by Ken and Jun, each carrying a chair.

A few minutes were spent in silence as they struggled with the furniture, finally arranging the four chairs in a semi circle around the fire already burning merrily in the small fire pit.

Sitting down, Jun looked at their surroundings. "Why did Joe move out here?"

"He said he wanted some peace and quiet. I don't blame him – this is a pretty place to set up camp for a while," answered Ken, crossing his outstretched legs at the ankles.

"But it's so remote..."

"Hence the peace and quiet..." Ken replied grinning.

"I'm definitely a city girl – I like lights and people around me." Jun rubbed at her arms. "Staying out here would give me the creeps."

"And yet you happily board mecha and kill goons..." Ken chuckled.

"That's different." Jun sighed. "Gosh, I'm tired."

"You and me both, Jun." Ken said, stretching in his chair.

"You and me three," Ryu added, stretching his legs out towards the fire.

"That was one nasty mission, I agree." Ken nodded. "I'm glad it's over and we can relax for a while. I wonder why Joe suggested we come out here instead of hitting the Snack."

"Because he knew there wouldn't be any food there," muttered Ryu.

"And even if there were, there wouldn't be anyone to cook it," Ken answered quietly, sniggering.

Jun looked at him strangely. "You're not that funny."

"What?"

"You're smiling."

"Yes..?"

"You're not that funny."

"It's funny that you would happily jump onto a mecha, but find this creepy." Ken gestured around them, hoping he could sneak the subject change past her. A tired and grumpy Swan was not the best person to tease about her cooking.

"Not that funny."

"But you have to admit it's a little funny. You aren't a scaredy cat when it comes to beating the hell out of armed and trained soldiers trying to kill you, but you're creeped out by wilderness."

Jun slowly nodded. "But look, it's just all trees and stuff..." She gestured vaguely, nodding.

"But it's just trees and stuff..." Ken smirked: his ploy had been successful. He turned to Ryu. "Don't you think it's a little funny?"

"Huh?" Ryu looked at Ken with bleary eyes.

"Don't you think it's funny that Jun's creeped out by trees and stuff when blood-thirsty goons don't scare her?"

Ryu started to chuckle. "Yeah, that's funny..."

"See, Jun? It is funny." Ken beamed.

Jun nodded.

Ryu chuckled.

Ken reached out and patted her arm. "'Sides, Joe will be back soon. He'll tell you there's nothing to be creeped out by. He's been here for a couple of weeks now. He would know. It's just trees and stuff."

"Yeah," Jun nodded. "It is funny. Yep. Funny." She threw back her head and laughed before suddenly stopping, her head still tilted at an extreme angle backwards. "Ooooooh. Pretty."

Ken swung his heavy head towards her. "Huh?"

She pointed at the night sky. "Pretty. That's really pretty."

Ken tilted his head back until it was at the same odd angle as hers. "Yeah, that is pretty."

Ryu copied their action until he too was looking directly up. "Pretty." He sighed. "And sparkly."

"No wonder Joe likes it out here. What a view," Ken murmured. "Pretty."

"And sparkly," added Ryu.

Jun nodded, back still back, mouth slightly open. "Glittery."

"Yes. Glittery," Ryu agreed.

"And sparkly." Ken chuckled.

"Pretty and sparkly and glittery," said Ryu solemnly. "And twinkly."

"Definitely twinkly." Jun nodded slightly.

"Pretty and sparkly and glittery and twinkly," Ken listed. "Definitely."

They lapsed into a comfortable silence for a few moments, admiring the clear night sky.

"They have to be twinkly or the song would be wrong," Ryu mused.

"The song?" Jun's head bobbed in sudden understanding. "'Twinkle, twinkle little star'?"

"Yep. That one. If they weren't twinkly then it would be wrong, wouldn't it?"

"Yep." Ken nodded. "But 'sparkle, sparkle little star' would work just as well. Has the same amount of syllables and means the same."

"But it wouldn't sound right," Jun disagreed. "Sparkle, sparkle little star. How I wonder what you are..." She stopped. "What's the next line?"

Ken snorted. "Up above the world so high... Oh, um. Ryu?"

"Don't look at me, I don't know. Ends in 'sky', though." Ryu sighed. "But it would be so nice to be up with them, wouldn't it? I'd love to fly among the stars..."

"That would be cool," Jun nodded, her eyes far away.

"Yeah..." Ken pulled his head forward with difficulty. "Whoa, head rush."

"Huh?" Jun and Ryu both turned towards him, their heads still angled to watch the stars.

"Head rush. When I moved my head."

"Oh," Ryu grunted and followed suit, groaning as he fought to bring the heaviness of his skull back to its usual vertical position. "Cool." He giggled. "Head rush."

Ken laughed.

"Ken?" Jun said, her tone worried.

"Yeah?"

"Help me? I can't seem to lift my head."

Ken and Ryu both reacted with roars of laughter.

"It's not funny," insisted Jun. "Help me, dammit."

Ken reached over and lifted her head with his left hand. Her forward momentum stopped only when her nose was inches from her knees. "Whoa." Jun giggled.

"Head rush!" chorused Ken and Ryu, snickering.

Jun pushed herself upright, her body slightly rocking with the effect. "I must be exhausted – I feel so heavy!"

"You and me both," Ryu said, staring into the flames of their campfire. "But I don't feel sleepy anymore."

Ken's brows met in concentration. "No, neither do I. My body's tired, but I'm not sleepy either. We must have got our second wind."

"I'm on my third or fourth. That mission was a bitch," Jun muttered, still rocking slightly.

Ken and Ryu whipped their heads around to stare at her.

"Did she just say what I think she said?" Ryu asked Ken quietly.

"Uh huh," Ken answered as he turned his head to look at Ryu. The second their eyes met, the men burst out laughing.

"What's so funny?" Jun queried, eyebrows scrunched.

"You said 'bitch'!" Ryu chortled.

"So?"

"You don't talk like that!"

Jun mulled this over for a moment, rocking slightly while studying Ryu through half closed eyes. "So, if you thought it was funny because I said 'bitch', you'd wet yourself if I said 'fuck', right?"

"JUN!" Ken exclaimed, shocked by Jun's deliberate crassness. He looked at Ryu to gauge his reaction and found the pilot slumped over the side of his chair at a dangerous angle and howling in glee.

"She said – she said - Haaaaaaaaaa!" The big guy was gasping for breath and slapping his knee.

Ken chuckled at Ryu's display of amusement. Swinging his head back to Jun, he said, "You certainly tickled his funny bone."

She ignored him; instead she was focused on the dancing fire.

"Jun? Jun!" Ken reached out and tapped her arm.

"Huh?"

"Are you okay? Ryu's having a conniption attack that you caused and you're vagued out, ignoring it."

"I'm just tired, Ken. That mission was a bitch."

"So you said."

"Did I? Hmpf." Jun frowned. "I feel kind of weird."

"What kind of weird? Sick weird?"

"No. Heavy weird."

"That's understandable, you said it yourself - you're tired." Ken patted her arm comfortingly.

"My brain's heavy, too." Jun looked at Ken with wide eyes. "And I can feel it rocking in my head."

"Rocking in your head?" Pat, pat, pat. "You mean your brain is rocking?"

"Yeah, rocking. It's like I'm on a Ferris wheel, only going sideways." Her tone became musing. "Kinda makes sense when you think about it. There's that sac of liquid stuff between your brain and your skull to protect it when you move suddenly. I can feel my brain swimming in it."

Ken chuckled. "Nah – it's just the blood rushing back to your head after holding it strangely. You were looking up for longer than we were, makes more sense that you're just experiencing a longer head rush."

"Yeah, suppose you're right..." Jun frowned again. "Ken?"

"Yes?"

"Why are you patting my arm?"

Ken stared at his hand. Pat, pat, pat. With some effort he switched the off the action and moved his hand back to the arm of his chair. "I'm feeling kinda weird myself. We just must be dead tired, that's all."

"Yeah. That mission was a bitch."

The sound of an engine purring at high speed caught Ken's attention. "I think Joe's back."

"I hope he's brought food," said Ryu, wiping the tears from his eyes.

"ARRRRRRGHHHH!" Ripped from three throats as the beam from the car's headlights washed over them and stabbed into their eyes.

Coming to a stop just the other side of the campfire, Joe hopped out of the driver's seat. He looked at the three people blinking rapidly, rubbing at their eyes. Shaking his head, he smirked. "I thought you would be smart enough not to look directly at the headlights. Guess I was wrong."

He moved to the boot and raised it. Looking in, he deliberated for a moment. Joe snagged a grocery bag and resolutely slammed the lid on the rest of the contents.

"The only thing I could find open was a convenience store, so I grabbed some bread, cheese and ham. I also got milk and sugar for those cretins who insist on sullying their coffee." He crossed to the door of his trailer. "It's not much, but it'll take the edge off."

Ryu struggled out of his deck chair. "It's food. I'll give you a hand."

"Need any help from us?" Jun called.

"Nah, we'll cope," Ryu answered as he stepped up. "If there's a way to fuck up a sandwich, Jun would find it," he said in an aside to Joe, smiling broadly.

Joe didn't even smirk. He only reached out and picked up the container holding the cookie. The look on his face was stony.

"We were going to confess about that," Ryu said, biting his lip. "We left you one..."

"It's okay," Joe said quietly. "I planned on sharing them with you guys anyway, but I was going to explain first. I guess I forgot to put them away before I left this morning."

"They were just sitting there..."

"It's okay, Ryu." Joe put down the container and started to unpack the paper bag. "Shit."

"Joe, we're sorry."

"Ryu, it's okay." Joe turned and faced the big man, half smiling. "I forgot to get butter, that's all. Here, you make the sandwiches and I'll start the coffee."

"It's really okay about the cookies?"

"Yes, Ryu, it's really okay about the cookies." Joe fussed with his coffee maker. "Who ate two?"

"Um, me.."

"Oh, that's a relief. I'm glad it wasn't Jun." Joe bit his lip as he realised what he had said. "So, did you find any other food around here that I'd forgotten about?"

"Nah. We should have gone to my place; I've got fish in the freezer and some rice." Ryu deftly laid out slices of ham on the bread. "All you have is coffee and beer. And homemade cookies..." He smirked at Joe's sudden stillness. "Are you going to tell us who made them for you?"

"Just a girl at the track. She made some for all the drivers." Joe answered slowly, letting out the breath he had been holding.

"Oh, so not just for you..." Ryu's tone held disappointment.

"Nope." Joe opened a cupboard above his head and pulled out four mugs. "She's the girlfriend of one of the other drivers."

Ryu sighed. "You know that living vicariously through you would be a lot more fun if you were more willing to talk about your love life, don't you?"

"I keep telling you to go out and get one of your own, Ryu. If you choose to continue believing I'm some man-whore, that's up to you." Joe smirked. "But don't think you can guilt me into telling you all the juicy bits."

"But there are juicy bits, right?" Ryu giggled and looked around. "Got a cutting board for the cheese?"

Joe handed him a square wooden board from the dish rack. "Knives are in that drawer by you." He stopped and took a good look at Ryu. "On second thought, maybe I should deal with the cheese. You don't look like you're seeing too well."

Ryu nodded. "It's the strangest thing. It's like it's too bright in here."

"Tiredness will do that to you. Go and sit down, I'll finish up."

"You've been up just along as we have, Joe," Ryu argued.

"But I haven't stopped yet. I dropped you off and then went shopping. You three have been sitting out by the fire – it's allowed the tiredness to set in."

"You've got a point, I suppose. Are you sure?"

"Yes, Ryu. I work better in my own kitchen on my own. Won't be long." Joe waved him out as he opened the cutlery drawer to extract a knife.

Slitting the plastic surrounding the cheese he carefully sliced portions and placed them on top of the ham. He was smiling broadly – it had worked out better than he had planned. Joe listened intently to the murmurs he could hear through the open door from around the fire. The topic currently at hand was the last mission and Jinpei's confinement on base for insubordination. He couldn't help but chuckle at the memory of the little squirt yelling at the top of his lungs. The language the kid used was inventive - and not entirely uncalled for in his opinion -- but Jun was not impressed and no doubt she was planning to use some of that language on him later. And that was only about the kid using words he may have overheard a certain Condor say...

"Here you go, food as promised," Joe said, stepping out of the trailer, holding several makeshift sandwiches in his hands. He doled them out while taking careful note of the condition of his teammates. "Coffee's ready as well, give me a minute to go get it."

Joe chewed on a sandwich as he poured, sugared and stirred. The knife and cutting board already washed up and air drying on the draining rack, he added the rinsed spoon before collecting the mugs together by their handles and carefully manoeuvring his way out the door.

He offered each mug to its intended recipient, aware of who preferred sugar and milk and in what amounts. Returning to his own chair he picked up the clear container he had furtively deposited on the seat and sat down. Placing it on his lap, Joe removed the half sandwich he had transported clamped between his teeth and resumed eating it while putting his own coffee mug on the ground by the legs of his chair.

"I don't think I've ever had a simple ham and cheese sandwich that tasted this good," Jun said around a mouthful.

"Everything tastes better when you're hungry," agreed Ken before finishing the last bite. "That seriously hit the spot."

Joe nodded while chewing the last of his sandwich. "It's a shame we got in so late. We could've had a proper barbeque if we could've got the stuff for it."

"I don't think I could have waited long enough for anything to cook – I was starving." Ken shifted in his seat.

"Apparently you didn't wait," Joe said softly, holding the transparent container up for him to see.

"Ah. We were going to explain about that..."

"It would have been better if you had waited until I explained, Ken." Joe sighed. "I accidently left them out, so I blame myself. I should've checked that I had put them away, or at least asked you not to touch them yet. Anyway, what's done is done."

"Joe, we're sorry," Jun said, her eyes pleading. "They're homemade and Valentine's Day was only a couple of days ago and it's obvious that they were made for you and we shouldn't have touched them without asking you first and we feel really bad, but we left you one..." She took a deep breath. "And we really want to know about the girl and are you serious about her? Is she nice? Have you gone on a date that we don't know about? What's her name? Is she pretty? I bet she is - you always seem to pick the pretty ones. When are we going to meet her? Does she know about us? Is she normal, or does she work for the ISO? Oooh, does she know who you are? What does she do? Is she pretty? I bet she is - you do like the pretty ones... What colour is her hair? What about her eyes?" Jun took another deep breath. "Is she Galactor? I don't want to bring it up, but you do seem to pick them... I hope you're not really mad, we didn't mean to do it. Well, we did, but we were so hungry and they were just sitting there and you didn't say not to touch them, but we should have known not to-"

"JUN!!" Joe yelled, waving to get her full attention. "Oh my God! Thank the saints you only ate one!"

"Is she pretty? I bet she is, you always seem to pick them-"

"Jun!" Joe reached out and put his hand over her mouth while holding a finger to his. "Shhh. It's okay; I wasn't the only one to get cookies off this girl."

Jun's eyes widened in disbelief. Pushing his hand away from her face she took a deep breath. "That little tramp! How dare she give out cookies to all and sundry! Doesn't she know how wonderful you are? She would be lucky if you even looked in her direction for more than a split second! I bet she's a dog – she would have to be to hand out homemade cookies to all the guys, just hoping to get a nibble, I reckon. How dare she come sniffing around you! You're too good for her - I hope you showed her the door quick smart! I need to find her and set her straight! I'm going to go ninja on her slutty arse!"

"JUN!!" Joe bellowed as she struggled to stand. Quickly thinking, Ken retrieved her coffee cup from by her foot before she could knock it over while Joe restrained her by the arm.

"Let me go, Joe! I'm gonna hunt that little maggot down and slap her stupid!"

"Jun! It's okay – the cookies meant nothing like that – they weren't even for Valentine's Day! Goddammit, sit down and stay down!"

"Joe?" Ken asked tentatively as Joe glared at the irate Swan who was still muttering threats and trying to stand. "Um, were they what I think they were? I mean Jun's got a serious case of verbal diarrhoea going on and she's way too easy to distract..."

Joe raised a doubtful eyebrow at his leader as he fought to keep Jun in her seat. Ken responded by tapping Jun on the shoulder and then pointing upwards.

"Look, Jun, pretty."

Jun followed his movement with her eyes until she let her head fall back.

"Oh, pretty..."

Joe burst out laughing as he released Jun's arm. "I see what you mean and, yes, they are what you think. I meant to tell you before you ate them, but, well..."

"Joe! How could you...? Oh my God..." Ken stared at him in shock. "You were going to offer them to us??"

Joe twisted off the plastic lid of the container. Pulling out the final cookie, he looked up at the two white faces staring at him and then glanced at Jun's profile still staring upwards. "Yep," he said and then took a bite.

"Whoa..." Ryu murmured. "Now I understand why you were worried that Jun had eaten two – if she's like that after eating just one" -- he gestured towards the Swan in question still lost among the stars, -- "then it would've been bloody hilarious to see her after two!"

"Ryu!" Ken whipped around to face the pilot. "You're condoning this??"

"As Joe said, Ken – what's done is done." Ryu sat back and folded his hands over his stomach. "We should know better than to eat food we find in Joe's trailer without asking its history first. We brought this on ourselves."

Ken sputtered for a moment, flailing for a reasonable response before sighing in resignation. "Yep, you're right. It's not like Joe force fed them to us and he was going to tell us before we ate them... It's just..."

"They are so against the rules and if Hakase found out he would skin us alive?" Ryu supplied helpfully. "Ken, sometimes you really need to remember you're an adult and can make decisions about your life on your own. Most people experiment with stuff like this, usually before they're your age. Just consider tonight as a way of being normal for a change."

Joe chewed thoughtfully. "Ryu, I couldn't have said it better myself. You just missed the part about it doing him good to just go with the flow for once."

"And to let loose, cut up and just enjoy what life has to offer..." Ryu added. "Of course, I'm not sure I would have accepted any cookies off of you knowing what they were. But what's done is done."

"But what if we get called out? There is no way we could go on a mission now!"

"Ken," Ryu sounded a little impatient. "We just finished a mission – even if Galactor attacked right this minute, there is no way that Hakase would send us out. He knows we need time to recover, so why don't you sit back and relax? It'll do you good to let your hair down and do something that isn't exactly-"

"Legal?!" Ken blurted.

"Well, I was going to say 'Hakase-approved' but that'll do just as well," Ryu chuckled. "I guess you would have said no."

"Damn straight!"

"Then it's just lucky you scoffed one without knowing what it was, huh?" Ryu smirked. He leant forward so he was looking directly at Joe. "If I didn't know you better I would say you planned it this way, but you're not that much of a bastard – regardless of how much you try to be."

"I would say thank you but I wouldn't be sure why," Joe answered wryly. "I was going to tell you what they were and hope that you would be open to experiencing something different. Jinpei getting grounded for mouthing off was too good an opportunity to waste."

Ken stared hard at his second for a moment. "Have you done this before?"

"I take it you mean indulged in general versus asking three of my best friends over to sit around a campfire while we eat sandwiches?" At Ken's sardonic nod, Joe continued, "Yes. A few times, in fact. And no, I have never compromised a mission. I've always been very careful with my timing – and I don't do chemicals under any circumstances, herbal is far enough for me."

"Too far-"

"Joe, I think one cookie was not enough. I don't suppose you have any more so we can hold him down and shove it down his throat?" Ryu looked sternly at Ken who was staring at him in surprise. "You need to get that stick out of your arse, Ken. Sorry, but it's true. You were starting to relax before you knew what was happening and somehow you have managed to shake off the effects to get all uptight again. Look at Jun – she's totally lost in her thoughts and by that smile on her face she's having fun. I'm not sure what the arm movements are supposed to be, but if she wants to wave them around like that then at least she's currently not ashamed to do it. Personally, I'm feeling pretty damn good and I intend to enjoy it while it lasts. And before you get even more uptight, I don't plan on making this a habit. As I said, I don't think I would've agreed to eat a single crumb if I had known what they were. But what's done is done and I can look at this without a single smidgen of guilt because it wasn't done on purpose by either me or Joe."

"Wow. Is that the longest speech I've ever heard from you?" Joe asked, chuckling. "It's certainly the most intelligent!"

"Probably is. Usually I feel stupid when I'm around you guys so I don't speak up, and when I do it doesn't always come out the way I mean."

"You feel stupid?" Ken looked at the big man in surprise.

"It doesn't help that someone who will remain nameless-" Ryu shot a pointed look at Joe, "always tells me that I at least sound stupid. And the only one of you that takes me seriously, that takes the time to listen to me, is the kid. Are you really surprised that I feel that way?"

Ken and Joe shared a look before Joe looked away. Ken cleared his throat and turned his attention to the man on his right. "Ryu, I'm sorry you feel that way and I'm sure that Joe does too. You're right, this situation is of no one's doing, it was just a series of misfortunate events."

"So you're just going to sit back and enjoy what fate has dumped into your lap, aren't you?"

"Well, it's too late to do anything else..." Ken chuckled. "And given that Joe just ate the last cookie, I'm not going to get into a car with him, so unless I want to spend the next five hours walking home I don't have any other choice than to sit back and see it through."

"It's not like we don't have any entertainment." Ryu indicated Jun, who was still staring at the stars and waving her arms. She had added a side-to-side rocking motion and the look on her face was far away and dreamy.

"I wonder where she is right now," Joe said, sitting back and getting comfortable.

"She said that she could feel her brain rocking," Ken answered, concern colouring his voice. "Is that normal?"

"Can't say I've ever had the experience, but it's different for different people. I have no idea how it's going to affect you, for example, even though we're both males and similar in size. But I don't think we need to worry about Jun at the moment." Joe shrugged. "She seems to be enjoying herself."

"You know she's going to kick your arse when she realises what's happened, right?" Ken settled further into his chair.

"She's going to kick my arse anyway, Ken. It's not like I can disown the she-goat comment Jinpei made – she's heard me say it often enough."

"Not to mention that it was in Italian," Ryu added. "I wish I had his knack of picking up languages. That kid's a sponge."

"He's a kid, it's natural," Ken said. "His brain's designed to collect information faster than ours."

"Nah, Ryu's right. Jinpei has a gift for languages. I know how hard it was for me to learn Japanese when I was a kid and I had teachers helping me out. Jinpei can put sentences together using stuff he's heard me say but take it completely out of the context. It's like he just knows what sounds right." Joe sighed. "Lucky little shit. It would have made my life so much easier."

"You could have made your life so much easier if you had just accepted that you were going to learn it whether you liked it or not," Ken muttered. "You were the little shit. We all know your favourite curses because you yelled them at us often enough. And once you had learned to translate them into Japanese..." Ken rolled his eyes.

"Do you remember Hakase's face when he realised that he wasn't the only one that understood Joe's ranting because for once it wasn't in Italian?" Ryu laughed. "I thought he was going to have a heart attack!"

"He certainly went red enough." Ken chuckled. "He had let him go on because he thought we couldn't understand what he was saying. All of a sudden it clicked and bamm! I'd never seen him move so fast... Or so speechless!"

"Glad you enjoyed it," Joe muttered uncomfortably. "You weren't the one that got punished."

"I wasn't the one mouthing off! You brought it on yourself – you should've just sucked it up and done the exercise he wanted you to do."

"I was tired! We had been training for ages, Ken! It was all right for you – once training was over you were getting the rest of the day off, but I still had hours of tutoring in front of me." Joe blew out a frustrated breath. "It didn't matter if it was a weekend or not, I didn't get any time to just play like you guys did."

"I used to feel sorry for you, you know," Ryu admitted quietly. "Our lessons were hard enough for me because I had to concentrate on what the teachers were saying. My Sendai dialect was different enough to make it difficult to always understand what they said, but you were working in a completely different language... It didn't surprise me at all that you were a grouchy little bastard."

"Grouchy is a polite way of putting it," Ken threw a look at Ryu. "But Ryu wasn't the only one that knew you were getting a bad deal, Joe."

"Especially when Hakase made you all learn Italian and decided that the best way would be if you couldn't speak anything else for a month." Joe chuckled. "Easiest month of my life."

"For once it was you that got all the free time while we were stuck in tutoring," Ken said ruefully. "We got a fair idea of what you were going through when that happened."

"You all became a lot nicer to me, I remember that. Up until then you had always looked at me as if I was a bomb about to go off."

"You were! We might not have understood the explosion but it was always powerful," Ryu remarked. "Especially when you gave up on trying to make us understand what you were saying and just started pounding our arses."

"You understood what I meant then," Joe said, smirking.

"Nah, we just understood you were frustrated by not being able to explain exactly what you meant. That's why we never ganged up and pounded you completely," Ken chuckled. "We got bloody close to it on occasion."

"Especially when you picked on Jinpei. He was still so young, practically a baby." Jun turned her head to look at Joe. "I forgave you a lot of things, Joe, but I hated you when you picked on Jinpei."

"Oh, look – The Swan has landed!" Ryu chortled.

"I've been here all the time; I just didn't have anything to say." Jun let her arms drop. "Oh, and Joe? I'm gonna kick your arse for getting me stoned."

"Didn't you just say you had been listening in, Jun? Ken and Ryu both agree that you brought it on yourselves for eating cookies you found in my trailer. I am blameless and therefore do not deserve an arse kicking."

"Oh, did I say I was going to kick your arse for the cookies? My mistake." Jun's voice hardened. "I meant I'm going to kick your arse for teaching Jinpei foul words. And being a bad influence. He wouldn't have mouthed off if he hadn't seen you do it so often."

"She's got you there, Joe!" Ken laughed.

"I feel for that kid." Ryu said, musingly. "Look at his role models. On one hand he's got Ken and on the other he's got Joe..."

"I don't see the problem, Ryu." Jun struggled to sit upright, smiling at Ken when he helped her move her head. "For normal people they would just be considered the good conscience and the bad conscience that sit on their shoulders while they make life changing decisions. Jinpei just has real live versions."

"You don't see the problem with that, Jun?" Ryu asked in disbelief. "The kid got confined to barracks because of an attitude he certainly didn't learn from Ken!"

"I would rather him mouthing off at Hakase than haring off on his own like a certain Eagle we know." Jun considered for a moment. "Just totally ignore my earlier idea of them being the good and the bad. It doesn't really fit after all."

"Actually I think you might be onto something with your analogy, Jun. When you look at them, certainly in birdstyle, there are more than a few similarities. The Eagle is light, the Condor is dark. Joe's attitude is confrontational, Ken's is understanding..."

"The Condor kicks arse, the Eagle talks about it..." added Joe, smiling.

"The Eagle gets the job done; the Condor doesn't give a shit as long as he can blow something up..." Ken joined in, smirking.

"The Condor gets the girls, the Eagle gets, well, um..."

"Phone numbers!" Jun exclaimed in glee. "Usually from men – in Galactor uniforms." She collapsed away from Ken's horrified glance, giggling. "What is it with you? Stick a guy in green and gray and he throws himself at you."

"Jun, they're trying to kill me – it's not a romantic rendezvous!"

"That explains the little pieces of paper I see you clean out of your uniform after every mission, does it?" Jun asked, her face delighted at Ken's rapidly reddening discomfort.

"Joe? When does this stuff start to kick in?" Ken asked plaintively.

Joe roared in laughter. "I told you it affects people in different ways. I'm already starting to feel it so you should be humming right along. If you're not then maybe it just doesn't affect you at all." He leant forward. "Tell me, just how do those little pieces of paper make their way into your uniform?"

Ken sputtered for a moment, his mouth working with the turmoil of his thoughts. His eyes narrowed and he smiled brightly as an idea occurred to him. "Look, Joe. Pretty," he said and pointed up.

Joe followed the movement of Ken's finger until he realised what he was doing. "Oi! I'm not that far gone yet!" His exclamation was enough to stop Jun from following Ken's gesture.

"Oh, so soon enough you will be?" Ken asked, his mind locking on that all important 'yet'. Jun looked at Joe with curiosity.

Joe responded with a curse muttered under his breath as he looked at the ground. "You haven't answered my question about the phone numbers, Ken." He returned his gaze to his commander's face, his action mirrored by Jun. "Exactly how do they get into your uniform?"

"How exactly do you hide your gun in civvies, Joe?" Jun followed Ken's gaze back to Joe.

"Off topic, Ken. Answer my question."

Jun turned her head back towards Ken. "Yeah, how do they get into your uniform, Ken?"

Ken blew a frustrated breath. He pointed upwards. "Jun, look-"

"Jun! Look at me!" yelled Joe, waving his hand in front of Jun's face.

"What?!" Jun yelled back, startled.

"Jun, I need you to listen, really listen. Do you understand?" Joe asked, looking deep into her eyes. She nodded. "Under no circumstances are you to look up when Ken tells you, okay?"

"Okay. No looking up." Her eyes wandered over Joe's head. "But the stars are so pretty..."

"Yes, they are," Joe agreed, pulling her focus back to him. "But we really want to know how the phone numbers get into Ken's uniform, don't we?" She nodded again. "Ken is going to try to stop us so we're going to have to work together, understand?"

"Work together, yep. 'Coz we're a team," Jun said solemnly.

"Yep, we're a team. And it's the only way we'll get answers, but we have to stay focused, got it?"

"Stay focused, got it. We're a team."

"We're a team, yep. Got to work together, to get answers."

"Yep, only way, work together, get answers." Jun frowned. "What do we want to know?"

Joe inhaled sharply and ran a hand over his face, ignoring the laughter of Ken and Ryu. "Jun, concentrate. How do phone numbers get into Ken's uniform?" He spoke slowly and clearly.

"That's easy. Goons put them there," Jun answered innocently. "Every mission, more numbers from more goons. Can't be the same one, because we would've killed him a long time ago." She made a dismissive gesture. "That was easy, ask me a harder one – I like quizzes."

Joe bit the inside of his mouth in an attempt to control his frustration. "What part of Ken's uniform do goons put numbers into?"

"Um, belt I think. And maybe cowl. You know, the parts that they can get to. Like his belt." Jun started suddenly. "Oh, and if he gets captured, it's like watching him pull confetti out of his uniform. Especially from his belt."

Joe smirked at Ken over Jun's grave face. "Well done, Jun. Do you think he lets them get close enough to put the paper in his belt on purpose?"

"I do NOT!" roared Ken, eliciting a startled 'eep!' from Jun as she spun around to face him, rocking her chair dangerously.

Instinctively both Ken and Joe reached out and steadied the chair, preventing Jun from falling.

"Sorry, Jun. I didn't mean to scare you." Ken patted her arm apologetically.

"That's okay," answered Jun as she settled herself back into her chair. She turned suddenly to look at Ken. "It's your turn."

"My turn? For what?"

"Next question," Jun said, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. "And you can stop patting my arm now."

"Oh." Ken pulled his hand away. "Um, well, I do like my question about how Joe hides his gun when he's in civvies. His reputation alone would suggest that many a girl has gotten close enough to feel it through his trouser leg."

"Oh, that's easy. He simply says 'I'm either wearing a gun or I'm happy to see you'." Jun looked up at Ken through lowered lashes. "He lets them decide which." She put her forefinger on her bottom lip. "Of course, my question would be how does he decide if they're correct or not. But I think that might have to do with how lucky he thinks he's going to get with them – and how soon. I wouldn't mind knowing how he explains the shuriken, though."

"I don't," Joe said mildly. "That I carry a concealed weapon is worrying enough for most people. If they knew I carried a bunch of feathers, too, I would probably find myself locked up."

"Not just scary, but freaky too?" asked Jun, head tilted.

"Something like that."

"Sounds about right." Ken muttered.

"Anyway." Joe glared at him. "You should know how I hide my gun. You have your boomerang in your pocket. How do you explain that?"

"He doesn't." Jun looked at Joe through half closed eyes. "He doesn't let girls close enough to find it." She frowned and turned to look at Ken. "You don't let girls come near you and you always end up with a bunch of numbers from goons. Is there something you might want to tell us?"

"NO!" Ken blanched. "I mean there is nothing wrong with being gay, but I'm not."

"You just set off every goon's Gaydar?"

"I guess so," Ken sighed. "Joe, tell me this stuff is going to kick in soon, please!"

"It's kicked in for me..." Joe said, smiling at the fire. "I was told it was good stuff and so far it's living up to it. How're you feeling, Ryu?"

"Pretty damn good, Joe. How about yourself?"

"Damn good, Ryu. How're you feeling, Jun?"

"Damn good. How're you feeling, Ken?"

"Cheated!"

Ryu threw back his head and laughed. "You're disappointed that this stuff doesn't work for you, oh mighty Eagle?"

Ken sighed. "Well, it's not like I did it on purpose so it would be kinda nice if it worked – just so I knew what it was like because it's not like I'm ever gonna have the chance to do it again because I am never gonna eat anything that Joe has been anywhere near without getting it drug tested first. I might even get Hakase to install a drug test kit on the GodPhoenix just so I can check the water before I drink it. Sorry, Joe, but I don't think I'm gonna be trusting you that much anymore. Of course, I do know that you didn't mean to put us in this position and I am grateful that it happened after a mission and at a time it's not likely that Galactor is going to attack, although I agree with Ryu. If they did attack, Hakase wouldn't send us out 'coz he knows we need to rest and relax between missions and only a few hours is not enough." He looked at Ryu's amused face. "What?"

"Dude! You're gone!"

"I'm what?"

Joe chuckled. "You've caught Jun's verbal diarrhoea. You're stoned!"

"I am not. I feel perfectly fine!"

"Ken? Are you still hungry?" Joe asked innocently.

"Starving!"

"You ate two sandwiches fifteen minutes ago. They would've hit your stomach by now, wouldn't they?"

"Well, we didn't have lunch or dinner, so..." Ken's eyes widened as he realised what Joe was implying. "Are you saying I've got the munchies?"

"You could be right about missing lunch and dinner – but I watched you inhale those sandwiches. I know Jun is a far more dainty eater than you, but you beat her and she only had one – and she wasn't being too dainty about eating it either," said Ryu. He clapped a hand on Ken's shoulder. "You've definitely got the munchies!"

"Ken's got the munchies? Cool!" Jun exclaimed, clapping her hands. "That's so not Mr 'I'm the White Shadow' Eagle!"

"You know I'm getting the distinct feeling of mutiny in the ranks."

"Ken, get over it," advised Joe solemnly.

"How can I get over it, Joe? I'm the Commander, for crying out loud! Ryu said I've got a stick up my arse and Jun just called me, well – you heard her!"

"Maybe they're just telling you that you're not the Commander all the time, Ken. Maybe they're telling you that it's all right to relax once in a while." Joe leant towards him. "You're not Mr 'I'm the White Shadow' Eagle twenty four hours a day, Ken. Sometimes you're just our friend and not our Commander. As long as you're our Commander when it counts, Ken - that's all that matters."

Ken stared at him for a moment before letting out a laugh. "You know that you barely made sense at the end there, right?"

Joe shrugged. "Made sense to me."

"You know what doesn't make sense to me?" Jun asked. She turned in her chair to look at Ken. "How can you be the 'White Shadow'? Shadows aren't white. They're black. They're the absence of light. White isn't the absence of light. White is the presence of light. Under no circumstances can a shadow be white because light is white and shadows aren't light, they're the absence of light, therefore they can not be white."

Ken stared at her before looking over her determined face to Joe. "How do I explain that one to her? I mean – she was the one that gave me the name in the first place!"

Joe laughed. "It's a concept that's a little beyond her at the moment so you just distract her." He reached out and tapped Jun's arm. When her blurry eyes found his, he asked, "Are you hungry?"

"Yes! Starving! I think I've got the munchies too..." she admitted, biting her lip. "Got anymore sandwiches?"

"Nope." Her face fell at Joe's negative response. "I've got something better."

"What's better than sandwiches? They were so good!"

"They were good, but I picked up more than ham, cheese and bread when I was at the store," answered Joe. "I hoped you guys would eat the cookies so I'm prepared with perfect munchies food." He stood up and crossed to his car. Pulling his keys out of his pocket he unlocked and raised the boot. "A little help?"

Ken shot out of his seat so fast that it toppled over. Ryu laughed as he righted it again before getting up himself.

"How many hands do you need, Joe?"

"We're fine for now," he answered as he dove into the trunk, pulling out a paper sack and handing it to Ken. "That one has soft drinks in it so don't drop it – it's been rolling around the boot so the drinks will fizz up when we open them. If you drop it, something will probably explode."

"Do you want them in the fridge?"

"Nah – we're going to want liquids soon enough," Joe responded as he snagged another bag. "Just don't put it too close to the fire."

"What's in yours?" Ken asked, trying to sneak a peek.

"Stuff." Joe slammed the trunk.

"Hey – I saw another bag in there!"

"You really must have the munchies if you're worried that two bags isn't enough," chuckled Joe.

"Well, this one's only got drinks in it," answered Ken reasonably.

"I have enough, Ken – don't worry. What's in the trunk is for later." Joe took note of the unconvinced look on Ken's face. "Trust me – it'll be worth waiting for."

"I thought we just covered the whole trust issue," muttered Ken as he carefully walked around the fire back to his seat.

"Joey?" Jun wheedled. "Whatcha got?"

"I have lots of things, Juni, but I'll take it you mean in the bag?" Joe teased, hand poised above the opening.

"Joe, don't be an arse! Give me food, dammit!"

Ryu leant towards Ken, who was ruffling through his own bag. "I think I like Jun in this condition."

Ken chuckled, pulling out a bottle of soda and handing it to the big guy. "She's definitely more vocal about her wants, isn't she? Even drunk, she's not like this."

"You know, I'm thinking that should you want to take advantage of this situation, she wouldn't mind too much – if you get my drift."

Ken stared at Ryu, dumbfounded. "I don't get what you mean..."

"You know, Commander, I often wonder if you're as naive as you seem to be." Ryu's eyes narrowed as he studied the man next to him. "Something makes me doubt it."

"Okay, who wants Onion Rings and who wants Pork Rinds?" Joe held up a couple of foil bags.

"Pork Rinds!" Jun darted forward and snagged a bag from his grip.

"Onion Rings!" Ryu held out his hands for Joe to throw the bag to him.

"Um...?" Ken's head whipped from side to side, watching his teammates tear open the packets.

"It's okay, Ken – I got four of everything." Joe chuckled. "Been here, done this, remember?"

"Well, in that case, I'll take the Onion Rings for starters and then move onto the Rinds later."

Jun looked at him. "Oh, good idea! Joe, I want Onion Rings!" She thrust her open packet in his direction.

"I'll swap you then. I prefer Rings to Rinds," Joe said as he tossed Ken's order his way.

"That doesn't make sense," Jun frowned as she accepted the new packet from him.

"You're leaving the Rinds for desert, I'm leaving the Rings – it's the same thing, Jun."

"Oh, so it is," she giggled, tearing the packet apart.

Joe sat down, placing the paper bag carefully to his left, away from the ravenous Swan.

"Joe?"

"Yes, Ken?"

"If Jun is completely off her rocker-"

"Am NOT!"

"If Jun is so affected by eating one cookie," Ken diplomatically corrected himself in the face of Jun's sudden anger, "why isn't Ryu performing ballet or something? He had two."

"I told you, Ken. It affects people differently for the most part. And Ryu is easily twice Jun's size and so logically it wouldn't affect him as much and as quickly as it did her."

"Oh."

..................

"Did you hear that?"

"Hear what, Ken?"

"It sounded like a footstep – out there."

"I didn't hear anything, did you, Ryu?"

"Huh?"

"I said - did you hear anything? Ken reckons he heard a footstep out there."

"Can't say I did, Jun."

"See, Ken? You didn't hear anything; it's just your imagination – again. Quit being so paranoid."

..................

"Did you hear that?"

"Hear what, Ken?"

"A footstep – out there!"

"You know, you could just go look."

"Joe?"

"I'm not coming with you, Ken."

"Oh."

..................

"Did you hear that?"

"NO!"

..................

"Did you hear that?" Joe looked into the darkness beyond his car.

"Hear what, Joe?" Jun mumbled.

"I thought I heard something – out there."

"Like what?"

"A branch breaking or something. There's no breeze."

"So you reckon something leant on it or something?" Jun frowned.

"Yeah, something like that."

"Want to go look? I'll come with you." Jun sat up straight.

Joe nodded and they both struggled out of their chairs.

Ken watched them silently slip into the trees before looking at Ryu. "Oh, so when Joe hears something it's worthy of investigation. When I hear something it's just paranoia."

"Yep." A deep breath. "Told you I liked Jun in this condition."

"Ryu, just shut up!"

"Makes sense that it could be something, though. Joe's paranoid all the time – he knows how to keep a lid on it. If he says he heard something, then you can guarantee he definitely heard something. Besides, he's been here for a while now, he knows the usual sounds and you don't. It's nothing to get pissy about."

"So, you reckon he's actually heard something?"

"I would bet on it."

"Do you think we should go after them?"

"Ken, do you really want to go into those dark trees, with no light and with two highly trained ninja on the loose that are looking for something suspicious? Remembering their current condition?"

"Good point. They're just as likely to jump on us thinking we're what's out there."

"What do you think it could be?"

"I don't know!"

"Ken?"

"Yes, Ryu?"

"Do you want to go inside?"

"Yes!"

..................

"Where did they go?" Joe looked around at the empty chairs.

"The door to your trailer's closed – I reckon the scaredy-cats are hiding in there."

Joe laughed at Jun's dismissive tone. "The great Gatchaman!"

"You know, Ken was teasing me earlier about finding this place creepy."

"It is creepy," Joe answered as he lifted the trunk of his car.

"If you find it so creepy, why do you stay out here?"

"Jun, I carry a concealed weapon and a bunch of feathers. Do the math."

Jun giggled at Joe's sardonic response. "If you mention anything about duct tape, I'm telling Hakase."

"Nah, he knows about that already," Joe answered, closing the lid after grabbing the last paper bag. He turned and gave her a smile. "As long as I'm discrete when hiding the bodies he keeps the boys in blue off my arse."

"Very funny, grease monkey. Why did you move out here?"

"The trailer park was getting noisy. I don't want to hear everybody else living their lives. Certainly not at the top of their lungs."

"I remember you saying about the couple next door arguing a lot," Jun said with sympathy.

"That's not all they did loudly." Joe kicked dirt over the dying fire.

Jun's eyes widened. "You mean you could hear them... at night too?"

"Yep."

"How embarrassing for them!" she exclaimed with delight.

"I didn't particularly care about their embarrassment, Jun," Joe answered, turning the door handle. "But I like my sleep uninterrupted." He frowned.

"Problem?" Jun asked when the door failed to open.

"Those bastards locked the door!"

"They did what??" Jun pounded on the side of the trailer. "Oi! Open up, you chickens!"

"Jun!" Joe reached out and captured her fist before it could add more dents. "It's my trailer – I have keys!"

She giggled. "Forgot about that."

Joe just smiled at her as he unlocked the door. Opening it, he gestured for Jun to precede him.

Stepping up into the trailer's small room, Jun blinked against the glare of the light. She glanced around, finding her teammates huddled at the table, staring at the door.

"It's only us," she said.

"We can see that." Ken fought to keep the relief out of his voice.

"Did you find something?" Ryu wasn't so able.

"Just an opossum. It was so cute!"

"They're not so cute when they run across the trailer's roof at night," grouched Joe.

"Ah, but are they as noisy as your trailer park neighbours?" asked Jun coyly.

"Yes – they just don't last as long." Joe smirked as she giggled.

"Joe?" Ken asked.

"Yes?"

"What's in the bag?"

"Desert." Joe looked around. "Did you remember to bring in the drinks?"

"Um...."

"It's all right, Joe. These two big, brave men can stay here and I'll go out on my tiny little lonesome into the dark and get our drinks."

"Well, if you're going to put it like that, Jun – thanks!" Ryu answered, sharing a grin with Ken.

They watched over their shoulders as Joe found a large plastic bowl in one of the cupboards. Their interest peaked when he pulled out bags of assorted M&Ms, Marshmallows, Jelly Beans and Malteasers and began emptying them into the bowl.

Jun opened the door and placed four coffee cups on the floor before disappearing again. Ryu got up and without a word, picked them up and took them to the sink. While rinsing one he snuck a glance into the bag.

"Whoa! You've still got stuff in here!"

Joe smiled. "Ryu, the entertainment is about to begin. Just leave the cups in the sink – I'll do them tomorrow."

"But today is tomorrow already, Joe."

"You know what I mean, big guy. Sit down." Joe picked up the bowl and the bag.

Jun closed the door with difficulty, her hands full of large soft drink bottles. She plonked them on the table before climbing into the seat opposite Ken. Ryu resumed his place and Joe put the bowl on the table, in the middle for easy access by all. Sliding in next to Jun, he grabbed a handful of candy.

"Dig in. By now you're all starting to feel really tired. The sugar will help you keep going for a while, but I think you'll be staying here tonight."

"Where are we all going to sleep?" Jun looked around the tiny room.

"I have sleeping bags and the table breaks down and becomes a bed. There's plenty of room, Jun – you're not going to end up on the back seat of my car, don't worry."

Ken nodded. "The only alternative is if Joe's drives us home. If two of us can sit side by side, then the table is big enough for two of us to sleep here."

"My bed's big enough for two as well – as long as one of them is Jun."

"Joe!"

"Jun!" Joe looked at her shocked face. "I'm not suggesting anything. Keep your knickers on!"

"Damn straight I will be!"

"Jun – I didn't mean it like that!" Joe laughed. "I meant that you being smaller would be easier on whoever is in it with you – I didn't say it would be me!"

"Damn straight it won't!"

Ryu raised an eyebrow as he looked at Ken sideways. "I don't know, Jun. Joe's got quite the reputation – aren't you just a little curious about whether it's deserved?"

"NO!"

"Then pick your own bed partner, Jun," Ken said reasonably.

"I'll sleep on the floor," she answered decisively.

"No, you won't." Joe sighed. "It's okay – it won't be the first time I've slept in my car. You take the bed, Ken and Ryu can share the table."

"Joe, I can't have you doing that!" Jun looked at him with her large sea-green eyes.

Joe smirked and leaned over to whisper in her ear. "Not that I would mind sharing my bed with you, but Ryu snores like a train. And my car is more comfortable than it sounds. Trust me – I'm getting the better part of the deal."

"Are you sure?"

"Yep." Joe leant down and pulled the bag to his lap. "It's settled, then. Ken, you and Ryu share the table, Jun gets the bed and I get the back seat of my car."

"I feel so bad that I'm kicking you out of your own bed..."

Ryu looked at Jun. "Or you could let him share it, Jun. It's up to you."

Joe kicked Ryu under the table. "It's already settled, Ryu." He pulled out an oblong box from the bag and gave it to Jun.

"What's this?"

"Something called Kinder Surprises." Another box made its way to Ken.

"I know these! Jinpei spends all his pocket money on them. Chocolate eggs with toys inside."

"You got us toys?" Ken looked at the box in his hand doubtfully.

"Better than just toys, Ken. These ones you have to make yourself," Joe said as he gave a box to Ryu.

"Sweet! There are three of them in here!" Jun exclaimed as she opened the box and carefully removed the foil covered eggs.

Joe folded the bag and threw it over Ryu's head to land on the counter. "Let the fun begin!"

"I don't see why you would consider this fun," Ken muttered as he unwrapped an egg.

"Wait and see. I really hope you get a toy with stickers. Lots of them." Joe grinned evilly.

"Mmmm, this chocolate is divine! No wonder Jinpei won't share any with me," Jun murmured around her mouthful.

"It is good chocolate," agreed Ryu, looking at the little plastic egg he had just shaken from its chocolate prison.

"Wait!" Joe said as Ryu tried to twist the top off. "We have to make a decision and we have to stick with it."

"What about?" Ken looked up from his own examination of a plastic ovum.

"Do we eat all of the eggs before we can open the plastic ones and make the toys, or do we eat all of one egg, then make the toy, eat another egg, etc?"

"Do them one at a time!"

"Do them all at the same time!"

Ken looked at Joe across the table. "You've got more experience here than we do. What's the best way?"

Joe thought for a moment. "This is the first time this has been a group activity for me," he admitted. "But I like the idea of having to eat all of the egg and then doing the toy. And I think we should have to wait until everyone has finished each part before we can continue."

"You make it sound like it's going to be a challenge," Ken said. "These are toys designed for kids to make, not four grown adults with the kind of mechanical experience we've got."

"Ken – you have no idea." Joe shook his head. "Humour me."

"Okay. So we have to eat the chocolate and we can't start making our toy until everyone's finished." Ken raised a doubtful eyebrow. "Agreed?"

"Agreed!"

"Yep!"

"Done! Hurry up, I want to open my toy," Jun insisted as she prodded Joe's still unopened box.

Joe laughed at the look of impatience on her face as he fished out a foil wrapped egg. He deliberately took his time unwrapping the paper until Jun snatched the egg off of him and stripped it bare.

"I said hurry up." She slammed the chocolate back into his hand.

"I really like her in this condition," Ryu whispered to Ken.

"I don't. She's scary."

"Am NOT!" Jun kicked Ken under the table.

Joe put his hand on her arm. "No violence at the table, please."

"You kicked Ryu earlier!"

"I did not – oh, I did too. Kick away."

"Thank you, now hurry up and eat your chocolate."

..................

"Oh my God!" Ken put his hand over his eyes and peaked at the paper on the table. "More stickers!"

"Ha, ha – sucker!" Jun laughed as she got her own plastic egg to open. Tipping out the contents onto the table she blanched. "Fuck!"

"Told you stickers are a bitch," Joe remarked as he looked down at his own sheet of tiny decals.

"Seriously, did you purposely find the ones with extra stickers?" Ryu held up his own slip of paper.

"Considering I was still straight when I bought these, that's a possibility," Joe answered blithely.

"Surely this stuff should be wearing off by now?" Ken asked plaintively as he struggled to focus on the tiny pictorial instructions. He picked up a plastic piece and compared it to the picture, closing one eye in concentration.

Jun looked at Ryu and giggled softly. She nudged Joe and tilted her head. Joe followed her gaze and stifled his own chuckle. Ryu was practically crossed-eyed as he carefully joined two pieces together inches from his nose.

"So, Ken. Still think these things weren't worth it?" Joe asked innocently, watching his commander swearing under his breath while straining to affix a decal in the correct position.

"Joe." Ken sat back and looked at his second seriously. "I hate you."

BEEP! 'G-1, come in, G-1,' Doctor Nambu's voice cut through their chortling.

"Fuck!" Ken jumped. "Shit. What do I do?"

"Um, answer it?" Jun asked tentatively.

"Are you nuts?" Ken exclaimed, staring at his wrist as if it had suddenly turned into a snake. "I can't talk to Hakase right now!"

'G-1, come in!'

"Ken, you're going to have to talk to him," Joe insisted.

"But I can't!" Ken wailed.

'G-1, answer me!'

"Oh, shit, he's getting pissy!"

"Ken, just answer him. Don't say much, just that you're listening."

BEEP! 'G-2, come in, G-2.'

"Crap!" Joe kicked Ken under the table. "Now he wants to talk to me!"

"Well, answer him then!"

"Joe, answer him or he'll be trying me next!" Jun yelled, looking at Joe's wrist in fear.

Joe took a deep breath. "G-2 here."

'Joe! I tried Ken but he didn't answer. Do you know where he is?'

"Considering the hour, Hakase, I would suggest the most logical place for him to be is in bed."

'Granted, but that's no excuse for not answering.'

"We were rather tired, he may've not heard you." Joe aimed another kick under the table.

"Ow!"

'What was that?'

"Um, Ken...?"

'Ken? But you just told me he would be in... Shit.'

"What?" Joe frowned – for a split second. "Oh, no, NO! Oh fuck, shit, bugger!"

"Hakase, G-1 here. It's not what it sounds like – I'm sleeping with Ryu tonight!"

"Leave me outta this!"

"Ow! You bastard! I told you – no kicking!"

"You told Jun no kicking – you didn't tell me. Besides, you started it!"

"It's my fucking trailer!" Joe spoke into his communicator, "I said that the most logical place for Ken at this hour would be in bed, I didn't say he was actually there."

'What the hell is going on?'

Jun moved her feet out of the way of the war under the table. She spoke carefully into the gadget on her wrist. "We're just sitting around, eating chocolate and shooting the breeze with our best friends. What can we do for you?"

'Please tell me that it's not what it sounds like. It's too early for information like that!'

"I just told you what we're doing, Hakase. Believe or not, it's the truth." Jun took a breath. "Why are you trying to contact Ken at this hour?"

'I need you to launch the GodPhoenix.'

"You've got to be shitting me!"

'Joe! You know I don't appreciate language like that!'

"It wasn't me! For fuck's sake – someone swears and it's all my fault!"

'What's got into you people? The only one that sounds coherent is Jun!'

"Just as well he wasn't listening to her earlier."

'Ryu? I missed that.'

"Probably a good thing, Hakase," Ryu spoke into his own communicator.

'Have you been drinking?'

"No!" Ken exclaimed. "Ow! Will you quit doing that?? That fucking hurt!"

Joe covered his communicator with his hand. "Do you want Hakase to know what we've really been doing?" he hissed across the table.

"Hakase, we are in no condition to launch the GodPhoenix."

'You have been drinking! Ken, how many times I have to tell you-'

"Yeah, whatever, Hakase." Ken slapped a hand over his mouth.

'Ken!'

"Hakase, with respect, I'm not a child-"

'You're certainly acting like one!'

"Fine! But I'm not drunk! I haven't touched a drop of alcohol all night, but I haven't slept either. Under no circumstances, even if Katse were to turn up here right now, will we launch the GodPhoenix."

'We need you to go on a recon, it shouldn't take more than a few hours. Even without sleep you should be able to do it. If all four of you go then you could take shifts, two sleeping, and two working.'

"I repeat, with respect, that we will not launch the GodPhoenix."

'It's an order!'

"Fuck off!"

'Joe!'

"Again, it wasn't me! But I agree with the sentiment."

"So do I."

'Jun!'

"Well, I make three!"

'Ken!?'

"We're in agreement, Hakase. Send someone else. G-1 out." Ken flipped off his bracelet and opening the window he dropped it outside. He ducked as three others flew past his head. He wasn't sure but he was fairly certain he could hear a tiny 'Ken!' as he slammed the window shut.

Looking around at the satisfied faces of his teammates Ken shook his head with a small smile. "You know we're so dead when he catches up with us, right?"

"Yep." Joe nodded, smirking. "Dead as door nails."

"We're hamburger," chuckled Ryu.

"We're screwed, but it's worth it." Jun added. Casually reaching over for a handful of candy, she looked at Joe. "I've changed my mind. I'm not going to kick your arse for getting me stoned."

"You weren't going to."

"Oh, yeah. But I am still gonna kick your arse for teaching Jinpei bad words. Do you have any idea of what I have to put up with from that little shit when he gets pissy? He drives me frigging bonkers with his foul language. Now who's got my fucking stickers?"