DM: Well, so here I am rewriting another fic. I've upped the rating for a lot of reasons, which you will see later on. I hope you all enjoy it! I know a lot of you liked the original, but it was plotless and it really needed to be first person narrated.
Special thanks to MoshiMoshiQueen for helping me with this extensive rewrite!
Disclaimer: I don't own CCS, or anything else that I might reference (such as books, movies, clothing brands, etc.). Character names that you do not recognize from CCS are either people I know or characters of my own creation.
How Should I Know?
Chapter One
What an Idiot!
I remember the day that my life suddenly became complicated. It was a beautiful spring morning in Tomoeda, Japan. The birds were chirping in the sun as a light breeze swished the skirts of the girls on their way to school. They passed a small, two-story yellow house—my house, to be exact.
Up the wooden stairs and to the right was my room; a pink room that was, at the time, flooded with finished (mostly) vacation homework. Inside, a tall, black-haired young man was standing over my lumpy bed, proceeding to drag me out of my peaceful slumber. Actually, I had been awake and looking out the window for a while, but I like to lazy around in bed in the mornings. It feels so nice.
"Come on Monster, wake up, you're not going to be late on the first day, are you?" he was saying, a rather evil smirk playing about his lips.
I, the "Monster" to which he was referring, groaned aloud and threw a pillow at my brother, Touya, the rather mean black-haired youth, who caught it and then proceeded to smother me with it. We don't get along.
"MPH MMMMPH!" I cried, my mouth tasting a mixture of cotton, my leave-in conditioner, and our fabric softener.
Touya lifted the pink pillow off and asked in a sweet voice, "What was that, dear Monster?"
"I said, "I give!" now get off me so I can get dressed, you moron!" I replied, too irritated to come up with anything better.
Touya was already dressed in the light blue blazer, slacks and tie that made the male uniform of Tomoda University (isn't it lame how our college has uniforms?). He's only my elder by a year and a half, but he constantly looks down on me, even now, when I've just been through the most turbulent months of my life.
At the time, he was especially smug that he was going to graduate and move on to the real world at the end of the school year.
I'll show him one day, I thought fiercely, getting out of bed at last and imagining smashing him under my foot. Ever since I was little I've always wished that I could grow as tall as a telephone poll just so I could stomp on him. That's why I drink so much milk.
Touya laughed and left the room, throwing my pillow casually to one side. I slammed the door behind him and began pulling off my pajamas, which consisted of a pink pair of shorts and a tank top with a bunny on it. I glanced at myself in the mirror as I put on my deodorant.
No miracle growth spurt this year. Thanks, God. I thought to myself sarcastically, shaking my head bitterly.
It wasn't that I was totally flat, it's just that I wasn't exactly busty either. Being in-between was so aggravating, especially for me at that time in my life. I pulled on my uniform, a blue blazer with a skirt, and sighed. I was just so average looking. There was nothing that screamed 'gorgeous,' and I always seemed to melt into the crowd, unnoticed. I know it's terribly conceited of me to dwell on this, but back then it was a primary concern of mine.
Average Sakura. Mediocre Kinomoto I thought. That's my name, by the way. Sakura.
But, as I brushed my hair, my natural optimism began seeping back in. I was uplifted at how well my usually crazy auburn locks were behaving that morning, coming down by my ears instead of standing straight up (whoever said that short hair is easier to manage has no clue what they're talking about). My skin was clear (for I was quickly leaving puberty behind me), and I looked, for the first time in my life as I could remember it, as though I'd gotten enough sleep.
Ok. Slightly Prettier than Average Sakura I corrected in my mind.
I didn't realize then how much sleep I'd lose that spring. Of course, he was the cause of it all.
It was just lucky that I could commute to school instead of having to live in the dorms like some of the other students. I liked having these quiet moments to myself in the mornings, even if staying at home was a bit…stifling. The problem lied in Touya, who had caused me to never have a boyfriend in all my 21 years of life. In case you're wondering, yes I'd been on dates, but I'd never made it to date three before Touya had discovered us and scared him off. Sometimes I'd wish I'd been born a lesbian, so that he'd just let me be.
I smelled eggs as I walked down the stairs. My father was cooking, wearing the red apron I had got him for Christmas over his suit for work. His briefcase was by the door.
Our kitchen is small, but comfortable with a breakfast nook and a large refrigerator. The walls are painted a pale rust-color with cabinets made of light-colored wood. From the kitchen you can see the front sitting room, painted white and plastered with all of my and Touya's work from when we were in elementary school. How embarrassing.
"Morning, Dad." I said cheerfully.
"Morning, Sweetheart," he replied, giving me a smile over his shoulder.
I sat down and looked at the picture of my mom on the table. Dad had changed it to the one of her sitting on a swing, one of the few not taken by a professional.
"Good morning, Mom," I whispered to the smiling, pretty lady with green eyes and black hair that sat in the picture. About that, she died a long time ago. Don't worry about it—I don't really remember her and my family gets along fine.
He brought me a plate of scrambled eggs. As I ate, I wondered, like I usually did at the start of the term, if we would get any new students this year. There was always at least one poor soul who didn't know anyone and was tormented for all of first semester trying to make friends.
"C'mon Monster, let's go. Yukito is waiting for us," Touya said, walking into the room suddenly. He had already eaten breakfast and was ready to go, evidently excited to see his best friend.
I immediately stuffed the rest of the eggs in my mouth and choked down my orange juice. I hadn't seen Yukito for two weeks! I couldn't wait to ask him about his trip to China and all the cool things he must have seen… To be honest, since I was young he's been my idol. The one guy I really liked but would never dare pursue.
I pulled on my roller blades (yes, I know I'm dorky) as Touya unlocked his bike. They were my old pink and yellow pair that still fit me. My feet stopped growing in junior high, along with my chest, unfortunately. I had bought a new helmet over break, though, a light pink one specially designed to reduce helmet hair. I was about to see if it would work. When we took off, my heart started racing in anticipation. This was my last chance at telling Yukito how I felt—he would be graduating this year. I, unfortunately, was only a junior. Well, in retrospect I'm kind of happy that it was that way.
What did I like about Yukito? Something about his kind, gray eyes. His gray hair, too, looked so soft…He made me feel on top of the world when he smiled! Especially when he had his glasses off!
"Yuki!" Touya called, snapping me to attention.
"Touya! Sakura! Good morning!" he returned, waving.
Yukito got on his bike and drew abreast of us. I felt my cheeks burn as he acknowledged me with a smile (to be honest, I think he still saw me as a child) and began talking to Touya.
Suddenly, he got off his bike and hugged me. I gasped in delight, staring up at him. Did I mention that he was quite tall? I closed my eyes as he leaned his face down to kiss me and—
WHAM! I saw stars and rubbed my head as it started to throb.
"Nice one, Monster! You really ate it that time!" I heard Touya's voice in the darkness.
"Sakura, are you ok?" Yukito asked. I slowly opened one eye.
As I was daydreaming about Yukito I had skated straight into a goddamn tree. I felt my face go red and got up before Yukito could help me, and then cursed myself for not letting him help, only to lose my balance again and topple over backwards.
"Hey, watch it!"
A male voice rang in my ear as strong hands held my waist and set me on my feet. I turned around to apologize, but then realized that the guy was still really close. Our noses were almost touching, and I could see the gold flecks in his amber eyes as they filled my vision.
"Uh—Sorry! I'm so sorry I just—" I began, backing away and noting his messy brown hair as it framed his serious, tan and handsome face. He was not much taller than me, but I'm pretty tall as far as girls go. Like I said, I drink a lot of milk.
"Don't know how to skate?" he cut me off, finishing my explanation. My eyebrow twitched at that.
He smirked at me. I fumed and backed away, mildly repulsed by his arrogance. However, I only admit now that my heart was still racing from our close encounter. Touya was glaring at the guy, and Yukito was smiling and fidgeting nervously.
"I do too know how to skate!" I retorted immediately, despite the fact that I sounded rather childish, "I just lost my balance! Sorry for falling on you." I added the last bit in an effort to sound mature.
"You didn't, I caught you," he replied, shrugging and continuing to smirk. I noticed now that he was dressed like my brother, carrying an over-the-shoulder bag that looked rather full.
What nerve! I remember thinking as I turned away and skated in what I secretly hoped was a graceful manner back to my brother. I didn't know what it was, but the guy really got under my skin.
"You watch yourself, kid," Touya said, although he looked to be around our age.
He took a menacing step closer to the guy, who only ran a hand through his messy brown hair nonchalantly and shrugged again. Yukito and Touya got back on their bikes and began pedaling, quickly sick of his attitude, as was I. I was about to follow when I felt a hand on my shoulder. My heart jumped again, to my dismay.
"What? Thanks for catching me," I said grudgingly (my last-ditch effort to behave like the adult I was supposed to be), turning to look at the stranger.
He's not bad looking I found myself suddenly admitting.
"Oh don't mention it. I wanted to ask you—do you know where Tomoeda University is, Darling?"
"Um, duh, I'm wearing the uniform," I replied, annoyed by the dumb question. I pointed to the symbol stitched over my left breast on my blazer. He looked at it a little longer than necessary and then started walking before I could even give him directions, following the direction Touya and Yukito had taken. They had gone on ahead without me, much to my disappointment.
Sighing, I began skating next to my newfound companion in silence. Things to say kept bubbling to my mind, like "What's your name," or "Where're you from," but I was too reluctant to indicate my interest in him to speak. I felt like each time I swallowed it was incredibly loud and I wondered if he could hear it.
"I'm Li—" he said suddenly after about two minutes of this excruciating awkwardness, almost causing me to lose my balance in surprise, "Li Syaoran. What's your name, Darling?"
"Kinomoto," I said flatly, irritated that he was still calling me Darling.
"Kinomoto what?" he continued, actually turning to look at me.
"Why do you want to know?" I asked, snapping my head away but watching him out of the corner of my eye, "You'll just be calling me Kinomoto."
I rolled my eyes. It was one thing for a guy to be rude, but to try to pick me up right afterwards? Ridiculous. I would never fall for that kind of playing.
"Actually," he said slowly, his voice laced with mild annoyance, "I'll just be calling you Darling until you get off of that high horse of yours. Or, better yet, Sugar."
Unable to counter that quickly, I resorted to what all people who are bad at math resort to when they're stuck: "It's incorrect grammar to say 'off of'. It's just 'off'," I corrected. Looking back, I'm rather embarrassed about that.
He shrugged yet again. It was quickly becoming his signature move. I turned towards him (since he had stopped looking at me), and got a good look at him for the first time. He had a strong profile. As much as I hated to admit it, he was more than not bad looking—he was pretty good looking.
"It's ok, Darling, I know I'm pretty," he said suddenly. The punk had been watching me out of the corner of his eye, I realized, flushing with embarrassment.
I rolled my eyes again as he turned and smiled at me. "Whatever…" I muttered.
I just have to say that I'm usually much more witty than that, but every time I looked at him, my mind seemed to go blank. I spent the rest of the walk trying to come up with good comebacks, only realizing as we rounded the last corner that they were worthless without the right context.
At last we arrived at school, which was as beautiful as always, with its cherry tree-lined courtyard and the kids smiling and laughing after the long break. Li pulled a piece of paper out of his pocket and scanned it. I peered over his shoulder and read it. It was his schedule—boy did we have a lot of classes in common! Now that I think about it, it must have been fate.
Suddenly Li sniffed the air delicately and then turned to me and sniffed my head, which was close to his as I read his schedule. I was growing more and more mortified by the second.
"What kind of shampoo do you use, Darling?" he asked out of the blue.
I pulled away and almost fell over in surprise, having forgotten that I was still in my skates. What the hell kind of question was that? I mean seriously.
"Um…Herbal Essences," I muttered truthfully, too taken aback to be a smartass.
"It smells divine," he continued in a sarcastically flamboyant tone, "I noticed it before when you klutzed out and nearly killed me." He finished the last bit with a couple of dramatic hand gestures.
"What?! I didn't do anything of the sort!" I replied hastily. People were watching us as we walked by, and Li's handsome appearance was drawing attention.
"Whatev you say, Darling," he replied, checking his nails and pursing his lips in an impression of ditzy femininity.
"Ugh, puh-lease," I replied, stalking off.
We had made it to the shoe lockers by that point, much to my relief. I put away my skates, grabbed my indoor shoes and started walking to class, leaving Li behind.
"Darling, wait!" he called after me with more dramatic flourish than necessary.
Why is he so loud? I thought, cringing. People were flat-out staring at us, and not just because he was cute.
"What, Li?" I said without turning around, "You know, you can call me Kinomoto."
"But you behave so much like a Darling it's hard for me to believe that you aren't one!" He whined sarcastically at me and grabbed my arm, linking it with his. My heart thumped against my will and I let him walk with me like that a few steps before he suddenly blew my mind by asking:
"Would you like to go out with me this Friday?"
I blinked twice and then burst out laughing. Half was out of nervousness and the other half out of how such a flamboyant person could possibly exist. Yukito's face didn't even come to my mind, which should have told me then that maybe my first love wasn't as deep as I thought it was.
"You're right," he said, laughing lightheartedly with me, "it is funny, because it's the only time you've ever been asked out and I was joking," he redoubled his grip on my arm and smirked as I stopped laughing, "I just wanted to know where room 3-2 was. Virgin." That last word was whispered but it irritated me more than all the rest combined.
I felt my left eye twitch. What a jerk! I thought angrily as I tried to shake my arm free but he only held on more tightly.
The walk seemed endless. Here was this incredibly gorgeous guy holding onto me tightly. The part of my arm he was touching felt hot through my blazer and I was starting to feel lightheaded from the ridiculously fast beating of my heart. I snuck a glance at him, wondering if he could feel the crazy thumping in my chest. He seemed calm, and even whispered, "You have nice eyes," in a teasing tone. I blushed against my will. My eyes are bright green, by the way.
People were staring rather openly at us as we walked down the hall and my swallows became very loud again. It was a relief when we finally made it to room 3-2.
"Ok, now get off and go chat with the teacher," I said softly, finally managing to shake him off my arm. I sighed (mostly with relief) as he walked away.
"Okey dokey, Darling!" He called in a would-be sweet voice after me as I made my way over to my friend Tomoyo, who was thankfully in the same class as me yet again. He began talking with the teacher, a young man by the name of Terada who was barely out of college himself. I surveyed the classroom, my home for the next nine or so months. It was neatly divided into rows of desks and chairs that all faced a large blackboard. Very old fashioned, but that's how I like it.
"Good morning, Sakura! Oh, who is that hot guy that came in with you?" Tomoyo asked, flipping her long, curly, violet hair over her shoulder. The school forbade us to wear any accessories, but Tomoyo always had lovely painted nails. It was about as rebellious as she ever got, really, being a model student and all. I shoved my plain hands into the pockets of my blazer.
Tomoyo and I had been (well, I should say "have" seeing we're still friends—even after what happened) friends since elementary school. In fact, I'd known most of the people in the class since elementary school. That's the kind of place Tomoeda is—everyone knows everyone. And who they're screwing, I thought, eyeing two other childhood friends, Chiharu and Yamazaki, as they giggled together.
"Beats the hell out of me," I replied, shrugging, "Some jerk."
Tomoyo didn't seem to mind my disdain and as I sat down I could see her look Li up and down. I loved my best friend but couldn't help but envy her—Tomoyo was what the me of that spring wanted to be more than anything: mysterious, enigmatic, graceful. She had lots of secret admirers, but was always so modest…I never had any secret admirers… Although, Tomoyo often tells me that I don't notice very much around me. Never mind that, it's not important,
"Hey Darling, what's wrong?" Li's voice suddenly filled my ears.
I jumped, and then realized that I had unconsciously sighed aloud. Li was looking at me curiously, almost with concern.
"Nothing, Li, now go away," I replied coolly, regaining my composure.
"Oh but the teacher said that you should show me around during lunch," he countered, tilting his head matter-of-factly, "since we already know each other. Besides, I'm sitting behind you!" he exclaimed.
He sat down and gleefully prodded my back, turning to wink at a group of guys behind him, who were glaring, probably because of all the noise he was making.
Tomoyo watched us, and looked…jealous? Marveling at this, I rushed to introduce them, lest the situation become more awkward.
"Li, this is Daidouji Tomoyo," I said quickly, gesturing between them. Tomoyo sat to my left.
"Li Syaoran," he replied, inclining his head in her direction, "pleased to meet you, my lovely."
He took Tomoyo's hand and winked at her. I was amazed when Tomoyo blushed and giggled. I'd never thought her a sucker for that corny crap. Although I recall wondering why he hadn't been such a Casanova with me.
"I had no idea that beautiful people such as yourself associated with girls like Kinomoto, Daidouji," he continued, causing my eyebrow to twitch and Tomoyo to giggle.
I groaned and threw an eraser at him, not bothering to worry about whether or not that was mature. Something about him brought out the child in me.
"Aha! Finders keepers!" he said triumphantly, nimbly snatching it out of the air and tucking it in his pocket.
I sighed…This was going to be a long year, I predicted.
Even if one ignored the flirtatious atmosphere between Tomoyo and Li, there was still the fact that math class got harder each year, and that I had to re-try for the cheerleading squad since we got a new coach. Back in high school I had thought that things would get easier in college (and that I would be able to drop math) only to be disproven right away.
Now Li had entered my life to make things worse.
Of course, I didn't realize then that he would push all these concerns to the background and force me to face a new side of myself.
Insert line here
Lunchtime should have been my relief from the transfer student, but unfortunately Terada had counted on my seemingly kind and charitable heart to take care of the brat.
Tomoyo and I had been eating our homemade lunches under a large cherry tree in the enormous school quad (where four buildings delineated a weird trapezoid-shaped area of grass) when he strolled up, bread in hand, ready for his tour.
"What the hell did I do to deserve this?" I asked the sky, leaving my yummy lunch behind and beginning to show him around. I decided to take the shortest rout: the science building through to the library and then to the math and humanities buildings.
"Why so mad, Darling? I just like you," he said happily, grinning at me.
Li stuck his tongue out at me and I swear my heart stopped. I couldn't understand it—here was the most immature guy I'd ever met in my life, and he was making my heart skip beats without trying. I looked around and noticed that groups of girls were following them around. I felt myself frown with irritation. Pretty soon he'd have a fanclub or something. Apparently my brother had one.
"Here is the library," I said, having finished giving him a brief tour of the science building, "As you can see we have a silent study center so you can study alone for things—"
"—another place that looks good for making out—" he interrupted, but I didn't care to give him a reply.
"—Oh! Yukito!" I cut him off, seeing my crush coming out of the history section with a teetering stack of books. He smiled at me and hobbled over, looking very cute while doing it, might I add.
"Hey, Sakura, how's your day so far?" he asked, smiling.
"Fine, and yours?" I asked, feeling a blush creep into my cheeks.
"Well I already have so much work!" he replied, the books threatening to topple when I held them up just in time.
We both laughed together as Li watched, silent for once. I resisted the urge to turn and smirk at him as my eyes Yukito's and my heart skipped a beat. Suddenly Yukito blushed as well as he stared back.
Ohmygodhelikesmeohmygodohmygodohmygod!! My mind raced, heart thumping like mad.
Suddenly Touya materialized behind him with an equally large stack of books. Damn him I thought bitterly. Yukito seemed to snap out of a trance, and with a shy, "Bye, Sakura" he went over to my brother.
Forgetting completely that Li was there, I allowed myself to sigh dreamily at his retreating back. Such a beautiful back…
"I'm cuter than he is," I heard suddenly.
I turned and saw Li pouting. I frowned at him and shook my head, secretly delighting in his annoyance. We left the library and headed towards math, which was next to the gym.
"You like him," he continued, changing from pouting to grinning in a second, "You want to kiss him. You want to have his babies," he sang out, doing pelvic thrusts in time with the words. Some kids nearby stopped their soccer game (we were now by the athletic fields) and stared as he did this perverted dance in a circle around an extremely angry me.
I smacked him upside the head, but he only laughed, increasing my fury.
"You know, Darling, twenty-five is really too many," he continued, taking on a phony serious attitude.
I stopped frowning, unsure of what he was talking about.
"Too many what?" I asked, narrowing my eyes with suspicion.
"TOO MANY BABIES!" he yelled.
With that, he stuck his tongue out at me again and ran off, and I chased after him and tackled him to the ground, like the immature idiot I was. What an idiot! I thought angrily, attempting to strangle him. Li made an ecstatic, sexual face, which only made me livid with embarrassment. We were causing quite a scene.
"Oh how I love Japan!" he cried from underneath me
I punched him in the face and got up, walking away resolutely.
"Nice panties," he called from behind me, "I like bunnies, too!"
This is, of course, exactly how one should go about meeting the love of their life.
DM: Well that's Chapter One rewritten! Please review and tell me how you liked it! Please?