A/N:Good news--I've just returned from a three month break! Bad news is that squirrels are evil...

Okasies that was random, but it kinda fits in with the whole random theme. Okay, heads up on this chapter, some of the characters (2 or 3) are people I know and there's mebbe 1 or 2 inside jokes, but don't worry, because I LOVE YOU! But not like that of course. Haha.

Ack, I'm rambling again, well...read, review, and enjoy! (Or else, haha)

Disclaimer: I don't own Fruits Basket, or any of the other well...everything in this story, which are Hamtaro, Sailor Moon, Darth Vadar, Spongebob, The Orkin man, Kingdom Hearts (since I mentioned that I might as well say it) or Natsuki Takaya's 'haha's or author's notes, Kyo, Tohru, Shigure, Yuki, Mr. Roger's music, Hey Diddle Diddle, aaaaaaaand...I think that's it but if there's any more, don't flame me--cringes

Egad, I'm in a weird mood today. Haha.

It was a very merry day in the neighborhood, a beautiful day for a neighbor, when Kyo Shigure, Tohru, Yuki, and an anime-ish spongebob were caroling outside on the roof (because everyone sings on the roof) singing random Mr. Rogers Music, when all of a sudden a giant tomato came out and ate the roof, so they were forced to sit on the ground.

"That sure was mean of that tomato!" Shigure shouted.

"He should of stayed and sang with us," Tohru added.

Kyo, ignoring the whole situation shouted, "I LOVE TRISTA MORE THAN SARAH R.!"

"Egad, how could you say that?" Screamed Tohru, "Sarah R. probably loves you more than she loves David!"

Suddenly, Sarah R. popped out of the hedges and screamed "DON'T SAY THAT SO LOUDLY!" and ran away blushing.

After an awkward silence the five began singing 'Hey diddle diddle' Mr. Rogers style.

"I wish I was a dish."

"Why'd you say that, Shigure?" Tohru asked.

"Then I could run away with the spoon."

"But the dish was probably a woman, you wouldn't want people making odd fanfictions about you, not to mention that the fiddle-playing cat was much better," Kyo pointed out.

"But he didn't get the girl, and the dog was so much better than the cat..."

"Allright, I'll admit it, I love spongebob," Tohru confessed out of the blue.

"Gasp!" Kyo gasped.

"Gasp!" Shigure gasped.

"Gasp!" Yuki gasped.

"Gasp!" the giant roof-eating tomato gasped.

"Gasp!" Spongebob gasped.

"Gasp!" Darth Vadar gasped as he chopped the giant roof-eating tomato in half and red stuff splattered everywhere.

"Don't worry, darling, it's not blood, it's only ketchup." Spongebob said to Tohru.

"Oh spongebob, I love you so much!" Tohru said.

"And I love the spoon!" Shigure said.

"AND I LOVE TRISTA MORE THAN SARAH R.!11ONEOONE1!11SEVENTEN!" shouted Kyo.

"Who do you love, Yuki?" Asked spongebob.

"I...I love...HAMTARO!"

(A/N: Isn't this so dramatic? Ah, true love! Swoons--haha.)

(AA/N: Don't I sound like Natsuki Takaya with all these 'haha' author's notes? Haha.)

"Wow Yuki, I never knew you were...like...that," gasped Tohru.

"I guess you both are rodents..." Shigure said.

"And I'm the Orkin man!" said the Orkin man as he sprayed rat killer on Yuki.

"NUUUUUUUUUUU! I'm DYING! Save me Hamtaro!"

Hamtaro suddenly came running out of the bushes and killed the Orkin man with his uber-cool kung-foo moves.

"Now I'm afraid that that's not ketchup," Spongebob whispered in Tohru's ear.

"YUMMY!" Hamtaro shouted and began eating the Orkin man.

"Hamtaro, how could you leave meee! I"m still dyinggggggg!" Yuki screamed.

"I'll save you!" a bunch of random fangirls screamed and leaped out of the bush and started hitting Yuki with tree branches."All this violence is making me angry!" Kyo said.

"Then let's have a pokemon battle!" Shigure suggested.

"No, I'm not afraid of cute little monsters."

"What are you afraid of?"

"Darth Vadar," Yuki shuddered as he pointed to Darth Vadar who was still sitting in the ruins of the tomato.

"Egad!"

"We all know that there's only one way to kill Darth Vadar," said Spongebob..

"What?"

"You have to kill EVERYBODY!"

"But I'm in love with Trista!" shouted Kyo. "I can't kill her!"

"But I'm in love with the spoon!" shouted Shigure, "I can't kill him!"

"So it's a him?" Tohru gasped.

"Uh...no..."

dramatic pause-

"OK, YES! AND I LOVE HIM!"

"...Wow..." Yuki croaked.

"You aren't one to talk, you love Hamtaro...hey, I thought you were dead!" said Shigure.

"But...Hamtaro's a girl, right?" asked Yuki.

Everyone's eyes widened and they returned to Hamtaro who was slowly sneaking back to the bushes.

(A/N: I just beat Kingdom Hearts CoM reverse and rebirth yesterday! It was so dramatic, poor Riku, he had to beat harder bosses than Sora (haha) It had such a good ending though! (I had to add something video-gamey as an authors note to sound like the author.) ( haha) Hope you like the story so far! Haha.)

"Well Hamtaro?" Tohru asked, eybrow raised.

Hamtaro blushed. "Well...you know how hard it is to tell with small rodents, if you get what I saying."

"You can say that again," Yuki said.

Kyo and Shigure started twitching, and Spongebob covered Tohru's eyes (A/N: Like that's gonna do anything, haha)

"You know what this means!" Kyo said.

"What?" asked Shigure. "You love Trista more than Sarah R.?"

"No, I changed my mind, I like Sarah R. better–"

"Siiiiii!" Sarah R. called from the bushes.

"–and we hafta kill EVERYONE!" Kyo finished. "Ya know, like Spongebob said."

"Egad!" Said Tohru.

"Egad!" Said Yuki.

"Egad!" Said Spongebob.

"I LOVE YOU TOOO KYOOO!" Shouted Sarah R.

Trista suddenly appeared behind Sarah R.'s back holding a big scary weapon that can create Ms. Moores out of nothing and began chasing Sarah R. who was running away very quickly indeed.

"How are we going to kill everyone?" Asked Spongebob.

"I dunno, you came up with the idea, and it's just me and Shigure killing everyone"

"Shigure and I killing everyone," lectured a random Language Arts teacher.

"Good thing I'm a spork" Said the spoon.

"NUUUUU! Don't lie to me like that, you're a spoon!" shouted Shigure. "Hm...I should write a story about this..."

"OMG IT'S A TACO!" shouted Tohru.

"Egad!" said Spongebob.

"No, it's a spoon!" said Kyo.

"I love Hamtaro who is genderly-confused" said Yuki.

awkward silence-

"Oh look, Kyo, I have a gun!" shouted Shigure.

"That's great! Now we can kill everyone!" Darth Vadar said.

"No, it's just Shigure and I that are killing people. We're the only ones with weapons!"

"But I have a lightsaber and you don't have a weapon!"

"The last lightsaber died long ago in a galaxy far, far away. So did you. You're dead. Like Yuki. And that tomato. And the Orkin man. I just bought a gun from Sailor Moon anyways."

"Egad!" said Darth Vadar and he died.

"Egad! said Sailor Moon.

(A/N: Sailor Moon, gotta love her D )

"I'm angry" said Kyo. "Are you angry, Shigure?"

"I am angry." said Shigure.

"THEN LET'S KILL EVERYONEEEEE!"

"Egad!" Said everyone in the world.

Then Kyo and Shigure killed everyone. Even the rocks. Even the Hamtaros. Even Sailor moon!

"Well, I guess that's everyone!" said Kyo. "Everyone except..." he stared at Shigure.

Shigure stared back.

"I can't kill you!" screamed Kyo.

"Why?"

"Because I'm already dead."

"Oh."

Then they both died. The End. (A/N: Until the next chapter, bwahahaha)

A/N: Sorry to about making such a stupid fanfiction, but it didn't take me too long! (Don't worry, I'm still working on my Peter Pan story, haha) I'd like to thank my friend Sonic-lover3 and her new completely random story! (Haha) Oh, and for the die-hard Fruits Basket fans, I'm sorry I'm making fun of your favorite characters and /or author, I truly am nods Sooo...:takes out gun: REVIEW!