Chapter One...
... in which blouses are ruined and cell phones are broken
"Jarod... I know that I have already asked you this thousands of futile times but why are you intending to send me of all people to a private school? And stop that", Jamie Denton told her father who was busy cramming a package of Oreo cookies into her already overstuffed bag.
"I am honestly wondering why your bag is that crammed at your first day already", he complained, apparently oblivious to her objections. "You don't even have any books yet!"
Jamie snatched the cookies away impatiently, unzipped the bag and crammed her breakfast between her cell-phone, a case filled with pens and Volume 5 of the Harry Potter series.
„Why can't you fix me a sandwich or give me money like every other dad?" she whined without answering his question.
"Why don't you answer my question?" he asked, affronted while he clung to the stirring wheel with both hands. Who had ever claimed it to be easy to handle a teenager?
„Because you don't reply to my question either", Jamie replied and grabbed the door-handle.
„He he", her father stated mischieviosly and snapped the safety interlock shut, which caused Jamie to turn around, annoyed.
"Right, J-Dog. What's your problem?"
Jarod sighed and touched her cheek. "Baby, you know that I am doing what is best for you. I believe that you are very smart und I want you to be able to develop your multiple talents… without criminal elements having a bad influence on you!"
Defeated, Jamie sighed. "You're right. It wasn't to brilliant a thing to paint the chemistry room red but the teacher was…"
Jarod interrupted her by means of a calmingly raised forefinger.
„We talked about that already. Forgiven and forgotten. We will start a new life here in Delaware, now won't we? Nobody knows you over here and you can show everyone just how smart you really are."
Jamie smiled and kissed her father's cheek.
"Righto, J-Man. See you tonight."
„Okay, but don't call me J-Man. I am your father. You have got to respect me", Jarod said smartly.
„Right, J-Man", she said and opened the door upon hearing the humming of the safety interlock. Before Jamie slammed the door shut, she bent down again.
"And have fun. Whatever you're doing today…"
„I really wish you were more interested in your father's genius. I help people who've been as unlucky in life as I have been before I…"
At this point, Jamie slammed the door shut, because she had been forced to listen to that lecture a few times too often lately.
"Yeah, J-Dog. And one time your weird pretends will get your sorry ass to jail", she murmured, hesitated for a second and then walked through the gate.
If Jarod had turned around once more before he sped to the location of his next pretend, he would have surely noticed the black BMW-cabrio. And for two reasons, that was. Firstly the drivers way of driving was criminal and secondly the brunette behind the wheel would have looked familiar to him…
"Do you have your lunch-money?" Miss Parker asked her daughter while she checked her eye make-up in the rear-view mirror.
"Yes, Mom", Catherine replied calmly and looked at her mother while she turned the red lipstick back into its base with trained fingers.
"Well, then I wish a you great day, my sweet. If your maths teacher happens to be trouble again, feel free to drop my name into the conversation, will you?"
Catherine gave her a dark smile, that made her appear much like her mother's clone and adjusted her blouse.
"Don't worry, Mom. I'll be able to handle that guy myself."
Miss Parker regarded her daughter with a look of motherly pride and softly caressed her cheek.
"Oh, my darling. I couldn't possibly wish for a more perfect daughter."
Catherine smiled and reached for her bag.
"There's quite a lot I need to get done before lessons. Gotta go."
Miss Parker looked worried as she frowned.
"I hope it's not some voluntary work or peer tutoring? Darling, too many activities at school are very likely to make you look like some pathetic attention seeker!"
"Oh please," Catherine clicked her tongue. "Miss Jenkins wants to talk about my history assignment with me."
Miss Parker laughed, obviously relieved. "Oh thank god. Well, then I'll go and terrorize our bald friend for a bit. Otherwise he is going to get all frowzy again."
"Give him my best regards."
"Would you mind if I changed the wording a bit? That is going to terrify the hell out of him," Miss Parker replied with an amused smile.
"Well, then I hope you are going to get that deal with the French company secured all right. Good luck." Her mother stretched her long legs and gestured at her short skirt.
"I don't need luck, baby. If everything goes smoothly I'll take you out for dinner to that new French place in town tonight."
Catherine's face lit up. "The one with the 97 burgundy?"
"That's the one. Okay, darling. You need to get going. And remember to have a cup of coffee before lessons!"
She handed her daughter a ten dollar bill and winked at her.
"Thanks, mom. You know what your daughter needs," Catherine said, after which Miss Parker pointed a long red fingernail at her cheek.
Catherine kissed her and exited the car, after which her mother sped down the street with screeching tires.
"Oh mom... one day you're driving will get you arrested..." Catherine murmured and then stepped onto the school grounds.
"Oh no!" Jamie rolled her eyes, groaning. In the distant past - like nearly five weeks ago - she had been able to play her cell-phone game excellently. Even her dad had had to admit that although he couldn't have cared less for computers or cell-phone games. But since she had displaced her charging device and had only found it when they'd moved into their new house last weekend, she had really got out of practice.
Now she aimlessly wandered the hallways of her new school while she was actually looking for the student office to find out about her timetable and pressed her cell phone's buttons as if she were possessed. Somehow she had to manage to get back into shape before her uncle Kyle would pay her a visit in two weeks.
That was because she still owed him a re-match. Well, and that student office she would somehow recognize if she actually happened to come by it.
Jamie automatically quickened her step. Completely engrossed in the game she neither noticed her breakneck pace nor the dark-haired girl that had just accepted a cup of coffee.
"The same as usual, Miss Parker."
That instance proved to be fatal since both girl crashed into each other a mere moment later.
"Oh hell can't you watch your step?" the brunette hissed and looked down at the very obvious coffee stain on her new blouse with narrowed eyes. "If one is too dumb to walk one should probably reconsider one's right to exist."
Jamie lowered her eyebrows. "Oh come on... stop bitching around! You just grilled my cell phone! Doesn't serve to make me any happier..."
"What?" Her opponent was speechless for a moment.
"Cell phone. Mine. Coffee. Broken." Jamie explained, waving her old cell phone in front of the other girl.
"Oh my god. It's not exactly a pity for that... club," she snapped back and waved Jamie's hand aside. "But I have to walk around wearing my blazer all day long."
With these words she turned on her heel and walked towards her locker with long strides to get her jacket.
Jamie stared after her angrily. "I hope you get huge sweat-stains!" she called down the hallway after her and then inspected her cell phone carefully.
Well, at least she would be able to convince Jarod to buy her a new one now since it was him who wanted her to be available to him at all times.
As usual Catherine Parker had arrived in her classroom a few minutes before the bell and gone into hiding behind her books immediately. Only when she took a sip from her third cup of coffee this morning she raised her eyes and took quick looks through the room.
That was the reason why she only noticed after a while that the usually distracted and overly nervous maths teacher Miss Bones was acting even more out of sorts today.
She stood directly by the door and goggled at every male student who entered the room as if scrutinizing their faces.
As for the female students she just waved them past her impatiently.
Suddenly her face lit up. She produced a huge smile that made Catherine shudder in her spot at the front of the class, then lurched forwards and grabbed a boy's hand and shook it almost violently. The guy with the obviously dyed blond hair looked confused.
"Well welcome to Lincoln Academy, Mister Denton!" she said exuberantly. Then she turned towards the other students and, the boy's hand still in hers, announced: "Class, this is your new fellow student, James Denton! He's joined us from beautiful California and this his first day here with us!"
The student cleared his throat in slight embarrassment while the whole room broke into laughter. Well, the whole room except for Catherine who did not consider the situation quite as funny as the rest of the students. She found the fact that her senior year's maths teacher was obviously seriously scatterbrained far more disturbing than amusing.
"I am Adam Smith. I've been your student for over two years."
"Ha!" Miss Bones dropped his hand, horrified. "You are not James Denton? My new pupil?"
"Exactly." Adam replied calmly and dropped into his chair.
"Well...." Miss Bones scurried back to her desk in obvious confusion and raised a memorandum for everyone to see. "But it says here that a new student from California will arrive today."
"Probably. But it's not me."
The teacher shrugged. "Well, whatever. Let's start the lesson now. Collect the homework... someone. We are going to study vector analysis for a bit today."
There was whispering in the girl's corner behind Catherine:
"A new student. How interesting!" Carol enthused and flung her homework at the passing student who collected it.
Strawberry blond Louisa rolled her eyes with pleasure. "James Denton. That name sure sounds promising. But obviously..."
"... he is going to be sitting next to Catherine," Carol finished her sentence. "How come that there's always a free spot next to her when we get a new guy?"
"Witch!" Louisa muttered, but was silenced at once when Catherine turned around to her with a smug smile and announced in a superior tone: "It's a question of proper organization, my dear. Wouldn't hurt you to try it sometime..."
Louisa was still trying to come up with a fitting answer to that when Carol nudged her in the ribs. The classroom door had just been opened but when there was no attractive new student but a curious looking girl who entered the room, they sighed in disappointment.
Probably a girl from the lower grades who'd forgotten her bag or jacket yesterday...
"Yes, child?" Miss Bones asked with her eyebrows raised and a huge stain of chalk on her nose when she finally noted her presence.
"Hello," the girl replied. "I'm sorry but I couldn't find the classroom. Well... actually I couldn't find the student's office. That's why I didn't know which room I actually had to look for. That's why I wouldn't have been able to find it anyway... until now. I would have really liked to be on time on my first day, but my hands were practically tied, you know. Well, to make a long story short: Here I am."
"And who are you?" Miss Bones asked, once again confused.
But Catherine had long since recognized the girl.
"It's impertinence on legs," she sighed softy and could hear Carol and Louisa giggle behind her.
"The new student. They told me that you knew I was coming."
"There has to be a mistake. I am expecting a male new student," the maths teacher disagreed.
The girl sighed. "I should have expected that. I can assure you, you did not confuse anything. I am James Denton. Confusing, I know. People call me Jamie, anyway. Please direct any complaints at my father. Well... there's chalk on your nose incidentally," she added, unmoved.
"So..." Miss Bones rubbed her face in an erratic motion. "I can only hope that this is not a rotten joke, Mr Denton. I will have to make inquiries about you!"
"Miss Denton, if you wouldn't mind."
"I will call you Mr Denton until the issue is resolved," the teacher opposed her stubbornly.
"You may sit next to Miss Parker right here. And now, let's proceed with the vector."
She turned back to the board and her calculations while the new girl dropped onto her chair next to Catherine.
"Oh you," she said, less than enthusiastic when she had finally realized whom she was sitting next to.
Catherine cocked an eyebrow. This didn't seem to be one of her better days. First Miss Jenkins had told her that she would have to revise her assignment again if she was aiming for an A+ instead of an A, then her blouse had been drenched in coffee caused by an absolutely insufferable person and then the unspeakable turned out to be her new classmate.
"Who's that hector guy?" Jamie asked.
Catherine rolled her eyes. Why wasn't she surprised that this girl obviously didn't know anything about mathematics? "Vector," she corrected her dismissively. "And I would like to ask you to shut up right now if you don't mind. I can actually make some sense out of these explanations, which is why I would like to listen to them, James."
She put some emphasis on the name and smiled even more contentedly when she heard Louise whisper at Carol: "I'll never forgive her for being a girl!"
"Jaaaarooood! Jaaaaaroooood!" Jamie had made herself comfortable on the huge couch in the living room after school and was now trying to attract her father's attention after she had heard the sound of the front door. Without having to get up preferably.
„Jaaaarooood!"
Jarod eventually appeared in the doorway.
"I am not your dog!" he greeted her indignantly. "Do you think I'll always come running whenever you call for me?"
"Well, so far it worked. If you're opposed to that kind of behavior, you should have raised me to be more polite," Jamie was unimpressed.
"Oh my god, you're really quite spoiled, darling. Give me some room on the sofa."
Jamie sat up and her father crashed down next to her.
"Now, tell me about your first day at school!" He looked at her expectantly.
"Oh..." Jamie hesitated. "Actually it was quite okay. Went as I expected."
"And what did you expect?"
Jamie sighed. "My maths teacher believes me to be a dangerous terrorist who has infiltrated her lesson using an alias. All the girls hate me because I am not a sexy guy but a boring girl. Some guy called James went berserk on me because he thought I was making fun of him. He was like four inches taller than me and offered to stick me in a dustbin. Headfirst, of course. Another girl hates me even more because I am not only not a hot guy but I also ruined her blouse with coffee and my cell phone is broken. Really good idea to move here."
"Since when do you drink coffee?" Jarod asked, confused.
"Is that all you can come up with? Pity, J-Man. It's a pity, really. This is my cell phone. It makes gurgling noises." Jamie tossed him the phone and groaned when she noticed that he had once again adopted his most patronizing expression.
"You don't have to replace everything right away just because it's broken. Just try to go by without it for a while and you will treat the new item with more care."
"Are there any precedents on that?" Jamie wanted to know.
"Well... um... I know! A while ago my razor broke and I haven't bought a new one yet!" Jarod announced triumphantly.
"Oh really?" Jamie eyed his clean-shaven face suspiciously. "Then you either do not have any growth of beard anymore or you... oh my god! Please don't tell me you used mine!" she yelled, horrified.
Jarod suddenly grew cautious. "Would that be very bad?"
"Oh yeah that's gross! I demand a new shaver and a year's supply of blades and shaving foam as compensation for just another trauma you have inflicted on me!"
"Oh don't be such a diva!" Jarod complained. "But you happen to be lucky. I have been preparing for my next pretend and bought this!"
From the shopping bag he had dropped to the floor earlier, he pulled a still packaged lady shaver.
"Please don't tell me what you were going to use that for!" Jamie commanded, then snatched it from him. "My life is busy enough!"
"But you might find it quite interesting. Really. This time it's something especially difficult and you might be able to help me when I..."
That was when Jamie covered both her ears with her hands and gave a loud rendition of Rhianna's "Disturbia" until Jarod finally gave up.
"Mom, that evening was just fantastic!" said Catherine when they entered the living-room and sat down on the leather couch.
"Well, if you hadn't been flirting with the waiter all the time..." Miss Parker said, the comment accompanied by a wide smile. Catherine interrupted her:
"ME? That was you!"
"Maybe it was the both of us..." her mother mused in a conciliatory mood, so that Catherine nodded to that compromise.
"You're right, mother. That really helps me forget the rest of this dreadful day."
Both Miss Parkers simultaneously got rid of their stiletto heels that were far to high for comfort and sank back into the pillows.
"It won't be a problem to restore the blouse to its old glory. Broots is going to get it to the dry cleaner's tomorrow," Miss Parker said with a content grin.
"Don't you think he's a little overqualified to do the job of a housekeeper?" her daughter asked, playing their usual game.
"Any why should I get myself an annoying, demanding old witch who wants money from me and tries to criticize my housekeeping if he does all the dirty work just because I terrify him?" she asked and reached for the wineglasses.
Catherine, who had been trained in this field for years, opened the wine bottle in a fluent movement.
"Maybe he's sweet on you?" she asked, grinning while she poured the chilled liquid into their glasses.
"If he is it is all your fault. If you hadn't burst into my office back then he would still be oblivious to the fact that I am a loving mother in my freetime."
"Ha! Loving!" Catherine said pointedly. "I dare to challenge that. I am allowed to drink in public places although I am underage and if the waiter objects- which they do seldom enough because you allow me... no encourage me to wear too much make-up- you finish them off!"
"I am the coolest mom in the world," Miss Parker said, satisfied with herself and toasted her daughter. "And I am loving! I carried you around in my arms for hours when you were a baby and I even - I do not want to remember - changed your diapers."
Catherine quickly took a large sip of the wine and wondered what she could say to prevent her mother from elaborating any further on the subject.
"I really liked the moment when I came in and Broots was baffled when I called you 'Mom'. How could I have known that you had never mentioned me?"
Miss Parker looked down at her perfectly pedicured feet and wiggled her toes.
"How are you supposed to terrify people properly if you have a teenage daughter at home? When he came running in when I was on the phone with you, discussing your pocket-money, I had to tell him you were the disturbed woman from the traveling-agency."
"Disturbed, alright... but traveling-agency? You should have really come up with something more fitting. Cheers!"
~to be continued~
We'd just love to hear whether you liked it. :-)
Coming soon: Chapter 2 in which annoying secretaries turn up and new pretends are being started