First Impressions
(or, how many words can be used to describe a seemingly haughty Elf)
Summary: Legolas arrives at Imladris, and meets Aragorn (adult) for the first time. Aragorn does not like the first impression he gets. Aragorn POV.
Note: This is NOT intended to be serious, in any shape or form. Pure, crass fun was had while writing this.
The Elf that had just arrived looked much too uptight for my tastes, but both Elladan and Elrohir had sworn that he was a very amusing Elf. I have learnt not to trust them, and it seemed as though this would not be an exception to that rule.
'Legolas, well met!' Elrohir said with a huge smile and arms opened in the expectation of a hug, but the stuck-up Elf merely pressed his hand against his chest in greeting.
Obviously, this stumped my brother, and he let his arms fall to his side.
'What is wrong?' Elrohir asked suspiciously, and the arrogant Elf called Legolas looked at him with a glare. I did not like this Elf very much.
'Why do you expect that there must be something wrong?'
'Usually you are all over me when you visit.' My brother said impatiently and moved in on the haughty Elf, presumably to check him for injuries.
'I am well, Elrohir.' The snooty Elf said, calmly holding up his hand to fend off my brother's well intentions. 'Move now, so I may go to my quarters and retire.' No, I did not like this Elf very much at all.
'Retire?' Elrohir exclaimed in surprise. 'It is but midday!'
'Aye, and I am weary.'
'Never did I think that I would say this, Legolas, but you are acting much like an aged human.'
The prissy Elf gave a distasteful snort, still standing with his chin held high just so. I did not believe that he had moved his head an inch since I first saw him ride up.
'And you are acting much like an elfling!' The prim Elf retorted with a sneer.
Elrohir opened his mouth to reply, when something came flying in my peripheral vision, directly towards the blond, prudish Elf, and I called out a warning. It was pure reaction on my part, had I taken a second to contemplate, I might have skipped calling out a warning and would have just watched the stuffy Elf get a pinecone or two in his hair.
I should not have worried however, for the conceited Elf apparently had the reaction time of a turtle, and was moving his entire body to look towards me when the cones hit him in the face. He closed his eyes and set his jaw tight, obviously very upset.
'You were supposed to duck, Legolas!' Elladan squeezed out while laughing. I would not have been surprised if he would have been lying on the ground, rolling around, rather than standing up bent in half as he tried to control himself.
'Apparently, there are two elflings here.' The snobbish Elf said tightly and took a step forwards to get away from my brothers.
'What is wrong?' Elladan asked suspiciously then, and Elrohir began to laugh, and the stiff Elf took a deep breath and just looked rigid as he refused to move his head.
At which point a thought came to me. But he was an Elf, and that never happens to Elves… does it?
'He's got a crick in his neck.' I said out loud, deciding that it probably could happen, but I got three equally surprised stares sent in my direction.
'Really?' Elrohir asked suspiciously, and moved in on the supercilious Elf, wrapping one hand around the Elf's shoulder and put his other on the Elf's head. 'Does this hurt.' He asked and, in my opinion, gently moved the hand on his head to make the pompous Elf's head move.
'Aaaa!' The ostentatious Elf screamed and ducked to try and get away. Elrohir simply moved his hand from the Elf's head and onto his other shoulder.
'Do Elves really get cricks in their necks?' I asked then, still feeling confused about that particular fact.
'No.' The puffed-up Elf answered.
'Apparently this one does.' Elladan answered, obviously highly amused as he was now sitting on the ground, still laughing wildly.
'Do not!' the high-class Elf muttered but screamed again as Elrohir began to massage him. 'Are you trying to kill me?' He called angrily and fell to his knees in an attempt to escape my brother's touch. His actions right now were certainly not those of a pompous, haughty, ostentations, snobbish, and any other word you could come up for it, Elf, but rather those of an Elf in pain, and I began to revise my belief. Maybe I should give him the benefit of the doubt.
'I could certainly find other ways to kill you rather than giving you a massage.' Elrohir grinned. 'I am merely trying to help. Get back here.'
'Help?' The forma… Legolas said suspiciously, but sat back on the heels of his feet, allowing Elrohir access to his neck again. 'I see not how touching my neck will help.'
'Trust me.' Elrohir said smugly, and I rolled my eyes.
'I would not trust you with even a tree, Elrohir.' Legolas said and I chortled in surprise. So I was not alone in having learnt such a lesson. It seemed I might have a lot to talk about with this Legolas character after all.
'You wound me so, Legolas.' My brother continued and pressed his thumb against Legolas' neck, making him shout once more in pain.
'You enjoy this far too much.' Legolas grumbled, and Elrohir just cackled evilly as he kept pressing against the spot on Legolas' neck when suddenly we heard a crack and Elrohir removed his hands.
'Crick in your neck, Legolas?' Elladan roared loudly, finally having abandoned any pretense of control, and was lying curled up on the grass, tears rolling down his face as he laughed.
Legolas rolled his head tentatively on his shoulders before he turned to Elrohir in amazement.
'How did you do that?'
'Magic.' Elrohir answered with a smirk, wiggling his fingers in front of Legolas' face.
'So… Elves are not immune to cricks in their necks?' I asked finally, still not quite having gotten my head around that part yet.
I rolled my eyes when they all stared at me for a second before the laughs started again, this time from everyone, even Legolas.
Maybe he was not quite as haughty as I had thought.
Note: I humbly apologize for this one ^_^ I have had a crick in my neck for the last week, and this just flew into my head on the bus from work today :D
-yaruna