After All
AN: Yeah, it's a bit odd. Fun to write, though. Read and review, please! And no flames!
I thought I was in love with Harry Potter – it seemed obvious, until now – but seeing Harry Potter didn't give me this hopeful, light, floaty feeling inside. Seeing Harry Potter smile didn't brighten my whole day. Seeing Harry Potter frown didn't summon dark storm clouds to hang over me. And when Harry Potter talked to me I didn't feel like he was the most important person in the world.
Gilderoy Lockhart was obviously the one for me.
I started to put hearts above my 'I's, instead of dots. I read all his books, memorised them, and started quoting them to my classmates. I wrote home to Mum that she couldn't fancy Gilderoy – wasn't allowed to fancy Gilderoy – because he was going to be mine.
And then came the Chamber of Secrets. The Memory Charm. The Weakness Revealed.
It was as though a hand had come along and carefully scooped out all thoughts about how wonderful Gilderoy was. He made me feel sick. When he smiled in that vague, helpless way, I wanted to slap him. When he frowned, I wanted to spit in his face. And when he spoke to me, I wanted to stick my fingers in my ears and hum very loudly.
Whereas when Harry Potter smiled, he cheered me up and made me blush with pleasure. When Harry Potter frowned, I felt as though I should fix whatever was wrong, and blushed with frustration when I couldn't. When Harry Potter spoke to me, I knew he thought I was important and held me as an equal, whereas I could see now that Gilderoy had always treated me like a baby. He had behaved like my older brothers.
And I realised that it was Harry I loved, after all.