Shira's Cryin'

Chapter 1

He knew that he heard something. It was something that made him more anxious to find than it was trying to find a meal when he was half starved to death.

Something, anything that could take his mind off of how completely messed up his life was.

Ever since that day it all happened. Ever since. He hasn't been the same.

Sniffing at the ground numerous times again, he was sure he was getting closer. He was so determined, so anxious to find out what that sound was.

'God, ever since it all happened, I just haven't been the same!' The golden furred cat thought to himself.

'I'm just looking for something.' He says, lifting his head off the rather grassy ground below him, cutting out the trail that he's been following. He tried holding in his tears of pain, tightly closing his eyes to rid of them.

'I'm looking for a change in life. But... Everyday just goes by, as if they had no purpose, and that's all that it's ever going to be.'

Now he let his tears fall down his face. The only good part was the fact that it was raining. It hid the sadness in his eyes and on his face. For some strangest of reasons, he enjoyed the rain. It was depressing. The stormy clouds giving a dull gray color, and also giving every other feature of the land the same dull and gloomy color. It was as if everything around the saber tooth was crying. Crying with him. All the plants that brought life to the earth, and all the trees that reassured protection throughout the land. They all had rain drops dripping off of them, and so did he.

'They're all crying with me.' He says, and couldn't help but let a small smirk come across his face.

'Crying. For me.' He shook his head, ridding himself of his insane thoughts. Ever since that day, he just hasn't been the same. Ever since.

He was only a cub when it happened, but in fact, it's been happening his whole life. He was abused as a cub. It made him scared. It made him shy. Yet, he was unwilling to do anything about it. His spirit was broken, and he made no effort to changing his life. But how was he to blame for his life? It was never his fault, or at least that's what he's been trying to tell himself.

Seven years ago, when the golden saber was still a cub, his life was never what he expected, and if he couldn't do anything about it, then who'd thought it would happen?

That night. The night that changed his life from suffering to just plain hell. He'd rather be dead, but he couldn't be. He couldn't show weakness to the world.

A dark stormy night brewed upon the land, and like every night, the same old thing happened.

"You pathetic excuse of a predator! You never do anything right, you useless piece of fur!"

It was just one thing after another. Being yelled at constantly by his want-to-be "father", the golden cub never got a chance to see how the world really was, and how great his life could have been.

He could remember it all so well. All the ear-piercing yelling, those death staring eyes, observing every little mistake he made even if it wasn't really anything. It was just one more excuse for his father to beat the living day-lights out of him. It all changed his view on the world, and the perspective of himself.

Most nights would result in him getting no amount of sleep due to all the bruises, cuts, scars, and bite marks that were crawling all over his body. It wasn't just the outside that caused it. His memory of the previous events that caused those injuries were corrupting his mind. Time and time again he would often lose the ability to breath. Something that his father did to his wind pipe due to an overly pressured bite on his neck caused him to have these breathing problems. It did heal over time, but what did it matter?

His scars will heal, but his pain will not.

This kind of thing would happen almost every day for him. He became isolated from the world. He never talked to anyone, and he hardly talked at all. As he became older, he realized more and more that he shouldn't have to live this way. He deserved better. He deserved something else. He just didn't know what that something was.

'I'm sick of all this sorrow, and all of this pain I have to put up with every night and ever day. Why can't I just fall in a hole and die?' He'd often think these thoughts to himself on a nightly basis.
He felt his shoulders become more and more swollen as his father kept clawing at him, pushing him around the cave, and smashing his head against the wall. To the golden saber, no amount of clawing and biting can make him feel any worse. How could his father possibly put him in any more pain than he's already in?

Soon, the defenseless saber could taste his own blood from his lips, and no sooner was he pissing up blood from his mouth. His vision was so unclear. He could feel himself getting shoved around, but he couldn't see it. He kept his eyes closed because of instincts.

One after another, hits after hits were impacted upon him, he tried to fight back, but his fatigue got the better of him, and he really didn't see any point to trying. He was so low.

"Why am I the one you hate?!" The gold furred cat yelled at his attacker.

"You are a god damn mistake! You should never have been born! You were an accident you lazy, pathetic son of a bitch!" His fathers anger got the best of him. He was never the best at controlling it, and over the years, it only got worse and worse.

Just hearing that phrase, "You son of a bitch!", pierced the sabers heart. He never knew his mother. She killed herself when he was just a baby. He never had any memories of her. His father would always say that it was his fault that she killed herself. How she did, he never knew, and he never wanted to.

The biggest question that was enveloping his mind was; Why is life so bad? It doesn't have to be this way.

Of course, the saber had no idea how others lives were like. He just assumed that everyone and everything had the same damn life.

Having these thoughts in him, he completely forgot what was going on to begin with. He finally recalls himself having the shit beaten out of him as his father continued to abuse him. It was that old. Eventually the golden saber got so use to his father beating him up every day that he could basically ignore the pain and screams that were being shot at him. Not that it helped much, but still.

At last, he begins to notice that the punches that were being thrown at him were getting lighter and weaker.

'God, I'm like a freaking punching bag to this guy'

He sees his dad start to walk away, but still cussing under his breath.

"What... Do you want... From me?" The now abused saber quietly said, just loud enough for his dad to hear.

His dad turned back around, with his glaring eyes, and his burning red face. His sweat could be smelt from his "workout", and his claws were gripped in rage.

"I want you gone. I hate you! I never wanted you! No one cares about you! You shouldn't even exist!"

"How is this my..."

"Why are you still here?!" his dad interrupts with rage building back up inside.

"Because... There's no where else to go."

"That's exactly the point. There's no where else you can go. So just go! Get the hell out of here, and find somewhere else to cry yourself to sleep , you wimpy cat!"
No rage built up inside of the gold saber. It was over. It was done. It was better to do nothing than to do anything.

"Your lousy mother would want the same thing."
He didn't want to, but he just couldn't help but believe it. He had to. Maybe his father was right. That's what he's been forced to believe for his entire life. His father was always right. Who would want a waste of a life like him?

'Misery! Misery! That's all I see out of my eyes! Does anyone else see it that way?!'

That night, while his dad was asleep, he left. He never went back. He was done. He's been done for a very long time. So long, that it felt as if it never should have happened in the first place.

'Why me?'

'Why anything?! Why do you even exist?!' His mind told him. The saber became so insane over the years of anxiety, that he eventually started hearing voices inside of his head.

'Why is the world like this?'

'Because you choose to make it like this.'

'Bullshit! I never decided to be born into this disaster that was waiting to happen!'

He was starting to lose it even more so. It was at the break of dawn on the island as the sun began to rise. The saber never got any sleep that night wondering aimlessly for an unknown period of time, which was typical, as every night was basically the same thing.

The saber had no idea how far he's traveled out in the middle of nowhere, and he honestly didn't care.

'Anywhere better than back there in that hellbent shit hole.'

'Always thinking in your point of view, huh?'His other mind spoke up.

'What do you expect?'

'A lot more than what you're doing now, wondering and getting absolutely nowhere.'

'What can I say, I live life the best I can.'

Thinking to himself always made him feel somewhat better than before.

The sun became more and more noticeable, and the heavy rain slowly settled down. The wet grass below him soaked his paws like a sponge. Never has so much rain taken over the green land that was bestowed upon the gold saber. The skies beyond the oceans horizon was a mixture between orange and red, much like the color of the leaves in the fall season.

It was only then and there that he started thinking about how far he's actually traveled. He hasn't eaten in about three days because of his severe depression.

'Would it be better if I just starved to death?'

For some reason, his other voice didn't answer back this time.

Time passed on, having no potential or meaning to the saber as he walked forth through the trees that he knew so well and yet hated so much.

'I need to get out of here. Far away from here. I can't be reminded of my past. I need to let go. I have to. I need to.'

'But what are you going to do? Do you ever think about the future?' His voice chips in again.

'I only think about the present.'

'The present. How's that going for ya?'

The saber lets out a growl of frustration as he knows how messed up his life is. Since day one he's been shoved in the wrong direction. Every day since he's been one step closer to complete insanity. His father always giving him the wrong idea of how life is, the constant teasing the other young sabers in his family would give him just to bring him even lower. The ironic thing is, all of those sabers don't exist anymore. They all died from a dreadful disease, and the golden saber could do nothing but watch in horror as one by one, another soul would departure from the world, leaving a bigger hole in the saber's heart each day. Bullies or not, they were his brothers. Not all of them were complete assholes. He remembered him. His only friend.

'Why do you fight with them?'

'With who?' The golden saber asked his little brother that night when the rest of the family was out hunting while the weakest members stayed and kept watch over the cave. It was the last night he'd ever see him. He was so young. So naive.

'Our brothers. Why do you have to? Why do they have to?' The cub said with tears in his eyes. It was a look of fear that appeared on his face.

'We don't have to, we just-'

'Then why do it?' He interrupts.

'Listen Shulk, I don't choose to fight with them. They're the ones who start it. I try to resist, but they just want to test me and see how long I can withstand them.'

'But we're a family. We shouldn't have to.'
Hearing the cub say that word, family. It brought a warm feeling to the older sabers heart.

'Diego?'

'Yes?'

'Why is life so bad?'

That was the last sentence that came out of his mouth as their father and the rest of the brothers, all four of them came home. Diego never spoke around his father, so he didn't respond to Shulk's question.

Little did he know that the next morning, Shulk would die from the disease. His only friend. His only chance to happiness in this world. It was never meant to be. Fate has conspired against him.

As the saber continued through the forest, thinking about his little brother, he was about to break down of all sanity that was still hanging on to his mind, but he didn't.

'I can't give up. But still...'

A faint sound could be heard further into the forest.

'Why is life so bad?'

The sound came again, only more clear this time. It was from right behind some tall, dry grass.

The saber looked over, and narrowed his gaze at something that he just couldn't believe.