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Temporal Loop

Chapter 1

Stardate 64116.4

32 years after Voyager's encounter with the Caretaker

"Damn it, Kathryn! Don't do it! Just tell Starfleet Command to go to hell!"

Kathryn blinked, surprised by the force in his voice. "That's a tempting idea, but not very practical you know. It's not like I'm in the Delta Quadrant anymore. They do have the ability to compel me now." Kathryn got a quizzical look in her eyes. "I don't believe that you have ever told me to do something so forcefully before. When did you get to be so blunt?"

"Just now. Nevertheless, I'm willing to bet that I have said the exact same thing whenever you happened to ask my opinion on this matter."

Kathryn smiled ruefully. "It's not in those logs, but I bet that I have asked your opinion every time. What's the use of having a friend in the Questor Group if I don't bother to pick his brain every once in a while?"

Mark gave a crooked smile that could still stir Kathryn's heart, even after all these years. "Another fantasy shattered! If I'd known that you were only interested in my mind, I never would have asked you to marry me."

How long had it been since Kathryn engaged in a little flirting? After twenty-five years, the game felt awkward, but she gave it a go anyway. "A lifetime ago, I had very little interest in your mind." Mark rewarded her efforts with another heart-breaking smile.

"You're changing the subject. I posed your question to all the members of the Questor Group—theoretically, I mean—," Mark added quickly, after noticing Kathryn's wince,"–and every one of them agreed that you should refuse to go on this mission. It is not in your best interests or in the best interests of your crew. This mission might even pose a danger to the universe as a whole, though there was no consensus on that particular question."

Kathryn was shaken by the knowledge that Mark had discussed this "theoretical exercise" with anyone else. Nevertheless, she pressed him, unwilling to sidetrack the main issue again. "So tell me what you think. Do you think that the universe is better served by creating a multitude of Borgless universes, or by just one time line plagued by the Borg?"

"It's not that simple, Kath. According to these logs, you have already created at least eight alternate universes. And that is not counting the times that you did not keep a log of your actions, or failed to pass logs along to a younger self, or in which you failed, or in which you did not live long enough to go back in time, or–"

"Or I simply refused to go," Kathryn interrupted him wistfully. "Any decision I make is going to alter the timeline, isn't it?"

Mark sighed, wondering how anyone as intelligent as Kathryn had ever gotten herself into this mess to begin with. She rather wondered that herself. She didn't have a log for the first time she went back in time, so she had no idea what she may have been thinking. If she thinking.

Kathryn had never told anyone, not even Chakotay, that her future self was passing logs on to her younger self. She well remembered the shock of finding those logs twenty-six years ago. Lord, had it really been that long ago?

Stardate 54991.7

7 years after Voyager's encounter with the Caretaker

Two days ago, the universe changed. Admiral Janeway had destroyed the Borg Queen with Icheb's neurolytic pathogen, and Captain Janeway couldn't be happier about it. Even if the Borg managed to recover from the loss of their Queen, and Kathryn had no idea whether they would or not, they certainly would not be able to rebuild the Transwarp Corridors. According to Seven, the civilization that had built the Corridors had lost the knowledge needed for their construction centuries before they were assimilated. The Borg had used the Corridors to devastating effect for decades, but never learned how to build more Corridors themselves. Even if the Borg survived, they were scattered throughout the Universe, unable to regroup for attacks or repairs. Each Cube was now isolated, and therefore vulnerable. Kathryn grinned as she thought about the thousands of civilizations that had suffered at the hands of the Borg, and who would now be able to avenge themselves upon those mechanical monsters. Most satisfying.

Kathryn wasn't a complete humanitarian, however. She was not above feeling a more personal satisfaction. Voyager's crew hadn't been able to make it all the way to the Alpha Quadrant before the Corridors collapsed, but they had found a convenient exit aperture in the Beta Quadrant. They were now just eighteen months away from Earth, and four months away from a rendezvous with a Federation deep space exploration vessel. After seven years, her crew could manage that time on their heads.

All of a sudden, Kathryn grinned again as she remembered her conversation with the captain of the Yokogawa. Captain Arnold had claimed to be delighted that his ship was being diverted to meet her, but he couldn't quite hide his pique that the Yokogawa would be passing through territory that Voyager had already explored. He had gone to the Beta Quadrant in order to see things that no human had seen before and he was envious that Janeway had seen much more than he had.

Arnold could keep his envy. He didn't understand how precious the familiar was. No one could possibly understand that unless they had been cut off from everything they knew for an indefinite period of time. Like say, oh, seven years. Just four more months, and then Kathryn would be in charted territory again. Most of Voyager's trip had been made without the benefit of reliable star charts. Or with any charts at all, for that matter. In 120 short days, she would be in an area of space that another human being had already seen, and it felt good. It was even better to know that she was no longer alone.

She wondered whether the Yokogawa had any real coffee beans on board. She would ask Arnold the next time she talked to him. 120 days until real Colombian coffee. Now that was something to count down.

With a sigh, Kathryn went back to reviewing Voyager's endless efficiency reports. Yes, they were close to home now, but that didn't change the fact that Voyager was in a completely unfamiliar sector of the Beta Quadrant. They didn't know anything about the local politics or cultures in this part of space, so they needed to be ready for anything. Of course, with the armor plating and transphasic torpedoes that they had received from the future, she wasn't too worried. Nevertheless, it never hurt to be too careful. That was why she was reluctant to trade for fuel or supplies until she knew the neighborhood a bit better. If things were going to get tight again, then they might as well start conserving now. Which meant, of course, that she needed to wade through the damn efficiency reports. Ah well. She had managed to avoid looking at them since Admiral Janeway's arrival last week, but she couldn't put them off any longer.

Among the PADDs she expected to find, she came across sixteen that didn't belong. They were obviously highly compacted, and just as obviously, encrypted. She started to call Tuvok, to ask him how someone had managed to slip them into her desk, but stopped herself when she noticed that one of the PADDs had a note on it in plain text. It read:

"Dear Captain Janeway,

If you are reading this, then I have finally had my chance to destroy the Borg. I wonder if it was as fun as I thought it would be twenty-six years ago, when I was reading from a PADD like this. I guess you will find out twenty-six years from now, when Starfleet Command sends you back in time to destroy the Transwarp Corridors. (Oh, by the way, that was the mission. I am the residence expert on myself, and I determined that I would only do what I was told not to do. You had to believe that it was your idea to destroy the Transwarp Corridors if you were going to put in your best effort. Sorry to manipulate you like that, but that actually is what we do best.)

You know that you will have to go back, don't you? We have brilliantly managed to place ourselves – and Voyager – in a temporal loop. Some me, in some alternate universe, decided to destroy the Borg with technology from the future. Starfleet Command likes the fact that the Borg are no longer able to traverse the Corridors to the Alpha Quadrant (hell, who doesn't?), so now they keep sending me back to do it over and over again. I know that I have gone back at least seven times before this turn, but Mark thinks it is probably more than that. Much more.

The problem is, I never seem to do it exactly the same way. No matter what I, Admiral Janeway, say or do to convince you to destroy the Transwarp Corridors, the decisions about how to do it always belongs to you, Captain Janeway. And since you never seem to do it the same way twice, a new timeline is created every time I go back. This means that I have created an unknown number of alternate universes, and that each one is putting stress upon the space-time continuum. You will see for yourself what I mean when you read these the PADDs that I have left for you.

These PADDs contain logs, both ship's and personal, for the twenty-six years that have passed since I was you. Seven of us have carried these logs forward (or backward, rather) and given them to an earlier version of herself, and now I am giving those logs to you, along with my own. (I strongly urge you to keep these logs to yourself, because Starfleet Command would probably court-martial you if they knew you had them. Court-martial you, confiscate the logs, and then send you back anyway. Lord, I loathe them!) As you will see, each future is roughly the same for the universe as a whole, but is vastly different for the members of Voyager's crew. It all depends on which exit aperture you took.

Oh, I know. You have no intention of reading these logs. Don't want to affect the future. The Temporal Prime Directive, and all that bullshit. It's all very Starfleet, and I know that you even believe it at this point in your life, but you can't kid yourself (that means me) forever. Eventually, you will read them and you will act upon them. You will try to circumvent the writing in the logs to make the universe a better place for your crew, and thus create a brand-new alternate universe. God, this all gives me such a headache! Still, in order to give you some piece of mind, I have encrypted the logs. Now you won't be tempted to look at them until you really need an answer to some specific question. Since I came up with the encryption code, I have complete confidence that you can crack it when you are really ready to put your mind to it. Besides, I have cracked it before.

One final note: I lied when I said it was good to get to know the younger version of me again. I suspect that I always lie about that. You are unbearably self-righteous, a total control freak and a complete pain in the ass. I remember how much I hated meeting the older version of me when I was your age, but believe it or not, I hated meeting the young me even more. And maybe that is the real reason that none of the Kathryn's I've encountered ever wind up happy. I hope that you are the exception. Take care of yourself, and take care of our crew.

— Admiral Janeway