A/N: Hello! I'm back with my second story. :D I saw a writing prompt somewhere that said something like, "If you found a portal that would take you back to your biggest mistake and allow you to fix it, would you go?" and so BAM! A story was born. I immediately thought Raph and Leo (probs because their relationship is my favorite) and realized that Raph hadn't made a big enough mistake to need a magic portal yet... So, I wrote an AU! :D Mwahahahaha...

Ahem... Anyways

There is TEMPORARY character death, a little bit of language, mentions of blood and violence, etc. So, yeah. You've done been warned.

Also, I do not own them. Their lives would be a lot more interesting if I did, though.

Please read and review! :D

TBC

-Haley

"Don't do this, Raph."

"I'm done takin' orders."

In reality, the fight couldn't have lasted more than two minutes.

It felt like forever.

Every move and counter move was like a dance, each participant swapping positions of power as the fight went on-each trying to outdo the other. Yet within the first 30 seconds, there was a long pause. It was a pause in which both parties realized that this brawl could be going nowhere. These brothers were equals, trained under the same master for the same amount of years. Their strengths were unmatched by anyone's but each other's. Still, there was one difference between the two that would make for a critical turning point when all was said and done.

Raphael was very, very angry.

Even as younger charged at older, and then older at younger, Raph knew he was going to have to do better if he was going to take his brother down. Leonardo suddenly seemed to be on top of his game, moving so quickly that Raph barely had enough time to defend himself. It was when Leo had the gall to almost slice his katana through his younger brother's head that Raph lost it. It wasn't that Leonardo was trying to hurt his brother; Raph knew that. No, see, to Raph, it was just another way that Leo was rubbing in his face how much better he was. And that pissed Raphael off.

The pair found themselves at yet another standstill: Leonardo's blades were caught between the prongs of Raph's sai, and for the longest time, they just slowly circled each other, neither willing to give up their hold. The longer the brothers stood there, and the longer they glared into each other's eyes, the more Raphael felt his hatred for Leo growing.

"Hot head."

"...like some vigilante showboat..."

"YOU. AREN'T. READY."

"What were you thinking?"

"I'm better than you."

I'm better than you.

I'm.

Better.

Than.

You.

SNAP.

Raph was seeing red. He didn't register that Leo's katana were now broken in half; didn't notice the shock in his big brother's eyes. Raph didn't hear or see anything, and he definitely didn't think. He just... Did.

That is, until a painful cry broke through all the fury.

Once the crimson cloud faded from his vision, Raphael realized he was on top of Leo... How did that happen? There were Leo's broken swords, lying off to the side. But something was... Off.

Something was wrong.

It was then that he heard the sound of Leonardo's broken breathing. He focused on his brother and numbly realized that his own sai was sticking out of Leo's upper chest, right in between his heart and his shoulder. Did he do that?

Well, who else woulda done it, ya numbskull?

Raph suddenly felt the numbness fading and being replaced by sheer terror. This was something out of a nightmare-no, it was worse than that. There were no words, no... Anything for how horrifying this was. "Oh, God," he moaned.

Raphael may have just killed his big brother.

"Hang on, Buddy. I'm gonna getcha home and Donny and April will patch ya up. Just hang in there, Leo, please..."

Trekking through the sewers with your older brother on your back was no easy task, as it turned out; even if you were the strongest turtle in the family. It probably didn't help that Raph was still in his Night Watcher gear. His muscles were screaming out at him, begging him to stop and rest for a bit, but he couldn't. Not yet.

Although, if his legs gave out from under him (like they had almost done about 5 or 6 times now), he wouldn't have much of a choice.

Over the sound of his own heavy breathing, grunts of frustration, and pleas for Leonardo to just hang on, Raphael almost missed the sound of his big brother's way-too-quiet voice saying, "Raph, stop."

"No. I can't."

Just the slightest bit of authority came back to Leo's voice. "I've already lost too much blood and if you keep moving me, I'm just gonna go quicker. Raph, put me down."

Growling loudly in the face of defeat and exhaustion, Raphael dropped his brother and fell down right beside him. He heard Leo groan in pain and so he scuffled over to help Leo move so that his shell could lean against the sewer wall and he could sit up comfortably. Well, as comfortably as possible when there was a gaping hole in your chest. Raph felt sick at the thought.

Upon closer inspection, Raphael saw that Leonardo was right. His brother was a lot paler than he had been on the roof top and his eyes were losing life by the second. Now, Raph was no doctor, but he had a gut feeling that Leo didn't have much time left.

Raph pulled out his shell cell to call Donny. He wasn't to keen on revealing his identity as the Night Watcher, or on letting the others know that he'd stabbed their oldest brother, but Leo needed help and he needed it now. He'd accept whatever punishment came his way as long as Leonardo was okay.

That's why he was so shocked when a heavy green hand fell on the shell cell and pushed it down gently. Raph looked at Leo's face and saw something he'd never really wanted to see: resignation. Leo knew he was going to die. It made Raph angry. "The hell are you doin'?" He whispered harshly. Leo just shook his head.

"Th-there's not enough time," Leo gasped. "We're still a few miles from home, and I think I have a minute-two, at most, before-"

"Don't say it," Raph warned, desperately trying again to dial Don's number. He'd meant for it to come out all menacingly, or something, but instead it came out sounding strangled, like a choked sob. He silently cursed himself for it, but the fact was that he was more angry at himself for what he did than anything else. He knew good and well this wasn't Leo's fault.

He cursed aloud this time as the tears clouding his vision made it hard to see the tiny screen.

"Raph," Leo whispered. "R-Raph, l-look at me."

Slowly, reluctantly, Raphael raised his gaze to meet Leonardo's and allowed the arm holding the shell cell to fall limply to his side. Raph suddenly realized how badly his own eyes stung; how hard his shoulders and arms were trembling; how wet his mask was as it clung to his face. It was embarrassing, but he was too scared and angry to care. Leo's mouth twisted into a grimace as he clumsily clapped a hand on Raph's shoulder. Raph blinked in surprise, but listened intently as Leo opened his mouth to say something.

"I... I'm sorry, Raphael." Leonardo's eyes began tearing up a bit too, but Raphael said nothing. Instead, he heavily placed his own hand on top of Leo's, probably squeezing Leo's wrist much too tightly, but Raph figured that was the least of their concerns right now.

"I have...f-failed you both as a leader and a b-brother," Leo continued. "I let my pride b-blind me to what was r-right in front of me, and... If I could d-do everything over again, I..."

"I know," Raph interrupted as Leo suddenly broke into a fit of coughing. There was so much Raphael wanted to say-NEEDED to say-but he couldn't think of any of it right now. He was just... Trapped in a nightmare that he couldn't wake up from. "I know."

Once Leo's coughs subsided, he brought his other hand down from his mouth to reveal that he had been coughing up blood. Raph's stomach dropped. It wouldn't be long now. From the look on Leonardo's face, he knew it, too.

"Leo, I... I..."

"You don't need to s-say anything," Leo whispered. He was getting weaker by the second. "I... F-forgave you already... On the roof."

Raph froze.

Leo always had a way of knowing things about his brothers that he probably shouldn't. He knew where they hid things that they weren't supposed to have. He knew what they were thinking before they had a chance to say it.

Who would do that for them after tonight?

Wait... Raph was the oldest now, which put him in leadership position. But how could he be leader after murdering his own brother in cold blood? What was he supposed to tell his family? They would never forgive him, much less allow him to be leader. Hell, he'd never be able to forgive himself.

"Leo, I can't go home," he confessed brokenly. "The others, they'll... They'll hate me for what I did to ya." Leo just shook his head.

"Th-they're going to need you, Raphael. They can't lose t-two brothers at once."

Raphael was sobbing now in anger and self-hatred. This whole thing was so messed up. It wasn't supposed to be like this. None of this was supposed to happen.

Raph felt a gentle finger under his chin, lifting his gaze again to meet Leonardo's. This time, though, the look in his brother's eye was fierce, almost like he was his normal self... Almost.

"You h-have to go home and t-take responsibility for your actions," Leo warned sternly. "Promise me."

After a long moment, Raphael nodded. "Yeah, Leo... I promise."

Leo nodded before his body shuddered violently and the fire in his eyes dulled. Raph panicked, watching his brother go all too still. He gave Leo a shake. "Leo?"

Nothing.

No no no no no no no. "Leo. Leo! Wake up, bro, open your eyes. C'mon, you gotta wake up, Leo, please don't do this..."

It was no use. "Leo?!" No matter how many times Raphael called for Leo, no matter how hard he shook him, and no matter how loud he yelled, Leonardo was never going to wake up again.

No more pain-in-the-ass big brother to boss him around. No more late night/early morning talks after a long run. No more sparring, no more arguing, no more laughing, no more hovering...

No more Leo.

The realizations kept flying at Raph like arrows that struck him right in the heart, and so he did something he probably hadn't done in years. He gathered his big brother up in his arms, buried his face in Leo's shoulder, squeezed him as tight as he could, and then...

Raph screamed.