A/N: Special thanks to my beta LeighofOldStones.
Warning: Dub-Con, mentions of abuse, non-con
Chapter 1
We stole a stock of moon tea when the rumors from Gulltown reached us. Mya hid the stores deep within the trunks of the weirwood trees. We only hoped the weirwoods wouldn't be chopped down.
The Red Center was in the Gates of the Moon. The Warriors stood guard keeping the women inside. The first months were uncertain. I had been visiting Myra when they came to collect her. No one cared that I was Lord Baelish's bastard daughter. No one had ever believed him to begin with and no one cared that I was secretly a Stark. As the High Septon said "all the Starks are dead. And we no longer abide by the laws of Westeros." And so I was thrown into the rooms with all of the others.
The women in the Red center were not told of the outside world. Only months later did we learn of the building of the wall around the Vale, the declaration of the High Septon as sole ruler with each head of house his loyal vassals. Only after I became Bearer to Petyr Baelish did I learn that Myranda had been forced to marry him.
We spent our days praying, eating the slim rations we were given and trying to hide our fears from the Septas that walked among us. Then one day, a Frey arrived-one of the Waldas. We were only told the required term for her : "Aunt Walda". Aunt Walda had taken it upon herself to travel to the Eyrie when news of the rebellion of the faith had reached the Twins. She saw the profit of aligning herself with the High Septon and the Warriors and was allowed to lead in the creation of the Bearers.
That was what we were to become. The Bearers.
I pulled my shawl up tighter around my face and hair. The wind was blowing strongly and held the risk of another winter storm. Winter is Coming. Those words meant something to me once. Now they only have a faint ring of recognition. Bearer Redford came around the corner carrying a basket similar to my own.
"May the Seven bless you this day" she greeted me, as cheerfully as anyone could muster.
"May the Mother guide you," I replied, using the required greeting. Bearers were always required to travel in pairs to avoid any unwanted attention. We always walk in silence. I do not know if I can trust Bearer Redfort. We never know if we can trust anyone these days. Anyone can be a spy for the Church of the Seven and at any moment you could be punished for treason. Bearer Redford and I quickened our pace past the Warriors with their grim expressions. I kept my eyes down as we passed Lancel Lannister so that he would not acknowledge me; so far he had remained oblivious to all of the women as his vows require.
I had once thought the Lannisters beautiful but I had once thought a great many things. All of them foolish. We arrived at the market, which was busier than usual as all the households rushed to make their last purchases before the impending storm. Several stalls were already empty; winter has not been easy. I handed my ration coin over to the Septa outside the market and she passes me a few coins for meats and the last grains we would have until after trade with the Free Cities was able to resume again.
"Bearer Royce is with child again." I looked to where Bearer Redfort pointed. Bearer Royce had once just been a commoner, the youngest daughter of a farmer in the Vale. We were together at the Red Center. Her life began there, mine ended. She finally held a place above the average household servants.
Her confession still haunts me, I hate that they turned us against one another. We were made to sit in a circle surrounding a girl sitting on a stool. She was meant to confess to a time when her body was defiled by a man.
"I was walking home from the village after selling some eggs, when some men stumbled out of the tavern. They were drunk and it was only mid-day. I tried to walk past them quickly and kept my eyes down. They noticed me anyway and began to follow me down the path to my house. I was grabbed from behind by one of them. The other in the front ripped open my dress." Jenny's voice faltered for a moment. "They had their way with me on the path and then left me to collect the shreds of my clothes." Jenny stopped speaking and attempted to hold back tears. Aunt Walda looked at us all with a gleeful smirk on her face.
"Whose fault was it?" She asked us.
"Hers!" We chanted
"And why is that?"
"She asked for it!" We chanted back and continued the chorus of taunts claiming she led them on, begged for it by revealing the tips of her breasts or walking with a slight sway to her hips. Jenny started to cry within the first moments but that never stopped the words being hurled at her. All the while, Aunt Walda stood there with a tranquil and pleased expression on her face.
"Bearer Redford, Bearer Baelish! May the Seven bless you?" Jenny called out to us, an excited flush on her face. This was her second baby; if she produced another child for the Royce's she would be granted a life of luxury for the remainder of her days, or at least that's what Aunt Walda promised would befall her. But I don't trust the words of a Frey.
We were not supposed to be completing chores when pregnant; that was when the job passed on to the wife. The wife was a more coveted position than the Bearer. The Wife was both the Maid and the Crone in one. She was innocent and wise and meant to be kept that way. That was why we were the Mother, meant to bring the children into this world and provide them with milk before once again resuming the place between the Maid and the Father. Our duty was to bear children while the wife's duty was to run the family, organize the household and be a loving docile wife for her husband. By taking away sexual interaction between husband and wife, the High Septon believed he was creating a perfect family unit that was devoid of unnecessary temptations and creating instead an equal partnership that relied only on love. After all, the High Septon said only wanton women truly enjoyed sexual activities therefore it was one less duty for the Wife to perform.
Family duty honor. Those words meant something once too. But now there is no honor and my family is dead. Only duty remains and only duty can keep me alive.
Bearer Redford and I only remained for a few minutes to talk to Bearer Royce before we had to continue through our remaining errands. It was believed by the High Septon that idle chatter and lack of physical exertion would lead to infertility. I prefer the lack of chatter, it means I don't have to chirp out the pleasantries they want from me. If only the Hound could see me now, I truly am a little bird with her wings clipped.
We decided to walk past the Punishment Wall. I never know why Bearer Redfort proposes it each time, perhaps she is also hoping not to see a familiar figure, or perhaps she truly believes in the Faith of the Seven that the High Septon preaches and wants to see those who have been punished for their transgressions. The Punishment Wall is a segment of the Wall of the Vale that separates the Kingdom of the Vale from the rest of the Westeros. The wall is made of solid brick and supposedly raised by the Smith himself (more likely just the blood of the dissenters who were forced to work on its construction like slaves). The Punishment Wall is meant to remind us where we all stand and who is truly in power. Each week they place new bodies upon the hanging hooks with sacks over their heads. On each sack is an image showing their transgression. We never are able to see the heads; it helps to keep us uncertain of the whereabouts of our friends and family. We can never be certain if someone who ran away is dead or alive. It keeps us all in control.
None of the bodies today resemble Mya's. There is a large man who's head is covered by a sack with a drawing of a Weirwood tree. I manage to suppress my gasp and shudder; it would not do to show any emotion when faced with the Northern Gods. The other two bodies are less shocking. One is a female who had once been a prostitute. The other is a man who had robbed another. No Mya. I hear Bearer Redford accidentally let out a sigh of relief upon looking at the bodies. Her eyes show panic when she glances at me but I merely busy myself with my red shawl.
A horrible part of me wishes to see Mya's body upon the wall, and then at least I can know her fate with a certainty. She was my savior in the Red Center. When we first arrived the two of us clung to each other desperate for some solace. We kept reminding each other about the moon tea and that in the end we wouldn't have to give birth to any child that we did not want. We searched for Randa constantly during the first days until finally we asked one of the kinder Septas. She was the one who informed us of the union between the Royces and Petyr Baelish. Apparently they had known all along what the future would be and had decided to wed the two houses so there would be fear of forced marriages and uncertain future alliances. The Royces and Petyr feared they would not be spared from their past discretions and chose to marry in accordance with the High Septon's new marriage policies to secure his favor. And as the Septa said "May the seven bless them. They honored one another and Lord Baelish did not spoil his wife." I thought I was going to be sick. Randa had known for some time what of all our futures held and yet she never bothered to spare us.
Something broke in Mya the day we were chosen. Perhaps it was the knowledge that she no longer was her own person and would forevermore be Bearer Arryn or perhaps it was the betrayal of trust. Whatever it was, she became a shell of her former self. For the next several days she moved about in a daze, no longer whispering to me in the night about how we would escape. She no longer mocked Aunt Walda's false sincerity. She merely existed. Then after a week, she shook me awake and announced that she was leaving. But I couldn't go with her. She needed to go alone.
The next morning, we all awoke to one of the Septas screaming over a naked body. Mya had killed them and snuck out in her clothes during the night.
I often dream that she is safe and far away from here. That she made it to the outside of the Vale and she went find help for us all. That she will return with an army of knights ready to liberate us. But I know that it is a foolish dream. Most likely she was killed by one of the Warriors before she ever made it to the Gate.
Once Bearer Redford and I pass the outskirts of town, we separate and walk to our own residences. We bid our farewells and as always acknowledge meeting the following week if the weather allows. I rush inside to escape the biting winter wind and thaw out in the warmth of the keep.
Once indoors, I must be even more on my guard. No one can be trusted even in the confines of the keep. Myranda used to be a friend; I thought I could trust her against all the evils of the world. But she did her job as a wife diligently. She was always present for every ceremony stone lipped and oftentimes jealous of my position with Peter. The last time we spoke outside of our designated roles was before I was sent to the Red Center.
Maester Coleman was my only ally. On the first week of my installment at the Gates of the Moon, I paced my small room incessantly. It was Maester Coleman who first came to see me and check on my health. He knocked gently on the door and when I let him in, he barred it behind him.
"I'm only here for a moment. Sansa, I should have known Baelish would choose you from the start."
"My name isn't Sansa"
"Of course not" He smiled and handed me the moon tea leaves "I got them from the weirwood trees. I added my own stash there too. I am on your side. One day I will make sure you are saved from here."
"I've been promised salvation before, only to be taken some place worse." Maester Colemon eyed me solemnly and moved to embrace me in a hug but when flinched he stopped himself.
"I will try not to disappoint but it will not happen this winter. The Vale is inaccessible now." He slowly opened the door and looked down the hallway and whispered, "I promise" once more before he left my room.
He has yet to fulfill his promise but winter has not ended yet. Each month during my medical examination he refills my stash of moon tea leaves and informs me of the current events in the kingdom. His visits are my only reminder of who I once was and that a world exists outside of this glorified prison. True I had could move around my own chambers and I was allowed to access to the rest of the castle with one of the household staff (to avoid any unwanted encounters with males) but outside of that I was stuck in the confined created for me by the High Septon. Sometimes I would imagine that I really was a bird in a cage and one day I would fly away when my captors came to feed me. But I knew I would never run. At least not in the winter, not when there was war still being fought throughout the seven kingdoms and my lack of combat skills would be my doom. I was a defenseless little bird and would remain in my cage.
A blizzard came that night and howled outside my windows. Many times I dreamed of ending it all so that I would no longer be trapped. Tonight was one of those nights. The encounter with Jenny and the journey to the Wall had only served to remind me of my entrapment. I felt myself breaking inside and a small sob escaped my mouth despite my attempts to stifle my sinking state. If I allowed myself to cry once, I would never stop. I flung myself onto the bed with my face in the pillow and muffled a scream. Screaming always stopped the tears, it reminded me that I was angry, angry at them all and angry at myself for allowing this to happen. Arya would never have succumbed to this life. If only I could fly away to my sweet sister. If only she lived. I moved off of my bed and onto the floor where I pried a floorboard away from the others to reveal the scant amount of possessions I had managed to retain. The hiding space under the floorboard had taken weeks to create, I would pull at the wood until my fingers bled and my nails began to fall off. The rest of the household just assumed I was harming myself. The Septas has warned them that the Bearers would struggle to adjust at first. That we were not allowed any sharp objects or possible ways to escape our fate. My treasures were meager but among them was the last evidence I had of Mya's existence. She had left a note in the weirwood tree which Maester Coleman had brought to me. It was written in High Valerian-where she learned the language I will never know- but it translated to "don't let the bastards get you down". Whenever I was having a moment of utter loss and devastation I would read her last words to me and vow that I would not allow the bastards to get me down.
The blizzard stopped me from leaving the castle for several days. I passed the first few days pacing my room incessantly. On the fourth day I finally surrendered and asked the household servants to escort me to the parlor where the sewing needles were kept, and I began to work on a new piece. I worked for hours without thinking and dreamt of faraway lands that I wished to visit. It was only when the young servant cleared her throat and asked if I could return to my chambers for the evening that I looked down and saw my embroidery. Somehow while I was deep in my dreams of the lands across the Narrow Sea I had sewn an image of a small bird in a cage being watched by a Hound. The embroidered piece was far too familiar to look upon; I sighed and threw the piece into the fire and watched it smolder and burn. I refused to leave the sanctuary of my room for the remainder of the week.
The following week was my inspection before the conception ceremony. Maester Colemon came to my chambers after supper and had me undress. Usually the Wife was required to be present for the inspection but Myranda was late. Secretly, I hoped she would not show. But she arrived shortly after I disrobed. She stank of wine and could barely hold herself straight. She sat herself on the edge of my bed and leaned forward
"Tell me Alayne how do you manage to sleep on this terrible thing. It must be so different from the comfortable bed you used to have as Petyr's daughter" She slurred every word and swayed as she spoke.
"My name is not Alayne, my lady." I replied as I stared down at the floor.
Myranda snorted "Of course it isn't. Your name is Sansa Stark and you certainly fooled us all for a long time with that innocent baseborn lie you told. Well looks like you got to spend time in Petyr Baelish's bed after all."
"My name is Bearer Baelish my lady. I am no longer Sansa Stark; I left her behind at the Red Center along with all my allegiances and ties to anything outside of the faith of the Seven."
"Of course you did. Let's just get this stupid farce over with. We all know she's perfectly fit to bear children"
Maester Colemon nervously motioned for me to lay with my back on the bed and legs open so he could ensure that everything appeared healthy. As always I passed the exam and Maester Colemon bid me to redress. Myranda stood quickly and walked out of the room, the door slamming behind her.
I realized at that moment that I had been holding my breath.
"She must know about the tea leaves" I whispered
"If she does, she will never tell anyone. If anything she will merely help to encourage rumors that Lord Baelish is infertile. She is as trapped as you are and children will only worsen her imprisonment." He sighed.
"Be careful around her. She seems to be losing her grip. She's not as hardened by winter as you are my dear." He then left the room in a hurry. I bolted the door and removed one of my other treasures from beneath the floorboard, a small direwolf that had once been the clasp on a cloak. I held it tightly in my hand and wished that I could be with my family once again.
My dreams that night were filled with faces of my past. I dreamt I was in Winterfell, only it was the ashen ruins of the castle. All of the small folk and household staff was there to greet me as I walked through the gates. My father and mother stood at the steps to the Great Hall and smiled proudly at me as I walked to them. I fell into their arms and allowed them to hold for as long as possible until I was pulled away from them by another set of comforting arms, Robb's. He held me and told me that he was proud of all that I had fought through and that despite what everyone believed he was convinced that I was a Stark. Arya was next to him with her wolf at her side and she smiled at me as well. But then the scene dissolved and I was alone in the ruined castle with no one beside me but the bodies of the dead.
I woke the next morning tired with my mind in a haze. The servants entered my room after the morning chores to prepare me for the conception ceremony. I was bathed and cleaned until my skin felt raw from the scrubbing. My hair was placed in an elaborate fashion upon my head and I was dressed in my ceremony clothes. Unlike my daily rough spun grey dress with the red cloak, the ceremony dress was made of finer material. It was a lighter fabric and all red. After I was dressed, I was escorted to the Sept, where I was meant to pray to the statue of the Mother before the ceremony. I was expected to pray for fertility and conception of a child this evening. I decided not to fulfill that expectation. If the Mother truly listened to my prayers she would have never allowed me to be forced into the role of the Bearer. She would never have allowed me to be sold like a cow for breeding. She would have never allowed the High Septon to create this abomination of a kingdom. She would never have allowed Petyr Baelish to bring me here and she most certainly would never have allowed my father to die. I no longer trust the new gods. The old gods are the only ones I will follow with sincerity. There is no pretense that the old gods will save you from the horrors of the world. The old way is the hard way it is the way of the North and in the North, winter is always coming. There is no time for the fantasy of intervening gods. So instead I spent my day kneeling in front of the statue of the Mother and repeating my favorite songs in my head, after all prayers were no more likely than the songs to result in Mother granting me salvation from this wretched fate.
Around supper time a servant was sent to bring me indoors to have my meal with Lord and Lady Baelish. They were both not allowed to speak to me for it would take away from my piety. After the meal, Petyr lead us into the Lord's chambers where the rest of the household was gathered. Here we sang the Hymn of the Father and prayed together for the Mother and the Father to bless us all with a child.
The first time I cried the entire day. I was terrified. When the maids undressed me and brought me to the bed I had tried to cover myself with my hands. My entire body was shaking when Myranda lay behind me to symbolize my place between her and Petyr. The pain was unbearable and there was no warning or preparation when he entered me. I knew it would hurt but I never imagined the searing pain I felt as my body was forced to accommodate him. Thankfully he finished quickly but not before he made certain to completely enjoy himself. When he removed his member I saw that it was covered in my blood. He glanced down and actually looked appalled before regaining his composure and asking for something to cleanse himself with. He wiped himself off with a cloth that Myranda handed him and the two left me alone to tend to myself. An hour later, Maester Coleman came into the room to find me lying unmoved from the bed. He gently helped me to clean myself up and slowly move to my room.
The next Conception Ceremony, I was mildly more prepared. I knew I would experience pain and I knew what was expected of me. However, Petyr was unable to perform at the same level. He claimed that he was tired and he could not make his member function the way it should. The rest of the household was removed for a short period of time and Petyr reached for the wine. He drank straight from the pitcher of Dornish red and after he had drank his fill he called for the household to return. We completed the ceremony with Petyr finishing inside me my mother's name on his lips.
Tonight, as always, I was undressed by the maids who then removed themselves from the room and I lay between Myranda and Petyr. As always, Petyr's breath stank of sour wine. I was on display to Petyr who at times I could tell was staring at my breasts and even the maids who undressed me were intimately aware of my body. I always felt that I left my own body, I was never actually present during the ceremony; I was in a separate world from Petyr's naked body hovering over me and Myranda lying beneath me on the sheets. Instead I dreamed of a castle in the snow where I could happily lay beneath a man. It was the only coping mechanism I was capable of creating to survive the Conception Ceremony.
That night after I was allowed the change to clean myself, a young male cupbearer nervously entered the room. He could not have been more than two and ten and he looked petrified.
"I'm supposed to tell you to come to m'lord's study this evening." the boy stammered. "He said to take the utmost discretion for this meeting." The boy ran out of the room leaving me speechless.
What could Petyr possibly want from me? This was against the strict code of conduct between a Lord and his bearer. We were not allowed to communicate outside of the Conception Ceremony and we were most certainly not allowed to have private meetings in his study. I carefully made my way out of the Lord's chambers and returned to my own. I bolted the door and steadily began to pace the floor. How was I supposed to discretely go the study? Any household servant with a desire to move ahead in status would gladly tell the High Septon of my rule breaking. I could be hanged. What if it was a trick? What if Aunt Walda had heard I was not as pious as some of the other Bearers and wanted to test my loyalty? After all I had never seen that cupbearer before; he very well could have been placed in the household to watch me. After what felt like several hours of incessant worrying, I decided against going to Petyr's study and instead chose to go to sleep. I was woken a few hours later to a knocking on my door. I rolled over and looked out the window only to see complete darkness. I covered myself with a cloak and slowly opened the door. Petyr looked at me and smiled.
"You refused my invitation."
"you should not be here sir" I whispered barely wanting to acknowledge his presence.
"My new squire is watching the corridor. Even in these times loyalty can still be bought with gold. I only want to give you the chance to escape your chambers some evenings, perhaps on a forthnight? We could continue some of your education from before."
"Do I have a choice?" Petry chuckled
"it would make our monthly encounters more pleasurable for both of us, I will see you in my solar tomorrow evening" He shut the door but I remained frozen in front of the door. Had fate just someone become worse?
The next day, I was completely on edge. I could hardly finish my daily walk without shaking and when the evening finally came I could hardly keep the bile that was building in my throat down. The hallways were quiet and I was certain that each and every member of the house could hear my footsteps. When I finally reached Petry's solar I was terrified to knock, instead I opened the door and crept into the room. He was sitting in his chair with a strange wooden board in front of him.
"I'm glad you came to join me. Would you care to have a seat" he gestured to the chair across from him and I wearily accepted the seat.
"have you ever played cyvasse before? It's a very interesting strategy game and the rules are very simple. I thought it might be a nice way to break the tension during this first visit."
I learned the game quickly enough and after two games, Petry led me to the door and kissed my cheek.
"I hope you will be less nervous during our next visit."
The next visit proved to be much the same and it was honestly a relief to have some short time where I no longer had to fit into my role as bearer. Soon I began to look forward to my cyvesse games with Petry and soon we began to move away from the game and he would update me on the world around.
" The raven from Oldtown suggest that this winter will be one of the worse in recent memory. Already the autumn felt terrible and it only appears it will get worse. The High Septon has already secured a heavy trade alliance with many of the Free Cities and even with the Lysani smugglers. He believes that winter is not the time to worry about the sins of other countrymen. The land of the Eryie will still be good god-fearing people but we will have to eat and therefore deal with those we disagree with."
"What news of the war?" I would ask each time but always Petry would respond the same.
"The war no longer matters to us, Bearer Baelish. The Eyrie is its own country now and we have no need to know of the game of the thrones that lesser men play." It was his way of constantly reminding me of my placement.
The Maesters at Oldtown were correct about the winter though. The winter storms often disrupted almost all of the trade that entered into Gulltown and we would be unable to receive the normal rations for several weeks. I was granted the least amount of food by the Wife. The Bearers were supposed to be well fed but Randa had said since I was not able to bear children with sufficient food then there was no need for the rest of the castle to starve while I feasted like Queen Cersei herself. Soon time began to blend together and I realized it had been three years since winter had come upon us. My eighteenth name day had passed and I had hardly acknowledged the day, since that was when I first noticed my moon blood had no come.
At first I thought the monthly blood had failed to arrive because of my lack of food. Many women in the castle were complaining of a similar circumstance. But then over the course of the next several weeks, other complaints began to develop, my breasts were starting to feel swollen, I was tired every and my stomach was always upset. I could hardly manage to digest and maintain my daily ration. My body was steadily getting weaker but I only hoped I could somehow destroy the child in me by starving myself. However, my secret could not last long. I was out on my morning walk through the castle when I began to become increasingly dizzy and despite all my efforts to prop myself up against the wall, I must have fainted. When I came to, I was in my chambers with Maester Coleman and Myranda. My head was throbbing but I could hear the two of them talking.
"She must be two or three months along now. However, her diet has been lacking. She isn't eating enough to help the baby grow. Perhaps it would be wise to increase her meals."
"Do whatever needs to be done to save her and the baby. The High Septon has become suscipious of our loyalty of late. We need to prove to him that we can produce a heir."
I wished I could pray for an escape or for anything to spare me my fate but I knew there were no gods to
My belly was growing larger each day and when Aunt Walda had come to monitor my progress. She promised a future for me after the baby; a future where I would exist to only serve the High Septon. I could tell there was something strange occurring in the Eryie. The servants were giving me strange looks and whispers were stopped as soon as I walked past each of them.
One evening, when Master Coleman came to check my health. I locked the door and asked him the truth. I asked him what would become of me.
" I cannot lie to you Sansa. Things are complicated at the moment. You're half-brother Jon never truly was your brother. He was your cousin the child of Rhagear Targaryen and your brother's sister Lyanna Stark. He was born and destined from the start to fulfill a great prophesy. He crumbled the wall but only to save Westeros from the armies of the dead that came upon it. You remember the tales of the Others and the reason for the building of the wall?" I nodded remembering the tales from my childhood. "Throughout all of this time Daenary's Targaryen had been building an army and conquering the free cities with her three dragons. When she heard of the wall and of the war with others she rode on the backs of her beasts to save the kingdom. It is said that Jon Snow himself tamed one of her dragons and thereafter her heart. At least that is what the songs are singing. Now the Queen claims she owes Jon her kingdom. He has helped lead all of the Queen's armies against her foes throughout the kingdom and finally conquering Kings Landing. The Lannisters are all dead and those that once were loyal to House Lannister have revoked their loyalty and sworn themselves to House Targaryen. All of the lands of the Lannisters, including Casterly Rock have been given to those who have shown the Queen loyalty, including many smallfolk. The people love her and her husband greatly but she claims to have too much land to rule. She currently reigns over all of Westeros, as well as Slaver's Bay. She wants to grant the north to a true Northerner and declare them the King or Queen of the North. Rumors have reached her that you are being held in the Eryie and she has offered the High Septon the freedom of the Eryie to maintain its kingdom if you are given to her. But the High Septon has other ideas. Since Aunt Walda has told him of your pregnancy, he intends to grant your child to them instead and with the help of Petry Baelish therefore gain a strong foot hole in the North. He intends to expand his kingdom there as well. I cannot tell what your fate will be. You cannot remain Bearer to Baelish. The King would never allow for it. I have tried as hard as I could to arrange an escape for you but I cannot guarantee any safety, for you or the baby." The silence stretched on for some time once he had finished speaking. Finally I stood and moved towards the window. The land was still covered in snow but it was steadily thawing. The land would soon be able to yield crops and I would be able to hunt for food in the forests. My decision had been made quickly. I needed to leave. I turned to Maester Coleman.
"I can't be a hostage any longer. I must leave. If I die in the process at least I will die free. Don't let the bastards get you down."
