A/N: For the 3 next days, I will hopefully post 3-4 short stories. Comic-Con is near! TF2 Retired will not be updated the week of Comic-Con and the week after. Sorry, test, projects and quizzes for 2 whole weeks probably :c This is the 1st. I hope you ENJOY.

Disclaimer: Don't own TF2 or DMC, own only the plot.

(Not related to my story Pyro's Identity...mostly)

Pyro and Dante

Dante had just gotten home from his mission. Like every other mission, he had destroyed the target, home, and most importantly his clothes. Once he took a shower, a long relaxing shower that brought his mind to peace. Reading a magazine and slowly falling asleep on that giant chair, he barely heard a faint pop. He groaned and gotten his weapons, in search for the supposed demon that appeared. Looking in his backyard he had saw a person or thing in a flame suit talking to a bunny or at least communicating with it. Interested in this, he walks out making no sounds. Unfortunately the bunny ran, alerting the red suited person.

Turning around Pyro had thought a spy was here. Using his flamethrower, he tried to burn said Spy. Said Spy was unaffected by this. Pyro wonders and looks at the person. Said person was wearing RED, so he is teammate.

"Hudda hudda hudda?" Pyro asked the man.

"Hudda Hudda, what?" Dante was confused as ever. The flames had no effect on him. The man made gestures that meant he wants to write. Or something like that. Giving Pyro a piece of paper, Dante tells the Pyro to walk to his shop. Following the strange man, Pyro complies while writing something on the paper. Giving the man the paper, Pyro had looked at the dark corners for spies.

Dante had read everything on the paper and learned these things.

He or she is named Pyro.

is RED.

loves bunnies.

hates BLU.

loves bunnies.

and needs a place to stay.

also loves bunnies.

"Lovely," Dante thought. Officially Pyro now lives with Dante.

Few days later...

"What the- get away from me!" Vergil yelled at Pyro. To Pyro's conclusion, he is wearing BLU, so he is the enemy.

"HMMMPH KMEHMEHA," screaming his war cry while charging at Vergil. Dante was amused at this, or rather laughing hysterically. All was silent as Vergil had cut the Pyro's head off. Out of nowhere, thousands of little bunnies had come out of the suit attacking Vergil. The REAL Pyro was sleeping and had lent a bunny a spare suit. Lady had come through the door and had witnessed this hilarious event. Laughing her ass off, she closed the door and had asked Dante for the bathroom. Walking upstairs, she had awoken Pyro who was walking downstairs to check on his pet bunnies. Lady eyed this person suspiciously and proceeded to use the bathroom.

Pyro had to pull off every single bunny on Vergil, who was embarrassed that he got DOMINATED by bunnies. Dante who was filled in on Pyro's dilemma, he knows that Vergil will have the worst case of mental break down... and rabies.

A/N: Yeah... Well! More stories to come, reviews are appreciated. If you do millions of Bunnies will probably hug you which will turn into a mauling. A very Fluffy mauling though. Suggestions are helpful. Anyway til next time, ENJOY.