Author's Note: Urzai is deep and beautiful, but Zutara was my first love. 3
This is an AU oneshot. It takes place in Ba Sing Se, in 'modern' times (aka a twenty-first century Earth Kingdom). And, yes, it is so fluffy, it looks like the Stay-puffed Marshmallow Man.
Enjoy!
Zutara Week 2012: Serendipity
I always knew when Katara had something on her mind. It was kind of like a radar sense in the back of my brain, next to the little lizard part that propelled my sense of self-preservation. Considering the waterbender's fierce personality, the Katara Mood-swing Radar and the Little Lizard Radar were, of course, practically the same thing.
But, that's aside the point. The point is, I knew something was bothering my blue-eyed friend as we sat, side by side, in her dad's back garden. Katara had on her normal weekday outfit of a faded old t-shirt-this one in particular said, 'Waterbenders Are Hot'-and crisp blue jeans. But she had left her shoes and her mother's necklace somewhere inside the house.
Now, I knew that was odd, and anyone would agree with me if they had seen Katara refuse to take off that ratty old necklace for anything less than a life-or-death situation. Seriously; she practically snapped off her chemistry teacher's head for even suggesting it. I, as the "teaching assistant," had had to intervene, and had nearly been decapitated myself. And, yes, I was a "teaching assistant," but that's just a nice way of saying I was doing community service to get out of detention.
Anyway, I couldn't help but notice that Katara's number one possession was missing, leaving an empty space at the base of her throat. I leaned towards her, trying to gauge what mood had struck her by the tone of her deep blue eyes. "So, is there some reason why we're sitting out here?" I asked, mentally crossing my fingers that the answer would be non-girly.
Katara chewed on her lip for a moment, still staring at the boggy marsh behind her yard. Her family's town house on the outskirts of Ba Sing Se backed right up to an abandoned rice field; such was their status in the grand old city. Our legs were dangling over the lip of a rough wooden partition that kept the swampland where it belonged. She wiggled her leg out far enough to dip a couple toes into the brackish water. I made a face. "Katara, that water is disgusting. You'll probably get malaria, or something."
"You say that every time," Katara reminded me, "and, look, I'm still alive!"
"By some kind of providence," I retorted. "I bet you used to drink this stuff, too."
"When I was seven!"
"Well, you still drank it, didn't you?"
"Whatever," Katara said, reverting back to her withdrawn silence.
I frowned; nit-picking with her was infinitely better than watching her sink into disquiet. "Katara, something's bothering you."
She nodded, hiding her face behind her long, wavy brown hair.
I waited, but she didn't talk. I knew I would have to press her. "What is it?"
"I-I-I can't believe I picked you!" Katara said at last, then hid her face in her hands. "Oh, man, that came out wrong! Um-"
"Uh..." I stared, nonplussed. "Katara, what are you talking about?"
It was pretty funny, actually, watching her wrestle with herself. With a frustrated sigh, Katara flipped her head back and forth, scrubbing her face like it had an inch of grease on it. At length, she pulled her hair back, took a deep, diaphragm-crunching breath, and said, "Zuko, would you kiss me?"
I waited for the punch line. And then I waited some more, all the while locking eyes with Katara-Katara, my fifteen year-old, freshman friend. Katara, who had probably never kissed a boy in her life aside from her brother. Katara, who had probably never even entered the word 'kissing' into a search engine. I waited, but the drum-role never came.
"What did you just say?"
Katara had made up her mind. I could see it in the way she straightened her shoulders and reiterated, quite clearly, "Zuko, would you kiss me?"
Oh, crap. She was serious, wasn't she?
The only thing I could say came out much more emphatically than I had intended. "Why?"
"You know what's happening on Monday?"
"Your birthday," I said, the answer automatic. I had chiseled the date into my head, swearing to myself that I would be at her party this year. I hadn't forgotten her look of betrayal when I had told her, shamefaced, that I couldn't come to her fifteenth birthday because I had been caught trespassing on government property. I had spent the night in a miserable little jail cell underneath Ba Sing Se's central police station, getting a lecture from one of the Dai Li about respecting the traditions of his city, etcetara, blah-blah-blah.
"Yes," Katara said, confirming my statement. "I'm turning sixteen on Monday, and..." She looked away. "And I've never been kissed. So, I want to change that."
"Why?" I asked again, honestly confused. Was there some kind of unwritten law of womanhood that dictated what a girl should accomplish by sixteen? If so, that would explain a lot about the girls I knew, especially my own sister, Azula.
"Why?" Katara repeated, looking skeptical. "Because everyone else has kissed somebody by now! And I haven't, and I know it's only because of Sokka, but-" She blushed, avoiding my eyes. "You've kissed lots of girls, right?"
I caught the drift of her thoughts. "Wait," I said slowly, raising an eyebrow, "you think nobody wants to kiss you, don't you?" When she didn't answer and only blushed harder, I knew I was right. "Katara, you're fifteen! Of course nobody has kissed you! At least, nobody my age, because...that's illegal, or something."
"No, it's not," Katara said defiantly, "we're both minors!"
"Okay, technically speaking, I won't be eighteen until next month," I said sarcastically, rolling my eyes.
Katara fidgeted with the hem of her t-shirt. "Look, Zuko, if you don't want to help me, I can find somebody else. Maybe Jet-"
Oh, heck, no. I shuddered to think of what would happen if Katara asked that maniac for a kiss. Jet wouldn't be so bad, if he wasn't a megalomaniac anarchist and didn't think the entire world was out to kill him. But just picturing Katara-who had never even held a boy's hand-offering herself up to Jet made me faintly ill. "If I agree to this, will you feel like you've filled your kiss quota for now?"
"Yes," Katara nodded. "I just want one kiss, just to know what it feels like."
"Well, if it's one kiss..." It wouldn't be wrong... "Between friends..." It wouldn't be romantic...
"Right, right," Katara was hasty to say, "just as friends."
"I guess I could do that," I said grudgingly.
Katara gave me a sunny smile and leaned toward me. I instantly freaked out. "Wait, you meant right now?"
I could tell that I had killed her buzz. "Oh, Zuko," Katara groaned, hitting her forehead with her palm.
"Sorry, sorry! It just took me by surprise, that's all." I relaxed a little, unsticking my hands from the edge of the wooden planks.
"Are you ready now, your highness?" Katara asked dryly.
I looked at her, sitting there on the dusty partition, relaxed but obviously nervous. I swallowed, feeling something bubble up in my stomach. It felt like the first time I had ever kissed a girl: back in middle school, in my family's ostentatious, ornamental garden. The girl, Azula's friend, Mai, had long black hair and bone-white skin. In most ways, she was the exact opposite of Katara.
But, no, I shouldn't feel nervous, I reminded myself, because this wasn't a real kiss. I had no romantic designs for Katara; she was a kid, a lot younger than me. She was curious, and I was her mature, older friend. I was going to help her, and that was it. I was going to act honorably, give her one little kiss, and get this over with.
Gently, I took Katara's hand and pulled her closer to me. She shuffled her thighs sideways on the wood until we were close enough to hug. I let go of her hand and used both of mine to cup her face. She looked right at me. I could see some uncertainty in her eyes.
I smiled. "Don't worry; I'll be really nice."
"I'm not worried," Katara said, with a smile of her own.
"All right, then, here it goes." And I brought her lips to mine.
My first thought was that I had definitely had better kisses. I had once kissed Jin, a girl a few years older than me, and that had been one of the best. Kissing Mai had been pleasant, too. Katara's kiss was too uncompromising; her lips were tight and resistant. I pulled back and, before I knew what I was saying, began to instruct her like we were in a bending session. "Don't tense up so much; you should enjoy it."
"Hmmm..." Katara pulled back, too, thoughtfully touching her lips. "Like this?" She gave me another quick peck.
I shook my head. "That's fine for kissing your brother-"
"How yould you know?" she asked slyly.
I rolled my eyes. "But if you want to prolong it, you're going to have to relax."
"Show me."
I should have known then that she could control me however she wanted. Katara hadn't asked if I wanted to kiss her again; she just knew I would do it, if she told me to. And I did, reconnecting with her lips and guiding her into a slower kiss. Seemingly on instinct, she gave a happy little sigh and reached out, pulling me closer to her.
I pulled back immediately, swallowing. "There, I kissed you. Are you happy?"
"Hm." Katara tilted her head, studying my face as it was illuminated by the afternoon sun. She pursed her lips. "Just one more, for practice." Before I could consent or refuse, she had gotten me in a liplock.
Okay, I admit it; one or two little trial runs were fine by me. They weren't steamy in any way. It had been like kissing my sister (which I haven't done since I was, like, four). However, the moment Katara added her own flavor to the kiss-when she draped her arms around my neck and pressed herself so trustingly close to me-I knew I was in trouble. My cheeks grew hot as I felt myself being drawn in by those warm, sweet lips.
"Whoa," I gasped, breaking away and pulling her arms off of me. "Okay, practice is over for today."
Katara seemed disappointed, but then she caught sight of my wide eyes and flushed cheeks. "Zuko," she said, looking shocked, "did I make you uncomfortable?"
"Ugh..." I hid my expression in my palm. I fought down the heat creeping slowly up inside me, taking the measured breaths that controlled my firebending.
"I'm sorry," Katara said sheepishly.
"That's all right, Katara. You didn't mean anything by it."
She stayed silent so long I looked over to make sure she was all right. I had pretty much shoved her off of me, so I had to see if I had hurt her feelings. As tomboyish as Katara could be, she was still a girl, and I didn't want her first kiss to be bundled up with feelings of rejection. Katara was staring out over the swamp, her blue eyes distant and her lower lip stuck out in her classic comtemplative expression.
"Are you okay?" I asked, ignoring how smooth her lips suddenly appeared to me.
Katara started. "Huh? Oh, yes, I'm fine, Zuko!"
"Okay..."
"You know," she said, with another smile, "it's kind of hot out here. Good old Ba Sing Se summer, huh?" She stood, brushing off the back of her jeans. "I think I'll go inside and get us some watermelon juice-"
It was almost like one of those out-of-body experiences my uncle always described. Before either of us knew what had happened, I had caught her wrist, yanked her back to the grass, and plastered myself against her. Katara gasped, perhaps as equally shocked as I was. I managed to croak, "Sorry," before fixing my lips to hers.
My body temperature had risen at least five degrees. I could tell by the way Katara's lips felt cool in comparison to my own. I held myself carefully so I wouldn't smash her against the ground. I heard Uncle Iroh's voice: "Every girl is a flower, Zuko, a delicate flower that must be treated with care and love." This piece of advice from my crazy old uncle rang through my head as I stared down at Katara's sun-tanned face. I broke off the kiss, doing my best not to pant right in her face.
"Oh, man," I breathed, leaning back. "Katara, I am so sorry. I don't know what just happened-"
I broke off as Katara began to giggle. Her eyes were closed, and her hands were still thrown back above her head from where I had pinned them. I gaped at the demented waterbender as she rolled to her side, overcome with feminine chuckles. "That was hilarious!" she said, putting a hand to her mouth. "What was that, Zuko, some kind of not-so-sneaky sneak attack?"
My face flooded with shame. "I can't believe I just did that," I said, putting my head between my legs, gripping my hair like I wanted to pull every strand out. "I'm such an idiot! If your dad had seen that-"
"Yeah, he would have pounded you into the ground," Katara finished the sentence, cackling away.
"Katara, really, I'm sorry. I didn't mean for that to happen-"
"Obviously not, or you would have kept on doing it," Katara said, rolling onto her stomach. She frowned when she took in my vertical fetal position. "Hey, Zuko, it's okay. It wasn't that bad." She grinned. "At least I got in a lot of practice!"
I groaned, throwing myself back to the ground. Honestly, I should have counted my lucky stars that Hakoda, Katara's dad, was on a mission for the Earth Kingdom navy. One look at me, the 'troubled child,' molesting his innocent daughter in his backyard would be all it would take to send me to an early grave. That man had rifles, and he knew how to use them.
At the moment, all I could think was how I had pounced on a doe-eyed freshman like some kind of pervert. In that instant, I felt like the delinquent everyone made me out to be. Most of the time, I refused to haul around the labels the world tried to stick on me. But as I looked at Katara, lying in the grass with her guard down and a smile all for me, I knew I did deserve being called a troublemaker for the unwholesome thoughts that raced through my head.
I knew that I had betrayed Katara's trust.
"I think I'd better go home, now," I muttered. I rose without looking at her again; I couldn't stand it. "I'll see you on Monday, Katara."
"Zuko, what's wrong?" Katara called. I didn't answer, heading toward the gate at the front of the townhouse's fence. "Zuko, wait!"
My hand was just pulling back the latch when Katara crashed into me and we both smacked into the gate. Our mutual cries of pain mixed with the creak of the wood as we slid down the fence, tangled up in one another's limbs.
I shook my head, feeling woozy. "Katara," I cried, "what the heck was that-"
Her answer was a clumsy collision of her lips on mine. I went still as she got a better grip on me and firmed up her kiss, pressing insistently on my mouth until I had no choice but to give in. I wrapped my arms around her, oblivious to the fact that we were already as close as possible because of the fall. The wooden fence was hard and uncomfortable on my back, so I stood us both up. Katara leaned into me; I balanced my weight to keep us both on our feet.
I pulled back just enough to say, "Um, I'm not really sure what you're hoping to accomplish, here-"
"Oh, just let me kiss you, you dork," Katara said impatiently, and resumed said kiss. I was all too happy to oblige.
I don't know how long this might have gone on, but it did go on for ten blissful minutes. Then I got a rather unpleasant shock as something heavy knocked into the side of my head and almost threw me off my feet. I yelped and covered my head as Katara shouted, "Sokka!"
Oh, crap. The irate, older brother was home.
Reflexes honed from years of street fighting paid off as I flinched and ducked, narrowly missing another run-in with Sokka's infamous steel boomerang. I had never taken that stupid thing seriously-I mean, come on, what was a boomerang against a gun? But as I clutched my head and pulled back bloody fingers, I realized I should have treated the Water Tribe weapon with more respect.
"What is going on here?" bellowed Sokka, brandishing his boomerang. I took a few steps back.
"Nothing, Sokka," Katara said, but her blush blew her cover.
"You!" The boomerang went whistling past my ear. I had to stagger out of the way. "Zuko!" He said something that sounded like, "What-uh-crap-ur-oo-doo-ip-du-Kuphara?"
"What?" I asked, my ears ringing. I shook my head, trying to clear it. Sokka's boomerang packed a better punch than I thought it would. The garden started to spin.
"Zuko?" Katara waved a hand in front of my face. The result must not have been reassuring, because she turned on Sokka and hit him with a fist. "Sokka! Wha-tah-heck! Look-it-whu-did!"
"I...am going to sit down," I told them, and collapsed.
...A couple minutes later, I was revived by a cold splash of water in my face. I let out a groan and massaged my head. Katara patted my hand and threw another cup of water on me for good luck.
Sokka was standing over me, his arms folded across his brand-name t-shirt, the hateful boomerang clutched in one hand. "Sorry about knocking you out," he said, with an awkward shrug. "My boomerang's made of metal. I can't exactly modulate its impact."
"No kidding," I said, sitting up. "Still, I guess I kind of deserved that."
"Darn right, you did!" Sokka couldn't refrain from a tirade. "I leave you alone with my baby sister, thinking, 'Oh, it's Zuko, he's a nice guy, he'll take care of her, ' and this is what I get? A nice view of my firebending friend taking advantage of her?"
"Don't be ridiculous, Sokka!" Katara said. "If I had been in trouble, I would have waterbent Zuko's butt into the swamp!"
"That's true, she would," I agreed.
Sokka threw his hands up. "So, you seduced her. Is that supposed to make me feel better?"
"Sokka!" gasped Katara, turning beet red.
I felt my own face flush as my annoyance rose. "For your information, Sokka, she asked me to kiss her!" I snapped, wiping the water off my forehead. "Didn't you?" I asked Katara.
"Yes, I did," Katara said, facing her brother with her hands on her hips.
Sokka's mouth popped open. His eyes bugged out as he pointed from me to Katara, then from Katara to me, then back again. He regained his powers of speech, but just barely. "But-bu-but-what-"
"Oh, Sokka, get over it," huffed Katara, tossing her her hair. I pointedly did not look at the way the dark brown strands came to rest on her narrow waist. "Besides, Zuko didn't mean anything by it; he was just helping me out." Was I wrong, or did I hear a note of strain in her voice?
"So, that makes it okay, that he didn't mean it?" screeched Sokka, his voice skipping a few octaves in its disbelief. "No, that does not make it okay! That makes it worse! And what, exactly, was he helping you out with? Why do you need to know how to make out with guys?"
"Oh, please," I broke in, "I was not making out with her! It was just a kiss!" Maybe Sokka didn't know the difference between the sweet, fresh kisses Katara and I had been exchanging and a real make-out session, but I did. And it had not been the same, not even close.
"That was the longest kiss I've ever seen," said Sokka.
Katara's eyes narrowed, and Sokka seemed to know he had said something wrong. "Are you saying you stood there and watched us for a while?"
"No!" Sokka said, but the genetic blushing mechanism betrayed him.
"And, then-after you spied on us for who knows how long-then you ran out and hit Zuko on the head?"
"No, no, that's not what happened!"
I suppressed a grin at the fury boiling up within Katara. "Sokka!" she cried, throwing out her hands as the swamp water began to rise behind her, "you are the sickest, weirdest, most annoying brother in the history of the universe!" She took a waterbending stance, a cue by which I figured I should probably head for higher ground. I leapt atop a sturdy cement urn on the townhouse's back porch.
Sokka managed an "Eep!" before he started to scramble backwards, tripping over a lawn chair in his haste to get out of the warpath of his enraged, waterbending sister.
Katara was still ranting. "You know, it's no wonder I don't have any boys who are interested in me!" she yelled, commanding the marsh with perfect control, forming two blunt waterwhips in her hands. "You'd scare them all away, anyway, wouldn't you? Is that why you act so weird all the time? To scare potential boyfriends away?"
"Katara!" Sokka backed up against the wall. "Katara, Dad's going to kill you if you flood the house..."
"I'm going to kill you, if you don't apologize for being such a psycho!" Katara wasn't really one to talk; she looked a little crazy, wielding her waterwhips of doom, snapping them inches away from her brother's knees. Sokka screamed and jumped over one pillar of water only to get smacked by the other.
As much as I was enjoying the show, I knew it had gone on long enough. "Come on, Katara, calm down," I called, safe on top of my urn. "It wasn't that big a deal."
"How can you say that? He knocked you in the head!"
"Sokka's just trying to look out for you," I said. "Trust me, Azula may not be the nicest sister ever, but if a guy was messing with her, I'd still burn his fingers off." ...And probably several other appendages, I conceded in my head.
"Yes, Zuko, but you wouldn't act like a freak so boys wouldn't come around her, would you?" Katara said, scowling. She turned back to her brother. "Zuko lets boys talk to Azula, because he's a normal human being!"
In the privacy of my head, I corrected Katara and told her that I had absolutely no control over what my spoiled, favored younger sister did. After all, she had her own car; I had to share with my uncle. She had her own bank account; my personal account had been closed since I was thirteen. We didn't even live in the same town, anymore; I lived in a tiny apartment, and she lived back home, in our family mansion. Azula had all the power as far as sibling control went, and she knew it.
"Sokka's just looking out for you," I repeated, sliding off the urn and approaching her with my hands held out. "He just wants to make sure some low-life punk from the bad side of the ring doesn't break your heart. And, really, I would have been surprised if he didn't act that way when he saw you with me." I realized how bitter I sounded, and shook my head. "I-I just need to go, Katara. Thanks for...picking me. I hope I helped you fill your quota. But...I'm going, now."
Katara dropped the waterwhips. "No, Zuko-"
"Good idea," Sokka said. Katara threw him a glare. "Oh, and, uh, no hard feelings, man," he added, sticking his boomerang back into his belt loop with a sheepish grin. "But, don't come back here for at least a month, or I can't promise your safety!"
I was already through the back gate, but I could hear the water slap the back of Sokka's head from the street. He yelped, "Ow, Katara! Sheesh! I was mostly kidding!"
The sound of her footsteps on the grass followed me. "Zuko!"
I jammed my hands into my pockets and slouched my shoulders forward, projecting an image I didn't feel. I needed to toughen up and ignore the way my heart was telling me to go back and tell her that I had meant it, without even trying; I had liked kissing her. I liked her, Katara, all of her, and I didn't care if anyone else approved of my feelings or not.
The crazy thing was, my feelings had been right in front of me this whole time, and I had ignored them. All it took to set them off was one kiss in the backyard.
"Zuko, wait!"
I stopped walking, but I didn't turn around. A montage of memories flashed before my eyes: Katara, waiting for me at the train station after school; Katara, fighting with me over my latest misdemeanor; Katara, screaming at me, 'I know you're better than this!' Katara, refusing to be pushed away from me, even when I alienated everyone else.
She was everything good in my life. She had been there for me, and she understood parts of me that no one else did. Suddenly, age didn't matter, anymore. I felt so blind; I had let something stupid like dates on a calendar separate me from the best thing I had ever had.
"Zuko?"
I wanted to tell her about my split-second revelation. But, in the end, my spirits-forsaken sense of honor won out. I couldn't dump my pathetic little confession on her narrow shoulders. "I'll be at your birthday party," I called, striding down the street. "I'll see you then."
"Zuko!" Katara hadn't given up. Her shadow appeared behind me on the pavement, running to catch up. "Zuko!"
"Goodbye, Katara!"
"No!" she shouted, sounding close to tears. "Don't you dare run out on me, now! Do you think I'm stupid? I know the difference between what you did and what I asked you to do, Zuko!"
I couldn't help myself; I turned around. "And what, exactly, do you think I did?"
Katara caught up to me, panting. As she threw her hair out of her eyes, she gave me a penetrating look. "You kissed me like you meant it," she said.
"I...I'm a good actor," I said, and winced. That had been a poor excuse for an excuse.
"No, you're not," Katara retorted. "You kissed me, Zuko-"
"Because you asked me to!" I cut in, trying valiantly to hold on to my conviction.
Katara sighed. "No, you didn't."
"Oh, so you didn't ask me-"
"You kissed me because you're in love with me!"
Katara's last, impassioned cry echoed off the dusty houses. I stared at her, my insides twisting into knots. "Admit it," she added ruthlessly, with a triumphant nod. She sashayed in front of me, head up and shoulders back, her slightly red eyes daring me to contradict her.
I wet my lips. I knew I didn't have any choice but to give in, but I wasn't going to make it easy. "Okay, I'm in love with you, Katara," I said roughly, but my voice caught. "So what? You don't like me, and we're never going to be together. It's not like you would want-"
My body was encased in warmth as a slender, feminine body wrapped itself around me. "You idiot," Katara laughed throatily, kissing me with her warm lips. "Honestly, Zuko, would I have ever asked some guy I didn't even like to kiss me? I can't believe you fell for it-"
In the midst of Katara's warmth, something clicked in my head. "Oh," I said, and brought my arms up to hold her closer. "Wait, are you saying that you love me, to-"
For the first time ever, I wasn't annoyed that Katara didn't let me finish my sentence.
