"What would happen if there was a digi-fiction where the Digi-Destined recognized that they were stars of their own TV show? It'd be a story where the fourth wall would be broken, and most possibly, there would be bizarre, out of character actions."
One bad author skritched her head, then grinned hugely.
"I think that'd be pretty cool!"
She took a mallet and gestured at a wall behind her that was messily labeled "Fourth Wall".
"This is the magical wall that separates these Digi-Destineds' show lives from being affected by things in OUR lives. Without this wall up, they can make comments on their show's popularity, products, and various fanworks."
The fourth wall was smashed with one good swing. On the other side was all eight children, sitting at a table, drinking kool-aid. They blinked in confusion at the broken wall and the girl who stood behind the broken wall with a mallet in her hand.
"....who is she?" Hikari asked curiously. Taichi patted her head.
"Oh, it's just a bad fanfiction writer, Kari. Now drink your kool-aid." Tai answered. The little girl nodded, accepting the answer.
Izzy sighed and waved a hand at the intruder. "I don't know why you're here, but please keep it down, we're discussing business."
The writer of poor fanfiction nodded dumbly. "Okay...."
Izzy turned back to the others. "Tai, you have to kiss someone on the show."
"Why?? I saved Sora and held Matt's hand, isn't that enough?" he spat back.
"Well, no, Tai....see, most people WATCH our show because they think you have a deep relationship with either Sora or Matt." Izzy explained matter-of-factly. Tai shook his head stubbornly.
"And which one am I suppose to kiss?? Kiss one, the other set of fans get mad! Besides, isn't it best to be...you know...subtle? Let people read in what they want?" the leader of the group complained.
"What's wrong, Tai?" asked Sora, looking a little hurt.
"He probably has bad breath." Matt said smugly. Tai's face went red.
"THAT IS SUCH A LIE!"
Kari sunk low in her seat. "....well, actually....Tai...uhm..."
Izzy perked as Kari spoke. "Oh yes, that's another thing. Kari and TK, you two need to do something cute, like hug or hold hands."
Tai and Matt blinked stupidly a few times.
"Why should they do THAT, Izzy? They're cute enough." Matt said.
"Well, people think THEY'RE a couple too." Izzy said with a yawn.
"NO!" Tai cried, slamming a fist on the table.
"Not with someone related to THAT guy!! ....no offense, Kari, you're a nice kid....BUT NO!! TK, you CAN'T get involved with her!"
"....what are they talking about?" TK asked, confused. Kari shrugged.
"I dunno. Guess we shouldn't tell them we already promised each other we'd get married." she said, sipping her kool-aid.
"WHAT??"
"NO!! Then I'd be...be....HIS BROTHER-IN-LAW!!"
"Well, you two already FIGHT like in-laws." Joe pointed out boredly. The two bickering brawlers stopped and thought about that.
"Say, that's true."
"That's actually a great point."
"BUT....that could interfere with the yaoi." Izzy said, shaking his head.
"I'm a child, not a porno actor." Tai said unhappily.
"You're telling me. I'm the MAN, not the MAN'S man."
"Yaoi doesn't necessarily MEAN sex will take place." Mimi said suddenly.
Everyone stared at her.
"However, the more correct term for a male-male relationship in anime where no sex occurs would be shounen ai. That's what you would both prefer, at THIS age....less messy."
"And what would YOU know about YAOI, Mimi?" Izzy asked, confused.
"I know it well enough. After all, it's like YURI....which is pretty much the same thing, except for girls. People do that sort of thing to me and Sora too, you know." said the cowgirl haughtily. "Besides that, they also are ALWAYS pairing me up with one of you guys."
Matt, Joe, and Izzy squirmed uncomfortably in their seats at the thought.
"You've been doing alot of talk about OTHER peoples' relationships on the show, Izzy. What about YOU?" Sora asked.
"What about me?! What about YOU??" Izzy shot back, uncomfortable with the subject.
"I'm paired with plenty of people, Izzy. Usually Tai, if it's yuri, Mimi. Sometimes I'm even put with Joe or Matt."
Izzy sulked.
"I'm sorry, no one ever pairs us!" Sora said sheepishly.
"Well, it's just that they always put me with Joe or Mimi. How am I suppose to KISS either of them?? I don't carry around a step ladder."
"....this is all really confusing, why don't we just do the show and let people think what they want without trying to do things extra for them?" Joe asked.
"NO! Our older audience DEPENDS on this kind of stuff, Joe!" Izzy exclaimed.
"..........Izzy, do you REALLY want to woo me? I'd want chocolates. But you'd have to find just the right kind because I'm allergic to most kinds of nuts." Joe said flatly.
"........coconut?"
"Especially allergic to coconut."
Tai shook his head and heaved a sigh. "All these relationships....I don't want to kiss ANYONE...not Matt or Sora."
"Why not?!"
"Yeah, why not??"
Tai stared at the both of them. ".....excuse me?"
Both sweatdropped. "Not like we want to kiss you, Tai." Sora explained.
"We're just both upset because you say it as if something is WRONG with us. It's not like WE'RE thrilled about people wanting us to kiss you." Matt added.
Another sigh got heaved by Tai. "....look, all *I* want to do is do the show, play with my sister, and play soccer. And beat Matt senseless, but that's not important right now."
"That's just the kind of thing that makes people suspect yaoi, Tai." Joe said, rolling his eyes.
"I have a relationship with him because I can beat him up?? KINKY."
"Hey, YOU beat ME up?" Matt spat out angrily, standing up. He was ready to fight.
Tai laughed. "Well, YEAH, Matt."
"I don't have to take this from you, you brat! C'MON! STAND UP AND FIGHT!"
"FINE! I WILL!"
The others watched them beat each other up.
"TK, have you talked to the Payperview channel yet?" Kari asked as she wiped kool-aid from her face.
TK wiped his face and nodded. "They'll be airing their fights for five bucks a showing starting in two weeks, Kari."
"This all is such a pain. I'm just going to do the show as it is. All this extra stuff is a pain." Joe grumbled.
Sora nodded. "It IS alot of trouble....we should just go with it."
"Good! I can't decide who I want to kiss anyway!" Mimi said, clasping her hands together.
"But....what about our older fans??" Izzy sputtered.
"That's what NC-17 fanfiction is for." TK and Kari answered in one voice as they looked over the contract they had gotten with Payperview.
"......WHAT??"
The fight between Matt and Tai stopped.
"And how would you two know about that sort of thing???"
"......Matt, do you REALLY do that to Tai....?"
"Tai, did you and Matt--"
"NO!!!!!"
"............did you and Sora...?"
"NO!!!!"
"You and Mimi....?"
"NO!!!!"
"...this sucks, POKEMON doesn'--" Tai started to say but what cut off.
"Yes, it DOES." everyone said.
"...okay, MONSTER RANCHER doesn't have this problem." he said instead.
"That's because Monster Rancher only has two human characters." Izzy pointed out. He was feeling a headache coming on. He gave up. "Fine, just do whatever, but I'm telling you, it could effect the ratings."
The idiotic author scratched her head and watched the meeting break up.
".....maybe I can catch the Tai and Matt fight on TV! Cool!"
AUTHOR'S NOTE: I'm not aganist yaoi....you like yaoi, s'fine by me. I don't HATE yaoi. Just don't dig it. And note....Tai didn't wanna kiss Sora too, darn it! I'M BEHAVING! No shounen ai and no regular romance either. So there. Ha. But just in case you're wondering.....yes. Tai and Sora, Matt and Mimi, TK and Kari are my couples of choice. ....and Gomamon and Gatomon. ^^ If anyone has any requests to make of me, just drop me a line at SailaPyro@aol.com, or IM me. Whatever! I enjoy making fun of many many things.