Disclaimer: see my profile
A/n this is set right after "Memoriam." Thanks again to my excellent beta, REIDFANATIC, for her help and friendship. And, thanks to all my loyal readers. Your support always makes me smile.
To Spencer, it seemed like no time had passed as he held his new godson in his arms and studied his tiny face. He didn't know what to think of the sleeping baby. To him, the baby didn't really look like anyone, yet. He knew that most people had an opinion about resemblances of newborn children, but he thought they were like blank slates. That wasn't to say, he thought, that Henry didn't look like anyone, it was – well he didn't really know how to explain it, even to himself.
Henry shifted a bit in his arms, and drew his attention back to the little boy and away from his inner musings. The baby opened his mouth and Spencer froze. What if he cried? Holding his godson was one thing, handling him when he cried was quite another. The baby didn't cry. Instead, his mouth began to make little sucking motions. Something stirred in Spencer, something that made his eyes sting and his chest ache. He glanced over to see if JJ were watching, but she was deep in conversation with Garcia. Will was chatting with Morgan and Emily, and Hotch was in discussion with Rossi and Jordan.
He looked back at Henry and his heart jumped into his throat again. Henry's eyes were open! They didn't make contact, but it didn't matter because now he saw JJ in those eyes and it hit him that Henry was part of their quirky little family. This little guy was part of one of his best friends. Oh boy! He'd agreed to be Henry's godfather. Could he do it? Henry's eyes closed again and the spell was broken.
"Hey, Spence, you okay?"
He looked over to see that Garcia and JJ were watching him with big smiles on their faces.
"Yeah, gorgeous grey matter, what you thinkin?"
"I was thinking," he began with a squeak. "I was thinking, this is all real. You had a baby," he directed to JJ.
She chuckled, then rolled her eyes. "I certainly hope so. I feel like a just passed bowling ball."
Garcia burst into laughter at the same time Henry woke and began to cry as if Spencer was pinching him black and blue. "Um, what do I do?"
"I think you give him to his mommy," Garcia suggested.
That was a phenomenal idea, he decided. At least, he thought it was a good idea until Henry left his arms and then he felt loss that cut into his heart like a knife. He smiled at JJ because he didn't want her to know his disappointment. The conflicting feelings of relief and sadness confused him. Was this what he'd have to deal with going forward? He didn't know if he liked that idea because life was much easier without the emotional rollercoaster.
Then he looked at Henry in JJ's arms and the way she smiled with pure joy and he decided that he didn't want to return to a life without Henry. He'd ride the rollercoaster to its end, because the alternative was unthinkable.
"Hey, pretty boy," Morgan interrupted his thoughts. "I think JJ needs to feed Henry. Let's go."
"Oh, right."
"Spence."
"Yeah."
"Thanks for coming to see us and for agreeing to be Henry's godfather."
"Yeah, thank you," Will said and shook his hand firmly.
"You're welcome."
"Go home and get some rest," JJ ordered as she jiggled Henry in her arms.
He didn't want to leave, but his eyes were burning from exhaustion. "Okay," he agreed. "See you later, Henry."
He knew that when his mind was cleared from exhaustion, he might freak out a little, but for now he had a tiny miracle to turn his life upside down and that was just fine with him.